CELIA

Every Cipher home has come out in the backyard to our training area. Ground they tore the grass out of decades ago, just past the enclosed back-porch, is covered with thick pads in the shape of a large square. The padding is portable for inclement weather. Not drizzle, but when we get a real downpour we drag these pads to our waterproof shed, wipe them down, treat them like some people treat their children when they’re sick.

Jett’s in loose jeans, tight belt, no shirt, barefoot, the bright sun shining on his tanned back.

Sean’s wearing grey sweats and a matching tank top that make his blue eyes even more vivid. I love blue eyes. Like Atlas’s. He’s so lucky he inherited them from his mother, Meg. But his are darker, smoky. Sean’s are bright like sapphires. And right now they’re solely focused on our President. If the audience is making him nervous I can’t tell.

“We don’t expect you to know Martial Arts, because my daughter said you don’t. So that’s off the table. What I want to see is how well you can fight.” Mutual grunts from the audience. Jett holds up his fists and they slowly circle each other. “I want to see how quick your reflexes are, Sean.” Even before he finished the sentence, his fist flew and clocked Sean’s jaw.

Everyone falls silent.

Stumbling back, the newbie shakes his head, refocusing on Jett. He’s not secure about punching the one man who could send him packing. A decision strikes his eyes, and he throws a punch.

Jett bobs under it, grey eyes glinting. “Nice try! Didn’t know if you’d take longer to—” Sean swings again and hits him this time. We all react, especially Jett, eyes flashing with excitement. “Oh, now you’re in trouble.”

They go back and forth, ducking and punching. Jett has the upper hand. But Sean holds his own more than I would’ve expected. It goes on for a while, both men enjoying it. I can see our newbie has the fire in him that we all share. He’s enjoying the sport. Could probably do this for hours. His form is civilian, the stance of a guy in a bar who can throw down. His body is strong and healthy, muscles okay for a normie, but that’ll change if he sticks around. He’ll get ripped, like the rest of us, sculpted by hard work and determination.

Sage catches my eyes from across the way and mouths, he’s hot!

I nod like, you should go for him.

She bites her bottom lip on a grin and resumes her appreciation of the show.

Jett steps back, a show that it’s over. “Not bad. Let’s see if you can handle someone harder than me.” He glances around the Ciphers, rests on Honey Badger, the one nicknamed after the most fearless creature in the wild. “Come in here, Celia.”

Sean reacts, shocked and blinking as he struggles to regain his composure. There’s a titter throughout our club at the bait and switch. People shuffle their weight, exchanging excited glances as I kick off my shoes and walk onto the pads in jean shorts and a brown tank top, hair down to my lower back. Sage accused me of trying to look sexy today. She doesn’t know I did this for Atlas, not Sean.

The newbie and I lock eyes as I square off to him. He mutters, “You mean harder because it’ll be tough for me to hit a girl.”

Jett chuckles, “You’d better try because if you don’t, she’s going to kick your ass in front of everyone, and then where will you be?”

“On a plane back to Arizona.”

“That’s right!” Jett walks off the mat to give us room. As he passes me he winks, giving me permission to use any tool necessary just like if I were on a mission and came up on a man bigger than me.

Poor Sean hates this, and I think it’s hilarious. There’s a war raging inside him as we circle, the struggle dancing across his sapphires. My arms are down, trained body relaxed, secretly ready. It’s confusing him that I don’t have my fists up. He keeps glancing to my hands so I float them up, sapphires darting between them. Dropping to a squat I sweep my leg out against the backs of his knees, take him to the ground with one kick. Everyone starts cheering as he shakes his head and gets back up, this time angry.

He throws his first punch. I lean back and let it fly away before I hook my fist into his ribs and bounce back as he tries to punch me with his left. I take the power of his throw and use it to toss him in that direction. His momentum is what I needed to get him off his legs again. He falls to the ground. More laughter. But this time he’s up, faster, angrier. I’ve got a smile on my face I can’t wipe off. He tries again, lands one punch and reacts like he’s sorry. That’s when I fuck him up.

My father, Tonk Sr., shouts, “That’s my girl!”

Jett jumps in between us. “Time!” As Sean backs up, jaw cut up and blood dripping down his clavicle, Jett asks him, “You see what you did there?”

“I hesitated.”

“That’s right. You hit her, and instead of taking control you backed up and let her attack you. When you’re on a mission and you’re faced with some evil bitch who would take your life as easily as say hi to you, you cannot see her as a woman. She is an opponent, and the mission is all that matters. Got me?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Sir?” Melodi chuckles. Jett shoots her a look. She loses the smile. Mel always gives him a hard time. We know it’s out of love, but Sean is learning about us from everything he sees and experiences. Disrespecting the President is not to be tolerated.

Gotta live inside the rules before you break them.

Jett motions to the house. “Get cleaned up, Sean.”

“I’m good.”

Jett watches him a second. “Alright, Atlas, get in here. This time, I want you to show Sean a few things. Don’t just beat the shit out of him. Teach him.”

“You got it.” Atlas unties his boots and walks onto the pads in faded, ripped, black jeans and matching t-shirt. We fist-bump as I head out and stand beside Sage. She bumps her hip to mine to tell me I did good in there, but my eyes are on them.

The circling begins as Atlas explains some moves he makes as he executes them. “Look here, at my chest. Not at my face. Use your peripheral vision to see everything around you. If you stay locked on these,” he motions to his own dark blue eyes, “you get trapped by their expression. It’s the body, not the face, you gotta watch.”

And watch it I am. These two circling each other, throwing punches, has my ovaries pinging like a slot machine. Sean’s not as ripped as Atlas yet, but he’s six-two and glistening with sweat. Gorgeous. It’s been over a year since I’ve had sex. The hunger. The ache.

Sage bumps her hip against mine again. She winks at me like she knows what I’m thinking.

As our potential recruit hits the mat one final time, Jett shouts, “Time! Go get cleaned up, Sean. No, don’t argue. That’s it for today.”

Newbie clicks his jaw, blood dripping as he nods. The urge to refuse is there, and we all see it. As he heads inside, all eyes are on him and nobody is talking.

Luna slips her arm around Jett and tucks her hand in his back pocket as he lowers his voice. “The guy has a blaze in here.” Jett thumps his chest. “But this isn’t just me deciding. Weigh in on what you just saw.”

Fuse, a member of Dad’s original crew and Melodi’s husband, says, “Agreed. I watched him like a fuckin’ hawk. He would’ve kept going if you hadn’t called it. That’s fine by me.”

My dad nods, “He’s not an evil fuck. He’d have lit into Celia. But he hesitated.”

Luna agrees, “That’s what I thought, too. Had he attacked her without that pause, we wouldn’t want him here. He needs to start with humanity. We can train him when to use it.”

Jett glances to Honey Badger. “He handled your boy pretty well.”

“Atlas was guiding him.”

“You know what I mean.”

“He did okay.”

Luna rolls her eyes, “When are you two going to get past this?”

“When my boy comes home,” Honey Badger growls on his way into the house.

Jett shouts, “You were part of the decision to give them space!”

“Doesn’t mean I didn’t hate it!”

Atlas surprises us by raising his voice against his father. “Stop making Jett pay for it then!” All heads turn to him. The Badger’s eyes go red, but Atlas holds his own. “It was my fault. It wasn’t Jett’s. He’s your best friend. I shouldn’t have said anything. There! It’s out! I fucked up.” He storms off toward the garage, “Shouldn’t have done what I did to Luke. It was a mistake.”

Sage is staring after him.

Tonk Jr., our resident philosopher and my weird brother, announces, “Hard for a man with that much testosterone to admit when he’s wrong. Takes a great deal of courage, and commitment to a better life.”

We stare at him in silence until Honey Badger heads after Atlas. “I’m gonna go talk to my boy!”

Jett’s barely holding it together. In an attempt to calm him, Luna strokes his chest. “Give him some space to come around.”

“I’ll give him all of Louisiana, Tennessee and Timbuktu! I’m gonna take a shower.” Passing me he grabs my forearm. “Great work, Celia. I’m gonna send you on more jobs like Sofia Sol promised. You did good.”

Staring after him, my chest swells with pride. “Thank you!”

“You earned it,” he mutters, swinging the old screen door so wide that when it shuts it’s a thunderclap.

As everyone heads inside, Mom drags my father over. “Tonk, tell Celia!”

“No, Carmen, baby. We talked about this.”

Luna hangs back a second, wondering if she should intervene. She’s the only Cipher mom who goes on missions. Her and her daughter, Sofia Sol, are fierce. Equally as dangerous as the men. I’m the third and last woman who fights from the Louisiana house, and it’s a known thing that I don’t have what they have. There’s a softness in me I get from my mother, Carmen Lewis, who is one of the kindest, gentlest souls to ever walk on Earth. I tend to worry, have too much empathy, and voice it. But that’s over now. I proved myself on a mission recently, showed them I can handle anything that comes my way. Always could have, just didn’t seem like it.

And I’ll be damned if my mother will take that win away from me.

“Why are you trying to stop me, Mom? With three women we’re the highest number any of the houses has in female fighters. That means something. There are no trained women in the Brazil House. All wives, mothers and daughters!”

My brother hovers nearby, and we lock eyes. He gives me a nod that he’s with me. I blink away, the complicated layers of our relationship too much for me right now. I just want my mother to get out of my way.

Dad pleads with her. “Carmen, what are you worried about?” The guy is as wrapped around her pinky as Mom is around his. He just wants her happy, but I’m the child who can follow in his footsteps—not my brother. He’s proud of me. “I’ve been going on missions our entire marriage and you never had a problem!”

“Celia’s different. Luna, help me!”

But Luna Cocker crosses her arms. “I’m sorry, Carmen, but Celia is right. There is a deficit of women who do what we can do, and we are needed. There are some missions only we can go on, to be most effective. Our men are too obvious and sometimes that’s a detriment. We can blend in. That’s valuable. And Celia has proven herself. To leave her at home is illogical when there are so many innocent people she could help.”

Tonk Jr. runs a hand through his dark hair, struggling to stay quiet. “Mom, if you’re worried about her getting hurt, don’t be. It’s not like she’s me. Celia can handle it.”

My mother cries out in hysterics, “That’s not what I’m worried about! I don’t want her to like it too much!” Turning to Luna she bends her body to convey what words can’t. Some sort of charades-communication attempted in the hopes that her best friend will understand and back her up.

Luna’s eyes darken with confusion. “I don’t know what you’re trying to say.”

Mom rushes inside the house, Dad on her heels. “Carmen baby, hold up. Don’t be so upset!”

We stare after them, and I throw out my arm in exasperation, “What is going on with her?!”

“I don’t know,” Luna sighs.

“It’s killing me fighting with her about this. Why is she suddenly freaking out?” Turning to Luna for help I search for reasons, “Maybe it’s the empty-nest thing? But I’m right here! I don’t understand why this is making her hysterical. Have you ever seen her like this?”

Long eyelashes flicker. “Umm.”

Seeing I hit home, I dig, “What happened? Was it about a mission?”

She slowly shakes her head. “It was a long time ago, Celia. You should get something to eat.”

Tonk Jr. asks point blank, “What was she trying to tell you that we couldn’t know? Mom was trying to explain something without saying it aloud.”

“I said I don’t know, so I don’t.”

His lips go tight, and he gives her a nod. “Sorry.”

“I’ll go talk to her.” Luna heads inside.

Alone now I lock eyes with my brother. “What. The. Fuck.”

“We’re not supposed to know everything.”

“That’s really helpful.”

“Are you being sarcastic?”

“Look at my face.”

“Oh. So then yes.” He shoves his hands in his khakis, leaves me standing here alone with my questions.