Jake

After a quick glance at Honey, I hiked up my jeans and fastened my belt to find my daughter. She was trembling when I reached her. She tried to speak but stumbled over the words.

“M-m-mommy’s s-s-s-ick,” she managed.

Honey had put herself to rights and found us. She and I traded glances before I took Jamie’s hand and led her to find Tara. The woman was in my bathroom, bent over the toilet puking her guts out.

Instinctually, I reached out a hand and stroked it down her head, asking her if she was okay.

After she stopped gagging, she snapped, “Of course I’m not okay.”

I didn’t take offense because it had been a stupid question. I just didn’t know what to say.

Honey spoke up from the doorway. “I’ll get some crackers and ginger ale.”

Tara turned angry eyes on her. “I don’t want anything from you. This is your doing.”

Honey looked taken aback.

“You obviously poisoned me,” Tara accused.

Though Jamie was young, she got the gist of her mother’s allegation.

Honey looked like she wanted to say something, but instead said, “I’ll leave.”

I stood up and when I did Tara demanded not asked, “You’re not going to take care of me?”

“Give me a minute,” I said.

I followed after Honey, who hadn’t gotten far down the hallway. I stopped her with a hand on her shoulder.

“I didn’t give her food poisoning,” she said with fire in her eyes.

“I would have never suggested it.”

“I’m going to take off now for a few days. I’ll only get in the way.”

She half waved a hand toward my bedroom door.

“You don’t have to go,” I insisted.

She looked at me with sad eyes. “Yes, I do. I know I’m supposed to watch over Ford, but maybe Tara can do it. You need to make things right with her.”

My mouth opened, but I closed it. Everything from what Tara said to my daughter replayed in my head. Still, there was another important truth she needed to know.

“I don’t want you to go.”

I slid my hand from the shoulder to her arm, wanting to make sure I had a grip so she couldn’t leave.

“We don’t always get what we want,” she said.

A disembodied voice filled the hall. “Jake.”

The sound of Tara’s voice grated on my nerves. But when Honey’s focus shifted to my doorway I turned to see Jamie standing there.

Honey’s next words came out in a whisper. “If nothing else, do it for her. She needs both her parents.”

In that moment I was torn between two people I cared so much about. The person who needed me the most and didn’t understand what was going on was my daughter. So I went to her.

“Is Mommy okay?”

That time her words were clear. I didn’t have a good answer, but did what I could to ease her mind. “She will be.”

“Is Honey… leaving?”

She started the last word and stopped before attempting a second time successfully. Tears pooled in her eyes but hadn’t yet fallen.

“She’ll be back.”

I assumed she hadn’t taken all her things. Movement on the bed shifted my attention. I caught Tara racing for the bathroom. I scrubbed a hand over Jamie’s head before standing and going to help the woman who’d broken my heart.

Since I didn’t want Jamie standing there watching, I sent her for saltines and ginger ale as Honey had suggested. Then, I spoke to Tara, who looked wilted as she caught her breath.

“As long as you’re in this house, you will not speak ill of Honey. You and I both know she didn’t give you food poisoning. The rest of us aren’t sick.”

“Exactly,” she snapped. “That’s why I said poisoning. She’s jealous and wants me out of the picture.”

Despite the fact Honey suggested I make things right with Tara, truth was truth.

“She has no reason to be jealous. She knows exactly how I feel about her.”

Tara couldn’t say anything because Jamie was back, small arms carrying a two-liter bottle and a sleeve of crackers.

I spent the next few hours taking care of the woman I’d written off so long ago. She convinced me to hold a cool compress to her head. I had to admit, she’d felt slightly warm.

By the time I’d fallen asleep on the sofa later that night, I thought for sure I’d pass out. But the damn thing was too short and I couldn’t seem to get comfortable. I thought about sleeping in Honey’s room, but I wanted to be within earshot of my daughter and Tara just in case.

I awoke to sounds in the kitchen that had me jolting upright. I thought it might be Honey but was disappointed to see it was Tara. She was attempting to make breakfast, which only got me to my feet faster. She was a disaster in the kitchen unless something changed.

My bones felt just as weary as the tiredness that still plagued me.

“I’ll take care of that.”

She’d cracked eggs right before I’d gotten there. Small flakes of egg shells had landed in the hot pan. I cursed a mouthful when I burned myself attempting to get them out before they were lost in the cooking food.

Jamie giggled and I looked up to see her at the counter. She’d heard the barrage of curse words I’d let loose.

I pointed a teasing finger at her. “Don’t you say those words.”

She giggled again.

Tara wrapped an arm around me. “Your dad is funny, isn’t he?”

Her tiny head bobbed as she laughed like she hadn’t in a while. Two reasons I didn’t shake Tara off. One: I was trying to save breakfast before it burned. Two: Jamie stared at us with a grin on her face.

Though I wanted to send Tara with her marching papers, I couldn’t deny there was nothing I wouldn’t do for the wellbeing of my little girl.

Breakfast wasn’t up to Honey’s standards, but I’d done what I could. When it was time for the day to begin, I waffled on whether or not to leave Jamie and Ford with Tara or take them with me. Selfishly, I didn’t want Tara left in the house to snoop. It wasn’t like I had anything to hide, but I had a bad feeling about her showing up. Why now? Months after she’d cut and run I would have chucked it up to the postpartum depression Mom had suggested. But it had been five plus years.

At the same time, if I gave her a chance, which I didn’t want to, I needed to know she was dependable because I didn’t suspect if I went that route, Honey would stay.

In the end, I decided to leave them. I gave strict instructions for Jamie to call me if even the tiniest thing went wrong and put Mitch on notice to look out for them if they needed help.

I spent the day thinking about what my lawyer had said. He in part agreed with Tara that conservative counties like ours would tend to lean to the mother without good reason. So what to do with that information?

When no one at the homestead called me all day, I assumed all was fine. Bone-weary, I walked in the house and smelled the burning before I got inside.

Tara was fanning the flames literally. I rushed over, calling her to stop as I reached under the cabinet for the fire extinguisher.

Tears streamed down her face when I finally faced her, fire emergency averted.

“I’m sorry. I just wanted to make dinner for everyone.”

In that moment, she looked like the innocent girl I’d fallen in love with all those years ago.

“Don’t worry about it. Go sit and rest.”

It didn’t matter that I’d only slept a few hours last night and I’d been working all day. Before Honey, this was the norm since Dad started having those spells of memory loss. So I pulled out leftovers from Honey’s meals from the last few days and had a buffet style dinner laid out on the counter.

“Honey’s food?” Dad asked before plating anything.

I nodded and he grinned.

“Great. I hope she gets back before we run out of leftovers.”

No one said anything more. We just ate. After washing the dishes because Tara had claimed to be still not feeling too well and had not eaten with us, I spent the rest of the evening with Jamie. Dad was snoozing on the chair as we played games, then I got her bathed and ready for bed. We watched a movie until she fell asleep. Tara hadn’t come out of my room the entire time.

Later as the sky darkened well past midnight, I took a glass of Bailey’s out on the porch. I wasn’t in the mood for Scotch.

Dad had been sleeping when I checked on him, so that left me alone on the back porch to watch the fireflies and listen to the sounds of the night, from crickets to the scurrying of small animals. I tossed back the contents of my glass, wishing Dad were still the robust man from my childhood. There was so much I wanted to ask him. His advice was always solid.

What I didn’t expect was for Tara to come out and offer me a beer.

I waved her off. “I’m good.”

I held up my glass still full. I wasn’t a regular drinker, but I gave myself a pass on a day like today. Hopefully the liquor would help me sleep since another night on the sofa was in store for me.

Unfortunately for me, she sat, putting the beer on the small table between us. Crickets’ songs filled the space before she finally spoke.

“Jake, I want this to work between us.”