“Does the job really make you that miserable?”

I opened my eyes and turned my head to look at him. He was stretched out on his back next to me, arms hooked under his head as he stared up at the ceiling. I’d been dozing pleasantly, but now he’d brought last night back to me, my mood soured quickly.

“It’s not just the job. It’s other things too. Like my audition.” And Al, the worst of it. But how could I tell Wynn I was technically still in a relationship? Not that it was much of one… and Al was the one who’d wanted to have an open relationship in the first place—but that was mostly on his own part, so he could keep sleeping around with girls whenever he started feeling too gay.

His eyes crinkled a little in thought. “I can help you find a new job, if you like.”

“I don’t know what I’d do. I’m not good at anything,” I murmured, but my chest warmed at his offer.

“Surely that’s not true. You’re aspiring to get into a dance school, so you’re good at dancing, at least.”

“Not good enough.” There wasn’t really anything I could do. Al told me so all the time. “I guess… I’m good at sex.” Al had never had much to complain about there, anyway, but then again he was only after his own pleasure.

Wynn snorted. “So what? Prostitution?”

I chuckled darkly. “Nah, I don’t think that would work well for me either.”

“Why not?” he prodded gently.

I had to think about how to answer that one. “Because you never know what kind of people you’ll end up having to sleep with, I guess.”

“If you ever decide to do that, I’ll pay you a living wage just to have sex with me. Only me,” he said, and I was pretty sure it was a joke. He seemed more than a little serious though. Then he asked, “Has someone ever hurt you?”

And now everything got serious. “Why do you ask that?”

“Answer the question, Kasey.” And that was an order.

I’d planned on telling Adam last night, because Adam was my friend and I knew he’d help. Hopefully he’d let me stay with him and his boyfriend too. But Wynn… Judging from what I’d learned the past two days, he would help me. But was that wise? We didn’t know each other, he was my boss, we weren’t in any kind of official relationship.

“Yes,” I whispered, my voice barely carrying—but he heard it.

His voice was tight when he spoke next. “Who?”

I licked my lips nervously and sat up, slouching a little as I stared down at the sheets. “You have to let me explain.”

“Explain what?”

I didn’t dare look at him, but his voice was still tight, reined in. “Back in college I fancied this guy. He was one of the best friends of my best friend. Mathilda and I—we danced together. That’s how I know her. And Alistair, he was in her class, a good friend. And he was handsome and I really liked him. I think I was a little obsessive about it, actually.” I’d been a fool. “He noticed it anyway and started showing up whenever I was alone. We snuck off together because he wanted his dick sucked. I… did it. Every time he wanted me to. But he never did it back.”

I clenched my hands, hating how pathetic I sounded. Why hadn’t I understood it back then? “I thought I was in love. I understood it was hard for him to come out to his friends and his family. So we were together—but in secret.” I hated secrecy. But now I was pretty sure I hated Al more. “When he finished school and started university he suggested we live together. As flatmates—with each our bedroom, sharing rent. I… I moved in with him. I was happy he wanted to live with me. That meant what we had was actually special, you know?” Stupid, stupid, stupid. “That maybe he was working up to coming out. But then, after I’d moved in, he said he wanted an open relationship. And I agreed, because I didn’t want to lose him. We were young, after all, and like he said, lots of gay couples are in open relationships.”

I just sounded more and more pathetic. I didn’t dare glance down at Wynn, who was still lying down, unmoving. And what he said about open relationships… I didn’t know anyone in that sort of situation. Kian and Silver were monogamous, as far as I knew, as were Adam and his boyfriend. And they’d been together for years too, ever since college.

“It turned out he wanted to sleep with women. When he wanted his dick sucked or he fancied a piece of arse, then I was good enough. But only for a fuck, nothing more, ever. He never… reciprocated.” And that hurt, because when you loved someone you’d want to give them pleasure too, right? “And then he slapped me. I don’t even remember what for. I just… he continued doing that whenever he wasn’t happy with me. He’d slap me around, or shove me, or yell at me. Saying I was never good enough, I could never do anything right. And he was right, because I can’t. I mess everything up.”

Wynn moved, the mattress shifting a little. He’d sat up, braced on one hand, while the other rested on his bent knee. “Where is that arsehole now?”

“At home,” I whispered, bending over, breath coming in quick spurts. “And he’s gonna be so angry with me for being gone for so long and for not letting him know. I don’t want to go home, I don’t want to face him, I don’t want to be with him… but I’ve got nowhere to go. Kian knows we’re together and he’ll want to know why if I move back in with them. He likes Al, he’s not going to believe the truth. He’s going to believe him.” I pressed my hands to my mouth, fighting tears.

Wynn rubbed my back soothingly. “Don’t have a panic attack now, okay? There’s no need for that.”

I squeezed my eyes shut. “I don’t know what to do. I was going to work for a year to save up for school and a place of my own, but now there’s no school, and I can’t even do my job properly. And my phone’s broken and I can’t afford a new one, and—”

“Hey, shhh.” He hugged me close, still stroking his hand over my back. “I said no panic attack. This is all easily fixed.”

Easily fixed? Well, wasn’t he a ray of sunshine and rainbows. I’d been struggling with this forever. It wasn’t easily fixed at all.

“If there’s one thing I hate, it’s abusive arseholes like him. You really want to move out of there? Get away from him?”

I nodded.

“Do you have a lot of stuff?”

“Well, the flat came furnished, so… just clothes and stuff.” Stuff was a lot, actually. Books and electronic equipment and an extensive DVD collection.

“Then I’ll help you,” he said, like I’d half-hoped, half-expected, because he was that kind. “So no need for panic attacks. I’ll help you get your stuff. And if I meet that fucker, his face will be introduced to my fist.”

I had a feeling that perhaps him saying that should unnerve me… but it didn’t. If anything, it made me feel even safer with him. Maybe that was stupid—two days in, to trust someone so much—but he had been nothing but kind. Alistair had never treated me like Wynn did, not even in the beginning.

“As for a place to stay… you can stay here if you want.” His hand cupped my neck, thumb rubbing circles over my skin. “I know we haven’t talked about this between us, but I’m not usually a one-off kind of guy.”

Considering he’d watched me for months, and hadn’t ever planned on so much as speaking to me, I’d already suspected as much. “But two days in… Isn’t that a little too hasty? That’s the sort of thing that happens in song and films and novels.”

He chuckled. “Sometimes real life can be even more incredible than the most cliché song or film or novel. But I’m not forcing you. I’m just giving you an option. If you feel you can’t go back to your brother, my door’s open for you.”

I leaned into him, tucking my head in the nook where his neck met his shoulder. “I used to think I’d done something really horrible in a previous life, but now… I must’ve done something right, to meet someone like you.”

He enveloped me further in his arms, squeezing me close. “If you want, we can get this done right away. The quicker you get out of that flat, the quicker you get him out of your life.”

There was nothing I wanted more than to not have to deal with Alistair anymore. “He should be at university until four o’clock at least.” Al always had long days, but then he was studying engineering, so I reckoned that went with the territory. Add to that the travel home and he didn’t have much free time when homework and studying was factored in.

I dreaded going back to the flat, though. Dreaded what would meet me. But if Wynn came with me… I was safe. He’d protect me. Alistair had nothing to Wynn’s physique—Wynn could probably flatten him with one hit. Knowing that made me a little braver too and I squared my shoulders as I sat up and away from him. “Let’s do it.”

Wynn nodded, the wry grin in place, but his usually expressionless face seeming somewhat… satisfied.

* * *

What had loomed ahead of me as sort of horror turned out to be anything but. Alistair wasn’t home, so we got my stuff packed and into the car Wynn had managed to borrow from someone. As Wynn hefted the last bag with DVDs, I went into the kitchen and ripped a blank page of the small notepad hanging on the fridge.

I wrote It’s over on that blank paper, stuck it to the fridge with a magnet, and took a step back to look at it. Should I write more? But no, Alistair didn’t deserve any more than that.

If he’d really wanted to be with me, he would’ve treated me differently. He wouldn’t have lied and been both physically and emotionally abusive. He would’ve been more like Wynn, taking care of me and making sure I was happy too.

So Wynn and I went on our way without meeting Al. We didn’t meet anyone, not even any neighbours.

Carrying all my stuff up to his flat was another matter. Al’s flat had been on the ground floor—Wynn’s was on the top floor. But we lugged it all up and Wynn stacked everything against one living room wall. It was rather neat, nothing out of place.

“I have to return the car. Do you want to come with me or stay here?”

I’d worried so much about getting my stuff I was emotionally drained. “Do you mind if I stay here?” All I wanted was to curl up on the sofa or the bed and let it sink in that I didn’t have to go back to Al anymore. That all my stuff was here and there was nothing for me there.

“Of course not.” He ran his fingers through my hair and planted a chaste kiss on my forehead. “I’ll be back soon.”

He left and I ambled over the sofa. My phone, cracked screen and all, lay on the table. I pressed the home button, saw I had a missed call and could just barely make out it was from Adam through the cracks. I could probably manage to ring him back, but I didn’t want to do this over the phone. And I couldn’t send a message.

I decided to ring him back. I’d vanished on him last night, after all, so it was only decent to do.

“Kaz!” he answered. “There you are. What the hell happened last night? Wynn said he sent you home. Are you in trouble?”

“Ahh, no, no I’m not.” His barrage of words startled me. “I just had a really bad day. I’m better now.” Loads better now my biggest worry was out of the world. “I’ll tell you all about it, but not over the phone. How about tomorrow?”

“Why not today before work?”

“I don’t work today.” Thankfully, as I wasn’t sure I could face another night of a crowded, noisy nightclub in my frazzled state. “But how about lunch tomorrow? We could go to Harriet’s? Around one? Or two, if that’s better?”

He laughed. “Two, I think. I work all night, after all, and I damn well plan on spending most of my morning asleep.”

“That’s what I figured,” I chuckled. “I wanted to send you a message last night, but my screen—well, you saw it yourself. I’m lucky I can even see enough of the screen to call people.”

“Yeah, you ruined that one pretty good,” he conceded. “You could probably get the screen fixed though. I don’t think that’s too expensive.”

“Yeah?” I perked up at that. “I’ll look into it. Thanks, Adam.”

“Anytime, Kaz. So, two tomorrow at Harriet’s, right?”

“Yep.” It was pretty much our standard meeting place for lunch. His brother had worked there when he was younger, both before and after he started culinary school, and now he manned the kitchen full-time.

“See you tomorrow!” Adam hung up after that cheerful goodbye.

I stared at my screen, for once not really seeing the cracks. Adam sounded really cheerful. Maybe he’d just got laid. I didn’t think he saw much of his own boyfriend lately, what with him at university during the day and Adam working nights.

For once I could actually be happy for Adam, happy that he was happy, instead of that happiness mixed in with jealousy. I was done with my abusive relationship, and… a new, normal one might just lie ahead of me.

Shit. Going straight from one relationship to another. Was there a word for that? It felt like there should be, if it wasn’t. What would people say? Not that that mattered, not really, but… Kian didn’t care for Wynn, I knew that much. What would he say when he found out? He was my brother after all, and if anyone’s opinions mattered, it was his.

I dozed on the sofa, contemplating Kian’s reaction, trying to figure out what to say if he reacted with this or that.

Wynn came home eventually, after over an hour away. “Here.” He dropped something on my stomach.

I started, not expecting that. I sat up, took the little bag, and held it up. “What’s this?”

“Look for yourself.” He nodded at it, then turned and walked around the kitchen counter to the fridge. If he was actually looking for something or if he was giving me space I had no idea.

I peeked into the bag… and my jaw dropped. “But—Wynn! This is too expensive!”

“You need it, don’t you?” he countered with.

“Yes, but—not the newest model! I didn’t even need a smartphone, really, just one I can text with.” Because yes, inside the bag was a brand new phone—same brand as the one I had, but at least two models newer. And probably costing twice as much.

“Look.” He turned around and put his hands on the counter, leaning forward a little. “You needed a new phone. I bought one for you. Think of it like a… I don’t know, housewarming gift or something.”

“People don’t buy brand new smartphones for a housewarming gift,” I murmured, but the phone beckoned me. It had a better camera, better space on it, more apps I could use. “I’ll pay you back.”

“No need. Kasey, I’ve got the money. Don’t worry about it.” He came over to plop down next to me on the sofa, where he proceeded to grab my hand and twine our fingers together. “I’ve got my own business that’s doing quite well. I’ve got my flat and everything else I need. I don’t spend a lot of money—but I wanted to buy this for you. And I didn’t splurge for no reason—you did need a new phone after all.”

I bit my lower lip. I still thought it was too expensive a gift, but he didn’t seem to think so and no matter what I said I didn’t think I’d get him to change his mind. “Thank you.” I leaned in and up, tilting my head just so.

He understood—dipping his own for a kiss. Best to go with it, but if this turned into a habit… no way. I’d be really careful with this new phone so I didn’t drop it anywhere.

“And you say you’re not a nice person,” I mumbled, eyes half-closed as we kissed again. “That’s the biggest lie I’ve ever heard.”

He grinned against my lips. “Only when it comes to you.”

How was I supposed to resist such flattering words? Easy; I don’t.