Chapter Fifteen

Belle

The collar once felt heavy in my hands. It felt like an insult and a burden the first time he gave it to me… or, well, tried to give it to me. Now it was different. After last night, I at least knew he wanted us to continue as Dom/sub when we were home. It wasn’t everything I wanted. Not even close. I wanted the entire fairytale, the hearts and flowers, the romance that rocked the ages. There were these connections I felt with him, these moments that stole my breath away, and that’s what I wanted to keep feeling with him. That’s what I needed to keep having with him. I just wasn’t sure if that was on the table now. But the collar was a start, a promise of a bond and a relationship between us, a promise of everything we could have together.

Something that I’d hated so much only a few weeks ago now brought tears to my eyes. The beauty shone through it from the diamonds adorning it to the beautiful blue sapphires that dotted it as well. My fingers ran over the cool stones, and I was back in the playroom with Drake, back to last night with him pounding into me and filling me with his seed.

I almost wished I wasn’t on the pill.

Crazy though it was, I wanted to see so much together, to have a future and a family. He was slowly and obviously becoming everything I ever wanted.

But it wasn’t enough if all I was to him was a submissive, even a favorite one.

I wanted more.

Sighing, I slipped the collar on my throat and lay back in bed. “God, what am I going to do?”

There was a shrill ring and I groaned, realizing that my Skype was going off. I rushed to the desk and flipped open the computer. I never knew if there could be a possible emergency with Mom. She seemed to be responsive to her new treatments, but I’d seen that before with the chemo. Everything was hopeful and working well until it wasn’t. I was scared this might be the case again. When I answered the call, I tried to hide my frustration when I realized that it was my sister looking back at me. Carol’s calls were becoming more and more short-tempered lately. She was mad that I hadn’t closed the gap on the other fifteen-cents-on-the-dollar in the deal. But there was something else there, something frantic beneath her calls that I couldn’t quite place and wasn’t sure I wanted to.

“I… hey,” I said, trying to be polite.

Carol’s eyes narrowed to slit and when she spoke, her tone was glacial. “What the hell are you wearing?”

My eyes went wide and my hands flew to my neck. Sick realization creeping over me as I felt the cool stones against my palms. Shit, I left the collar on! “I… I can explain.”

Carol shook her head. “Oh, I can put the pieces together for myself. You aren’t exactly discrete. Let’s see, not only have you been fucking your way to a deal with McManus—one that’s still benefitting him more than us—but you’ve been doing it kinky style. Wow, sis, I’m shocked. I honestly didn’t think you had it in you. I thought you were better than that.”

I swallowed hard even as tears poured down my cheeks. “It’s not like that. I mean, I can explain.”

“That you’re the holier than thou one? That you’re Daddy’s little snowflake, but you’ll get down and dirty when it matters? I mean, he thinks you’re not as ruthless as me. That’s why he likes you better.”

“Dad doesn’t like either of us better than the other. Where is this even coming from?’

Carol let out a harsh bark of laughter. “Dad’s always played favorites. Don’t even pretend. He has a favorite, and it’s always been you. For a long time, I thought you deserved it, sis, but you’re acting like a common whore!” She paused and eyed my necklace. “Actually, you’re acting like someone a lot more specialized than that. So I guess props there.”

I tried to take off the collar quickly but my hands were shaking too badly to get a good grip on the clasp. “I’m not a whore!”

“You’re his whore, his little piece on the side. He has a damn dog collar on your neck. It might have diamonds on it, but don’t pretend you’re not sleeping with him to get whatever you want out of the deal.”

“I’m working for us!” I shouted, leaping to my feet. “I’m working for this family. What happened with me and Drake was unexpected.”

“Oh, I’ll say.”

“It was unexpected but it wasn’t part of the deal. I’ve been working my ass off every day at the table to try and get us what we want but you have to admit he has a point. The company’s ruined and even sixty-five cents on the dollar is more than we ever could have hoped for, especially when no other agency can even be bothered to call us back. He’s the only game in town.”

Carol’s face twisted up into a grimace. “I can see you’ve been playing games. You do whatever you have to in order to close the deal, I can see that now. I don’t even care. Dad’s fretting every day over it and Mom’s sick, and you’re off fucking a billionaire and wearing diamonds. I can see how seriously you’re taking everything.”

“I am! Mom’s the only thing I think about.”

“Doesn’t look like it from here,” she said, before turning off the call and leaving me staring at the blank screen.

I cried then, great huge sobs that tore through my insides. I couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe. I just curled into my bed and cried with the collar still thick around my throat.