Chapter Six

Monday brought all of the unease that I could possibly feel to the surface. My entire day was disrupted with thoughts of the early evening. I had a meeting with Roland about potentially climbing on-board his business as a partner. It was something that we had always planned and the prospect of it becoming a reality honestly stunned me. It was difficult for me to wrap my head around everything that had happened.

I spent the majority of the day wishing that I had taken a personal day or called in sick. I was distracted to the point of feeling ill. Nevertheless, I managed to complete all of the work that I needed to and I thought that I handled myself quite well in the only boardroom meeting we had for the day.

I would have felt much better if I had not been there at all that day. That was, so long as I didn’t think about the fact that that meant I would have been at home with nothing to occupy me other than my thoughts. Then again, perhaps I would have been able to go into Roland’s office first thing that morning if I had not gone to work. That was more or less the kind of train of thought I was on for most of the day. It was confusing and maddening and couldn’t make up its mind in what direction it was actually headed.

“Hello?” Roland’s voice answered. I had left my office and was walking to my car when I called him.

“Hi, Roland. It’s Lyle.”

“Oh, hey. What can I do for you?”

“I’ve just finished up the last of my work for the day. Are we still on for a chat?”

“Yeah, we’re definitely still on. How soon can you get here?”

“It only takes about twenty minutes to get from one side of the town to the other, Row. I’ll be there in about five, though.”

“Ha. Okay, see you soon.”

“See you.”

I hung up the phone, shoving it into my pocket. I walked a little bit faster after the call. I had to roll my eyes at myself, feeling like one of those young girls who skipped in happiness. It was very tempting. Roland’s voice sounded as nice as I remembered it sounding, proving that the way I was feeling had not been due to the punch on Friday night.

It may have been a slight exaggeration that it only took twenty minutes to drive from one side of the town to the other but it really wasn’t far off. It was probably closer to an hour if you considered all the twists and turns and the hustle and bustle. No, there wasn’t much hustle and bustle in such a small place, but it was enough to keep everyone on their toes. Our traffic wasn’t what the rest of the world would have called traffic. Thankfully, I had managed to get off of work early, so I missed the early evening traffic anyway.

I was outside of the office in less than five minutes, not that I thought Roland would be timing me or anything. His office was in the middle of a high-end business estate that had gone up only a couple of months before. All of the buildings looked sleek and modern, finished with reflective glass and most fitted with revolving door entrances. I had no doubt that the interiors would be all expensive carpets and sleek tiles. The league of the big boys, I thought, as I parked across from the address.

There had not been many times in my life where I could say that I felt underdressed. In the past four days, I could say that I had felt that way twice. I entered the building through the shiny revolving doors and I was proved right about its interior—tiles so clean that they literally gleamed. There were several people in the lobby of the building, all of them immaculately dressed. The women had salon-styled hair and wore too much make-up for you to miss the fact that they were wearing make-up.

On the opposite end of the lobby was a desk which I assumed to be reception. On either side of the room were walls lined with leather seats, a coffee table before each of them, stacked with magazines. I figured that this was meant to be a waiting area. There were vending machines for sodas and snacks on either side, as well. There were elevators and doors to the stairwells on either side of the reception desk.

The one thing that I had not asked over the phone was which floor Roland’s office was on. That meant there was only one thing for me to do. I made my way to the reception desk. It was silly, I know, but I felt as though all eyes were on me as I made the trek. I knew that they were not really, of course, but I was unable to shake the feeling. Moments before I had reached the desk, the elevator on the right-hand side gave a light ding with its arrival. The doors slid open and I swallowed the question I had been about to pose to the stunning blonde woman at the desk as Roland stepped out of it.

I don’t know why, but I felt like the smile he gave me was one that he reserved personally for me. I got the feeling that that wasn’t a smile he gave everyone. I may have been imagining it, but even the receptionist who had looked up to help me looked slightly surprised by the moment.

Roland walked over to me. I had my hand ready to shake his, but he pulled me into his arms for a hug instead. My senses were once again attacked with the smell of his cologne. He really did smell fantastic. It wasn’t fair.

“Hi, Lyle,” he said. “I’m so glad that you could make it. Please, let’s go to my office.” He gestured toward the elevator and I stepped forward to it, pressing the only button available. We were going up.

I didn’t know what to say, suddenly feeling shy, so I remained silent. The lift arrived with the same soft ding and we stepped into it as it opened. It was empty.

Roland pressed the button for the fifth floor. For some reason, I felt relief wash over me that it had not been the top floor. I was afraid that he had been more than a little modest about the standing of his business and I don’t think that I could have handled it if he was on the top floor. That would have meant too much success, too much pressure. We were silent as we travelled upwards. It was one of those elevators that were on the backside of the building and since the entire building was reflective glass, we could see outwards, although no one could see inwards.

I felt Roland watching me as I stared out of the glass, watching the cars on the street become smaller. I think I had found another reason to be relieved that Roland had not gotten an office on the top floor. When the ding alerted us to our arrival, I looked up to find that he was indeed watching me. He was still wearing that smile. He had a nice smile.

He exited the elevator first and I followed him down a hallway of doors. None of these were glass. They offered privacy. That was good. We stopped at the fifth door and I found it funny that that was two fives in a row. Roland opened the door for me and I stepped in.

The office was massive. Despite not being on the top floor, Roland still had a decent view of our little town. There were not many buildings as tall as this one. The décor was tasteful and I wondered if Roland had done it. He had always had a bit of a flair for decoration. There was a large oak desk, two plush arm chairs in front of it and an office chair behind it. Over on one side of the room, there was a coffee station and a small lounging area with what looked to be a lavish lounge suite from where I was standing. The coffee table was stacked with magazines up here, too.

Roland walked around to the other side of the desk. “Please, have a seat,” he said, gesturing to one of the armchairs as he took his own seat.

I went over to sit before him. “You’ve gotten yourself a pretty sweet gig here, Row.”

“Yes, I really like it. I helped with the decorating, so that’s nice. I prefer a modern touch. The view is the best part though.”

“It’s pretty great,” I said.

“I sometimes get inspired just by looking out the window. It helps for those days when I get stuck. I’ve been here a few months.”

“You have been here for a few months already?” That surprised me.

Roland shrugged. “Yeah. I’d been getting myself a place, securing this office, decorating both. I actually met Alyssa through all of that because I wanted her to design a garden for me at the new house. I plan on getting myself a dog.”

I smiled. I loved dogs. I’d always wanted one, but the place that I was renting wasn’t pet-friendly. It was one of those goals that I planned on reaching later in my life, eventually. “I have always wanted a dog.”

“You can come and visit mine, if you would like.”

“I think I’d like that very much.”

There was that expression again. It was the same one that he had had when we were at the party, the uncertain and vulnerable one. I didn’t know what to make of that expression but each time he pulled it, something twisted inside me and I felt the guilt of the letter overcome me once again.

A knock on the door halted the conversation momentarily.

“Come in,” Roland said.

A tall man with jet black, messy hair opened the door. He was incredibly handsome, with piercing blue eyes and facial hair lining his jaw. He wore an expensive suit, too. I was beginning to think I had a thing for men in suits.

“I’m so sorry that I’m late, Roland. I had to finish filing some last-minute documents.”

“That’s quite all right, Nathan. Have a seat and we can get started,” Roland said. Nathan came to sit beside me. “Lyle, this is my business associate Nathan.”

“Hi,” Nathan said. He extended his hand to me and I shook it.

Shaking this man’s hand was the last thing I had wanted to do. I remembered what Roland had said about seeing someone when I had asked at the party. The man’s name had been Nathan. I had assumed that the reason that Roland had said that things wouldn’t work out between the two of them was because Nathan had been unwilling to move here with him. If that had been the case, it seems as though Nathan had changed his mind. I couldn’t blame him. I had only met my best friend again three days prior and I was already infatuated with him. I couldn’t help but feel sad at the arrival of this handsome man.

“Okay, so, Lyle here has a master’s in business,” Roland started, “He specializes in marketing and accounting. I’ve seen his work and I’m particularly impressed with the marketing aspect of things. I think he could be exactly what we are looking for.”

I raised my eyebrows. “You’ve seen my work?”

“Of course. I had to make sure that we could actually work together?”

“Do you have any of his work for me to look at?” Nathan asked.

“I do.” Roland opened one of the drawers of his desk and pulled out a blue folder. He placed it on the table in front of Nathan.

I watched as Nathan pulled the folder into his lap. I could see some of my best advertising works being pulled out. The folder seemed to be filled mostly with the projects I had been most proud of doing for the company I worked for, but there were one or two of my freelance pieces as well. Since my freelance work had been mostly international, I realized that Roland must have done proper research on me and my work before bringing this idea up with me. I had to admit I was impressed.

“This is really impressive work, Lyle,” Nathan said. “I think Roland may be right. You may be just what we are looking for.”

“What do you do for the business, Nathan?”

“I’m more of a consultant than anything else. I supervise projects where Roland has no extensive knowledge and I obtain the necessary contacts needed to complete such projects.” I suppose I must have looked puzzled because Nathan continued. “For example, Roland was unaware of landscape designs being a thing. I obtained the contact of a woman named Alyssa Burns. She’s the best landscape designer for miles around here. She would do well internationally but thankfully for us, she was available.”

“I see,” I said.

Roland was watching the interaction curiously. “I wanted the two of you to meet today to see if you could get along,” he said. “I believe that you can. Nathan likes your work, as well, so the only thing left is to ask you how you feel about joining us. We would require your knowledge in finances, marketing, and advertising above all else.”

“I would be excited to join you. Would there be some sort of probation period I would have to pass through or would we go right ahead to contracts?”

“I think that’s up to you. I can understand that leaving a job that you already have for something that has only recently been established may be a tough decision to make. We could have you on-board as a temporary consultant for say, three months?”

“Three months?”

“This way, you would be here part-time. It would mean taking a lot of work home with you for the duration, but you would be able to keep the job you’re currently working until you’re certain of where you want to be and until we are certain you would be a fit for this business.” Roland ran a hand through his hair. “I have a set of briefs and a list of information regarding the business so you can look into it a bit further before making your final decision.”

The man had changed so much. It never ceased to amaze me how different Roland had become over the past several years. He was more confident, more outspoken. He seemed like someone who knew exactly what he wanted and he went for it if he did. I had no idea where the gangling teenager I once knew had gone, but I had only seen remnants of him in Roland’s eyes. They revealed all the humor and fun that I knew still rested beneath his surface. They couldn’t hide the openness that I knew he still had.

I was growing obsessed with wanting to get to know the man that my best friend had become. I wanted to know all of him. I wanted to know his wild side, his soft side, and all the other sides that he was keeping hidden from the world underneath the smooth exterior he now carried.

“Do you have any questions?” Roland asked, pulling me out of my thoughts.

“No, I don’t believe I do. I think that will be everything I need from you. It sounds like three months of probation would be the best route for now.”

Roland clapped his hands together, grinning. “Excellent.”

He and Nathan both stood at the same time, sharing a glance that I didn’t quite understand. I once again felt sad. I had not realized how much hope I had rested on the fact that Roland had said he was no longer seeing anyone. I stood, too, after a moment.

Nathan shook my hand once more. “I look forward to working with you, Lyle.” He then turned to Roland. “Do you mind if I take the folder with me? I would like to look at the work a little bit further.”

“Not at all,” Roland said.

With that, Nathan left the room. He paused at the door and gave one last wave. I was sure that the smile on his face was reserved entirely for Roland and it broke any delusion I might have been under that any of Roland’s were reserved entirely for me.

I extended my hand to Roland. He didn’t shake it. He arched one perfectly shaped eyebrow and looked back up at me. “What, no hug?”

“I don’t think that would be appropriate, given the circumstances.”

“The circumstances?”

Roland looked confused. With the ache in my heart, though, I didn’t care to play games. I just wanted to get out of there. I had the smallest desire to have a drink but I wasn’t going to submit to it – I was determined to get healthier for myself. “Please don’t play games with me, Roland.”

“I really don’t know what you’re talking about, Lyle…”

“I should go. I look forward to the prospect of working with you. You have my number should you need to contact me for anything.”

It took everything in me to turn away from him after that. The expression on his face was unbearable. The Roland that I had grown up with finally made an appearance—he was hurt. I knew that. I could see it clearly. Conversely, so was I. I walked out of the office and refused to glance back as I reached the door. I shut it behind me with a soft click and walked back to the elevator. There was an odd ache in my chest I had never felt before.