Ava
Chapter 18
Meet me at eleven in the stables. I owe you a date at the Melon Berry picnic.
Garr
My heart skipped as I pressed my lips together. Not only was I excited to get out of this mundane castle—and sneaking out was half the fun—but my giddiness was aimed toward him. I craved more of the fluttery reaction Garrett made me feel, but if I stayed too close, something other than my skin would melt. And that organ was off limits for now.
I rang for Lucy and Miranda, then walked to my oak ambry to fetch my riding pants and a shirt.
“Yes, Your Grace?” Lucy greeted a few minutes later, her blonde hair disheveled as she strode in my bedroom. She straightened her pink gown and stood still, waiting for my response.
“Are you all right?” I asked with furrowed brows. Lucy walked to me, taking my clothes from my hands, giving me a small grin.
“Quite all right.” She laid my pants out on my comforter. “Were you going out for a midnight ride?”
“Something like that.” I sauntered toward her and leaned against one of the wooden bed poles. I crossed my arms with a smirk. “You were with Dominic, weren’t you?” My voice was soft. I didn’t mind that she hid away for secret little kisses and alone time. I envied it, in a way.
“Of course not,” she answered too quickly, busying herself with laying out my shirt and smoothing it over with her hands.
“You know I don’t mind, don’t you?” She nodded, but kept silent. “Then why are you keeping it a secret from me?”
Lucy glanced at me before her eyes lowered.
“Aubrey McYink was sent back to her family in disgrace when Lady Chitwood told her family that she had intimate relations with a man.”
Dropping my arms to my sides, I huffed. “And what business is that of hers?”
“She was Lady Chitwood’s lady-in-waiting.”
I shrugged. “And?”
Lucy stood straight and looked at me. “And I can’t go back to my family. My father is abusive, and my mother is a fool.”
I placed a hand on her shoulder, hurt that she compared me to Sophia Chitwood.
“I would never do that to you, Lucy. It’s your life to live, not mine to rule.”
Lucy bowed her head. “I know, my Lady. It’s just a little scary is all.”
I pulled her into a small hug, not wanting to push her further. “You needn’t fear me. You probably have more secrets on me than I care to know about.” Lucy chuckled, pulling away from me.
“I would never betray your trust,” she replied with a small grin.
I returned it. “Good. Could you prove it to me by getting me a hat?”
“A hat, my Lady?” Lucy repeated, raising her brow.
“And I need my hair pulled up under it, can you manage that?”
Lucy held up a finger and started for the door. “I’ll be back in a moment.”
Taking a deep breath, I walked to my long mirror hanging alongside my closet. Turning from side to side, I examined my figure. I groaned inwardly. I’d have to strap down my breasts and wear a larger shirt to hide my hips. Pulling my hair back, I imagined how to pin it to keep strands of hair falling from the hat I was going to wear. My hair was long and thick—too thick. Opening my vanity drawer, I took out a handful of hair pins. It didn’t need to be neat, just out of the way. Playing with it, I thought of what awaited me. Normal people at a regular party; no fancy dresses or hours of plastering makeup and hair in a specific way. It sounded liberating, casual even.
Grabbing a handkerchief, I started wiping away my blush, pink lip powder, and black eye pencil from my eyes, making my face feel light and airy. Looking back up at the mirror, with my hair half pinned up, I winced. My freckles brightened my cheeks without the blush, but if I had my hair pulled away, I might be able to pull this off.
Tonight was for me.
Tonight, I was going to be reckless.
Tonight, Ava Barlow didn’t exist.
∞∞∞
“I hope I didn’t keep you waiting long,” I greeted, striding toward him, feeling the soft dirt under my riding boots. “I had to dodge a few people. I almost ran into George.”
“That would have been”—his eyes inched across my body, lingering over my hips and breasts as a small smile spread across his deviously handsome face—“a disaster.”
A blush blazed on my face. “Are you ready to leave?” I started fidgeting with my fingers, and he nodded. “Great.”
Garrett already had our horses saddled and outside the barn, as he held both reins. He raised his hand for me to take my set, and I strolled to grab my horse, his gaze studying every movement of mine. I shivered, not because of the chill night air, but because I felt naked under his fixed stare.
He waited for me to mount my horse before ascending his and we began our expedition. We rode in silence, which normally wouldn’t bother me, but it did right now. It was as though it muted any intelligent conversation that I could be having with him right now, and it didn’t even have to be that. It could be casual or mundane, anything but curbed and restrained. As I tried to focus on something clever to talk about, besides the weather and his day, he broke through my tongue-tied thoughts.
“Where did you get the clothes?”
I looked at Garrett, who kept his gaze on the grassy field that swayed with the wind ahead of us. The moon lit the landscape, making it a picture-perfect night; the grass looked blueish instead of green, lighting the way to our destination. A light fog hovered over the ground, making the field look magical.
“My lady found them for me. Not quite sure where.”
When he didn’t respond, I glanced down at myself. My breasts were taped down, to keep my boyish appearance, and my hair was braided, under a hat. With no blush, I probably looked like a sixteen-year-old male.
Damn him for making me feel nervous.
To my chagrin, it only took us a short while to get into town, where the celebration was already in full participation. The music was clamorous, with people bustling amongst each other. Colored lanterns hung around the dance floor, and small fires were lit, surrounded by people warming their hands and drinking their spirits, laughing and talking. Couples danced in unison, hand in hand, crouching to go under another couple’s joined arms, smiling and singing as they enjoyed the dance.
We handed off our horses to a gentleman keeping all the animals together as Garrett handed him a few coins. He guided me through the crowd, keeping close by my side, as I took everything in; the long tables of food, the smell of spiced chicken cooked over an open fire, and children hiding under the tables, reaching blindly for sweets. It felt extraordinary, so free and content, and my heart fluttered in my chest, a smile resting on my face. No one knew my name, or who I was.
Turning to Garrett, I paused. He was studying the crowd, looking from one man to a group of them eating and laughing, his eyes narrowed and focused. Did the man have any fun without being a guard dog?
“Garr.”
He didn’t break his observation of the crowd. “Hm?”
Waiting to see if he would look at me, I finally rolled my eyes, halting mid-step. Garrett continued, peering to his left then his right. I crossed my arms; I’d stay put here until pensive Garrett figured out that I wasn’t at his side. It didn’t take but another second before he stood on his tiptoes, scanning over the crowd. He almost barreled into me when he turned around to stalk through the crowd. The look of pure worry in his eyes melted my heart.
“Hello,” I greeted, welcoming him back to my conversation. He exhaled a deep breath, closing his eyes. His hand came up to his forehead, rubbing it with his thumb and index finger.
“Are you trying to give me a heart attack, Ava?” The sound of my actual name coming from him told me he was agitated. And I wasn’t the least bit sorry.
I lifted a brow. “Were you going to stand guard all night, or try to have a bit of fun?”
“We just got here.”
“Yes, and you couldn’t look more obvious by staring daggers at everyone.”
“I wasn’t—” I crossed my arms, and he sighed. “All right, fine.” He unbuttoned the top bottom of his shirt, his dark chest hair peeking out. My jaw unhitched a little, as my gaze trailed his smooth neck, stubbly chin, and piercing blue eyes. “Better?”
I cleared my throat. “Much...much better.” He took a step closer, and my breath choked in its normal rhythm. The closed distance brought the intensity of his body, my feet wanting to move and regain my air supply, but my mind was curious of what this man could do to me. Besides the lack of functioning of half my body.
“Avie,” he whispered over my head. Our eyes locked, his blue ones holding me hostage. “I’m starving. Can we eat?”
I swallowed. “Of course.” My hands relaxed from their clenched state, disappointment washing over me that our current proximity had no effect on him.
A roar of fire made me jump closer to him, his hands immediately coming to my elbows. “Come here.” Maneuvering to squeeze us into a spot, I discovered the noise was coming from a shirtless group of men eating fire and blowing it out of their mouths. They held short torches, waving them around in circles, exciting the circled crowd around them.
“This is amazing,” I said in awe, my eyes taking each of them in, watching each one try a different trick.
“Aruna has men who spit fire while spinning upside down off the ceiling,” Garrett chimed, crossing his arms.
“The ceiling? How don’t they burn themselves?” The other side of the crowd slightly parted, allowing a short man to enter the middle of the circle. He jumped, flipping himself in the air, landing on his feet gracefully. Grabbing the shoulders of another entertainer, the short man leapt on his shoulders with his knees, bringing himself to stand. The people cheered and clapped while he balanced himself, taking another torch from his partner. Each of them spit out more fire, while the rest of the them performed flips and cartwheels. The spectacle was marvelous; I’d never seen anything like it.
The feel of a familiar hand landed on my back. “Having fun yet?”
I nodded, my focus not able to pry itself away. He cupped my hand, tugging me lightly.
Following his lead, we squeezed through the crowd; couples so packed together that I started to feel a little claustrophobic. Bodies brushed against mine and the only space to breathe was the air above me. Garrett stopped, finding a spot that wasn’t as congested, and turned to face me.
“Dance with me?” A small grin lit up his face, his cheekbones prominently showing on his handsome face that should be praised by every single creature.
“I thought you were hungry,” I teased.
“Food can wait,” he replied. Holding out his hand for me to take, I accepted, and he immediately pulled me closer to him. Taking both my arms, he brought them up to his neck. “There are no rules or propriety among the townspeople. You dance however you like.”
I glanced around, needing something else to do. I didn’t want to stare at him, like I had lost my damn mind, nor did I want to display any nervousness on my part. Noting other couples near us, women laid their heads on their partner’s shoulder while others had men’s hands much lower.
A sadness came over me. Being killed for something so piddling was cruel. The loss he must had felt made my stomach plunge.
My lips quirked. “Whores. Don’t tell me you don’t know of them.” Garrett spun me around once, bringing me closer. Our bodies were so close together.
Garrett grinned, biting his lower lip. “No gentleman makes a female blush on purpose.” His voice was laced in such tantalizing humor, he was probably enjoying my cheeks turn red every other sentence.
Garrett cupped my face with one hand, bringing it closer to his. “I guess not.”
With no hesitation, his lips found mine. The initial shock threw me, my body warming to the feel of him taking what he wanted. His lips were soft, and as he drank in our kiss slowly and gently, one of his arms tightened around me while the other brushed back strands of hair from my face. His fingers laced between the strands, settling on the back of my head, while a silky groan mingled between us. My legs felt numb when his mouth left mine for a brief moment, his head tilting to the other side, as he deepened the kiss.
“That was before I got to kiss the intoxicating Miss Avie Barlow,” he murmured. He squeezed my hands and brought one up to his lips. It was the softness of his eyes that made my heart skip out of his normal rhythm, which made the moment inaudible to everything around me.
“Am I making you uncomfortable?” Garrett asked, a frown manifesting on his face.
“I can take care of myself.”
Garrett’s face softened. His calloused hand stroked my cheek before cupping my chin. “You’d tell me, right?”
He already had, and I was eating out of the palm of his hand. I took a step back, needing to gain some self-restraint. The pull from him was too strong. It had the means to change me, revise any plans I made for my future, and falling for Garrett Cranfield wasn’t part of it. I wasn’t an expert at men, but I’d seen women fall from their overpowering need for a man. It wasn’t that I cared about the gossips; it was because I was scared of losing my heart, body, and soul to a man who knew how to make me weak with one touch.