CHAPTER FIFTEEN
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LIZ
THE NEXT THREE weeks were difficult. I felt like the fight had put a rift in the club and my life. Because of Jake, I avoided going to the Clubhouse. While Jenna and Ashley continued to go and spend time with my family and friends, I worked at the hospital, hung out with a few co-workers, or stayed home by myself. When Jenna and Ashley came over, I’d cut them off when they talked about the Kings’ club activities, making it awkward on all of us.
It didn’t help that Jenna and Nix’s relationship had grown. I was happy to see them together, but it was equally painful to watch. Every time Nix stole a kiss or affectionately touched her, it broke me to pieces. I missed Jake’s touch; no, not missed, I craved it. I’d lie in bed thinking of what it had been like to have his fingers inside me or his tongue tracing the curves of my body, and I’d ache with need for him. Touching myself while imagining what he’d feel like inside of me was the only relief I could get.
I would wonder if he ever thought of me, and then I was reminded of the woman’s face looking back at me in his living room. No doubt he’d moved on and buried his cock in countless women.
After lunch, I kept myself busy with charts, test results, and patient care and before I knew it, the day was finally through. I got home, showered, and thought about what I wanted to do. It was Friday and the Clubhouse was having its monthly fight night. I wanted to go, but I still had an underlying fear of seeing Jake in person. Instead, I ordered pizza and picked out a movie. An hour later, I’d gone through a quarter of the pizza and was dosing off and losing interest in the movie. A sudden call to my cell had me jumping awake. I reached over and grabbed it. Nix’s voice filled my ear.
“I need ya to come over here and check Max out. He took a pretty hard hit.”
“Have him go to the hospital. He probably has a concussion.”
“You know how these guys are. He won’t go. I need to you to check him out. Just give the okay or make him go to the hospital. He might listen to you.”
“Fine.”
It was loud and chaotic when I walked into the club. Everyone was surrounding the center of the front room, and I tried to look through the crowd to find Max. Nix found me and walked me over to where Max was sitting, his head in his hands, his elbows on his knees. I pulled a chair from the table and set it in front of him.
“Max, can you hear me?”
“Yeah, I can hear you.” He slowly lifted his head.
“How many fingers am I holding up?”
“Three.”
“Good. Have you thrown up at all?”
“Nah, spit up some blood. Busted my tongue on my teeth.”
“How much have you had to drink?”
“Too much.”
“You feeling sick or woozy now?”
“Yeah.”
“Were you feeling sick or woozy before the fight?”
“Maybe a little.”
“I’m gonna shine a light into your eyes, okay?”
Max sat still while I shined the light. His pupils were evenly sized and not enlarged.
“What did you have for breakfast?”
“Egg McMuffin.”
“You don’t seem to have a concussion, but I feel you should still get checked out. Especially since you’re still feeling dizzy.”
“Nah, if you think I’m fine, then I am.”
“Don’t drink anymore. If you have a concussion alcohol will make it worse. Got anyone who can pick you up?”
“Yeah, I’ll make a call if I keep feeling like shit.”
“All right,” I smiled at him. “So, who’d you fight?”
“Jake.”
My heart went into my throat. “Is he still here?”
“Yeah, he’s fighting one of our new prospects right now. The kid probably won’t make it out alive.”
I stood and stepped onto the chair to see into the ring. Sure enough, Jake was in the ring, shirtless, with bloody knuckles and a dangerous, calculated look on his face. Another swing of his colossal arm and the new guy went down and didn’t get back up. Watching him wipe the sweat from his brow and seeing the flex of his tatted muscles had my heart racing and my body responding viscerally.
I quickly stepped down before he saw me. With the crowd as thick as it was, I felt safe enough to hit the bar and get a shot to settle the warming sensation spreading in my body. Taking a stool in front of Jeff, I sat and chatted with him for a while. A couple other members’ girlfriends joined me for a drink. It felt good to see my club family again and reconnect with some of the members. After another shot, I moved through the crowd and mingled before joining Nix at his table.
The crowd had settled, and Jake must have taken his money because no announcements were made. Club members went back to drinking, socializing, and playing pool. I did a quick scan and when my eyes landed on Jake at a table on the other side of the room, my chest tightened. I stood from my chair and patted Nix on the back.
“I gotta go. I’ll see you at home.” Turning toward the exit, I moved quickly across the room. Just as I was walking out, I felt a hand take hold of mine.
“Peach, wait.”
The sound of his masculine voice sent a chill down my back. I didn’t want to turn and look at those inviting, warm, brown eyes. “Jake, I’m sorry, I can’t.” I pulled my hand from his and walked out the door.
Back home, I stood under the hot shower, nearly in tears. The gentle touch of his hand and the sound of his voice had my mind completely wrecked. Thoughts of the way his touch felt lingered, warming me and torturing me, all at once. I wished he hadn’t ruined what we had with his impulsive and stupid decisions because as much as I didn’t want to admit it, I still wanted him.
After three weeks of analyzing everything that happened, I felt as though it wasn’t all Jake’s fault. I shouldn’t have run to Dillon every time Jake made me jealous. I should never have asked for that date with Dillon in the first place; he was never who I truly wanted. I shouldn’t have assumed Jake was sleeping with Angela while she was staying with him. I’d never really given Jake a fair chance. From the moment Nix told me not to trust Jake that’s what I did. I never decided for myself if Jake was someone I could trust with my heart.
The last night we were together, Jake was asking me, in his own way, to open up to him, but I remained closed off, unwilling to let go and trust him. If I would’ve given him even a piece of me, he wouldn’t have gone off the rail over Dillon, then turned to another woman. I didn’t forgive him for what he did, nor did I think it was okay, but at least now I understood how he got there. Jake was far more complex than I’d realized. He wasn’t the kind of guy to tell you how he felt. He spoke with action, and in his actions, he’d been telling me I meant something to him.
I stepped out of the shower and patted the towel over my hair to dry it, then wrapped it around me and brushed my teeth. At the sound of my bedroom floor creaking, I quickly spit into the sink and wiped my mouth. My chest tightened and I opened the door a crack to see who was in my room. My jaw nearly dropped at the sight of Jake sitting on my bed. I flung the door open and crossed my arms.
“What are you doing in my house, in my room, on my bed?”
Jake rested his elbows on his knees. “We need to talk.” His glistening eyes kept lowering to where my towel ended at my upper thighs.
“I’m not sure I’m ready to listen.” I walked to my closet and slipped inside.
“Damn it, Peach.” His heavy boots thudded across the floor after me. “I know I messed up. I want to fix it.” His eyes settled on me before he pulled me into his arms. “I need you. I’ve been a fucking wreck without you.” His hand reached up and cupped my face as his thumb pressed down on my lip.
“Jake, please,” I whispered, my arousal slipping through my voice.
“I’ve thought of these lips every single day for the last three weeks.”
His lips crashed into mine with such fierce need, my body buzzed to life. He didn’t let up and I couldn’t pull away. We came up for air, my lids heavy, my body dizzy with lust. With one quick motion, he cupped my ass, raised my legs, wrapped them around his waist, and carried me the few steps back to my bed.
He laid me beneath him, pressing his growing erection into me as he growled into my mouth and claimed my lips. “I need to have you, Peach. Tell me you want me.” His hand slipped beneath the towel and caressed between my legs. “God damn, you’re soaking wet for me.” His fingers slid in and my head arched back against the bed as my breath left me.
“Jake.”
“Let me show you how much I missed you.” His fingers stroked with unleashed desire, filling my head with fog, making my willpower grow weak. His hand cupped me as his fingers whipped over my clit, rubbing me into a moaning, wiggling, sexually dazed wreck.
“That’s it, Peach. Come for me.”
Once again, I’d lost myself to him. His control over me was undeniable. My body gave exactly what we both wanted. I came apart in his hand and moaned through my orgasm.
“Tell me you want me.” His whiskey scented lips found mine and claimed them. His hand brushed along my side, caressing me gently. “Tell me you’ve forgiven me.”
“Jake, I can’t do this.” Tears stung my eyes. “You can’t hurt me and think you can make it better with sex.”
His eyes looked down at me, pulling me into his magnetism. “I lost it when I thought you wanted Dillon. The thought of him having you the way I want to, I wanted to kill ‘em, Peach.” He put his head to mine. “I don’t ever want another man to touch you like I do.”
“What you did. I can’t forgive easily. You have to earn my trust, Jake, and you can’t fall apart when I don’t give it at your pace.”
“I’m an impulsive asshole. I can’t be a nice guy for you, Peach, but I want to be the only man for you.”
“This is how it always is with you. It’s what you want when you want it. You’re ready for us to get back together, so I need to accept you were going to sleep with another woman because you were jealous and pissed off. If I hadn’t showed up when I did, you would have slept with her. You wouldn’t have taken into consideration how that would’ve hurt me, how much it did hurt me to see her where I should’ve been.” I pushed him off of me and stood, holding the towel tight around me. “I’m not ready to forgive and forget. I’ve completely lost trust in you. I miss you every damn day, Jake, but I’m not ready to let you back in yet.”
His hands took hold of my waist and pulled me between his legs. His hand slid beneath my towel and caressed along the outside of my thigh as his eyes met mine.
“It’s only a matter of time before I have you, Peach. I’m not gonna give up until I do.”