Alone in the dark. The place I never want to be. Usually Caleb’s around. And if he’s not, then I’m at school working. Keeping busy. And even when I’m at home, I don’t feel alone. But here, in this hospital, with all the strange voices and sounds, I’m terrified. And this is a feeling I don’t like, especially combined with the pain that is creeping back into my lower stomach.

The nurse, Mindy, helps me from the chair just as another contraction hits. I lose my footing and almost fall. Luckily, this Mindy person is quick and catches me as she eases my body back into the chair.

“I got you, hon.” Her voice is soft and sweet. Not exactly what the raging bitch inside of me wants to hear. When the pain hits, I turn into a raging screaming demon. I become confrontational and want to argue with someone. Anyone. But, I guess there is no need to piss off the people who have the medication to help with said pain.

“You okay, now? Let’s try this again,” she chimes.

I scoot to the edge of the chair and Mindy grabs my forearms. I slowly stand and immediately a surge of water escapes me. What the hell?

“Shit! I think my water just broke,” I tell the nurse.

“Yes, I believe you’re right.” She maneuvers me back onto the bed. I stretch my arms out until my hands feel the softness of the sheets. It’s only then that I allow my body to gradually ease onto the mattress. Then Mindy’s gone—she’s moving things around, opening and closing what I assume to be cabinets, or maybe drawers. I fucking hate this. Where is Caleb? Tears form in my eyes, but I hold onto them. I’m not weak, but for the first time since I lost my sight, I’m scared—truly terrified. And it pisses me off because it shows me how much I’ve come to depend on Caleb. If he ever left me, I’d be…I shake my head, wishing that thought away.

“Henley, I’m about to help you undress and put on a gown. Then I’m going to hook you up to a monitor so we can listen to your baby’s heartbeat, okay?” Nurse Mindy speaks slowly, clearly, and loudly—like she thinks I’m deaf. I want to scream and tell her, “I can fucking hear you, bitch.” I’ve learned over the course of the last couple of years that people tend to associate me being blind with me being hard of hearing and stupid. I’m neither.

“Sure,” I tell her as she helps me undress. Once the gown is on and the monitor is secure, I feel better. The sound of my little one’s heart echoing through the room is all I need to hear. I’m no longer alone. He or she is here and has been the entire time. I smile at that thought.

The mattress dips slightly, so I’m alerted that someone is sitting next to me. Whoever it is smells of soap—hospital grade soap to be exact. It must be a nurse. Not Mindy, because she has more of a musky smell. Unfortunately, my sense of smell is incredible because I use it as my eyes most of the time.

“Hi, Henley.” The voice is young and cheerful. “I’m Sierra, one of the nurses who will be taking care of you this morning. I wanted to let you know what I’m about to do, so it won’t frighten you.”

I nod slowly. Her voice is so soothing and calming, and it relaxes me.

“First, I’m going to start an IV to give you fluids and medications.” She gently takes my right hand in hers. Her skin is warm and comforting just like her voice. She’s young, I can tell. She hasn’t had enough years to be tarnished by this cruel old world.

“Okay, Sierra, thank you.” I smile before bringing my left hand to my face. I run my fingers along the arm of my glasses to be sure everything is secure. I talked to Dr. Walters early on during this pregnancy and he assured me that no one would take my dark shades off during delivery. The thought of anyone seeing me without them causes tension to shoot up my spine, just in time for another fucking contraction.

“Shit!” I scream. Sierra immediately releases my hand, waiting for it to pass. Her presence is still near, she’s just no longer touching me.

Once it passes, she secures my hand in hers again. “Are you okay now?” she asks.

“For the moment,” I tell her.

She shifts her weight around on the mattress before I feel a slight sting on the top of my hand. The needle stick, I presume, but it doesn’t hurt. At least not like the pain I’ve been experiencing throughout the last couple of hours.

“IV is in,” Sierra tells me while lowering my hand onto the mattress. “Now I’m going to check your cervix for dilation.”

I simply nod and relax, because I know that the less stress I allow myself to feel, the better off the baby and I will be.

Now she’s between my legs with a gloved hand, poking and prodding until she’s happy with what she discovers. Once she’s gone from down there, I quickly pull my legs together and adjust them until they’re securely closed.

“Four centimeters,” Sierra confirms to someone—probably Mindy—who is typing the numbers into a computer, or so I assume because I hear click after click after click across a keyboard.

The air shifts in the room, and a gush of a woodsy scent fills my nose. He’s here.

“Caleb,” I reach for him before he makes it to the bed.

“I’m here, baby. And I promise I won’t leave again. Everything okay?” he asks, running his fingers through my hair.

I lean into him and all is right in my world again.