I’ve been awake for hours. Long enough to know we reached our destination. I’ve been lying here trying to figure out how I’m going to explain the bruises, or better yet how to hide them.
One thing I do know is that I can’t tell him. I can’t tell anyone. I will not have the demise of Soul Serenade on my hands. Those four men have worked hard to get where they are, and I’m not going to ruin it for them. Besides, nothing happened. I just need to be more aware of my surroundings, make sure I’m not alone. It’s a solid plan. Now if I could just decide on what to do with the bruises.
Cole shifts behind me and I know I’m running out of time. Luckily, it’s been cooling off, so I could get away with a long-sleeve T-shirt. I’ll make sure it’s my Soul Serenade shirt. I can use the “I don’t feel well” card and the excuse that I’m cold. I can pull that off.
What I’m really struggling with is Cole. How am I going to keep him from seeing them? I run through the tour schedule in my mind, and luckily, we don’t have any breaks where we can get a room for the night. That will help. No way could I get away with staying covered if we had a room to ourselves. He would know without a doubt that I’m hiding something.
Cole’s hand that has been under my shirt—well, his shirt—all night snakes up toward my chest. “Morning, sweets. How you feeling?” his sleep-laced voices asks as he palms my breast.
Any other day, I would be doing whatever I could in this cramped space to give him more of me, to see and to touch more of him. Not today. Today, I pretend to be sick.
“I’m just feeling blah, I guess. Nothing hurts, just cold,” I lie, burrowing into the covers to make it more believable. I’m going to hell for this. I either lie to the man I love, or tell him the truth and ruin what he and his band have busted their asses for. There is no good ending to either solution, so I’m just going to hold onto him. Cherish every touch, every kiss and pray that fuck-stick Wilson doesn’t spill. Surely, he’s smarter than that, right?
“Can I do anything?”
“I think I just need to rest.” Another lie falling from my lips.
“Are you hungry?” He reaches up to the small shelf above and grabs his phone. “I can make you some breakfast.”
“You cook?”
He laughs. “I was thinking like a toasted bagel.”
“Okay, Mr. Hampton. Dazzle me with your toasting skills.”
“Oh, don’t you worry.”
I roll over slowly to face him. I bite my tongue when I hit my arm on the side of the bus. Shit, that hurts!
“You haven’t seen anything until you’ve seen me spread cream cheese.” He winks.
Cocky ass.
“Uh-huh. Let me up, crazy man, I have to pee.”
Sweet Cole returns as he kisses my forehead before rolling out of the bunk.
I rush past him and into the small bathroom, locking the door. Once I’ve handled my business, I push back my sleeves to wash my hands and dark purple bruises cover my arms.
Shit.
I do bruise easily, but these look like I’ve been beaten. You can see exactly where his fingers were. I swallow the lump in my throat, knowing I’m lucky he didn’t take it further. The look in his eyes said he wanted to. I have never been so grateful for the interruption of voices in my life.
A single tear slides down my cheek as I think about lying to Cole, to Logan and the rest of the guys. I hate Wilson and the position he’s put me in. I hate that I really, truly, finally believe that what Cole wants is more than just to get his dick wet and that I’m the one who could screw it all up. I avoided him thinking he would use me and here I am being the liar in the relationship.
“You okay in there, sweets?” Cole lightly knocks on the door.
I wipe my face and clear my throat. “Yeah, just washing my hands.”
When I make it to the living area, Cole is already eating his bagel. Mine sits on a plate next to him.
“You, okay?”
“Yeah, just moving slow.”
“Eat and we can go lie back down. I don’t have to be at sound check for a few hours.”
“You don’t have to wait around with me, Cole. I’m sure you have things to do today. You guys are always busy on show days.”
The bagel he’s holding stops just before he takes a bite. Slowly, he places it back on the paper plate. That same hand cups my cheek. “You. You are what’s important. I don’t want to be anywhere but here. I can blow off the radio interview. We’ve all done it a time or two, claiming other obligations. The only thing I won’t do, unless it’s an emergency, is bail on the show. The guys depend on me. Please don’t take that the wrong way, but it’s my job.”
“Never. This is your career, Cole. I understand the sacrifices that you have to make.”
“And you. As my girlfriend, there will sacrifices that you will have to make as well. Spending the holidays on the road, possibly missed birthdays or anniversaries.”
I know all too well about sacrifices. I take a drink of my orange juice, giving myself time to shake off the memories of last night. “Sounds like a long-term thing.” I’m baiting him, but I just can’t help it. I don’t want to push him to talk about the future, but teasing I can do. Besides, the conversation needs to change from talking about sacrifices.
That I’m living.
Leaning in, he kisses me softly. “I love you. That’s long-term, sweets,” he says, going back to his breakfast.
Be still my heart. Cole Hampton, rocker extraordinaire, is lethal. He should come with a warning label. No wonder Logan fell as hard as she did. I mean, I watched her and Kacen and I could see the connection. Cole and his man bun, his cocky attitude and his words . . . I’m like putty in his hands.
“Where is everyone?” I ask him.
“Gavin and Tristan are sleeping. I assume Kacen and Logan are as well.”
“What time is it?”
“Seven.”
Damn! My worry has us up early. “I’m sorry I woke you. You should go back to bed.”
“Finish your breakfast and we’ll go lie down for a few hours.” He shoves the last bite—or rather half of his bagel—into his mouth.
I manage to eat one half and slide the other over to him. He finishes it off in a couple of big bites while I throw our trash away. “I’m going to lie down,” I tell him.
“I’m going to grab a quick shower before everyone gets up. I’ll be there in a minute.”
Crawling back into the bottom bunk, I burrow under the covers. It’s a dreary day, which is good—it fits my mood. I hear the door to Kacen and Logan’s room open. I wish I could talk to her about this, but I don’t want to risk her telling Kacen and besides that, she doesn’t need the stress. It’s not good for her or the baby.
I hear Cole greet them. “Listen, man. Stacy still isn’t feeling well. I’m going to skip the radio spot so I can stay with her. I’ll be at sound check.”
“Need anything?” Kacen asks.
“Nah, just want to be there for her, you know?”
“Cole, thank you,” Logan says.
“For?”
“Taking care of her. She deserves someone like you. Fiercely protective and caring all at the same time.”
“I love her,” is his simple reply.
I can only imagine what Logan’s face looks like. I’m sure she’s grinning like a damn fool right now.
Cole slowly pulls back the curtain and crawls in next to me. He doesn’t say a word as he tucks me in close, my back to his front. There is nothing like his strong arms wrapped around me. He makes it better, makes everything better.
A few hours later, I wake up sweating. Cole and all of his muscles throw off the heat. Not to mention the blanket and his sweatshirt I’m wearing.
“Feeling any better?” His voice startles me.
“How long have you been awake?”
“About an hour or so.”
“You’ve just been watching me sleep?”
“Yeah.” He brushes my wild hair from my eyes. “It’s suddenly one of my favorite things to do.”
“When is sound check?”
“I need to be leaving. I was trying to wait as long as I could to wake you up. Logan and the guys are already there. I told them I would meet them.”
“Go! They’re waiting on you.” I push on him, but he doesn’t move.
“You going to be okay here? I can wait until you’re ready to come with me.”
“Yes, I’ll be fine. I’m going to take a shower and just relax. Maybe read a little.”
“You think you’ll feel like coming to the show?” I can hear the hope in his voice.
“Yes.” I kiss his chin. “I have to keep the groupies away from my man.”
Leaning over, he captures my lips with his. “Say it again,” he breathes.
“I have to keep the groupies away.”
“No, the other part.” He kisses me again.
“Oh, you mean ‘my man’? Yeah, Tristan needs the extra coverage.” I can see the fire in his eyes.
“Mine,” he declares as he kisses me hard.
His hand snakes under the sweatshirt I’m wearing and that’s when I remember—I can’t get naked with him, not yet. I need to stop this. “Go, I have to make myself rock star-girlfriend material.”
“You’re fucking beautiful right here, right now. I would walk off this bus with you on my arm and be damn fucking honored that it’s you.”
“I love you, Cole Hampton. Now, go. I’ll be here when you get back.”
With one last kiss, he’s gone. I exhale in relief. Since I can get ready without anyone here, there is less of a chance of them seeing what I’m hiding.