NINETEEN
Donovan
Donovan avoided the phone calls that kept coming. His parents, Layla’s, her friends, even Ethan, who Donovan hadn’t seen in almost two years, had called to threaten his life for knocking up his baby sister.
It was a clusterfuck of bad and Donovan knew he’d never worm his way out of it. Part of him wanted to be angry. She’d stupidly forgotten to keep herself protected. But he knew it was a mistake she hadn’t made on purpose. Of course not. She didn’t even like him. Why the hell would she purposefully let him knock her up?
She’d left him alone on the street in front of her house. She’d left Donovan to face their parents, to sort through their plans, their worry, their fear, until he could only fall onto the sofa, taking every insult, every scream they’d shouted at him. He deserved it. It was medicine he’d gladly take.
But then the night wore on, the hours stretched and Donovan sat at his apartment staring down at his phone, his fear and anxiety doubling as the messages came. “Where is Layla?” her mother had asked. “What have you done to her?”
What had he done? God, what hadn’t he done to her?
When one o’clock came around and her friends and parents continued to worry over her, Donovan stopped staring at his phone and made a call. Declan picked him up ten minutes later and for two hours they drove down every street, looked in every alley, desperately trying to find even the smallest hint of where Layla had disappeared to.
He’d gone home alone, defeated.
And then, at 3:24 in the morning, someone knocked on Donovan’s door.
He opened it too quickly, feeling that tight knot of fear that had developed in his stomach the moment he heard Mullens ask who had gotten her pregnant. But the fear dissolved completely when he saw Layla standing on his front landing.
It took every bit of control not to grab her, not to take her in his arms and hold her so tight that she’d have no hope of ever leaving. But her face was so pale and there were faint streaks on her cheeks, and Donovan knew he was responsible for every tear that night, likely every one she’d cried for months. He didn’t deserve to touch her. Not when he was the cause of all her pain.
The air around them was freezing with a hint of snow as they stared at each other, a slight awkwardness humming between them.
“Are you okay?” It was all he could think to ask and she shrugged. He didn’t blame Layla for her earlier anger or her tears now. He didn’t expect she’d ever forgive him.
Finally he noticed the large bag in her hands and the one resting at her feet, and realized her being angry at him was the least of the problems they had to deal with that night.
“My father told me that I had to either marry you or leave his house.”
He couldn’t help it, the comment came before he could stop it. “Are you here to propose?”
Layla’s frown was deep and Donovan wanted to kick himself. “No. Don’t… don’t ever expect that.”
“I’m sorry,” he said, meaning it. “That was a too soon joke.”
“He acts as though I’m sixteen and knocked up, not twenty-three.” He could tell she wanted to change the subject and he was glad for the switch in focus.
“Layla, our parents only ever see us as kids. To them, we’ll be sixty and still clueless kids.”
Layla shifted her gaze to the door and Donovan gritted his teeth, moved his fingers into a fist when he noticed fresh tears collecting behind her eyelashes. “I… I knocked.”
He stepped over the threshold wanting so badly to touch her. “I told you never to do that.”
He could see her fear, could almost taste it. “I… I’m not here to sleep with you. I just…” Layla took a breath, deep and long, as though whatever she planned to say required more effort than she could manage.
“Declan and Autumn, they’re practically married already and Mollie went to Maryville with Vaughn and…” she laughed, shaking her head, “they’re moving in together, can you believe it? He asked and she got freaked out. It’s why she wanted me to meet her tonight.” She blinked, and those building tears clung to her lashes. “Mollie’s moving to Maryville. Autumn and Declan will probably be off somewhere overseas with Joe once they graduate and Sayo…”
Layla closed her eyes and the dam broke, fresh tears leaking fast and hard, curving down the contours of her cheeks. “I went to the hospital because Sayo called me.” She covered her face, her head moving like she wanted the news not to be true.
“Layla?” Donovan reached for her but lowered his hand to his side when the head shaking only increased.
Her voice broke, and his chest clenched, like someone had thumped him hard. He knew the news would be bad; that look on Layla’s face told him all he needed to know. “Rhea stopped breathing tonight. They had to rush her back to the hospital. She’s only got… weeks, maybe days, Donovan. Those poor people, Sayo’s aunt and uncle…” Her next words came out as if they’d scraped against her throat. “I’ve never seen anyone so… lost.”
Donovan could only nod as he moved closer to her. The light above them caught in Layla’s blonde hair and her mused tangles fell against her face when she tilted her head. “It made me realize I couldn’t… I could never kill…” She closed her eyes again, wiping her face dry. “How could I do that? How could I take what I’ve been given and forget that it isn’t real? When there are people like Sayo’s aunt and uncle who pray for what’s happened to me? I just don’t…” She inhaled, breathing hard like she was tired of crying, like it was a struggle, all this emotion, all the pain the day had brought. “I thought maybe…”
The words stuck in Layla’s throat and she kept moving her gaze from her hands to Donovan’s face. In each glance up at him, Layla sought permission, a small hint of approval from Donovan that he wasn’t sure he was worthy to give. “If you were okay with it… maybe a family like theirs… who’d lost… who’d never had and wanted so badly… they’d take good care of my… of this baby, right?”
“Layla…”
She shook her head again. “I… I don’t know what I want. This baby, all this, I’m so confused. Donovan, I’m so damn scared.” She looked down again, shifting her heavy bag to her other hand and Donovan took it from her, bringing her gaze back to his face. “I didn’t come here to sleep with you.”
“You said that.”
“I just… My friends, they have their own worries. They don’t need me adding to it and I just…” He couldn’t look at those tears, couldn’t take the small sob she tried to silence as quickly as she made it. “I don’t have anywhere else to go.”
Donovan didn’t think. He didn’t care that Layla Mullens had changed his life. He didn’t care that his fear felt heavy and burned his insides. He didn’t care that no matter what they decided, this baby would be in the world, a living, breathing part of him, of her. It only mattered that he cared about Layla, that he’d do just about anything to take the tears away from her.
Her bag landed with a thump behind him when he tossed it inside the door and Layla stopped trembling when he picked up the other one at her feet and threw it next to the first one.
Donovan didn’t wait for her permission, then. He touched Layla’s face and smiled. “Come here, brat,” he said pulling her against his chest.