Anna

 

My legs move toward the man I’ve fallen hopelessly in love with. The space I needed between us did nothing but make me intolerably cranky, according to Dru. When only a couple feet separate us, I pause, not knowing where we stand, just knowing that I need to make sure he’s okay.

“Jay called me,” I explain. “I wanted to be here for you.”

He slides his phone into his pocket and extends his hand, taking mine and pulling me close to his chest. I inhale the scent of him which has become one of my greatest comforts and I let him hold me, as tightly as he needs to. I no longer want space from him, or from us. I want to be here with him, beside him, because it’s where I belong.

“Christ, I missed you,” he says against my hair.

I lean back and tilt my head so he can see me. “I missed you too,” I say.

His lips find mine and everything melts away. The doubt, the hesitation. Sebastian has my heart and I believe I have his. The bumps in our path will be dealt with, but in this moment, we simply need to hold each other.

“How is he?” I ask.

“Sleeping now,” he says. “I guess we just wait it out now.”

“How are you?”

“He was never perfect,” he says. “But I somehow thought he’d be around forever and that nothing could ever bring him down. I’m scared, Anna.”

I wrap my arms tightly around his waist as he holds me close. Letting him know without words that I’m here, and nothing will change that.

 

*

 

Sebastian’s father spent a total of four days in the hospital before he insisted on going home. His doctor agreed under the stipulation that he receive around the clock care, which is apparently as easy thing to arrange when you’re wealthy as he was heading home less than an hour after that very conversation.

I’d held back at the hospital, not wanting to overstep my boundaries, but we’re currently heading to Sebastian’s childhood home so that we can help out. I know things are awkward right now for him and Jay and for him and his father. But he said it was important that he be here and when he asked me to come with him, I didn’t hesitate.

As we leave the city, I begin to picture his childhood suburban home, but nothing comes even remotely close to the mansion we eventually pull up to. A large wrought iron gate greets us and opens automatically and as we make our way down the winding driveway I can sense Sebastian’s tension. I reach for his hand and give it a firm squeeze.

“Are you okay?” I ask.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he says. “It’s just been so long since I’ve been here.”

We park in front of the large white house and Sebastian grabs our bags from the backseat. As I step out of the truck I’m greeted with a familiar voice.

“Ms. Brookes! Ms. Brookes!”

I turn and see Darius running toward us from what I assume is the back yard, Jay close behind him.

“Hi Darius,” I say, pulling him in for a hug. “How’s your summer been?”

He chatters quickly about the swimming lessons he’s been taking and how for the next little while he’s going to be spending time here with his grandpa, because he’s sick.

“That’s why we’re here too,” I say, nodding back at Sebastian.

“Is he your husband?” Darius asks.

“Oh, uh, no he isn’t,” I say with a smile, looking to Jay for an introduction. But before he can say anything, Sebastian steps forward and kneels.

“Hey bud, I’m your uncle,” he says carefully. “My name is Sebastian.”

“I know about you,” Darius says. “My dad talks about you a lot. He says you’re an artist.”

I can see the regret on Sebastian’s face as he looks up at Jay and then back down at Darius.

“I make things,” he explains. “Out of clay. Maybe sometime I could teach you.”

“Cool!” Darius says before he runs up the steps and through the front door.

“I’m sorry about that,” Jay apologizes. “I should have warned you that he’d be here, I wasn’t trying to blindside you.”

“You talk about me to him?” Sebastian asks.

“Of course I do,” Jay says. “You’re my brother.”

“Jay, I’m sorry.”

“Hey, we’re starting over,” Jay says with a shrug before he too heads up the front steps.

I wrap my arm around Sebastian and lean into his side, “It’ll be okay,” I say. “Fresh start, right?”

“Right,” he sighs, pulling me close.

*

 

Still too weak to move around much, Sebastian’s father has spent most of the last several days in his bedroom. Sebastian and Jay have taken turns going up and spending time with him, but he mostly just sleeps on and off. Darius has been restless all morning, so I sent all three of them to the city zoo for the afternoon to get some fresh air. The homecare nurse is here if anything happens and I don’t mind staying behind and giving the boys some bonding time.

I’ve been spending most of my time exploring the house while amusing Darius and one of my favourite rooms is the massive library on the main floor. I’m currently running my fingertips along the leather spines on one of the immaculately kept shelves when I spot Moby Dick. It looks like a first edition. I gently take it off the shelf and I can tell that even though it must be worth a lot of money, it’s been read several times. I take it with me and make my way up the grand staircase toward Barron’s room. I know the nurse is taking her break now and he’s probably resting, but I feel like I should check in on him and make sure he’s okay. I know Sebastian and Jay would appreciate it.

I approach the large double doors and slowly open them, trying my best not to disturb him. Padding through the room quietly, I sit down in the recliner beside the bed. There’s a steady beeping from one of the monitors, but otherwise the room is quiet.

I open the book in my lap and when I’m nearly done the first page a gruff voice asks me, “You plan to read that to me or what?”

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to disturb you,” I say, standing.

“You’re not disturbing me. Sit down,” he wheezes. “You’re Sebastian’s girl, aren’t you?”

“Yes, I’m Anna,” I say.

“Come over here so I can get a look at you,” he instructs.

I lean forward and smile. “Hello,” I say.

“You’re pretty,” he says.

“Thank you.”

“You love him?”

“Yes,” I say without hesitation.

“Hm. I was a terrible father,” he tells me. “And now it’s too late to fix it.”

I place my hand on his. “Both of your sons are here for you Barron, because they want to be. You’re not alone,” I say. “Can I get you anything? Should I get the nurse?”

“I’m fine,” he says. “No need to make a fuss.”

“You have a beautiful library,” I say, eventually.

“It was my wife’s,” he replies. “I bought her every first edition of every classic that I could find, and do you know what her favourite book was?”

“Which one was her favourite?” I ask.

“Some book about a single woman who spends her time drinking and smoking…Bridget something,” he says.

“Bridget Jones?” I ask with a smile.

“I don’t know how many times she’d lay in bed and read that damn thing, laughing until she had tears in her eyes,” he says. And then adding, “I miss her laugh.”

“And this one?” I ask, holding up the copy of Moby Dick so he can see it.

“Ah, that one would be my favourite,” he says.

“Would you like me to read it to you?”

“I think that would make me very happy,” he says.

“It would make me happy as well.”

 

*

 

Barron Maxwell Kent III passed away peacefully two days later, in the company of his two sons. The funeral was small, not quite what the city was expecting for a born and bred royal, so to speak, but it was what he wanted. He was laid to rest beside Sebastian’s mother.

It’s been three weeks since the funeral. Sebastian has been helping Jay sort out the remainder of their father’s affairs, he’s even spent some more time getting to know Darius. I know he still harbours guilt over the last several years, but he and Jay are working at repairing a relationship and I couldn’t be prouder of him. It’s easy to see the differences between the two men, but there are similarities as well. There’s a foundation there and they are lucky to still have each other.

I continue to browse the tables of fresh fruit as I stroll through the market. Sebastian is with Jay at his office, going over some paperwork and I feel like making something special tonight. I place a dozen ripe peaches into a bag and pay the vendor, casually making my way back home. As I walk by the park, my eyes scan the people coming and going, mostly out of habit. I still haven’t seen Jack, and anyone who has tried to help me find him has come up empty. I’m about to turn down the sidewalk when I spot a man sitting on Jack’s usual bench. He’s got short salt and pepper hair and he’s clean shaven, but I know it’s him. I smile as I approach the bench and take the seat beside him.

“How are you doing, Jack?”

“I’m just fine Miss B, and yourself?”

I can’t help but laugh as I feel the prickle of tears in my eyes. “Where have you been?”

“Getting my life back Miss B,” he says. “I’m sorry if I caused you to worry.”

Jack tells me about the circumstances that led him to be homeless and how he finally tracked down his now grown daughter in an attempt to make things right.

“It started small,” he says. “A bet here or there, nothing major. But it all caught up with me eventually and I lost it all. My wife took our daughter and I starting drinking to forget how badly I’d screwed everything up. The more I drank, the more I gambled, until there was nothing left.”

“I’m sorry Jack,” I say.

“Don’t you be sorry for me,” he says. “I had it coming. I could have gotten help, but I was too damn proud. I was a lucky man with a wife and a daughter and I threw it all away. For ten years I’ve lived with nothing, to try and get right with myself.”

Ten years. For a decade Jack has been punishing himself and living on the streets with nothing or nobody.

“What changed?” I ask gently.

“My wife’s sister found me,” he explains. “To tell me she’d passed away. She and her husband don’t live far from here. I’ve been staying with them, trying to get back on my feet.”

“Wow, Jack that’s great,” I say sincerely. “I’m happy for you.”

“I didn’t know if you’d want to know, but I felt like I owed you an explanation,” he says. “You were always so kind to me and I wanted to say thank you.”

“I’m glad you came back,” I tell him. “Thank you for letting me know.”

We visit for a while longer, Jack tells me a bit about his daughter along with his hopes and fears of what might develop between them. We part ways after we exchange mailing addresses and the promise to keep in touch.

I stop by Sebastian’s apartment first and take Bruno for a quick trip around the block. I bring him back to my place and get him settled with a few new chew toys before I lay my supplies out on the counter. As I slice peaches and make the batter for the cake, I hum along with the radio. I place the pan in the oven and set the timer, figuring I have enough time to jump in the shower. Peeling off my dress, I step into the tub, turning the water just a bit cooler than usual. I quickly soap up and rinse off, feeling less sticky from the heat as I wrap a plush blue towel around myself. I unpin my hair and brush it out, twisting it back into a knot before I head into my bedroom, my hand flying to my chest when Sebastian enters the room.

“Oh my God, you scared me,” I gasp.

“Sorry babe, I thought you heard me,” he grins.

“I didn’t,” I laugh. “I was trying to be quick so the cake doesn’t burn.”

“Smells good,” he says, glancing down at my feet and trailing his eyes up the length of my body.

Sebastian has been dealing with so much these last couple of weeks and it seems like we went from a fight, into a grieving period, into trying to move forward in such rapid succession and it’s been a bit challenging. We’ve talked about why he lied to me, and I’ve forgiven him for his reaction that day at the block party. But it still feels like we are stumbling a bit, trying to get back in the groove of us, I suppose.

So when his eyes look just a tad primal by the time they meet my own, I can’t help it when a tiny whimper escapes my now parted lips. It’s my own fault really, but I didn’t want us working through all of this stuff under the distraction of sex. So, I proposed a ban for the time being. A ban that I’m thinking might need to end. I let my towel drop to the floor, I’m naked and flushed and waiting for less than a second before Sebastian closes the space between us and my arms wrap around his neck. He smashes his mouth to mine in a hungry kiss, gripping my backside and hoisting me up.

I wrap my legs around his waist as he guides us back toward the bed. Our tongues meet and when a grumble comes from his chest, I swear I feel the vibration down to my toes.

“Fuck, Anna, I’m not going to last,” he groans, lying me on top of the covers.

He stands and pulls his shirt and jeans off, sliding his boxers down his legs next. His erection is so thick and full that I can’t help myself. I sit up and crawl to the edge of the bed, dipping my head down, I take him into my mouth, swirling my tongue along his length as I take him as deep as I can. I let him go with a pop and repeat. His fingers grip my hair as I lick long, slow strokes.

“Christ, babe, lie back so I can get inside you,” he grumbles.

I place one last open kiss on the tip before I obey and he watches me with a heavy gaze. He fists his length and gives himself two slow strokes before he kneels on the bed and climbs over me. He guides himself to my centre and plunges in on one deep thrust.

“Oh, God, I’ve missed this,” I gasp. “I’ve missed you.”

“Me too, freckles,” he says, leaning down and fusing his lips to mine. We kiss long and deep as my body takes him all the way in before he begins to move slowly.

My hips rock into his, grinding shamelessly in a rhythm that’s all our own. I grip his shoulders, bending one knee up, trying to take him deeper. I can’t think past my need. To be taken, to be his, to be us.

“Don’t stop,” I gasp. “I love you Sebastian, don’t stop.”

The words tumble from my lips, laced with pleasure as I begin to feel myself tighten around him, the tension in my body coming in waves before I finally let go and come apart beneath him.

“Fucking hell,” he groans, stiffening above me and filling me with his own release.

My limbs feel weightless as he slows, our bodies molded together in a mess of sticky sweat. I catch my breath and place my palms on either side of his face, urging him to look at me. Sated and sexy, he lazily kisses my lips and when he pulls back I keep my hands where they are.

“I love you, Sebastian,” I say.

“I love you too, Anna.”

Hours later, after we’ve made love twice more and eaten half my cake right out of the pan, we lie in bed, Sebastian wrapped protectively around me. When the steady rise and fall of his chest begins to lull me to sleep I realize that all I ever used to want was a fairy tale. I wanted an idea, a fantasy. But what I’ve found is so much more than that.

It’s unexpected, it’s real and it belongs to us.