Chapter 7
Wild Ones Tip #72
Know the brand of crazy you’re dealing with. It could save your balls. Or your vagina lips.
LILAH
I’m four beers in when I consider smashing Lindy’s face in with the empty bottles beside me or cutting off her vagina lips with the broken glass.
For the past three years, at these little gatherings, I was one of maybe three women here. The women didn’t want to come to these things, and Aunt Penny made me attend.
Hell, not even Delaney would come, even when I begged her, because she found it boring. Oh, but she’s here tonight.
My brothers were banned pretty often from Aunt Penny’s events, which put me on my own. Over those years, Benson and I became friends, and it was an unspoken arrangement that we’d hang out together to endure these things as a team.
Now Benson is drinking with Paul—who I didn’t recognize without his bushy red beard—while Lindy Perkins stands right up against him like I usually do. I never realized before today how much we touch.
But now that I see another woman touching him, I can’t help but feel territorial.
And I have no right.
Usually he’s shy and quiet. Or just quiet. Not tonight. His confidence is buzzing. It’s a really good look on him.
I just assumed he’d still be the same Benson even with an extra shot of confidence.
Benson looks up, catching me looking at him, and I cut my gaze away just as Liam walks toward me, a smile playing on his lips.
“There’s a face I recognize,” he says in relief. “With all these beards gone, I feel like I have to meet everyone all over again.”
I force a smile as he takes the empty seat next to me. I turn my body to fully face him, straddling the picnic table bench, so that I can no longer see Lindy touching Benson. The way I’m usually touching him.
Because they’re not friends and we are.
Time for a new friend, it seems. Benson wants to be shared, and I can’t stand the gnawing, unprecedented jealousy I’m fighting.
I’m being ridiculous. I can’t stop being his friend even if he does get a girlfriend. I’ll just have to make her life hell—simple task for a girl like me—until she’s gone.
There. Plan made. Problem solved.
“Are you relieved you’re no longer the only eligible bachelor in Tomahawk?” I muse.
His grin grows. “Yeah. Very. I’m not big on a lot of attention. Didn’t expect that in a town so small.”
“It’ll calm down now, and we’ll be a normal bunch before you know it.”
As if summoned by that promise, there’s suddenly a shrill squeal, and one of my brothers is soaring through the air over our heads, his feet running on air. Hale lands in the lake so hard the water splashes straight up like a cannon just fired from beneath it.
I turn to see the rubber bungie mess behind me that just launched him.
“You idiots griped about that water, and you build that?” I ask, gesturing to the ludicrous contraption that looks like they stole parts of a trampoline to assemble that thing.
Killian grins at me, as Hale hoots from the water, climbing out.
“Couldn’t resist. Always wanted to try this!” Hale adds.
I shake my head, and I look back over to Liam to find him laughing. “Yeah. Terribly boring.”
“Well, my brothers don’t count. They have a tendency to be anything but boring. But it usually drives you insane instead of making you laugh. Just wait until they let bugs invade your panties.”
It’s not boring at all in Tomahawk when you live close to a corner of Wild Ones, but I don’t bother telling him that. He’s still new.
His eyebrows go up at the panty remark, and I laugh to myself while shaking my head.
Hale drops another beer off in my hand as he drips cool water everywhere on his way by, and I watch him suspiciously.
“What’s that look for?” Liam asks, curious.
“He’s trying to get me drunk. Which makes me worry about the reasons as to why. Last time they got me drunk, I ended up in a canoe and woke up all the way around the double bend of the lake. My arms felt like they were going to fall off by the time I managed to paddle home.”
He snorts, shaking his head as laughter creeps out.
“I thought your aunt said she didn’t allow them over here,” he says through his chuckles.
“Beardless night is apparently the exception. I’m sure she’ll regret that before the night is over.”
“Gotcha. So a canoe, huh?” he asks, apparently wanting me to continue.
“That canoe trip took me past two of the other three corners, and I got shot with paintballs when I passed the Malone corner.”
“This odd shaped lake has only four corners?” he asks.
“Metaphorical corners. Four of them. There are probably really like forty literal corners. The wildest of the Wild Ones—”
“Wild Ones?” he asks, sitting up straighter, suddenly very interested.
I’m not sure why that rouses his interest so much, but I’m tipsy enough to continue running my mouth about Tomahawk’s system of crazy. Liam is growing on me, since he seems genuine and nice enough.
“Yes. The Wild Ones are put on very different parts of the lake to help break up some of the crazy. Vincents—my brothers and I—are on this end. Malones are on another ‘corner,’ Nickels are on another, and the final are the Wilders.”
“Wilders? You’re serious?” he asks incredulously.
I nod. “True to their name, they’re even worse than us, and that’s saying a lot, because…have you met my brothers?”
He laughs to himself. “I had no idea there was a political system on who was the wildest.”
“Yep. And the crazy scale is often adjusting to accommodate us all. My dad moved out here when he was younger, and raised the Vincent name up to full-blown heathen status with my mother at his side. My brothers and I have carried on the tradition. My aunt and uncle are only guilty by association.”
“So you’ve always lived here?”
I nod. “Mostly. Other than the one year of graphic design school. I don’t have a degree, but I learned all I needed to get my business started, and I make good money. Online, that is. Not so much here.”
“Doing what?” he asks, genuinely interested.
“Book cover design. Website design. Logo design. Anything in need of a graphic designer really.”
He flashes that smile again.
“And what about your parents?”
I go a little still, then recover quickly. “They died in a car accident when I was fifteen,” I say, clearing my throat. His face is instantly coated in remorse. “They were going to drive down to Seattle for their anniversary. Black ice on the road caught them by surprise. But at least they had each other when they died. One could have never survived without the other.”
He blows out a long, regretful breath.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”
“We moved on. It’s fine. You’re not dredging up memories I can’t face. We’ve faced all of it head on with Aunt Penny and Uncle Bill. I’m just not used to someone not knowing the story.”
I glance over my shoulder to see Delaney is now talking to Benson, even though he looks less chipper now than he did before. His eyes are on me, and I offer a tight smile.
Delaney would back off immediately if I said something, but why bother? If Benson wants to have fun with other women and ignore me—the girl who has been hanging with him, beard and all, for the past few years—then he’s allowed to do that.
I refocus my attention on Liam as he leans back, running a hand through his blond hair.
“You said Malones were one of these wild families?” he asks.
“Yeah. You’ve heard of them?”
He shrugs, a small, secretive smile tugging at his lips. “Maybe. Are you enemies or something?”
“No. No Wild Ones are enemies to each other. It’s not like that. My best girl friend is a Malone. Her dad and cousins like to shoot us with paintballs when they spot us on the water, because my brothers accidentally blew up their dock last summer.”
He chokes on his beer. “How do you accidentally blow up a dock?”
“Pipe bomb. They were trying to blow a big stump out of the water, but Hale tripped, and the bomb flew out of his hand. It caught the edge of the dock just as it went off. No one was hurt, but they still hold a silly grudge.”
He laughs harder, as though he’s not believing this. It’s a true story. Not even one of the most unbelievable either.
“They rebuilt the dock to be even better than it was, but a Vincent still gets shot with a paintball if they get anywhere near that dock now.”
“Damn,” he says on a chuckle, then looks around and takes a deep breath, silence falling over us comfortably.
“Never was able to just relax like this in LA. I almost moved to Seattle for a while,” he finally says.
“What changed your mind?” I ask.
“The rain,” he answers without hesitation, to which I laugh.
“The rain can be fierce here, too. We’ve just got a small, semi-dry spell before it starts back up near the end of summer.”
He nods, still smiling as he stares out at the lake. More boats are moving this way, but despite the small disturbance, it’s still peaceful.
“I’m okay with the rain now,” he says softly.
“Why’s that?” I ask, leaning up on the picnic table and bracing my head with my hand.
“The rain forces me to slow down, and now I actually want to slow down. Life has a way of changing you. And I finally realized one day that I had no real friends, my job was controlling my life, I was moving at the speed of light, yet staying in the same stagnant spot, and my money brought about some of the worst of humanity disguised as the best. The biggest eye-opener was when I got hurt in a sky-diving accident, and barely managed to walk away with my life. Saved by pure dumb luck and one crazy girl.”
“What?” I ask, genuinely interested.
“The parachute malfunctioned and opened late. I still managed to slow my speed enough to land a little softer, and also had enough time to steer myself over water. I was banged up and suffered a broken leg instead of dying. A girl diving with us that day pulled me out before I could drown.”
My heart is actually racing as he turns to face me again.
“My family didn’t call to check on me. My so-called friends didn’t bother stopping by or calling, other than the few who feigned concern. Everything fun suddenly seemed so empty, because I realized no one really cared about me. Only one girl acted like she truly gave a damn, and I barely even knew her.”
“What was her name?”
He flashes me a grin.
“I’ll tell you soon. She’s actually the reason I decided to buy the cabin out here. This is her hometown.”
My jaw drops, and he winks at me.
“So that explains the total lack of interest in all things with a vagina. I sort of wondered if you were into men,” I say thoughtfully.
He barks out a laugh, and I smile as he shakes his head. “Nah. I’m still working up the courage to tell her I stalked her here. I haven’t seen her out yet, but in a place this small, it’s bound to happen sooner or later. I just didn’t expect everyone to be so spread out.”
I start to try to pry a name out of him again, when suddenly he’s smiling at something over my shoulder. “Hey, I’m Liam Harper.”
“I know. We’ve met multiple times now,” Benson says, his body moving in behind me on my seat at the picnic table.
His legs come up beside mine as he straddles the seat and me from behind. His hands rest on his legs, but just his proximity is having me swallow harder.
Liam looks confused for the barest second before his eyebrows hit his hairline. “Benson Nolans?”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake. I don’t look that different,” Benson groans.
“Yeah. Yeah, you do,” Liam says, and I tilt my head back on Benson’s chest to smile up at him.
He glares down at me, but his twitching lips betray him. Without thinking, I reach up, my fingers touching the side of his face. He goes stiff behind me, the humor in his eyes dying.
“I like being able to finally see a damn expression,” I tell him, even though I’m saying this upside down.
His smile returns as my fingers trace down the surprisingly soft remnants of his beard. It’s not wiry anymore; short like this, it feels like silk. Okay, not that soft, but definitely soft enough to feel inviting.
“Benson!” Delaney calls, then stops when she sees us.
She deflates almost instantly, and actually looks hurt for a brief second. I’ll explain to her later that Benson has been mine for three years, but I didn’t realize it until I woke up on top of him.
“Do not leave me alone with them,” Benson says quietly as I lower my hand, and I hear Liam start to laugh.
“Glad I came in at the end of this beard thing,” Liam says, causing Benson’s lips to twitch.
“You’re the one who was over there with them. I always hang out in this exact spot,” I point out, still looking up at Benson, who frowns down at me.
“I had to talk to Paul about importing some materials too big to drive on that rickety road behind my place. He’s the one with the barge. Then I had to listen to fifteen stories about random things before I could get away from him. You know how Paul is.”
And now I feel like I’ve been pouting for no reason.
I shrug, looking back over at Liam, who is staring at anything but us right now as he leans back on the picnic table.
Benson wouldn’t embarrass someone by shrugging them off, hence the reason Lindy and Delaney touching him didn’t get rebuffed. I still don’t like it. I’d rather him be an ass. I’m used to my brothers—they’d both be total assholes.
“I kind of miss my beard right now,” Benson grumbles when Lindy starts walking our way.
“I miss your beard too,” I say too quietly for him to hear.
No other women noticed him before I stupidly helped get that bad beard gone. Now it feels like I’m struggling to keep him to myself like I’ve done for the past three years.
“Lindy!” Aunt Penny yells before Lindy can reach us. “I need help with these desserts!”
Lindy stares at Benson for a beat, but he leans over like he’s hiding beside my face, his breath tickling my neck until I laugh, unable to stop it. His arms are strong around my waist as they tighten there.
I’ve never once gotten a death glare from another woman.
Not a damn one.
Until now.
I never should have ruined the beards.
“Coming,” Lindy says before spinning on a heel. “Maybe Lilah could help us too,” she adds so sweetly.
“Lilah always helps. She’s at all these gatherings. Thought maybe some of you new girls could pull your weight for the night,” Aunt Penny, the most awesome woman in the universe, says.
Benson snickers beside me as I laugh, and Liam even chuckles.
His eyes scan the place, and I secretly wonder who’s missing. It’s a small town. Sure, there are more single women than I realized initially, but I don’t know who he’d be looking for.
“Still don’t see her?” I ask.
He shakes his head, darting an apprehensive glance to Benson, and I realize he doesn’t want him knowing.
Got it.
“See who?” Benson asks.
“One of the girls here asked him for a three-way. He’s trying to avoid her,” I deadpan.
Liam’s lips twitch when Benson strangles on air, and I wink at him, letting him know I’m damn good at keeping secrets.
“I don’t want to stick around for fireworks. Think they’d get mad if we bailed early? All the buzz over my beard being gone is getting annoying,” Benson says close to my ear.
Butterflies. I’ve totally got butterflies. Because I’m fairly sure he’s telling me I’m coming with him, or at least assuming I am.
That’s normal, but tonight it seems a little different. I think. Or maybe I’m being a girl and seeing something that’s not there.
“Sure,” I say all too readily.
He stands, his arm sliding around my waist, and we both tell Liam bye before making our way toward the boat.
“Hey, Nolans. We need to talk to you,” Killian says, eyeing the hand Benson has on my waist.
Benson sighs. “Ignore them,” I tell him.
“Can’t. Just let me deal with it, then we’ll get out of here.”
Even though I try to stop him, he still goes to my brothers, who smirk at me. Fortunately, I’ve seen Benson rough both of them up in the past. Like that time they broke my bathroom window and I got stung by a bunch of bees as a result. Did I mention they broke my window with a limb that had a beehive on it?
Yeah. They were like Pooh Bear going for honey, and it didn’t end well for me when the limb and hive crashed through my bathroom window as I was showering.
The damn hive didn’t have any honey in it. It wasn’t honey bees.
Dick bags.
I know they had to know that.
Benson literally beat the shit out of them for a while before he made them go buy me comfort foods, hydrocortisone cream, and various other things while he patched up a temporary window and ordered me a new one.
That they paid for.
Why didn’t I think I liked him sooner?
I really should have just slept on top of his chest a year or two ago. Then I could have had him before he lost the beard and every other girl wanted him.
“So what’s up with that?” Delaney asks me, her tone guarded as she stares at Benson talking to my brothers.
He’s smirking. They’re not smiling at all.
“What’s up with what?” I ask as I turn to face her, playing dumb.
She narrows her eyes at me. “You’ve never acted interested in anyone, then I flirt half the day with him, competing with Lindy this entire time, and suddenly you’re cuddled up with him on the picnic table? Seriously, what gives?”
My smile slowly spreads. “You never saw him before he lost the bad beard, did you?”
She frowns. “What?”
“Delaney, that is maybe a little more affectionate than we’ve been in the past, but not much. We’re always touching, and always hanging out at these gatherings—not that you’re here to see that. I do his shopping on Tuesdays when I go into town. Benson and I have been friends for three years at least. I’ve even talked about him to you, and it’s like you never paid attention when I said his name. Nothing romantically related, but he came up in many conversations.”
Her entire face falls. “Oh,” she says, her face reddening.
The sun is starting to set now, and she fidgets awkwardly, focusing on where the massive ball of fire is sinking into the horizon.
“Makes sense why he was so uncomfortable with us. I thought it was just because he was shy and not used to the attention. Found it sort of cute or endearing. Now I feel stupid.”
I laugh lightly. “No need. I feel stupid for making the beards go away.”
Her eyes widen and she grabs my shoulders, shaking me a little. There’s my Delaney. “Don’t you ever say that again. This town finally, finally has men in it that don’t look like they crawled out of a gutter or survived an island where no one had to look at them for a decade. We should erect a statue of you to commemorate this momentous occasion that has forever changed Tomahawk for the better.”
We both dissolve into laughter, and Benson is suddenly back, his arm slipping around my waist and dragging me closer.
“What’d I miss?” he asks, though he feels a little stiff.
Delaney’s eyes twinkle with humor, and she winks at me. “Nothing. Just talking about sculptures. I’m going to go keep Paul company.”
She saunters away, and Benson relaxes against me. “Let’s go before someone else tries to stop us.”
“What’d my brothers say?” I ask as he pulls my hand.
“Threatened me with bodily harm if I took your virginity.”
I stumble over my own feet, and he laughs, turning to face me.
“I’m not a virgin,” I quickly tell him.
“I don’t think they want to accept that as the truth.”
I glare over my shoulder at my two brothers, who are staring at us with their arms crossed over their chests, daring Benson to make a wrong move.
“You can still kick their asses, right?” I ask as Benson tugs me to his boat, helping me off the dock.
“One on one in a fair fight? Definitely.”