Fear of Heights

Gregory had made it almost halfway to the top deck, when he heard shouts coming from above. He stepped up his pace and literally jumped from the ladder.

"What is it?" His voice held alarm.

The crewman didn't answer. Instead, he merely turned and pointed upward. Gregory peered in that direction.

Over the edge, he could see a light blue skirt, with a petticoat peeking out from under it. He blinked several times in disbelief.

"How the bloody hell did she get up there?" he demanded.

"Climbed, sir. All the way, with her eyes shut. I shouted at her but she didn't seem to hear me. It's Miss St. John."

"Of course, it is," Gregory growled. "As if I didn't already know." He threw his hands up in the air as he trod forward, toward the ropes. Stopping as he passed a hysterical Chloe, he took her shoulders briefly.

"I'll get her, Miss Tucker. At ease."

Tears crept out from under her lashes, and she nodded. "Lily told me she was up there, sir. I wanted to go up and bring her down, but..."

"But you have the good sense to know it's too dangerous?" he offered.

"I am afraid of heights, sir. Please don't think poorly of me."

Shaking his head, the captain again questioned his decision to allow women on this journey. God was surely punishing him for past sins.

"Gregory!" It was Earl's voice. The captain stopped. Earl never called him by his first name on ship. He turned back, waiting.

"Shall I bring her down?"

Gregory shook his head. "I'll do it. And when I get her down, I'll paddle the daylights out of her delectable little bottom."

Thirty seconds later, he was clearing the top of the wooden platform. Pulling himself up, he stopped and knelt down by her.

"Arabella?"

Her eyes opened long enough to see his face, and she lurched forward, knocking him over on his back, with his head hanging over the side and holding on as if her life depended on it.

"Miss St. John, you're going to push us both to our deaths. Relax."

"Hold me!" she whispered.

In a half-second, he flipped her over, closer to the center of the platform, until he was on top of her. Her hair cascaded over the floor of the crow's nest.

"I am. But I swear, young lady, when I get you down, you'll wish I was nowhere near you. I have only one question for you. Look at me."

Slowly, she raised her eyes to his.

"I want to know why you're up here."

She lowered her gaze. "That's not a question."

"Does the phrase 'you're on thin ice' mean anything to you? Answer me."

She blinked.

"Arabella? Shall I raise your skirts and take my belt to your little bottom with the whole crew standing below and watching?"

"No!" she cried out. "No, sir. But, may I tell you when I get down? I-I can't think right now."

He took hold of her face, staring down into her eyes. Their gazes locked, and a moment later, their lips. He deepened the kiss, and she stiffened for just a few seconds, as he sought her tongue with his.

At first, she seemed surprised. Gregory raised his head, just slightly, and suddenly, Arabella pulled his head down to hers and returned his kiss hungrily. Her tongue danced with his, coaxing it further inside.

A moment later, he raised his head and leaned down, touching his forehead to hers.

"I'm sorry, sir," she said softly. "I didn't mean to…" She brought her eyes downward.

He sighed. "You, young lady, continue to amaze me. Only you would find a way to get into trouble on the upper deck. But the time for exploring is over. Follow me down the rope. Immediately."

"No!" she screamed. A frantic note was present in her voice, and he stopped, staring down into her eyes.

"And on top of getting yourself into trouble, you have the pluck to refuse to follow a direct order?" He was dumbfounded for a moment. Then he studied her pale face and calmed. "Never mind. I forgot for a moment, you aren't one of my crew. Although," he said, a grin creeping over his face. "I can't imagine how I could possibly forget that." He was watching her carefully now, as crimson crept into her cheeks.

"You're afraid of heights," he said.

"A little," Bella said weakly. But it was a lie, and he knew it. Recalling the price for lying to Gregory, she quickly corrected herself. "That's not true, sir. A lot."

"Then, why did you come up here in the first place?"

Her green eyes opened wide, and she scowled up in irritation. "To save Chloe. Why else would I come up to this God-forsaken place?"

"Attitude, Arabella. Chloe is below, terrified for you, because of some rot Lily told her about climbing up and finding you for herself." Gregory gazed from the rope to her, as he considered how to get them both out of this mess. "Luckily, Chloe had enough sense not to do what you did."

"Lily." Bella's voice sounded bitter. "I know fighting aboard your fine vessel is probably frowned upon…"

His eyes met hers. "Men who fight are publicly flogged," he responded.

Bella's eyes, however, held revenge. He could see it. When she spoke, he heard it in her voice, as well. "When I get down from here, I am going to punch her out," Bella said, her eyes closed tightly. "And then I'm going to strangle her. And then I'm—"

The notion of threats coming from innocent little Arabella paused Gregory's reasoning skills. Meanwhile, it seemed Bella had lost hers, too.

When she realized that he was staring down at the ropes below, instead of listening, she scowled up at him. "Pay attention, sir. Lily. I am going to kill Lily Collingwood, if I make it down from here alive. And after I finish with her, I'll throw her overboard. I swear it."

"You will do no such thing. As for making it down alive, it seems there is nothing to do but carry you down myself."

"Carry me down? Have you lost your mind, sir? You can't possibly hold me and use your hands to climb down the rope. Just leave me up here to die in peace. Perhaps you can send up food and water for me, every now and then."

Gregory gave her a brief grin and leaned down quickly to kiss her mouth before lowering his tone. "Listen to my instructions carefully, Arabella. You're going to swing your legs around my shoulders. Tuck your skirt in carefully to protect what the others below will see. I will slowly descend, while you balance yourself there and keep your hands on the rope to help you stay centered."

The look on her face was incredulous. "First of all, a lady simply does not wrap her legs around a man's shoulders. Second, I find it impossible to move from the spot I am in, at this moment. Come back in a few hours. Maybe my body will do what I tell it, then."

"Open your eyes, young lady." His voice suggested it was not wise to disobey. "If I have to tell you again to straddle my shoulders, I will toss up your skirts and paddle your bare backside, and I'll give you ten strokes for every moment you delay."

A sharp whoosh of air escaped. Her eyes barely open, she kept her hands locked on the wall as her legs cautiously moved to comply. The captain did his best to keep her nakedness hidden as he bunched up her skirts at her thighs and lifted her onto his shoulders. He shook his head side to side as, with one hand, he reached to secure himself on the rope. With the other, he had reached up to pull the reluctant Bella toward him.

"Blast," he said, at last. "It's like trying to pry a cork from a bottle of wine. You're fighting me every inch of the way, Arabella. Stop it!" When he finally had her legs locked together in front of him, he started slowly down the rope. She clawed at the wooden floor of the crow's nest, before grasping for the rope to steady herself.

* * *

Bella kept her eyes closed until they were almost all the way down. As they neared the deck, she could see what was happening. The crew had gathered around to watch the rescue. Earl had Lily by the arm and seemed to be preventing her from taking refuge in her cabin behind a locked door. Chloe had her hands clasped together in prayer.

Bella's skirts fell around the captain's frame as he made the last few feet of his way down, bearing the weight of himself and her. Loud pleas to the Savior in Heaven above to have mercy on them filled the air. Gregory talked gently to her all the way down, but he knew she didn't hear him. Up until now, he'd never heard her raise her voice in his presence. But she was certainly screaming now.

When they finally reached the bottom, he lowered her to her feet and held her in front of him. Reaching outward, he had to pull her hands away from the rope. He held them in his, examining the rope burns left on her palms from the terrified grip she'd held.

He turned her in his arms and lifted her chin. Staring down into her eyes, he raised his own briefly, looking around at the stares of the crew.

"At ease, men." His gruff voice to the crew accompanied his glare.

They dispersed, going back to what they'd been doing. He watched them go.

Bella was quiet now and shivering. Her face was crimson with embarrassment. A moment later, he spoke, over her head.

"Earl, would you be so kind as to escort Miss St. John to her chambers?" When Bella started to say something, he glared her into silence. "Chloe, this would be a good time for you and Miss Collingwood to see if you can be of any assistance to the cook. And before you ask, Miss Collingwood, that was not a suggestion. It was an order. Trust me, you will thank me for postponing Earl's discussion with you about any part in this little display you might have had."

Bella held back a whimper, as Gregory held out her wrist and Earl took it. She heard two comments as he began to lead her toward her cabin. The captain's, "It's necessary for me to calm, before I address this," was the first, as she watched his broad shoulders disappear toward his cabin.

The second, came from Earl, who had leaned toward Lily. His voice was low and barely a mutter, but Bella heard it. Judging from Lily's expression, so did she. "Your arse is mine, young lady."

* * *

Earl's Determination

The commander dropped Arabella off at her door, just in time to hear the door to the next cabin slam. He straightened his shoulders. Lily had completely disregarded the captain's orders?

It took him two steps to reach her door. He raised his fist to knock then changed his mind.

"Miss Collingwood? Open this door."

"No." The answer came from inside. But it was muffled.

"Open it, or I'll break it down."

He frowned as he heard weeping from inside. But he heard movement, as well. A moment later, the door slowly opened. He moved inside. Lily was huddled into a little puddle of tears behind the door.

He stood there. Her crying was almost a whisper now, but it was heart wrenching. He reached down and took her shoulders, raising her to her feet.

These were real tears, not something she was putting on for show. She tried to pull out of his grasp, but he refused to allow it.

"Speak to me, Lily. I want an explanation for your tears."

She shook her head. She was trying to speak now but couldn't seem to get the words out. They sounded something like, 'hate myself'.

"You hate yourself? Why do you say that?"

It was moments before she managed an answer. "Dreadful. I'm wretched, terrible."

"No," he said in a growl. "You will never say that about yourself again, do you hear?" He forced her to look at him. "Your behavior was dreadful today, yes. But it's the behavior I'm about to punish you for, young lady. And that can be corrected. No. That will be corrected."

She turned away. "I-I just thought—"

He wasn't sure what made him do it. He pulled her into his arms and took her face in his hands, covering her mouth with his. Slowly, he invaded her mouth with his tongue, and when he let her go, she was crying even harder.

"Shh. Talk to me, Lily. I want to know what's happening in that little red head."

"I don't deserve you," she whispered. "You're so wonderful, and I'm…" Sobs erupted again.

"I know," he said softly, into her hair. "You're engaged."

When she shook her head, his brow furrowed.

"But I'm not," she whispered. "He doesn't want me. I don't think he ever intended to marry me. I realized it, when I found out Bella was supposed to marry him. She had nothing to say about it."

"I saw the letter he wrote booking your passage."

She nodded, wiping her eyes miserably on her long gloves. "I saw it, too. He mentioned nothing about marriage. And I didn't know it, but he had booked my passage as his 'secretary'." Her voice was bitter. "And when I thought about what he'd said—what he'd really said, before he left—he had never mentioned marriage. When he was in London, making plans to marry Arabella, the whole time—he was—he only wanted—" She burst into sobs once again.

Her head was buried into his neck now. He pulled her slight frame closer. "The bastard."

She shook her head into his chest. "It was as much my fault as it was his. I was so stupid not to listen to what he was telling me. And I've been so horrible to Bella. And to Chloe. Neither of them will ever forgive me."

"Are you sure about that?"

"Yes. Why would they?" she said tearfully. "I was the one who sent Bella up to the crow's nest today to look for Chloe. I didn't know how afraid of heights she was, but it didn't matter. It was cruel—"

"You won't know until you apologize. And you will. You'll also apologize to the captain for disregarding his orders."

She lowered her head miserably and nodded.

"Which reminds me," he said, setting her down on the edge of her bed. "I must speak to him before he gets to Miss Arabella. You are not to move until I return."

He barely caught Gregory, as he reached up to rap his knuckles on Arabella's door.

"Captain. I need to speak with you. It's imperative."

Gregory turned irritably. "Now?"

Earl sighed. "Now. Before you so much as set a foot in Miss St. John's chamber."

Gregory glared at him. "All right. My cabin, then."

* * *

Gregory was glad for any excuse not to have to see Arabella at that moment. To have her up in the crow's nest was totally unthinkable. He knew he needed to discipline her for it. He also knew he wanted to do more than discipline.

"I just spent a good deal of time with Miss Collingwood."

Gregory stared. "Miss Collingwood is supposed to be down helping the cook."

"I know. She does, too. But you need to hear what she told me." He stood silently for a moment. "She admitted telling Arabella that Chloe had gone up to the crow's nest and that she was up there, terrified."

"So, she was responsible."

"Yes. I wanted you to know that before you went in to see Miss St. John. But that's not the main reason I wished to speak to you. It's about Claude Picou."

Gregory frowned. "Go on."

Earl turned, staring out the windows. "According to Lily, he made no promise to marry her. She now believes he meant her to be his mistress, instead of his wife."

The captain stared down at his table, scowling. "Just like a woman. She didn't realize that?"

"You're missing the point." Earl turned back and leaned forward. "Which is this. If he allowed Lily to think that, he may have allowed Arabella's father to, as well. Lily seemed to think Miss St. John had no choice in the matter."

Gregory's head came up, and Earl nodded. "Yes. He could plan to ruin her, Captain. When she arrives, her family will be halfway around the world. She will have no protection and no money of her own…" He straightened. "You do see it."

"Bastard."

"My thoughts, exactly."

Gregory rose to his feet, pacing. He stopped. "I won't leave her there."

"Then, what will you do? Take her back to her father?"

"No. I won't do that, either. Her father's as bad as Picou." He smacked a hand down on the table between them. "Damn and blast!" He was pacing again. "I refuse to let anything happen to her. If I have to, I'll…" He stopped.

"You'll what?" The side of Earl's mouth turned up as he waited.

"I'll marry her, myself."

He turned to go toward the door, and Earl did the same. They both stopped.

"I'm on my way to see Arabella," Gregory announced. "And you?"

"You might want to bring Arabella down here. I have an appointment with little miss Lily, who has an appointment with a strap."

"Be my guest."

A moment later, Gregory stood in front of Bella's door. Taking a deep breath, he knocked.

It seemed to take her a long time to open it. Her face was blanched, and she had difficulty meeting his eyes.

He held out his hand. "Come with me, Arabella."

She stared down at his hand as if it were a snake. Finally, he reached down and took her small hand in his.

But she was dragging her feet as they reached the cabin, and he put a hand to the small of her back, sending her inside.

"Captain, I-I'm sorry."

He stood there for a moment, looking down at her. Finally, closing the door behind her, he drew her over to the table and sat down in one of the high-backed chairs. Putting his hands on her tiny waist and spanning it, he brought her in front of him.

"Why are you sorry?"

"For being so hysterical, on the way down. You saved me, and I know I must have seemed so ungrateful."

He was grinning at her. "You were a bit loud. I assumed you had a dreadful fear of heights."

"Ever since I was a child," she whispered.

"Did something happen then? Tell me."

Her shaking became worse. But when she finished, Gregory was furious. "Your father refused to bring you down?"

She nodded. "I'm sure he thought he was doing the right thing, sir."

Gregory's stare down at her was long, but he managed to keep his opinions of her father's parentage quiet. "Tell me, Arabella. What do you know about your father's plans for you in America?"

She whispered, but he was no more pleased with her father's giving her away to a strange man than he had been of the way he handled her climbing trees. She was watching his face now.

"What would you have done, sir? About my climbing trees?"

"I'd have coaxed you down, little by little, gently. And if that didn't work, I'd have gone up to get you."

She met his eyes. "Like you did today?"

"Yes. And when I finally got you down, I'd have explained to you why it wasn't acceptable for you to be up there and paddled your bottom. Hard." He lifted her chin. "Like I'll do today."

"Oh." She tried to turn away, but he made her face him. "I see."

"Do you?"

Her eyes were emerald, now, and she met his fearfully.

"Arabella, there comes a point when you must stop believing what Miss Collingwood—or others—tell you and make your own decisions. You can come to me, if you want an honest opinion. I will never lie to you. I might be wrong. I'm not infallible. But I would never knowingly tell you a falsehood. You could also ask the commander."

"But you weren't there."

"Then, you should have waited. Even if we weren't, you might have seen Chloe before you climbed all the way up there and became paralyzed with fright. I'll confess to you, young lady, there were moments when I was afraid I wasn't going to be able to get you down safely. To be so tiny, you're very strong."

Her expression became miserable, and she sighed, her face crimson.

"I'm sorry."

"Tell me what Miss Collingwood said to you."

She blinked and kept her eyes turned away. "Must I?"

"Oh, yes. She has already admitted it to the commander. You must. I suspect he is dealing with her, as we speak."

She frowned. "If you know that, why are you going to spank me?"

"Because you should have known better than to listen to her. And putting your own life in danger was completely unacceptable.

She gave a soft growl and stomped her heel on the floor.

"That response is unacceptable, too. Are you ready?"

"No." She was blinking.

Gregory picked her up by the waist and lifted her, putting her over his knee. "I'm going to raise your skirts, Arabella."

A keening sound escaped her throat as she felt cool air on her bare skin, and she began to try to wiggle out of his grasp.

"I warn you. There will only be ten swats. But they'll be quite hard. Understand? I want you to count."

She began to cry.

His hand paused, above her bottom. "Arabella, I'm serious, and this is a sobering matter. Remember to count. If you don't, I'll start again. Do you understand me?"

The curly blonde head nodded, and he reached down, bringing her hair over one shoulder. Then, he brought his hand down with a crack. She gasped and her head came upward. "Oh!" Then, there was silence.

"You have two seconds to count, young lady."

"One!"

"The next time, I won't remind you." Another crack across her lower cheeks sounded in the room.

"T-two, sir!"

"Do you understand why I'm doing this?"

"Because you enjoy it," she grumbled under her breath. He brought down three more in rapid succession, and she cried out, "Oh! I didn't mean it!"

He waited a moment. "I believe that remark means we go back to one."

"No, sir! You're being mean!"

"Am I?" Another hard blow, and she was squirming and whimpering.

Gregory looked up as a huge shadow landed on the table in front of him.

Cooper sat there, glaring across at him. Gregory attempted to ignore him.

"Young lady? Are you going to count? Or are you prepared to be spanked like this for the rest of the evening?"

"One," she said with resignation. "Sir."

"All right, then."

He spanked as she cried out in distress. When he glanced back up, Cooper's glare had increased. The huge cat turned and, with his paws, kicked several of the star charts off onto the floor with a flourish. Then, he jumped down onto the floor and took a leap to the window. With one last glare, the animal turned its back on Gregory, head held high, and refused to look at him.

"Damned cat." He glanced down at Arabella. "You have three more to go, young lady." He gave one, then two more, in rapid motion.

She was slumped over his lap, now, and seemed penitent. Her enticing little bottom was bright red, and he stopped to lower his hand to it and rub. She gasped when she felt his touch.

"How many was that?" he asked, leaning over to her ear.

"Nine, sir?"

"It was ten. You're finished."

He couldn't help but smile at her relieved sigh. "Do you understand what will happen if you do something like that again?"

Her voice was trembling. "You'll spank me again."

"Indeed, I will. Never doubt that." He patted her bottom and brought down her skirts, reaching under her waist to lift her upward. Turning her, he cradled her gently. Her eyes were closed.

She had turned her face into his chest and was weeping, and he lifted her higher. "Shh, Arabella. You're forgiven."

Her arms reached around his neck, and he brought her closer. "Thank you," she whispered.

Gregory gave her a chance to relax in his arms. A few moments later, he leaned down, talking into her ear. "Arabella, I need to speak to you about something."

Her brow raised in question, and she gave a slight whimper. But as he opened his mouth to speak softly to her, he saw her eyes close.

"Arabella?" He tapped her cheek softly.

She was asleep.

He rose and carried her to the bed, preferring to let her sleep there rather than to carry her back to her cabin in view of the crew. He had no doubt she was completely exhausted.

Kissing her forehead, he stared down at her for a moment. There was no way he would be able to leave her on the dock, in the presence of a scoundrel like Picou. He had to discuss it with her.

And soon.