FIVE
Autumn McShane and I have shared everything since we were little. She knew that I stole twenty bucks from my mother’s purse in fifth grade because I wanted five books, not three at the school book fair. She knew that when Nicky Thompson pinched and fondled my boobs freshman year, I’d orgasmed in just under a minute. I knew that she snuck out to see Roger Smith our sophomore year because he was moving back to Houston the next day and Autumn wanted to see if everything from Texas really was bigger. I knew that she’d secretly wanted to say yes to Declan when he first proposed despite them only dating for a few months. He’s asked every week since then, always with “Is it sometime yet?” and she always answered “no, not yet.” I also knew that my best friend’s refusals were getting less and less adamant.
We knew each other. We knew each other’s faults and habits and we knew how to apologize, when that usually it only took a hug and a teary laugh to forgive and forget.
It’s all it took now. One smile and my eyes a bit blurry, and Autumn was hugging me, the pair of us blocking the hallway leading to Rhea’s room.
“I love you,” she whispers, hugging me so tightly that my back popped.
“I love you.”
“Jaysus,” Quinn moans, earning a glare from me and a jerk of Declan’s head, instructing his brother to sit on the benches at the end of the hall.
“Wanker,” Declan mutters as his brother moves down the hall. It isn’t until Quinn is nearing the benches that Declan loses his glare and his gaze passes back to us. “How is she?” the big Irishman says, letting Autumn slip to his side.
“Better. Much better.” For the first time in weeks, I feel rested, not as down. Carol’s phone call this morning had pulled me out of my funk.
“White blood cell count is inching toward normal. We still have to wear masks but she can have visitors again.” I hadn’t let Aunt Carol finish her explanation before I hopped in my car and made it to the hospital in less than fifteen minutes.
“Can we see her?” Autumn asks and her smile is so wide, so hopeful that I can only return it, feeling an uncommon swell of gratitude toward my best friend.
“Yeah, of course, but first I wanted to talk to you about the fundraiser.”
“What are we raising funds for?”
“Um,” I start, checking to make sure my family isn’t there. “The experimental treatment for Rhea. Aunt Carol has been trying to organize something to raise the funds for it, but she’s been so overwhelmed with taking care of Rhea that it hasn’t gone anywhere. I thought since we’ve pulled together a massive book sale every year then maybe we can organize the fundraiser for her. You think perhaps Ava…”
“How much do they need?” Declan tilted his head, smiling easily to apologize for interrupting me.
“I know what you’re thinking,” I tell him. “But it won’t work. I offered up my savings but they wouldn’t take it.” Declan opens his mouth, encouraged by the proud smile Autumn gives him, but stops when I shake my head. “Declan, whatever you’re thinking, really, I so appreciate it, honestly, but it just won’t do.”
“I don’t want that money, Sayo.” His expression darkens when I continue to shake my head. Declan had never met his birth father, Quinn’s father. But when Quinn’s mother died, the inheritance she’d withheld from Declan went directly to him. I’d never asked how much money Declan had inherited but I did know he had no interest in that money just as his birth father had never had any interest in him.
“Deco, you’re so sweet. Thank you,” I say, meaning it. “It’s too much. I… um…” I glanced back at Quinn then stepped closer to Autumn and Declan, not wanting to advertise my business. “I have thirty grand and they refused it.”
“How much does the treatment cost?” Declan asks again, clearing his throat when I close my mouth.
“Eighty grand.”
“Jaysus.”
“Indeedy.”
“Sayo?” Aunt Carol is walking toward us, looking rested. The dark circles around her eyes have dimmed, finally. “Oh, Autumn, sweetheart, Declan, so good of you both to come.” Carol kisses Autumn and pats Declan’s back as way of greeting.
“Carol, Sayo mentioned a fundraiser.” Autumn’s smile is still wide, still sweet and my aunt, being the well-mannered southern lady that she is, nods to my best friend, though I can see her discomfort. Autumn sees it to, but grabs Carol’s hand and rubs it, like a mother comforting a nervous child. “Sayo and I organize the library book sale every year. We even put Declan to work, didn’t we, sweetie?” She winks at Declan when he nods. “Anyway, well, we’d be happy to organize a fundraiser for Rhea. There’s really nothing to it.”
Aunt Carol seems a little overwhelmed by the way Autumn takes over, already offering up ideas and plans, whiffing on organizations that could donate and volunteers that we could pool from her freshman classes. As Autumn runs through a list of projects and chores we would need to tackle before the big day, “starting with the day of the event,” I step back, glancing down the hall to see that Quinn is missing from the benches. I wave at Declan while Carol and Autumn improvise ideas about the fundraiser, and go to check if Rhea is finished with her lunch.
But as I inch closer to her open door, I hear unexpected laughter coming from her room. Rhea hasn’t laughed once in months. No jokes, no shows, no films or comics have lifted her spirits since she landed back in the hospital. Until now.
“Do it again,” I hear her say, that soft giggle getting louder. “Oh, that’s so funny.”
Nothing could surprise me more than what I see as I turn the corner and walk into Rhea’s room. She’s sitting up in her bed, as Quinn scribbles with a black marker over a green paper face mask. On his head he wears two more separate masks, both with oversized eyes drawn on their surfaces. When he pulls them down over his own eyes, they look ridiculous and crossed.
“Rhea?” I ask, stepping further into the room, but my little cousin ignores me in favor of the two new masks Quinn fastens over her eyes.
“There you are, love. Look, we’ll have a photo.” Completely ignoring me, Quinn leans next to Rhea and they move their heads together just as he snaps a selfie with his phone.
“What’s going on in here?” I ask, stepping closer to the bed. “Rhea?”
“Quinn’s making me faces with the stupid masks, Sayo.” Her laugh is still blessedly light and buoyant. Although I cannot believe that asshole is being sweet to Rhea, I don’t have the heart to kick him out.
“Is he?” I ask, leaning next to her on the bed.
“Yeah, do you want one?” She doesn’t wait for me to answer before she hands a clean mask from the small pile in her lap to Quinn. “Make Sayo some, okay?”
It’s only then, when Rhea prompts him, that Quinn finally looks at me, nodding in answer to her question with his attitude cool, unaffected by how stiffly I sit on the bed and how hard I glare at him.
“Hey, Sayo, Quinn says he has a Thor comic book signed by Stan Lee, isn’t that right, Quinn?”
The smallest shift of his gaze in my direction and Quinn nods, focusing on the cross eyes he draws on the masks.
“Full of surprise, aren’t you?” I say to Quinn when he hands me the masks. And I sit there with the verbal lashing of a lifetime pulsing on the tip of my tongue, slipping the masks over my eyes, earning a laugh first from Rhea and then from Autumn and Declan as they stand in the doorway.
When Carol announces that it’s time for Rhea’s nap, and I follow Autumn and Declan out of the hospital, with Quinn trailing behind, I glance over my shoulder, wondering what game he’s playing. He catches my look, his face hard, his expression blank before he looks away from me.
O’Malley is a strange one. Entitled, absolutely. Arrogant? Definitely. So why am I not as uncomfortable as I should be that my little cousin likes him? A better question is how is Quinn able to be so nice and sweet to a kid when he has no evidence of an actual heart beating beneath his chest? As I drive away from the hospital, I promise myself that was a question I intend to find out for myself.