I’m excited but a little nervous.

Excited because I’m eager to introduce Jesse to the gang. I want him to meet these incredible people in my life, and I want them to see Jesse, this man I’ve been fortunate enough to have discovered. But that doesn’t keep me from being a little on edge, since they can be fairly intimidating…and not always the most welcoming of people. They haven’t always gotten along with all the guys I’ve brought around, Casey included. And I’ve also never seen Jesse handle a situation like this.

I wonder how he fares when he’s in a group setting. I imagine he’s as personable as he usually is, but it reminds me that I still have a lot to learn about Mr. Morgan.

We walk into the back room of one of the bars we meet up at, not far from my place.

A few overhanging light fixtures illuminate the pool tables beneath them. It’s not the best place to play pool, considering there aren’t many good cues along the wall, and I’d say it’s fairly questionable how level the tables are, but it’s good enough for us.

Jax and Dexter are by the pool table, Dexter preparing to strike the cue ball, and Jax gripping his cue stick, rolling his eyes because I assume Dexter is taking his sweet time—something we’re all too familiar with. Remy and Allison sit on bar chairs at a small table, chatting, Allison giggling at what I assume is something funny Remy said. Because the whole reason she’s always been hooked on him has been his sense of humor.

Baxter and Will typically hang with us, but they weren’t able to make it tonight. It was a lot different trying to get our crew together when we were in our early twenties than it is nowadays when we all have our own busy lives.

As soon as we walk in, it’s like everyone’s spidey-senses are activated, because they glance up and their gazes shift right to Jesse, whom I went ahead and gave them a heads-up about coming so they wouldn’t give me as much shit about springing a guy on them.

Although, this isn’t just any guy. This is Jesse.

“God, I gotta swing by more often. You guys have aged so much,” I tease, and everyone bursts into laughter, breaking up the awkwardness of Jesse’s presence. “Guys, this is Jesse. Jesse, this is the rest of the Bastard Motherfuckers.” I say that with the utmost affection, and as I repeat the name, my friends offer warm smiles as they seem to be reflecting on all the good times we’ve shared.

Allison hops off her chair and heads over. She runs her hand through her dark locks, nearly as dark as mine. She pulls that hair back behind her shoulders. “About damn time you made it back to your home.” She pulls me in and offers a hug before turning her attention to Jesse. “I hope you don’t mind hugs, Jesse. Because at this point, we’re pretty much related.” She winks.

“I’m totally fine with hugs,” Jesse says as he embraces her.

As she pulls away, she says, “I can’t believe you’ve been hogging my man all to yourself. You’re cute, so I’ll forgive it.”

The other guys head over and greet us, welcoming Jesse with their own hugs, being as open and friendly as I hoped they would be, even more so than they were with Casey.

“You play any pool, Jesse?” Dexter asks before pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

“I’m not terrible.”

“He’s on your team,” Dexter tells Jax.

Jax laughs. “You motherfucker. I’m always with the newbie. Come on, I’m good enough to make up for both of us.”

Jesse laughs off the teasing, and I sincerely hope he gets that it’s our way and that none of the guys mean anything by it. Casey sure as fuck never did.

“Eric, that means you’re on my team,” Dexter says. “We’ve got to break the couple up because you guys have been holed up for too long anyway.”

“Are you okay with that, Jesse?” I ask him.

“Only if you’re okay with me kicking your ass.”

“Oooh,” Dexter says. “Maybe I should have picked you for my team after all.”

We play a quick game of eight ball. And by quick, I mean the quickest because Jesse’s a lot better at this than he let on. So much so that Dexter’s cursing me because I didn’t warn them about my boyfriend’s impressive billiard skills.

As Jesse hits the eight ball in the corner pocket he called, Dexter shouts, “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. I was at least hoping that first round was beginners’ luck. You could have told us you were some sort of billiards Olympian.”

“Why?” Jax asks. “So you could have hogged him all to yourself? Serves you right. Don’t worry, I believed in you from the get-go, Jesse.”

“You are so full of shit,” Jesse says, all smiles.

“Eh, true…but now you’re my magic eight ball. Plus, you basically duped me too. Here I would have been betting for more than a couple rounds of shots if I’d known you could kick ass like this. Dexter, get out your wallet.”

“Go to hell, Jax!”

Dexter turns to me as I lean back against the wall. “Eric, can you please teach your boyfriend some of your business skills so that he gets he has to take advantage of opportunities like this.”

Jesse laughs, and there’s this sort of cockiness in his expression, one I’m already familiar with. He knows how much ass he’s been kicking during these games, and he seems to be enjoying the satisfaction of proving them wrong more than any money he could have been making off them.

“Someone gonna set her up for another game?” Jesse asks. “I won, so…technically, losing team has to.” He eyes me, grinning, and I laugh.

God, I fucking love this kid.

Jax shakes his head and turns to me, saying, “Eight Ball is as bad as you are.”

We all laugh together before we begin another game.

When we finish, Jesse claiming victory once again, I step out and let Remy jump in for me while Allison and I grab drinks at the bar—an excuse to catch up.

Since I arrived with Jesse, she’s been eyeing me with this expression I can read all too fucking well. She’s beaming, her smile ear to ear as though she has this secret about me.

“What?” I ask before taking a sip of my rum and Coke.

“Don’t you what me. You are stupid in love. If I was in love as you are, I would be embarrassed.”

“You are that in love with Remy, which is even more embarrassing.”

“I know, that’s why I have every right to give you shit about this, considering how much you gave me all those years.”

I roll my eyes.

“He’s adorable, Eric.”

She glances back at the pool tables in the other room, and I do the same.

Jesse’s joking around with Jax, who hooks an arm around Jesse and pulls him close before rubbing his head like they’re old pals.

“Fits right in, doesn’t he?” she says. “You always said we were all good at judging a person’s character, yet you couldn’t seem to believe us with Casey.”

“I figured you were all jealous that you couldn’t have me all to yourselves anymore,” I say, slightly teasing, and at the same time, there’s truth to my remark.

“Admittedly, that was true. But I have a feeling if we’re going to lose you to someone, it should be this one.”

“You’re not gonna lose me. You’re gaining a son.”

She laughs. “Oh, I’m your guy’s mother now? I love it. I knew I was getting old, but Jesus Christ, not that old. And speaking of old, talk about robbing the cradle. Do you always have to snatch the young ones?”

“This one isn’t like the others, at least isn’t young where it counts. He’s different…he’s special.”

“I can sense that. He has this way about him. He doesn’t seem like the kind who’s always had it easy.”

“No, he hasn’t. I think that’s why we’ve gotten along as well as we have.”

Despite all this chatting about Jesse, there’s a part of this that’s itching on my conscience—a part I can’t keep from Allison anymore. “I do love him, but…our situation is a little fucked up.”

Her expression sobers. I better be out with it. So I start with PV, and the connection…and then move into the deception. She does what she’s always done best and listens. “And goddamn if Ty wasn’t the best about it, but…we’re working on things.”

She rests her hand on my shoulder. “Well, you’re not going to win a Father of the Year award, that’s for sure.”

And I can’t help but laugh.

“It’s shitty, for sure. I remember when we were younger and you were this stressed-out, brooding, mysterious guy who liked to keep a lot of things in, and…right now, you seem very open.”

“I don’t feel very open. More like there’s some shit going on in my life that reminds me of exactly how closed off I am.”

“You’ve always had that stuff. But I don’t know, something’s different right now about you. There’s this mood to you that I can’t quite read. I have a feeling it’s a good thing, though.”

“Maybe you’re reading that I’m taking steps in the right direction, or at least a better direction. Although, as you now know, I’m making a hell of a lot of mistakes too.”

“We’re in our forties, Eric. We’ve all made a hell of a lot of mistakes to get where we are, but look at us now.”

“I thought you were trying to cheer me up, not remind me of how wrecked our lives all are.”

“Shut up,” she says, gently slapping my shoulder. Then her expression turns serious again. “I’m worried about Ty being hurt in all this, but I also want my best friend to be happy.”

“Welcome to the club of a fucked-up situation.”

“Another crazy, hilarious story the Bastard Motherfuckers will be telling in a few years.”

“I don’t know if it’ll be all that hilarious.”

“We’ll see,” she says. “Hang in there, Eric. Even though you might have royally fucked up, I have a good feeling about this guy. I don’t want to condone how any of it went down, but if it took me making a massive mess of my life to be with Remy, I’d take it because whatever it would have taken for us to end up together, it would have been worth it.”

Her point rings so true to me. It’s something I’ve been working to accept.

“But again, don’t disregard Ty’s place in all this. I know you love him, and he needs you now more than he’s ever needed you before. You need to be there.”

“I agree.”

“Fuck that,” I hear Jax say behind us.

I turn and see the guys heading our way.

“Eric, Dexter’s trying to steal my Eight Ball. Can you remind him that he didn’t want him to begin with?”

“I think it’s only fair,” Dexter says. “You played enough rounds with him, and I’ve lost enough money on these shots we owe you.”

Jesse still has that goddamn cocky expression on his face as he approaches behind them. “What can I say?” he asks as he slides between them and puts his arm around my shoulders. “I have a feeling I might be a little tipsy tonight with all the shots I’m owed,” he tells me. “You gonna take care of your man?”

“I always take care of my man.”

“Yes, you do.”

I kiss him, and it gets the guys going, and as Jesse and I part, I can’t help it—I’m smiling…insanely big.

Stupid in love, for sure.

While Dexter orders some rounds of drinks, ones he and I owe to Jesse and Jax for their victories, Dexter asks me, “So what are we going to do about your birthday next month, mister? Because I have a feeling you’re not gonna be in town.”

“Birthday?” Jesse, now seated on the stool on the other side of Allison, perks right up.

“Yeah, birthday boy,” Allison tells him. “Mr. Forty-Three coming up on May tenth.”

Jesse wears a sneaky expression on his face, like he’s already plotting something.

“Jesse, forget she said that.”

“Is he trying to keep his birthday from you?” Allison asks. “Don’t worry. He tried to do that to us too. But we tipped a bartender a long time ago to tell us the birth date on his license.”

Jesse laughs.

“Mr. Mysterious,” Allison teases again. “Don’t you worry, Jesse. You stick by me and I’ll give you all the dirt on this one.”

It’s funny because as much as Allison knows about me, there are things I’ve shared with Jesse now that feel like they would be more dirt on me than anything she might have. At least, things I wouldn’t want anyone else knowing.

We hang out with the Bastard Motherfuckers some more, laughing, joking around. Jesse’s relieved me of any of that nervousness I had at the beginning of the night about him possibly not getting along with everyone.

We throw back some drinks before the group agrees to call it a night. Before heading back to my condo, Jesse and I chat with Allison and Remy as they grab an Uber.

“Well, that’s the guys,” I say as we head along the sidewalk. I hope Jesse had a good time.

“They’re really cool, Eric. And I appreciate you letting me meet them. That meant a lot to me that you shared that part of your life with me. I know they mean a lot to you from things you’ve said to me in the past.”

“They do mean a lot to me. Everything really. I didn’t have a family, so I made my own.”

“Is that where the group’s name, Bastard Motherfuckers, came from?” Jesse asks.

“That’s something a guy shouted at us when he was wasted one night and Allison beat him at a game of darts. The gang all had to get the guy under control and into a cab. The name sort of stuck.”

“I like it. It seems to fit you guys nicely, from one bastard to another group of bastards,” he says, reminding me of his own circumstances, which are far more fitting than any of our situations. “Speaking of which,” he adds, “I’ll be eager to introduce you to my family too. You need to come over for dinner at some point.”

I tense up at the thought. “God, I wonder how that will go down.”

“Are you nervous about how my parents are going to feel about you?” Jesse asks.

“Scared shitless.”

“Eric, you surprise me sometimes with the things that make you nervous. You’re a very confident guy, and to think that my totally innocent, playful family intimidates you is kind of amusing.”

“I’m intimidated because they sound like really good people, and I would hate to think that they would think I’m anything other than good for you.”

Jesse takes my hand and stops me on the sidewalk so I’m forced to turn to him.

“Eric, you’re a good guy. And Charlotte and Stan are great at reading people, so I have no doubt that when they meet you, they’ll see what I see in you and they’ll trust my judgment.”

“Funny, I was thinking the same thing earlier about my friends.”

We gaze into one another’s eyes. There’s a lightness about this moment, a sort of appreciation for each other, and I love the way his face looks in the dim orange glow from a nearby street lamp. Although, I do notice a small darker spot just below his hairline. I lift my hand and run my thumb over it.

“Ooh, stings,” Jesse says. “A little sunburn I got yesterday while we were at the beach.”

“I wasn’t doing a good enough job taking care of you. I was distracted, and I guess I missed that spot.”

“It isn’t your job to make sure I don’t get a little sunburned. I’ll live.”

Even though I know he’s right, I feel like I hurt him, and I never want to hurt him. I want to care for him the way he deserves to be cared for.

“Eric, I’ve been taking care of myself since I was a kid. It’s not your job to protect me. Your job is to kiss the shit out of me.”

I don’t resist his suggestion. I hook my arms around him, pulling him close. My lips crush down against his, and he pushes his tongue in my mouth. He rests his hand on my face, then slides it to the back of my head.

Since we met with Michelle yesterday, I’ve struggled with being affectionate with him. Just needed to take a break. I was fine when we were at the beach, but after, I felt like I wanted to push everyone and everything away, including Jesse. It’s not the first time, and it won’t be the last. But in this moment, I don’t want to be without his touch…his taste.

I can’t stand how much I want to get him back to my condo, out of these goddamn clothes, rocking my fucking world.

We wind up in my bed, stripped naked. I have my arms hooked under his as I roll back so that he’s lying stretched out on top of me. He pulls away from our kiss, gazing down at me with a look I love. Like he’s claiming victory over me the way he was with the guys at the pool table.

“Jesse, Jesse, Jesse,” I whisper as I rest my hand on the back of his neck.

He smirks. “You can keep saying it. I like when you say my name too.”

I laugh before rolling again so that I’m on top of him.

“Aren’t you frisky tonight?” he asks.

“I was thinking that I don’t owe you a drink for those wins tonight. You deserve a good victory fuck.”

“Now that is something I could use.” He grins as I take his mouth once again.

And I can’t wait to get my cock inside this beautiful man.

My beautiful man.