CHAPTER EIGHT
Max’s Magic Rule #9:
Do what it takes to make the audience clap even louder.
Nerves danced in Grace’s belly as she stared out the car window, watching the landscape fly past. Max had kept his foot on the gas ever since they’d left Vegas.
The farther they drove, the more nervous Grace became.
In a way, she felt like she’d be meeting Max’s parents for the first time. Especially because Max said he’d never brought a woman to meet them before. What was up with that?
Had he simply not wanted to introduce his parents to a woman he knew wouldn’t be in his life for long? Did that mean he’d never been in any kind of committed relationship?
She knew he was different with his mom and dad. Sweet. More loving. It simply emphasized in her mind all those layers Max had. And how she was pretty much disregarding those layers in her quest for an orgasm.
“So,” Max said, interrupting her thoughts. “We’ve made progress with one of your goals. Have you made any progress with the baby plan?”
Surprised by the blunt way he brought it up, Grace searched his expression for any hint of mockery. All she saw was genuine curiosity. Relaxing back into her seat and welcoming the distraction, she said, “A little.”
“Will you tell me about it?”
“If you’re really interested, sure.” Anything to take her mind off whether his mom would take one look at her and know she was using her son for sex. At that wince-worthy thought, she turned back to the window.
The desert shrubbery had switched from drab khaki green to something more verdant as they climbed into the foothills. Lovely. The elevation and vegetation reminded Grace a bit of where she’d grown up in Georgia. Different, but the same color green. For a moment, an image of her mama and daddy wrapped in each other’s arms, Mama’s head snuggled in Daddy’s shoulder, came to mind.
Hot tears forced their way to the surface and she furiously blinked them away.
What was she doing here with Max? She was enjoying her time with him, yes, but it was also serving to remind her what she didn’t have.
What she’d had as a young child had been precious. Her parents’ marriage had been amazingly strong and beautiful. She hadn’t been too young to forget how very much in love they were.
She could create her own memories with a son or daughter—she didn’t need love and romance for that. She just needed healthy sperm and a man willing to be a father.
That man wasn’t Max.
***
Max caught a glimpse of Grace out of the corner of his eye. She seemed withdrawn, lost in her own world. As much as he thought her plan to create a family was bullshit, he wanted to know more about her thought process, her plans. How else was he going to talk her out of them? “Grace?”
“Um… what is it you want to know?”
“I’m not even sure—this isn’t a conversation I’ve had before. How do you find a baby daddy?”
“I’ve connected with a surrogacy agency to set me up with someone who has similar values and desires. It’s essentially like a datin’ service, only…”
“Only instead of connecting with the intent of providing a baby and then walking away, you’re interviewing with the intent to create a fake family.”
“It’s not fake,” she said with frown. “The baby would have a real mother. A real father. They don’t have to be married to be a family. Look at all the divorced families that still provide their children with stability and love. Sounds like you’re implyin’ anything other than a married man and woman isn’t a family.”
Max shook his head. “No way. That’s unfair, Grace. A family is a family, no matter what the structure is.”
“That’s my point. So long as the baby has parents who love it, what does it matter if the parents are married?”
“And what about agreeing on how to raise the child?”
“There are forms to fill out to ensure compatibility. Then contracts are created that specifically state major issues, such as to immunize or not to immunize, what religion the child will be raised with, private versus public schools, college savings plans, and so on.”
He jerked the wheel, avoiding a pothole. They’d turned off the main road a few minutes ago, and here the asphalt wasn’t as well tended. “Sounds like it will look great on paper. But what if the person you choose has the same compatible values as you do and follows the letter of the contract, but treats you distantly?”
She shook her head. “I’m still confused.”
That was understandable, given her whole baby plan inherently involved distance between her and the baby’s daddy. “I mean, Grace, what if the guy isn’t respectful of you? What if he comes to pick up the kid and ignores you, or makes some negative comment about the mud puddle in the middle of the yard.”
“What mud puddle?” she asked, her brow wrinkled up in confusion.
“When we were off tour, my mom would sometimes let Rhys and I dig a big hole in the front yard. We’d fill it with water from the garden hose, and play for hours. We’d end up coated in mud, our toys too, and there’d be a mud slick from the yard to the front door. Our dad would come home and see this gigantic muddy mess. When my mom would come out to greet him, he’d wrap her in a big hug and ask her if we were having mud pies for dinner.”
“I’m still not getting it,” she said slowly.
He blew out a breath. “What happens if you make a mud hole and the kid’s dad comes to pick him up, then bitches you out for getting the kid muddy or for mucking up your own front yard? What if he admonishes the kid for destroying a perfectly good yard, clothes and toys?”
Grace sat in silence, staring out the window again.
“My point, Grace,” he said, quietly, “is you won’t know how this guy’s going to react when you build a mud puddle, and you certainly won’t have any say in how he treats you. In what kind of behavior he models for your child. Is that what you want for your kid? Is that how you see ‘family’?”
“People get married all the time without knowin’ everthin’ about each other. There’s nothin’ to say I couldn’t be head ovah heels in love with someone who would bitch me out for gettin’ the kids muddy someday. Havin’ kids with someone is always a risk. I’m willin’ to take that risk even if you’re not.”
“Who says I’m not? You think I don’t want to be a father some day?”
Her whipped around to face him and she looked shocked, which pissed him off. Jesus, what was it about him that made women so easily dismiss not only his potential to be a father, but his desire to want to be one in the first place?
“You just seem okay with your life the way it is, Max. You can’t know what it’s like to feel an emptiness that can’t be filled.”
His chest squeezed tight.
She was wrong. He felt that emptiness. Every day.
It seemed ever since he’d started this whole thing with Grace, he felt it more than ever. Except when he was with her.
Wasn’t that what she wanted a baby for? To make her feel whole. Complete? No matter how true, that was a huge responsibility to put on a kid. She had to see that.
“So you think having a baby will make you happy, but what if it can’t? What if it’s missing a man’s passion and love that makes you feel empty, Grace?”
“There will be time for that. After,” she said. “But for havin’ a baby? My time’s limited. Every woman knows that.”
“Usually they’re not twenty-nine year old women.”
“You know women, but you don’t know anythin’ about bein’ a woman. So please, let’s drop the subject.”
They drove in silence for a few minutes before Max placed a hand on Grace’s leg and squeezed. Thankfully, Grace placed her hand on his and squeezed back. He didn’t let go and neither did she. “So, what happened back at the hotel room…” he said, feeling her out.
“What about it?”
“I didn’t intend for it to happen, but it definitely was consistent with my plan to string things out and keep you guessing about O-time, don’t you think?”
“O-time,” she said. “What? Is that like circle time? Nap time? Snack time?”
He’d just learned something else about her that he liked—she didn’t hold on to annoyance very long. He’d done as she asked and switched topics, and rather than continuing to light into him, she could let it go and tease with the best of them. He waggled his brows. “Nap time? No way. Snack time?” He glanced and her and grinned evilly. “I’m definitely planning on getting my fill of you.”
She sucked in a breath. “Go on,” she said. “What’s your point? About the—” She waved her hand, making him laugh. “—stringin’ things along, I mean.”
“When people start exploring sexuality, they generally begin with fooling around. You did it in college, before you had sex, right?”
She cast a quick glance at him. “Yes. Second base. Third base. That sort of thing.”
“What did you consider pushing the envelope back then? What I did?”
“Kissin’ my breasts you mean?” She cleared her throat. “No. I’d say a guy touchin’ my....” Her hand jerked, as if she was going to wave it, but she stayed the gesture, making him grin anyway. “Lady parts.”
“Fingering you?”
After swallowing, she nodded.
“Remember how that felt? Experimenting. Seeing how far you could push things. Going to the brink but then not letting either of you go any further. Didn’t you feel powerful? Did you have any doubt that when it happened, it would be incredible for you?”
She seemed to seriously consider his question before answering. “I remember feelin’ desperate. As if I was starvin’. Like if I didn’t get him inside me, I’d implode. Like I’d climax the minute he entered me. But also that I didn’t want it to end. I mean, I knew it would end. I knew we’d get there, but…”
“But it felt so good, to be on that edge. Because you could enjoy it all without fearing you’d get stuck there.”
“Yes,” she said. “It did feel good. Intense. But that was because I was inexperienced. I can’t go back in time. No one can.”
“You’re wrong, Dixie. We can get you back to that place, where you’re just feeling, not thinking. It’s where you’re in tune with my body and yours. When you’re so immersed in the pleasure we’re giving each other and an orgasm is a foregone conclusion.”
“That, or we get me back to the places I’ve been since then. Feelin’ a whole lot of frustration. Frustration you’ll feel too, by the way. Not just physical but...”
“But what?”
“You’ll get tired of tryin’, that’s all I’m sayin’, Max. But lucky for you, you have a deadline. One week. If you—if you find you’re tired of things before then, all you have to do is tell me. Please tell me. I’d hate the idea of you—”
Her voice broke and she looked out the window.
“I’m not going to get tired of trying, Grace. God, I don’t know how you can even think that.”
She laughed bitterly. “And I don’t know how you can say that with a straight face.”
“Guess I’ll just have to prove myself to you then. How about we start right now?”
“What?”
“You liked what we did earlier.”
“I think that was pretty obvious.”
“Good.”
“Why good?”
“Because we have long drive ahead of us. Might as well take advantage of it.”
***
“Just what are you referrin’ to? Because I’m not keen on getting’ into a car crash and bein’ one of those couples that has to explain to an ER doctor how certain things ended up bein’ where they shouldn’t be.”
He laughed but all Grace could think was, Did I just refer to us as a couple? Get it together!
“It really doesn’t matter what you’re keen on. I’m in control.”
When she didn’t respond, he prompted. “Grace?”
She stuck out her tongue. “Yes, you’re the one behind the wheel now.”
He looked over at her and grinned. “Bet that was hard for you to say.”
The area between her thighs heated up, and she felt herself go wet. “You have no idea.”
“You’d like it if I reached over and stroked you now, wouldn’t you?” he asked.
Good Lord, would she ever. “No.”
“That lie is going to cost you. Now try again.”
“Fine. I’m turned on. I’d like it if you stroked me. So are you goin’ to?”
“Nope.”
Frustrated both sexually and by the conversation, she turned her attention to the view outside. “Forget your theory about stringin’ things along. I think you’re just a natural born tease,” she said.
“Want to know how I get the most intense orgasms?” he asked.
Her breath rushed out and she studied the landscape hard. “Not particularly.”
“I’m ignoring that and telling you anyway. I hold off and hold off, sometimes all day long—”
“A whole day is holdin’ off for you?”
He shot her a warning look but kept talking. “—until I have so much sexual energy inside me I practically explode when I do come.”
She scowled. “Bully for you.”
“Pouting, Grace?”
“No. I’m not only sexually frustrated here, I’m also gettin’ jealous.”
He laughed out loud at that, and she found herself loosening up again. She loved teasing him, and being teased by him, and it had nothing to do with sex. Even so, her mind went there. She’d loved teasing him in the dance studio, on the pole and off of it, and she wanted to do it again. This time, however, she wanted to take it all the way. Testing him, she placed her hand along the inside of his thigh. His muscles immediately clenched and his gaze snapped to hers.
“You should probably keep your eyes on the road, don’t you think, Shugah?”
He immediately stared out the windshield. “Looks like you’ve already forgotten who’s in charge.”
More teasing, albeit is a much rougher voice than he’d used before. “I’m the one with my hands free, Max. And I’m seein’ another opportunity to take control.”
“That’s not what we agreed to, Grace.”
“I get that, but you’re goin’ to be workin’ hard tonight. Maybe even all week. Don’t you want to relax a little bit beforehand?”
“Talking to you relaxes me.”
“I know a way to get you to relax without saying a word.” She undid her seat belt.
“That’s not safe,” he said rather weakly.
“I bet you say that to all the girls who want to go down on you while you’re drivin’.” Not. She mentally snorted.
“I’m serious.” But he didn’t sound serious. He sounded intrigued in spite of himself. Tempted. And curious if she’d really do what she was hinting.
“If you’re serious, then pull ovah and stop the car. I promise I’ll put on my seatbelt and be a good little girl.”
She waited. When he just kept driving, she grinned. “Good choice, Max.”
She took a quick glance around, saw they were fairly isolated on the desert highway with only one car coming up behind them and to the right. Max had slowed down significantly and the other car would soon be upon them. His car windows weren’t tinted. If she ducked down, would the driver of the other car notice? The idea made her shiver.
She bent down toward his lap, gasping when he fisted her hair in one hand and tugged her head up.
“What game are you playing, Grace?”
“No game. Honestly, I just want to do this. And you said I could, remember?”
He frowned, clearly not remembering.
“You said, ‘You want to suck my dick? Suck it. But only because it will make you hot.’ Well, I’m already hot, but that would make me hotter.”
He swallowed hard and seemed to struggle for what to say next. “You sure you’re not setting out to torture me, leave me high and dry as payback for trying to talk you out of your baby daddy scheme?”
“I’m thinkin’ there’s goin’ to be a lot of people who are goin’ to try and talk me out of it. And I guarantee you my response isn’t goin’ to be to give them a happy endin’ in a movin’ vehicle.”
He loosened his hold on her hair and placed his hand back on the steering wheel. She took that as her cue to continue. He hissed in a breath as she unfastened his jeans, noting how the car suddenly lost acceleration before he steadied it out again. Gently, she lifted him out.
He was, in a word, luscious.
Or maybe magnificent was more appropriate.
Majestic?
Good Lord, whatever the word, Max Dalton did not disappoint in a single, solitary way.
He was thick and long and smooth, with a light dusting of hair at the base and a plum-shaped tip. With a small whimper of need, she bent forward and gave him a close-mouthed kiss. “God, Grace.”
“Don’t crash.”
“Easy for you to say,” he said. “If you’re really concerned, you need to stop because I’m obviously not going to stop you.”
She shook her head, allowing her hair to brush gently against him. Fascinated, she watched as he hardened even more. She stroked him lightly, then harder, making him gasp and bite his lip. The sight of his strong white teeth pressing down on his own flesh made her hunger spike. Quickly ducking her head, she sucked him into her mouth. Again, she started lightly, with gentle licks and kisses, before sucking harder and taking him steadily deeper.
She’d been at it several minutes when she couldn’t resist looking up. He kept his gaze on the road, but his facial muscles were tense, the veins in his neck bulging, his breathing labored. When she combined her mouth with her hand and a sensuous little twist, he groaned like he was in pain, tilted his head back and took his right hand off the steering wheel to lightly cup the back of her head. He rested it there as she worked him. When she began teasing, taking in less and less of him until he almost slipped out of her mouth completely, his fingers tightened in her hair, communicating his dual pleasure and frustration. He let this go on a while, but eventually pushed her face forward, forcing her to take more of him. She didn’t fight him, loving his unrepentant show of dominance.
With his rough touch, she became aware of more than his cock in her mouth or his responses. The vibration of the engine traveled through her body, making her shiver and ache. And just like she told him, she got so hot it was a wonder she didn’t burst into flames. She began moving her mouth faster, sucking him harder, taking her cues from the consistent groans that now rent the air.
“Oh Grace. Baby... I’m going to come.”
She’d already sensed that by the way his hips began to arch up, feeding her more of him, almost more than she could handle, but somehow she found a way to take everything he had to give her. Hearing him confess he was close to release was intoxicating. Their intimate little secret.
She murmured her encouragement, sucked harder, and with a few more hip thrusts and a muffled groan, he jerked, spurting into her mouth even as he trembled. She swallowed, enjoying his essence in a way she never had with another man.
When he was done, she rested her cheek against his thigh, licking her lips then smiling. Somehow he managed to keep driving, while she felt too stunned to move. Not because of what she’d done in a moving car—she’d done it before—but how close she felt to him. How proud she felt that she’d been able to please him. How utterly uninterested she was in anything he might feel obligated to give her in return. The pulses of sensation coursing through her body were enough on their own to make her want to purr. It was as if she’d truly committed the act for her sole pleasure, and how many people could say that with a straight face?
Even when she felt capable of moving away, she didn’t want to. His hand remained on her head, his palm stroking her hair, and his thumb rubbing gentle circles on her cheek or tracing her ear. When his breathing returned to normal and the car went quiet, she forced herself to gently tuck him back into his pants, but left his zipper undone. Straightening, she returned to her seat and fastened her seat belt.
She felt flushed. She felt powerful. She felt like she was lit up from the inside out.
But she couldn’t look at him. She was certain if she did he’d sense how hard it had been for her to pull away from him.
He reached out, took her hand, and placed it on his thigh again.
“Grace, look at me.”
Biting her own lip, wishing she was biting his, she did as he said.
“That was amazing. Thank you.”
“You don’t have to thank me.” She cleared her throat, struggling for something witty to say. “So how’d it compare?”
He looked wary. “Compare to what?”
“Those orgasms you were tellin’ me about, that were so intense because you made yourself wait?”
He grinned. “No comparison. That was the best damn orgasm I’ve ever had. For now.” He lifted her hand to his mouth and kissed it. “The only way it will get better is when I’m locked inside you, feeling you come with me. And I swear to you, Grace, I want that. I need it. And I’m going to make damn sure it happens for the both of us.”
Instead of rolling her eyes or snorting or arguing with him like she normally would, the words “I look forward to it,” popped out of her mouth.
She actually meant it. Part of her was truly beginning to believe Max was going to get her there.
“And I look forward to you touching yourself. Right here and right now.”
***
“There’s no reciprocation needed, honey. I told you, that was just me wantin’ to do what I did.”
“And I appreciate that, baby. But you wrestled control away from me. Time for me to take it back.”
“Makin’ myself come that way isn’t guaranteed, you know. I’ve nevah been able to do that with a man watchin’ before.” She felt stupid saying the words. They communicated something she wanted to deny. They communicated her inability to orgasm was so obviously not about biology but about her inability to trust. A man. A woman. It didn’t matter. She might as well have held up a sign that said “Control AND Trust Issues.”
But by the way he was looking at her, she obviously wasn’t telling him anything he didn’t already know.
“There you go again. Focusing on the orgasm as the goal. I didn’t say I want you to make yourself come. I told you I want you to touch yourself.”
He was back to his hold-off-on-the-end-goal-and-just-live-a-little theory. Which meant… “So just touch myself to do it?” Sounded like a waste of time to her… except, she reminded herself, Max would be sitting next to her watching.
Picturing it, her skin pretty much ignited.
“To make yourself feel good. To give me something fucking fantastic to look at while I drive.”
Well there you go, but as always happened when he expressed his need for her so boldly, his words scared her even as they pleased her. She automatically tried to lighten things up. “You mean the scenery isn’t doin’ it for you, Shugah?”
He didn’t find her funny. “Take your panties off.”
Slowly, she unbuckled her seatbelt again, raised her skirt, reached underneath and pulled off her pale pink thong. It was awkward, but she managed to remove them without flashing him.
“Now hitch your skirt up until I can see you.”
Lifting her hips slightly, she tugged her skirt up, stopping when she felt the cold leather on the back of her upper thighs. “Max—”
“Do it.”
When she was completely bare to him, he reached out, caressed her just above her core then tugged her thighs farther apart.
“Fucking beautiful,” he said, even as she moaned softly.
He withdrew his hand and reached for the radio, turning it on and flipping the channels until he found a song with a deep sexy beat. He raised the volume, then put both hands back on the steering wheel. “Now recline your seat back and touch yourself.”
Not pulling her gaze away from his, she touched her thighs first. She knew he probably thought she was teasing, when the truth was she always started like that. When she finally trailed her fingers over her most sensitive flesh, she quivered. Max’s eyes jerked back to the windshield for a quick check, then dropped back to her.
It reminded her they were in a moving vehicle. Once again doing something they probably shouldn’t be doing.
And she didn’t care. To prove it to herself and to him, she worked her clit. Her breath rushed in and out. Again, he glanced at the windshield. Again back to her. It started to become a little game. She waited for him to check the road to make sure they were safe. She really waited for him to look back. She wanted to keep him looking at her longer, so she started amping things up. She pushed a finger inside herself. Then two. She added another hand to the mix, so she could both thrust and rub.
Good Lord, it felt good. So good.
He looked away.
He looked back.
Looked away.
Back.
And it wasn’t lost on her that as more time went by, he was having more trouble tearing his gaze away from her to check the road.
The next time he looked away, she closed her eyes because she couldn’t help herself. She almost believed she was going to come. Only something wasn’t right. She couldn’t quite get there.
“Lift your right foot and rest it against the seat. Spread your thighs so you can really get in there.”
Her eyes popped open and with a start she realized they were no longer moving. He’d pulled over to the side of the road. Occasionally, she could hear a car pass.
She hesitated and was about to pull her fingers away from herself, but he leaned over, gripping each of her wrists, keeping them exactly where they were.
She looked over his shoulder. One car passed. Then another. If drivers slowed down, and maybe even if they didn’t, they’d get an eyeful.
“Do what I said, Grace. Now.”
Her whole body jerked, not in fear or surprise, but in scream-worthy arousal.
With his hands still holding hers, she did what he said. She lifted her right leg and planted her foot on her seat.
His hands urged hers back into motion. Gently forced her fingers to thrust and rub again. The music was still playing, and his fingers no longer guided but simply held. He leaned in close, staring into her eyes one moment, looking down the next. Giving her his gaze and taking it away just as he had when he was driving. The game was on again, and she was waiting and waiting for his gaze to come back to her… to leave… to come back…
The pleasure wrapped her in an almost smothering embrace. Because of what she was doing. Because of what he was doing. Her and him. It felt good.
They felt good.
Without warning, she was almost there. Her body started trembling. Straining. She recognized the signs. She was going to come. With Max watching her. She was going to—
Her gaze locked on his even as her fingers froze. Her mind rebelled.
No.
She couldn’t come. If she came, their week would be over. She wouldn’t get to spend more time with him. She wouldn’t be able to get to know him better. And she wanted to. She wanted more time with Max, and she didn’t care if he made her come or not.
He was so right. There was pleasure in the journey and not just the destination.
She didn’t want her journey with Max to end.
She tried to pull her hands away but he wouldn’t let her.
“You’re there, baby,” he said, his hands guiding her again, this time his fingers brushing against her as well, until she had to hold back a scream. “Take it.”
“Stop,” she said. “Please stop,” she choked out, and even she could hear the panic in her voice. Only she knew the true source behind her panic.
He hesitated and his grip lightened slightly, giving her the opportunity to pull away, quickly lower her legs and skirt, and curl towards the window. She pressed her forehead to the cool glass as she pressed her thighs together.
She wanted him inside her. She ached so badly. But this time she didn’t care. She wasn’t ready to let him go.
Not yet.
She heard him move and switch the music off.
“You okay?”
She nodded.
“You were there, Grace. Why’d you stop?”
She didn’t turn to look at him and she didn’t answer him for a long time. He didn’t push. He gave her the time she needed. He’d told her before, but now she got it: as her lover, he’d give her anything she needed, even if that was space.
“You said stringing the pleasure out would make it better in the end.”
“That’s true, but you were there…”
At his obvious confusion, she forced herself to face him. She tried to come up with another excuse to protect herself. Somehow she managed to take a huge leap of faith instead. “You promised me something, Max, and I want it. Not some half-measure. The next time I come, I want it to be because you’re touchin’ me. If I can’t have that, then I don’t want it.”