After we finish up at the lake, we head over to our campsite. We have three tents to set up, two of which I brought, one for me and one for Jesse. We’re not spending the night together while Ty’s here, something Jesse agreed with when we discussed him joining us on my birthday weekend. We both agreed it wasn’t appropriate considering everything that happened.

Despite our conversation about this being the best solution, I didn’t really consider how awkward it would be for us all to pitch them together. I notice Ty’s gaze drift between me and Jesse as we’re all pitching our tents, as though he’s realizing it’s a strange thing for a couple to be doing. Still, it makes me feel a hell of a lot better.

I could tell there was some awkwardness between Jesse and Ty back on the boat. Not sure what it was about, but it seems to have smoothed over. Hell, Ty is even giving Jesse a hard time about struggling to set up his tent.

“No, you reversed the poles. I’ve done that a few times too,” Ty explains before helping him out.

He’s a fantastic kid, who could have done with having a better father figure in his life…and I mean me, not that ass Tricia was with when he was growing up.

Once we’ve set up our campsite, I take over the barbecue with steaks and mixed vegetables and potatoes wrapped in aluminum foil—all of which I prepared this morning before putting them on ice.

“You need help with anything over there?” Ty asks as he picks some cubed watermelon out of a container, something we picked up at the store on the way to his place.

“I’m all good here. If you guys want to grab some wood for the fire pit, now would probably be a good time, before it gets dark.”

“I got that,” Ty says. “My seedless watermelon companion and I will be back in a bit.”

He takes off with the watermelon container, and by how quickly he volunteered, I figure he might need a mental break from us. Since this trip began, I’ve been questioning every expression, every action, every slight comment he’s made. Just wondering what he’s really thinking while all this is happening…if he’s judging us, hating us. Although, if he was hating us, he wouldn’t be here. That’s something I find I have to keep reminding myself of.

When he’s out of earshot, I head over to the picnic table, where Jesse’s seated, pulling out the plastic knives and forks and plates to set the table for when dinner’s ready.

“How do you feel?” I ask Jesse.

He glances in the direction where Ty went, says, “Pretty good. Obviously I’ve been freaking out a little bit all day, over stupid shit, but this is definitely better than I could have imagined it would be.”

“I agree.”

“It’s these little things that are throwing me—stuff I wouldn’t have thought about. I said something back at the boat, about him getting his CPA certification. What you were telling me the other day. He wasn’t mad, but it reminded him of…what’s all going on, and the things he kind of mentioned to me when we had our talk after we told him what we were doing. Like…I might be his friend, but now if he says something to you, it might get back to me before he tells me, which I’m sure is strange for him.”

“I hadn’t really thought of it that way. I was telling you because—”

“He wasn’t upset, Eric. It surprised him, and I think he was even surprised that he hadn’t considered I would have already known. Don’t mention I said it.”

“No, of course not.”

“It was stupid of me.”

“Don’t be too hard on yourself. Let me be the one who’s hard on you.”

I’m trying to cheer him up, and it seems to work as he offers that dimple-filled smile I love so much. “Fair enough.”

I return to the barbecue to finish cooking.

Some time later, Ty returns with several sticks, which he tosses into the fire pit. While he works to get the fire going, Jesse and I set the table with the food. When we finish eating, we set up foldout chairs around the fire pit. While the sun finishes setting, Ty and Jesse talk about one of the podcasts they both listen to before they get into movies and Ty starts talking about a graphic horror film he watched. “It was gore and more gore,” Ty says.

“That sounds horrible,” I say. “It reminds me of this movie…” As I’m about to talk about it, I realize it’s the one I watched with Jesse. I’m not sure it’s a good idea to bring it up, but I’ve already mentioned it, so I might as well be out with it. I feel like honesty is the only way we’re all going to get through any of this. There’s no need for secrets. That’s what got us into this mess to begin with.

“It’s called Martyrs,” I continue. “Jesse and I were watching it on a plane,” I say, trying to make out like it’s not a big deal.

The excited expression Ty had while talking about the movie he saw turns serious. “Where did you guys go?” he asks, and I can hear the hurt in his tone.

Shit.

“San Diego,” I reply.

“You guys went to San Diego together?” Even in the dimming daylight, I can see his face turn pale. He shakes his head. “No, it’s cool. That’s cool.”

By the way he says it, I know it’s not cool at all.

“It was just the other week,” I assure him, but I don’t know how that’s supposed to help.

“No, of course you did. What movie did you say it was?”

I can tell he wants to change the subject. Subject change. Easy way out, as Jesse would tell me. In this case, it’s a godsend.

“Martyrs,” Jesse says. “It’s really good. Fucked up in all the right ways.” He sounds like he’s taking full advantage of the subject change, trying to pull Ty’s attention away from the fact that we went to San Diego together.

“It’s insane,” I add. “I was definitely judging Jesse for liking it.”

Ty smiles. “Yeah, Jesse can be kind of…dark with his movie tastes. I wanna hear about this movie.”

“You have to watch it,” Jesse tells him. “It’s crazy, and fucked up, and there are, like, five plot twists.”

“Not that many,” I chime in.

“There were a lot.”

“Now I have to watch this,” Ty says. “I wonder if it’s on Netflix.”

He pulls out his phone like he’s going to check and see, and we chat a little more before Jesse says, “Okay, let me go grab my charger from the car. Get some juice in it before it dies.”

“Good time for me to get my earbuds to listen to some music.” Ty follows.

I’m a little disappointed. I figured Ty might want to talk to me some while Jesse slipped away, but I can totally understand why that’s not the case.

Ty rifles through his backpack for a minute. It takes him some time, leaving me wondering if he might have forgotten his earbuds.

I look toward where the car’s parked and see a faint glow, and as Jesse comes into view…I realize I’ve been had.

I turn back to Ty, who pulls a wrapped package out of his bag and brings it over, a sneaky smile across his face. The closer Jesse gets, the more candles I realize are lit on the cake. “Christ, that thing’s a goddamned fire hazard!”

“Well, I wanted to make sure to give you the forty-three you deserve.”

As he nears, I notice he’s holding a present of his own, but I hardly have a chance to acknowledge it before Ty starts singing “Happy Birthday.” Jesse joins in, his voice atrocious as he continues making his way to me.

He holds the cake before me, and as they finish singing, I can’t help but take the cheap shot. “Who are you to judge Kate Bush?” I ask him.

“Shut the fuck up and blow out your candles,” he says with a wink—the kind of wink that reminds me of how crazy I am about this guy.

I blow, which takes some fucking time, so much time that there’s quite a bit of wax on the cake by the time I’m done.

“When were you guys plotting this scheme?” I ask.

“Jesse got the cake,” Ty says as he rises from his foldout chair and approaches with his gift wrapped in paper with “Happy Birthday” printed in cartoon-looking letters all around it. “And we talked about springing this on you after dinner. Here you go.”

He hands me the present as Jesse sets the cake on the picnic table behind me.

Jesse returns to the fire and sits in his foldout chair, watching as I open Ty’s gift.

I tear through the paper, open the box, and pull out a picture frame. And as soon as I see the image, of Ty and me, my heart…oh, my fucking heart.

“Ty…”

“It’s dumb. I found it a while ago, and—”

“What is it?” Jesse asks.

“It’s the first picture we ever took together,” I say, recalling the day we met.

My hair was longer then, and Ty’s nearly a buzz. I wore my leather jacket and a pair of jeans while he was sporting a tee and shorts for the pic. Seeing those bright smiles across our faces tears me up inside, because fuck, we were so happy that day. We had hope…that we’d found something special. Of course, goddamn, I sure wasn’t the dad he’d been imagining I was. But look how far we’ve come.

As I look up at my son, his gaze shifting away from me, I’m reminded that I still have hope, because he wouldn’t be here tonight if I didn’t…and he wouldn’t have given me this picture if he didn’t.

It’s not over yet.

“Thank you, Ty,” I say.

He shrugs. “I just found it when I was looking through stuff, and you know, whatever.”

I know this isn’t any more of a whatever than him joining us today. And it reminds me of what a bastard I’ve been all these years.

“It’s perfect,” I assure him, and he makes eye contact with me again, smirking.

“I want to see,” Jesse says, rising from his chair and walking around me to get a view of the picture over my shoulder. “Look at you guys!”

“Right?” Ty says. “That hair on Eric. Oh my God. Dated.”

“Whatever, I was cool back then,” I insist.

“I’ll give you that much. Jesse, he showed up in a rental car that first day. This…piece of crap, but the moment he got a place here, it was Harley-Davidson all the way. Do you still have that bike, Eric?”

“I do, actually,” I confess.

“I remember thinking you were so fucking cool when you’d show up on that, swing by for dinner. Mom always gave you shit about how you could hurt yourself.”

“I haven’t gotten to see this bike,” Jesse says, eyeing me suspiciously.

“I get it out from time to time, but nowhere near as much as I used to. I think I value my life a little more nowadays, and Allison and Tricia gave me hell about winding up in a body bag one day, enough that maybe it finally sank in.”

“Yeah, Mom was about as thrilled about it as she was when she found out about the tattoos,” Ty adds. He directs his attention to Jesse. “She used to tell him he was a bad influence on me. That I was going to wind up with them all over my body because he made me think they were okay.”

“She’s always lived more conservatively, with most things,” I explain to Jesse.

“That’s an understatement,” Ty adds. “Overcautious and paranoid are probably better words for her.”

“I feel like I’m supposed to step in and defend her,” Jesse says. “She’s always been very nice to me.”

“We’ll see about that now,” Ty says, glancing between us and laughing, and Jesse covers his face with his hand. “Whatever, man. You gotta let me take these shots when I can.”

“Totally fair.”

“Okay, okay, Jesse’s turn. Show and tell,” Ty tells him.

“You just want to upstage me with that incredibly personal gift.” Jesse passes his gift to me, and I open it, pulling out a vinyl of Kate Bush’s The Kick Inside, her first album.

I’m stunned that he would have come up with something so thoughtful. Casey never would have given me anything like this. Hell, no one would have.

“It’s an original version of it,” Jesse adds. “I wish I would have known you would be ranting and raving about Hounds of Love today because I would have totally looked for that.”

“It’s perfect,” I tell him. “Both of you guys. I can’t imagine having gotten better gifts. Thank you.”

“We’re kind of amazing,” Ty says. “Now let’s make some s’mores.”

We do just that and get to talking before Ty decides he has to see some of this Martyrs movie. He pressures me into turning on the Wi-Fi hotspot on my phone and pulls it up on Netflix on his tablet as we all lie on a blow-up mattress in my tent.

Because of all those twists Jesse mentioned, I almost forgot about the beginning of the movie, and I get to be horrified by it all over again, listening to Ty as he keeps shouting, “Holy shit!” It’s all too similar to my own experience of watching it for the first time. By the time the movie’s over, we’re all caught up in this mind-fuck the movie’s put us through.

“Great. Now I’m going to be thinking about that all night and not sleeping,” Ty says as the credits roll.

“It’s really good, right?” Jesse says.

“He’s right, Eric. It’s really good,” Ty replies, backing up Jesse.

“You guys don’t like Kate Bush, but you like this? I will never understand either of you.”

I enjoy them ganging up on me, though, especially since it gives me a glimpse into the friendship they shared before all this crap went down.

We head back to the fire and make some more s’mores, and I’m appreciating how at ease we are compared to when we first got into the car together.

Once we’ve finished the chocolate bars off, I realize the fire is getting low, so I say, “I think I’ll go get some more wood.”

“Eh, I think I’m about to call it a night, but this was really cool,” Ty says. “I’m glad we did this.” I can hear the sincerity in his tone.

Again, I’m reminded that he’s a much better…much bigger person than I’ve ever realized. I don’t know how he’s my son, because God knows I would never be so understanding.

As he heads for his tent, he calls out, “Night!”

He unzips the door and then turns back, glancing between Jesse and me, still sitting in our foldout chairs. “By the way, this tent setup you two got going on is cute and all, but you don’t need to be sleeping in separate tents. I’m not a kid, and I’m not stupid either, so be grown-ups and sleep together. Like, not in a dirty way, but you know what I mean.”

He starts to whirl around but then swings back to us and says, “I do appreciate the gesture, though.”

As playful as he was acting before, he’s clearly serious about his appreciation, and I’m glad he at least recognizes we were trying our best to be respectful of his feelings about all this.

He heads to bed.

Jesse’s eyes are on me, and I see in his expression what I’m sure he must read on mine as well: hope.

Maybe he was right. Maybe we’ll get our Ty back after all.