I’d left Kristi’s last night the second she’d suggested it. I’d been relieved. I couldn’t trust myself around her. Usually women threw themselves at me, but there I was throwing myself at her.

I couldn’t keep my hands or eyes off her. She’d been hungry for my cock—I’d seen it in her eyes—but she still hadn’t accepted the inevitability of us fucking. It would happen—soon. I just had to bide my time and let her make the decision. I just wished she’d hurry the fuck up about it.

Clyde popped by my place late afternoon and, as expected, he looked pretty damn pleased with himself.

“You’re welcome,” I said, the second he’d stepped through the door.

“Welcome for what?” Clyde asked.

“Don’t be coy. You’ve got the look of someone who got laid last night, which means my plan worked perfectly.”

“I didn’t get laid,” Clyde replied.

“Really? Oh shit. I sent someone your way, but I guess you never met her.”

“You mean Tasha? We met.”

“But you didn’t screw her?”

“No, of course not. We got talking at the party though. I’m seeing her again soon.”

Such a romantic.

“Man, I hate to break it to you, but Tasha’s not the type of girl you need to buy dinner first. You only need to buy a condom and you’re in. I was setting you up with a sure thing.”

“And it worked. Like I said, we’re having dinner.”

“But…. Fucking hell, Clyde. You could have got your dick wet last night.” He actually looked happy at the prospect of a date instead of sex. What was wrong with this guy? “We have very different approaches in how we act with women,” I concluded.

“Yeah, no shit. I respect them. Anyway, maybe we’re not all that different. I couldn’t help but notice that you set me up with the sister of this girl you’ve been seeing a lot of lately.”

I shrugged. “I’m working with her. Nothing special.”

The words felt bitter on my tongue. What was the point of that lie? Clyde was the guy I told everything to. He knew about every woman I’d screwed whether he wanted to or not. Why couldn’t I tell him about Kristi?

“Tasha said the two of you looked quite close. She wants you guys to fuck.”

“She ain’t the only one,” I muttered.

“Wow.”

“Wow what?”

“Have we found a girl that is capable of resisting the Barton Fenner charm? I thought they were a myth, like unicorns, or exciting games of soccer.”

“She’ll give in eventually,” I said hopefully. She’d better, otherwise I was in trouble.

“Why the effort? I mean, she’s a pretty girl, but usually you’d have moved onto another one by now.”

Pretty? Kristi was much more than just pretty. She was captivating. When I was with her, I couldn’t bring myself to look at anyone else. When I wasn’t with her, all I did was think about her. I didn’t do that for a girl who was just pretty.

“She’s a nice piece of ass,” I said eventually, echoing Doug’s awful description. “And I enjoy the challenge.”

“If you say so. When are you seeing her next?”

“Tonight,” I replied. “For work. we need to practice interviews so that I don’t make a complete ass of myself when speaking to journalists.”

“How many times have I offered to help you with that?”

“No offense, Clyde, but you’re a lawyer—or will be soon—and you talk like one. You’d have me pleading the fifth to each question. I’m all for not being an ass, but you’d just make me sound dull.”

“Lawyers can be fun,” Clyde insisted. “Not everyone who works in an office is dull. Look at Tasha. You can’t accuse her of being boring.”

“And yet you went and asked her out on a date, instead of just fucking her until she couldn’t walk.”

“You and me definitely have a different approach to women.”

“Yeah, I approach them, and stick my dick in their mouths. You approach them and offer to buy them dinner.”

Clyde sighed in that way he always did when he realized he wouldn’t be able to bring me round to his way of thinking. He’d been trying for years. It was remarkable we were still friends, really. Even at school, he’d been the serious one, while I’d spent all my time playing football and chasing skirt. Now he was at law school while I was a professional footballer.

“We could double date,” Clyde suggested. “Me and Tasha, and you and Kristi.”

“I don’t date.”

“You might have to with a girl like Kristi. I don’t think she’s the type for casual hook ups.”

“I don’t care, I’m not doing the dating thing. I keep telling you, I’m not that interested in her. If she puts out then that’s all good, but if not, I’ll go and stick my dick in the next pussy that opens up in front of me.”

Is that what I had to do to get Kristi? Go on a date? It had never even crossed my mind. I knew what dating was. I’d seen it on television, and I had friends like Clyde who insisted on doing it. Dating to me always looked like a pointless exercise that people went through solely to avoid being labeled as easy. If I wanted to fuck a woman and they wanted to fuck me, then we fucked. Simple. Dating sounded complicated.

“You have such a way with words,” Clyde remarked. “I really don’t think you need interview training at all.”

“Couldn’t agree more, but the manager insists on it.”

“So no double date?”

I shook my head. “Not unless you really need the help, and to be honest, you don’t. Not with Tasha. You’d have to try damn hard not to get laid with her.”

Clyde narrowed his eyes and looked at me sternly. He was going to make a good defense attorney if that’s what he ended up doing.

“Don’t talk about her like that,” he scolded. “She seems like a lovely woman. I don’t care if she’s slept around a bit.”

“Yeah, sorry, man,” I said genuinely. “That was out of line. She does seem pretty cool.”

I had to remind myself that describing a woman as easy wasn’t always considered a compliment in this stupid world we lived in. Clyde was right though; Tasha had a lot more going on between the ears than the women I typically introduced him to. I shouldn’t have expected any less from the sister of Kristi.

“I’m going to treat Tasha how I would treat any other woman I’m interested in.”

“That’s what I’m doing with Kristi.”

Clyde laughed. “Yeah, to your credit, I suppose you are.”

“I’m nothing if not consistent.

“But Kristi’s not like your normal women.”

“Deep down, she wants my cock just as much as any other lady. She’s just better at hiding it.”

“Okay, but don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

“Yeah, yeah. Now, let’s go get something to eat, because I’m starving.”

“You’re always hungry.”

“What can I say?” I replied. “I have an appetite for all the good things in life.”