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Chasing Christmas: (Sweet Holiday Western Romance) (Rodeo Romance Book 5) by Shanna Hatfield (8)

Chapter Eight

 

“If you don’t stop laughing like a hyena, I’m gonna haul you out to the back forty and leave you there to freeze,” Chase threatened Lucas as they finished the evening feeding.

Lucas continued chuckling. “I can’t help it, bro. Every time I think of you accidentally getting married, it makes me laugh all over again.”

Chase had filled in his best friend about the drama that ensued after Lucas and Lori caught a return flight to Pasco so they could get back to the ranch. Lucas had laughed so hard on the phone that Chase hung up on him. It took almost thirty minutes for Lucas to call him back. Even then, the man kept clearing his throat and chortling like an idiot.

“I still don’t see why this whole thing strikes you as so amusing. I don’t see a single thing funny about it.” Chase raked the last of the hay off the back of the flatbed truck they used to feed the bulls out in the pasture. Lucas leaned across the cab and steered the truck in low gear while Chase dumped off the hay. When he finished, Chase jumped off the truck, jogged to the driver’s side door and slid behind the wheel.

Lucas settled back on the passenger side and offered Chase a cheeky grin. “I know you don’t think it’s humorous. I know you think your life has come to a screeching and unexpected halt, but sometimes what you have planned isn’t what He…” Lucas pointed skyward “… has in mind for you. Maybe you were supposed to marry Jessie. Ever think of that?”

“No, because I’m pretty sure my conniving cousin and a doddering ol’ pastor who obviously isn’t in his right mind are the reason I married Jessie. If Ashley hadn’t come up with a hare-brained publicity scheme, none of this would have happened.” Chase put the truck in low gear and jumped out to open the gate while Lucas steered the truck through the opening.

Chase closed the gate then hustled to get back in the truck. Once he was inside, he glared at Lucas. “How can you possibly think any of this mess was meant to be?”

“For starters, look at all the publicity this has generated for you.” Lucas held up his hand when Chase started to protest. “I know it doesn’t do one thing for your ability to ride or improve your skills, but it is a good thing, man, and you know it. And don’t forget about the product endorsements you’ll be doing. The advertisements you’ll be in will rake in more money than you ever thought you’d make in five years, let alone one. You’ve got sponsors lining up at your door, quite literally if you take into account the New Year’s party. Then there’s the pretty, sweet gal who is coming here to be your wife.”

Chase scowled as he backed the truck into the open shed where they loaded hay.

Lucas gave him a long look. “Can you honestly say you don’t think Jessie is pretty? I get that she’s not covered in makeup and bling like the girls you usually date, but Lori and I both thought there was something fresh and unspoiled about her.”

A snort rolled out of Chase as he cut the ignition and both of them opened their doors. “You make her sound like a chunk of ripe pineapple.”

Lucas watched as Chase rushed around the truck and pushed the wheelchair up to his door. He slid onto the seat and grinned at his friend. “Just admit you like her.”

“I’m not admitting anything,” Chase said, moving to the tractor so he could set a bale of hay on the back of the truck, leaving it ready to feed to bulls in the morning.

Lucas pushed himself across the frozen ground to the feedlot. Although they’d fed the cattle earlier, the water tank looked frozen. He broke the ice and plugged in the tank heater before making his way toward the barn.

“It’s a good thing it hasn’t snowed yet,” Chase said, catching up to him. “Even though it’s chilly, I’m not sure how you’ll get around once it snows.”

“I’ll manage just fine,” Lucas said, grinning at his friend. “You never answered my question about your wife. Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t think she seemed nice.”

Chase crossed his eyes and made a funny face. “She was nice enough.”

Lucas reached out and gave Chase a shove, making him take a hurried side step to keep his balance. “Come on, man, tell me the truth. She seems like a perfectly kind, genuinely innocent girl. Much different than any you’ve dated since you graduated from high school.”

Chase scowled at him. “Keeping track of them, are you?”

His question was met with a smug nod. “What if I am?” Lucas sobered and glanced up at Chase. “Did you or did you not think she looked pretty at your wedding?”

He’d rather chop off his own tongue than admit it to anyone, especially Lucas, that thoughts of how lovely Jessie had looked at their wedding plagued him. In fact, visions of her in the cotton dress she wore the afternoon he showed her around Las Vegas and the two outfits she’d worn with jeans and boots floated through his head with increasing disturbance. He didn’t want to think about her, to remember how decadent she’d tasted when he’d kissed her, how willingly she’d responded to his touch.

Nope, those were thoughts he’d carry to his grave.

The promise of an influx of funds to pour into the ranch from this year of pretending to be a doting, besotted husband was the only thing that kept him from telling Ashley to forget the whole thing and never bother him again.

By some miracle, Jessie had agreed to go along with the half-hatched scheme they’d developed at breakfast a week and a half ago. If everything went according to plan and the sponsorships and endorsements went as well as Ashley anticipated, he intended to give Jessie more money than what they’d agreed upon.

She deserved something extra for having to give up her apartment and essentially put her entire life on hold for a year. Ashley assured him Jessie could do her graphic design business from anywhere, but he still felt guilty about being the reason her entire world was in a state of upheaval.

With Christmas just a few days away, he knew she’d soon be arriving at the ranch. He wondered if she’d fly into Pasco and drive over with Ashley.

In hindsight, he probably should have gotten her cell phone number and at least checked in with her on her travel plans. He could run into the Tri-Cities to give her a ride if she needed one when she flew in.

Lost in his musings, he almost tripped over Lucas’s wheelchair when his friend stopped to watch an unfamiliar vehicle drive up and park in front of the house.

The SUV was at least thirty years old, even if it did look to be well maintained.

Lucas tossed him a curious glance. Chase shrugged and they both headed toward the SUV. The muted light around them, as dusk slid into darkness, kept them from seeing who drove the vehicle.

“Go on and see who it is,” Lucas said, slowly making his way across the bumpy, frozen ground.

Chase lengthened his stride. He’d almost reached the SUV when the door opened and he sucked in a gulp as the driver slid out.

He sure hadn’t expected the mystery guest to be his wife.

 “Jessie? What in the world are you doing here?” he asked as he closed the distance between them.

“I heard it was supposed to snow Christmas Eve and wanted to beat the storm,” she said, as though that explained everything.

“But… isn’t there… won’t your…” Chase realized he sounded like a stammering fool. He snapped his mouth closed, took a deep breath, and started over. “Welcome to the ranch. Do you need help carrying anything inside?”

She went from warily eyeing him to smiling. “That would be great, thanks. I have a suitcase and bag I’d like to bring in tonight, but everything else can wait until tomorrow.”

Chase followed her around to the back of the SUV. She pulled out a large suitcase with a matching overnight bag. He took them from her and motioned toward the house. “Come on in and make yourself at home.”

“Thanks. I just need to get Tinsel.” She moved around to the passenger door of the front seat and opened it.

Confused, Chase watched her. Why did she need tinsel? If she thought he had a tree ready to decorate, she was sadly mistaken. He’d hoped to avoid having to put one up. If Ashley thought one was needed for the photographs on New Year’s Eve, he’d make a trip to the woods and cut one later.

“I don’t have a tree up, Jessie. Tinsel isn’t something I…” He lost his train of thought as Jessie turned to face him with a big gray cat curled on one arm while she held a cat carrier with her other hand.

“This is Tinsel. Ashley said it would be okay to bring him.” Jessie gave him an imploring look. “She did mention the cat to you, didn’t she?”

Chase would throttle his cousin the next time he saw her. With his bare hands. And maybe even smile while he did it. “No, she did not mention the cat. I don’t suppose she told you I’m allergic to cats.”

Surprise widened Jessie’s expressive eyes. “I’m sorry, Chase, she didn’t mention that at all. She said you have several dogs here on the place, but that they don’t bother the barn cats. If I’d known you have an allergy, I would have made arrangements for Tinsel elsewhere.”

“He can stay in the mud room tonight. We’ll figure out where to put him tomorrow. Come on,” he said, heading toward the front walk.

Lucas rolled up to them and Jessie stopped, giving him a smile. “Hello, Mr. Dunham. It’s nice to see you again.”

“Just call me Lucas, Jessie. Welcome to our little corner of the world. Hope you like it here on the ranch. If you need anything, just let Lori or me know. Our cell phone numbers are on the fridge.”

“Thank you, Lucas. I appreciate that. I hope I won’t be any trouble to you all.”

“You won’t be any trouble. I’m sure of it. Why don’t the two of you come on over to our place in an hour? I know Chase doesn’t have anything fit to eat for dinner and Lori put a roast in the slow cooker this morning. We’ll have plenty.”

“Thank you for that offer, Lucas. It sounds lovely.” She looked to Chase, waiting for him to agree to the plan or offer an alternate one.

He nodded. “Thanks, man. We’ll be over in a bit.”

Chase turned and took the remaining porch steps in two long strides then opened the front door. At least the cleaning service he hired had been there that morning, so the house sparkled and had a pleasant clean aroma as he flicked on the light switch just inside the door and motioned for Jessie to walk inside.

The hardwood floor in the entry gleamed with a recent polish and reflected the overhead lights. Lori had even brought over a big poinsettia plant and left it on a reclaimed barnwood table Chase had set in the entry.

“Oh, my,” Jessie said, wiping her boots, the same cowboy boots she’d worn in Las Vegas, on the mat in front of the door.

His granny had sent it home with him at Thanksgiving as a housewarming gift. Every time he walked in through the front door, it made him smile. To those stepping into the house the mat read, “come in.” If you happened to look at it from the inside heading out, it said, “go away.”

Jessie didn’t notice it, though, as she moved inside, her eyes going to the two-story entry with a wrought-iron chandelier hanging overhead, spilling golden light all around them.

“Your home is lovely, Chase.”

“Thanks,” he said, setting down her bags and placing a hand to her back. “Let’s get Tinfoil settled in the mudroom.”

“Tinsel. His name is Tinsel,” she said, walking beside Chase down the hall and into the spacious kitchen.

Gratified when she stopped and stared at his kitchen, he couldn’t miss the look of awe on her face. A breakfast nook held a table for four. During the summer, it was a great place to sit and look past his back yard to a pasture full of cattle.

“This kitchen is amazing,” she said, moving further into the room and admiring the wealth of cupboards, granite counters, and brand new appliances. “I can’t wait to cook in here.” She turned and gave him a questioning glance. “It is okay that I cook, isn’t it?”

“If you can do more than fry an egg or make toast, it’s better than okay,” he said, offering her a teasing wink as he opened a door into a mudroom that featured a washer, dryer, two big freezers, and hooks by the door where several of his coats and hats hung. He motioned to an open space on the floor near the tall upright freezer. “You can set Tincup down right there. I’ll get him a bowl of water. Do you have food for him?”

“Tinsel. His name is Tinsel and I did bring his food. I’ve also got his water bowl out in my rig. I’ll get him all set up.” She set down the cat then placed his carrier on the floor. Tinsel immediately sauntered over to Chase and rubbed against his leg. Chase sneezed twice and his eyes started to water. Jessie grabbed the cat and placed him inside the carrier. “I’m really sorry about your allergy, Chase. If I’d known I would have…”

He waved a hand at her and backed into the kitchen. “It’s fine. I can handle it for one night, but tomorrow we’ll have to figure out some other arrangement.”

“Okay. I’ll get Tinsel’s stuff,” she said, starting to retrace her steps into the kitchen.

Chase pointed to the back door behind her. “If you go out that door, the porch wraps all the way around the house. It’s a little faster than walking through.”

“Thanks. I’ll be right back.” She opened the door and glanced back at his watering eyes. “I’m sorry, Chase. I…”

“It’s fine. Go get whatever you need. I’ll carry your suitcases upstairs to your room. When you are finished with the cat, just wait for me in the kitchen. There’s a washroom right down the hall if you need it.”

“Thank you,” she said and disappeared outside, closing the door behind her.

Chase gave the cat a cool glare then returned inside the house. He carried Jessie’s suitcases upstairs to the bedroom across the hall from the one Ashley claimed as hers.

He returned downstairs via the narrow back stairs and clattered into the kitchen just as Jessie opened the door from the mudroom and moved inside. She smiled at him, and he felt his heart thud inside his chest. How was he going to survive a year being married to this woman-child? Although he knew she was twenty-five, something about her seemed so young and inexperienced. So full of trust and innocence. Drawn to whatever it was, he forced himself to take a step back and lean against the counter.

“Did you get Tinlid settled in?” he asked.

Her gaze narrowed as her smile melted. “Tinsel is settled for the night. He’s pretty worn out after that long drive.”

“How many hours was it?” Chase had driven all over the country more times than he wanted to count, but he’d never driven straight through from San Diego to Hermiston.

“With breaks for the cat and me, it took us almost twenty-one hours.”

Chase whistled. “That’s a long trip. Did you leave yesterday morning?”

She shook her head and rubbed her hands up and down her arms, as though she was chilled. “No, I had so much to finish up we didn’t get on the road until about seven last night.”

His eyebrows shot toward his hairline. “You drove straight through? How long have you been awake?” In the bright light of the kitchen, he noticed she looked tired. Exhaustion bracketed her mouth and painted shadows beneath her eyes.

“I slept a few hours night before last and a couple the night before that. Honestly, I haven’t had a lot of sleep since I returned from Las Vegas. It’s been a lot of work to pack up my life so unexpectedly.” He watched as she bit her lip and dropped her gaze to the floor. “I’m sorry, Chase, I didn’t mean that to sound like I was upset or anything. I just…”

“It’s fine, Jessie. I understand what you meant and I’m very grateful you agreed to do this. Do you still want to go to dinner over at Lucas and Lori’s place or would you rather go to sleep?”

“I’m starving. If you don’t mind, dinner sounds great.” She took a step closer to him and continued rubbing her arms with her hands. “Is there somewhere I can wash up before we go?”

Finally noticing she appeared cold, he moved beside her and draped an arm around her shoulders. She stiffened, but didn’t pull away from him. “Why don’t you take a hot shower before we head over? It will warm you up and make you feel better.”

“Do I have time?” she asked with a hopeful light in her eyes.

“You’ve got plenty of time.” Chase steered her up the back stairs and to her room. “Will this work for you?” He turned on the light and stepped back as she looked around the sparse room. A queen-sized bed with a matching chest of drawers looked to be antiques. There was a small nightstand with a lamp next to the bed and a desk beneath the window. A bare wooden rocking chair completed the furnishings. The window had blinds, but no curtains, and there wasn’t a single picture hanging on any of the walls. The bed had white sheets and blankets on it, but no bedspread or comforter.

“It’s great, Chase, thank you.” When she turned and kissed his cheek, Chase chalked it up to her being too tired to think straight.

He took three long steps into the room and turned on the light in the bathroom. “Bathroom is here. It has plenty of towels, but not much else.”

“If it has plenty of hot water, that’s all I need right now.” Jessie slid past him into the bathroom and he heard her tired sigh.

“I’ll leave you to it, then. Just come to the kitchen when you’re ready to go.” He closed the bedroom door and hurried down the back stairs to his bedroom. When he was remodeling the house, he’d added a master suite on the ground floor on the opposite side of the house as the kitchen and mudroom. A short hall took him past the room he used as his office. At the end of the hall, he stepped into the master bedroom.

Ashley informed him that someday he might have a wife who would appreciate having a large, roomy suite where she could escape everyone and everything on the ranch. He’d made sure the room was large enough to accommodate not only a king sized bed, a mirrored dresser, and chest of drawers, but there was plenty of room to put chairs around a gas fireplace.

The bathroom featured a deep, jetted tub and a walk in shower along with double sinks. And the closet was big enough to park a small car in, thanks to Ashley’s insistence that it needed to be bigger than what he planned. Right now, his clothes only took up a small portion along one wall of the three walls full of rods and shelves.

He supposed he should let Jessie have this room and move all his stuff into one of the upstairs bedrooms, but he liked being able to look out the bedroom window and watch his cattle. In addition, the outside entry was handy when he needed to run out and check on something.

While Jessie was showering upstairs, Chase jumped into his shower and shaved in record time. He made an effort to tame his normally tousled hair, adding a little wave to the front of it with his comb before he slapped on aftershave.

Realizing he’d just taken one of the fastest showers of his life to impress a girl he was determined to keep an arm’s length away, he made a disgusted face in the mirror before he hurried to get dressed.

After pulling on a pair of worn jeans and a soft thermal Henley shirt, he tamped his feet into a pair of boots. He used his wet towel to wrap up his dirty clothes, taking them to the mudroom where he dropped his shirt and pants in the washing machine. He’d have to wash them separately from the rest of his clothes to keep the cat hair from spreading.

Careful not to disturb the sleeping cat, he quietly closed the mudroom door then sneezed four times in a row. He grabbed a paper towel and blew his nose, then sneezed three more times.

Tintype was going to have to go. Maybe he could talk Lori and Lucas into keeping the cat or maybe the feline would stay in the barn. One thing was for certain, he could not live in the house.

Chase returned to his bathroom and dug through his medicine cabinet until he found some allergy medicine and downed two pills then made his way back to the kitchen.

He’d just filled a glass with water when the creaking of the back stairs drew his attention to Jessie as she rushed down the steps.

Stunned by her appearance, he lost the ability to do anything but gawk at his wife. The glass began to slip through his fingers and he barely managed to set it on the counter before he dropped it.

He swallowed hard and blinked twice, hoping to regain his senses. The few times he’d seen Jessie in Las Vegas, she’d worn her hair pinned up. When she arrived earlier, she’d had it fastened in some sort of messy knot on top of her head.

Now, her hair floated around her shoulders and down her back in glorious, shiny banners of silk. The overhead lights cast rich auburn highlights through the brown tresses.

She smiled at him and his heart slammed against his ribcage, making him rub the spot with his fingers.

“Ready to go?” he asked, forcing words past his thick tongue.

Jessie nodded. “Yes. I hope I didn’t take too long. I tried to hurry.”

“No, you were fine.” He glanced down as she pulled on a heavy sweater and wrapped a scarf the same shade of blue as her eyes around her neck. “Do you need a coat? Will you be warm enough in that?”

“I should be fine, thank you.” She waited while he pulled on a coat he took from the mudroom. He sneezed twice, making her hide a grin. “I promise I’ll find somewhere else to keep Tinsel in the morning.”

“That would be great,” he said, wiping his nose on a paper towel then washing his hands. He placed his hand to the small of her back and guided her down the hall and out the front door.

They’d barely gotten down the wide porch steps when Jessie shivered. Chase gave her a studying glance as they walked away from the house and over to Lucas and Lori’s place. “Do you own a coat?”

“Jackets, mostly, and sweaters. I didn’t realize it would be so cold here.” She crossed her arms over her chest and shoved her hands into her armpits for warmth.

Chase took pity on her and removed his coat, settling it over her shoulders.

“Thank you,” she whispered, tugging the lapels of the coat closed in front of her.

He grinned. “If you think this is cold, wait until you experience the January weather. I’ve been assured it will be awful.”

“This isn’t cold?” she asked, as he guided her down the walk that led to the Dunham family’s front door.

“Cool, not cold.”

“Oh,” she said, clearly displeased by the thought of colder weather approaching.

For the next hour and a half, Lucas and Lori did their best to put Jessie at ease and make her feel welcome.

After dinner, Chase helped clear the table. Lori caught him in the kitchen and whispered her approval of his bride.

“Lucas and I like her, Chase. Despite the circumstances that brought her here, I think you lucked out. Jessie will fit in perfectly on the ranch.” Lori patted his arm then returned to the table.

Chase was glad Jessie earned a stamp of approval from his friends, but then again, she’d be gone in a year, so it didn’t much matter.

How was he supposed to open his life, his home, everything up to the woman, and then send her on her way as if they were polite strangers at the end of the contract? As long as he kept his heart out of the equation, everything should be fine. At least he hoped it would be.

The problem was convincing his heart to listen to reason and not morph into a syrupy mess every time Jessie turned her enchanting gaze his way.

The following morning, the smell of coffee blending with the aroma of bacon wafted through Chase’s dreams. His stomach growled in hunger and he came fully awake, realizing his house smelled like breakfast.

Wondering who had invaded his home, he jumped out of bed and pulled on his jeans. He was halfway down the hall when he recalled Jessie showing up last night, just as he and Lucas were heading in from completing the evening chores.

Rather than backtrack to his room and finish dressing, he walked into the kitchen. His wife stood at the stove stirring a pan of eggs.

“Mornin’,” he said, forking a hand through his hair, hoping he didn’t have a bad case of bed head.

“Good morning.” She turned to glance at him, but her gaze fastened on his bare chest. For the length of several heartbeats, she stared at him. A look of surprise gave way to something else, something that held heat and fascination, if he’d been willing to admit it.

Her cheeks turned a becoming shade of pink and she dropped her gaze back to the pan of eggs she cooked. “I hope you like scrambled eggs. I wasn’t sure how you prefer your eggs, and decided this was probably safe. I remember you ordered scrambled eggs when we ate breakfast together in Las Vegas.”

“I like scrambled or fried, but I won’t eat them if they are runny. That’s just nasty.”

She wrinkled her nose and turned off the burner beneath the eggs. “Agreed. I always thought runny eggs were so gross, like someone had sneezed on the plate or something.”

He hid a chuckle and rubbed a hand across his chest, recalling his half-dressed state. Jessie’s eyes followed every movement of his hand and his ego inflated a bit, hoping her interest meant she liked what she saw.

Even though the rational part of his brain was calling him an idiot, the part of him that wanted her to like him, to be as attracted to him as he was to her, took great pride in her reaction to seeing his bare chest.

He took a step forward but she turned her back to him and dished up the eggs. “I wasn’t sure what time you usually eat, but breakfast is ready.”

“Okay. Let me grab a shirt and I’ll be right back. I usually do part of the morning chores first then come in to eat while I warm up before I go back out to finish.” He hurried to his room, tugged on a thermal shirt and topped it with a flannel shirt before he returned to the kitchen.

Jessie poured a cup of coffee and handed it to him then motioned to the table in the breakfast nook. It was set for two and the mingling aromas of bacon, coffee, and hot biscuits elicited a loud rumble from his empty belly.

“This looks great, Jessie.” Chase held out a chair for her. Once she sat, he settled into the seat across from her. He bowed his head and said grace without waiting to see what she’d do. Her “amen” joined his at the end of the prayer and he smiled to himself before raising his head. “After your long drive, I thought you might want to sleep in today.”

“I’ve always been an early riser,” she said, sipping from a cup filled with hot water.

He looked at it and frowned. “Why are you drinking that?” he asked.

“I’m not a big coffee fan, you don’t have any tea, and I didn’t pack any. I’ll pick some up when I go to the store later today.” She tipped her head toward the refrigerator. “I think we need to acquaint you with fruits and vegetables.”

“Now you sound like Lori, and Ashley, and my grandmother. They are forever foisting fruit and green stuff on me.” Chase gave her a teasing look as he buttered a fluffy biscuit and took a bite. Steam curled around his face as he chewed and he gave Jessie an approving nod. “Your culinary skills pass muster. Thank you for making this nice breakfast.”

“You’re welcome,” she said quietly, then buttered a biscuit and helped herself to two pieces of bacon. “I’m so glad Lucas and Lori agreed to keep Tinsel at their place.”

“Tinspout should be just fine with them. In fact, Lori and Lucas will most likely spoil him rotten.” He winked at her and took another biscuit.

She ignored his purposeful mangling of the cat’s name. “Tinsel didn’t seem too bothered when we took him over last night. What time would be okay to check on him?”

Chase leaned back and glanced out the window. “The lights are on in their kitchen, which means they’re both up. Head over there any time after breakfast. I promise they’ll make him feel at home.” Tired of talking about the cat, he switched to her mention of going into town.

“Do you want to do some major grocery shopping or just pick up a few supplies?” he asked, watching as Jessie took a ladylike bite from her biscuit then dabbed her mouth with a napkin. Actually, it was a paper towel, but the closest thing he had to napkins.

“If possible, I think I better do some major grocery shopping. You seem to be out of just about everything. It’s fortunate you had a can of biscuit dough in the refrigerator, or you’d be eating stale bread for breakfast.”

He glanced down at the biscuit in his hand, convinced Jessie had made it from scratch. His attempts at cooking them never created such tasty results.

“We can go into the Tri-Cities to shop. They have a big warehouse store there, a shopping mall, and just about anything else you might need.”

Jessie’s fork paused halfway to her mouth as she stared at him. She returned the bite of eggs to her plate. “You… you want to go with me?” she asked.

“Sure. I need to pick up a few things at the feed store anyway. Why don’t we plan to leave here around ten? Does that work for you?”

She nodded. “That’s fine. I’ll be ready to go.”

Chase finished eating his breakfast, uncertain when his mouth and brain had decided to part ways. The last thing he wanted to do today was to serve as Jessie’s chauffeur and tour guide. Yet, here he was looking forward to spending time with her.

Unless he got his head on straight and kept it that way, he was going to be in big, big trouble where his accidental wife was concerned.

 

 

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