SEAN

 

When I got out of prison, there was one thing I had to do first. It wasn’t to finally eat a good steak. It wasn’t to dive into some pussy. It wasn’t even to get on my bike and hit the road. The first thing I had to do was put on my leather cut. I was a Black Reaper. I needed a reminder of who I was.

But I didn’t need my vest anymore. The patches were just a symbol of what I needed and it was finally time to let them go.

They rested on the table in front of me. My vest was blank. The patches had been there for so long that there were black spots where they used to be.

I held the vest up and examined it before tossing it back on. Then I looked around the table at all of the men who rode with me.

“Good luck, brother.”

Brawn was the first man to say goodbye. He walked up to me and wrapped his massive arms around me. I squeezed the big man back until he finally released me.

“Petey,” I said as I looked at the meek young man sitting down next to me.

He stood up straight and gave me a nod before hugging me.

Needle was the next man to say goodbye. That dumb smirk on his face, he looked at me like he was skeptical.

“You’re really doing it, huh?” he said.

“I’m really doing it,” I replied. “One day you’ll lose your virginity and you’ll understand.”

The rest of the chapel burst into laughter. But even Needle was smiling at the dig I took at him.

He leaned forward and hugged me while he whispered into my ear.

“Come back,” he said. “There’s always room at the poker table for you.”

“Thank you, brother.”

He pulled away and bumped a fist against my chest.

I turned to Ghost.

I’d probably known him the longest. Even if everybody else objected, I wouldn’t have cared as long as Ghost approved. Seeing the subtle smile on his face was enough to tell me I was making the right decision.

“I’m proud of you,” he said.

“You’re proud of me?”

“It takes a real man to admit that he isn’t fit to wear the patch anymore.”

I looked down at the patches on the table. It was like looking at a reflection of the past. But it was the past. I knew there was no other decision to make.

“I’m here if you ever need me,” he said.

“I know.”

I reached forward and squeezed him as hard as I could. Ghost and I were close but at this moment, I knew for sure that all the shit we had been through before was real.

Garnet was the last man I hadn’t said my goodbyes to. I walked over to him at the head of the table. Despite how defiant he stood with his arms crossed, his eyes were glazed over. He was a few years older than the rest of us, so he was a little more sentimental about all this shit. I didn’t hold it against him. He was the president of the club for a lot of reasons, one of them being he was the man that always had his head on straight.

“Thank you—”

“You don’t need to say anything,” he interrupted me.

He put his hands on my shoulders. Tears were welling in his eyes but he was staring straight at me.

“Don’t be a stranger,” he said. “You wanna get patched back in, you’re back in.”

“I don’t think that’s gonna happen,” I said.

“I know…”

He coughed and cleared his throat.

“Last order of business,” he said. “The deal went off without a hitch. The Chinese are happy. That whole incident with Poison was a diversion we didn’t even realize.”

“I can’t promise you another diversion,” I said with a laugh. “Shit like that isn’t gonna happen to Lydia or me ever again.”

“I just want you to know that I’m grateful for you. The last job you ever did as a patch. You’ll get what’s coming to you.”

I nodded. He wrapped his arms around me and squeezed. I sighed in knowing that this was really goodbye.

The chapel doors opened up and the rest of the Black Reapers exited with me.

“Let’s welcome Sean back to civilization,” Garnet announced to the Grindhouse.

He clapped his hands together and everybody in the bar joined in. It only lasted a few seconds before everybody went back to their business.

The only person paying any attention to me was Michelle, who stood next to the bar.

“So,” she said as I walked up to her. “It’s official.”

She glanced at the blank spots on my vest.

“It’s official,” I said.

“I’m happy for you.”

“I know you are.”

“It’s not just because you finally found a girl and you’re settling down. No, I’m glad you realize that happiness isn’t about you, it’s about someone else.”

“You know, I’ve been in Ivory all of my life. I thought I had it all figured out. I think I’ve been here for so long because I was waiting for her.”

“She came here for you. That’s why she left her life behind. She left everything to find you.”

She pointed her index finger and dug it into my chest.

“Don’t forget that,” she said.

“As long as she’s happy, nothing else matters.”

“Then you finally understand.”

She had a heartfelt smile on her face. I’d known Michelle for so long. Saying goodbye to her at this moment was harder than I thought it would be.

“What are you gonna do now?”

“Now?”

I smiled at Michelle. There was only one thing on my mind.

“I’m gonna get on my bike and ride. She’s waiting for me.”

“Go get her… Sean.”

Michelle winked at me. It was the last bit of approval I needed to know I was making the right decision.

I turned my back to the bar and headed toward the exit. Without looking back, I left the Grindhouse.