Chapter five
The moment I walked inside the centre the next day I knew Jon had told everyone I had a date. He was one of the physiotherapists, and Shane’s right hand at the centre. I’d texted him yesterday to ask him to come and get the tray of cookies since Greg left town with Shane, and I had a date.
Flo ran to greet me and I had to do some very clever manoeuvring not to trip over her as I walked to the main room. Everyone’s eyes were glued on me and they had that I-know-what-you-did-last-night expression on their faces. They were practically drooling to get all the details.
“Mmm, I smell cinnamon rolls,” Jon said as he waltzed into the room and slumped on the sofa.
“No rolls for you, asshole,” I said with what I thought was a genuine scowl.
“What? Why?”
“You told them.” I waved at everyone sitting at the sofas, still watching me with almost identical smirks.
Jon managed to look remorseful. “Yeah, sorry, man. When I turned up with the cookies last night, everyone was like, ‘Where’s Cookie? Is he alright?’ and they wouldn’t stop, so I had to tell them.”
I rolled my eyes as I unpacked the trays. “I’m not talking about it,” I said to nobody in particular.
“Oh, come on, man,” Nick whined. “We’ve been waiting for this for a long fucking time.”
“Yeah, thanks for reminding me how long I’ve been single.”
“So when are you going to bring him here?” Peter asked, completely ignoring my reluctance to talk about it.
“Hm, let me think.” I tapped my chin with my finger, pretending to think about it. “Never?”
Everyone protested at the same time, loudly, and I glared at Jon. He shrugged, grabbed a cinnamon roll from the tray and leaned back on the sofa as though this whole thing wasn’t his fault.
“Come, on, Amir. We need to see this guy that’s finally managed to thaw your heart,” Nick said, placing a hand over his heart theatrically.
Sometimes I really wished everyone wasn’t that okay with my being gay.
The moment the thought popped into my head, I remembered my dad, and wished I could take it back. Of course, every time I thought of him, I wondered where he was. If he had a new family after his first born son had shamed him.
“Give him a break,” Meredith said as she walked into the main room. “Jesus! You’re worse than a bunch of old hags.”
To their credit, everyone finally shut up and even managed to look chastised.
“Nick, you’re up.” Meredith walked back towards her office and Nick reluctantly followed.
“I should probably get going,” Peter said, glancing at his watch.
Soon, the main room emptied of everyone but me and Jon. Flo lay at his feet, her ears twitching as we talked, but otherwise not moving.
My phone vibrated in my pocket and I took it out to find a text from Greg. He’d sent me a couple of texts to let me know they were doing okay. According to that last message, they were coming back in a couple of days, and Shane was doing much better.
“Shane says hi,” I said as I put the phone back in my pocket. “He’s coming back day after tomorrow.”
Jon nodded before grabbing another cookie from the tray. “I texted him today to tell him to take his time. We’re fine here. He hasn’t had time off in a while, running himself ragged.”
“How bad is it?” I asked, and Jon knew what I meant.
“Without a serious backer we won’t survive much longer.”
Damn it. These people couldn’t afford to lose the centre. It not only provided the medical treatment they needed, but also a place to hang out, spend time with friends. With people who understood what they were going through. It was a life saver for them.
I knew it had been for me.
“We need to figure something out,” I said. Jon hummed in agreement as he ate his cookie, the sound flat and so hopeless that I wondered if it was too late.
******
I heard my phone beep in my pocket as I was hanging Flo’s lead on the hanger in the hallway. She whined and thumped her tail, watching me eagerly with her huge brown eyes.
“What do you want today, eh? The turkey and veg or the kibble?” I asked, squatting down to pet her and trying to remember if I actually had any dry dog food left. Oh, well, turkey and veg it was, then.
She licked my face in response and ran towards the kitchen. By the time I put her food and water in her bowls, and managed to make dinner for myself with the meagre contents of my fridge, I’d completely forgotten about the text message.
I really needed to go grocery shopping. I’d been putting it off for a while now, mainly because I forgot about it until it was time to make dinner. Grabbing a piece of paper and a pen from the drawer next to me, I started jotting down what I needed to buy while I was eating.
Another insistent beep sounded from my jeans pocket. I took it out to find two messages from Jay.
You free Friday night? I’d love to see you.
Actually, I wanna see you before Friday, but my classes schedule is packed. Join me for a run tomorrow morning?
I smiled as I read his texts. It still felt surreal to me that a gorgeous guy like Jay was not only interested in me, but had no problem showing it. I texted him back.
Sure. 6am? P.S. I’m free on Friday. What do you have in mind?
My meal and shopping list forgotten, my stomach fluttered as I clutched my phone, waiting for Jay’s reply.
OK. I’ll meet you in the park, where I first saw you with Flo. P.S. It’s a secret.
Grinning like an idiot, I tossed my phone on the counter and headed to the bathroom. A long, hot bath sounded heavenly right now.
It was a shame I was taking it alone.
******
I hadn’t been this excited for an early morning run in a while, and although regular exercise was vital for me, it had turned into a habit I never actually thought about.
Flo eyed me curiously, inclining her head to the side as I whistled while I got dressed. A trained, intuitive therapy dog like her could easily sense my excitement, but she was also confused.
“We’re meeting Jay, girl,” I said as I crouched down in front of her and scratched her behind the ears. She whined happily, licked my face and bolted towards the door.
I guess I wasn’t the only one Jay had managed to charm.
Outside was miserable. Cold and wet, the sun not yet fully risen behind the clouds. It had rained all night, the moisture still clinging to every surface, making the air unpleasantly humid.
Jay was already waiting for us when we got there. I glanced at my watch to make sure we weren’t late; we were five minutes early. He was dressed in black sweats and a fleece hoodie, his hair caught in a loose ponytail on the nape of his neck. Several strands had already escaped, curling around his face.
“Hey,” Jay said when we reached him. I greeted him back but I didn’t know what to do next. Shall I hug him? Kiss him? Pat him on the back?
Jay saved me from any awkwardness by inching closer to me and giving me a sweet peck on the lips. He did it so smoothly, so easily and without any hesitation, that I couldn’t help the grin that spread slowly over my lips.
“What?” Jay asked, his own lips quirking up as he bent down to pet Flo.
“Nothing.” He raised an eyebrow at me. “I’m just happy to see you.”
We ran at a steady, comfortable pace for about half an hour. This early, the town was deserted, save for a lone car driving by in the distance. We kept to the paths between the buildings and the open spaces the many parks in Cambridge provided. I could never understand why people would go out running along the road just to get their lungs filled with car fumes.
When we got to Midsummer Common, Jay slowed his pace, angling his body so that he could make eye contact.
“Warmed up yet?” Jay asked, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.
“Do you usually do a five mile warm up?” I asked him.
Jay shrugged as if it wasn’t a big deal. The guy had the lithe physique of a runner, but then again, it could be genes or putting the hours in the gym.
“How about a little race?” He said with a cheeky smile.
“Seriously?” He nodded. “You wanna race me? The ex-soldier? The guy that’s been running nearly every day for the past two years?”
Jay tried to hide his grin with a casual shrug, but I caught it before he managed to turn away from me.
“If you need to list your credentials that only tells me you’re scared.”
“Alright,” I said, catching up to him and turning around to jog backwards. “But remember: when I win with a humiliating advantage, you were the one who asked for it.”
“You’re so sure you’ll win that I’m thinking we should spice things up a little.” He licked his lips and I couldn’t resist fixing my eyes on that perfect, pouty mouth of his. Of course, he noticed, and played it to his advantage. “If I win,” he paused, holding my eyes, “you’ll invite me over to your place tonight and teach me how to make salted caramel brownies.”
My eyebrows rose and I faltered, nearly tripping as I ran backwards. Jay didn’t make any excuses for his suggestion, keeping his steady, playful gaze focused on me.
We both knew what he meant.
“Okay,” I said when I managed to regain my jogging pace. “And if I win, which is way more likely, you’ll tell me what you’ve got planned for Friday night.” I really didn't like surprises.
“Deal.” Jay extended his hand and we shook. He slowed down, eventually stopping, and bent to stretch his muscles. “We run from here to that bench over there.” He pointed to a lonely bench, probably two hundred metres away across the park. It was a straight, unobstructed run – there was no way Jay could beat me.
Then again...
“Ready?” Jay said, startling me out of an unexpected thought.
We took positions, counted to three and set off running. Jay was fast, I could give him that. He wasn’t faster than me, though. But the nagging thought that I really wanted him to win the race kept pushing its way to the front of my mind. The moment he’d mentioned inviting him over to make brownies, I’d imagined him, covered in brownie batter and caramel, licking his fingers clean, laughing as he brushed the hair off his face, smudging caramel on his forehead.
I imagined wrapping him in my arms, feeding him a brownie straight from the oven, then kissing the caramel smeared on his lips. A whirlwind of images followed – Jay lying in my bed, watching me with hooded eyes; kissing his neck, his jaw, his stomach; Jay quivering under me as I moved on top of him, a desperate moan escaping his swollen, red lips.
Running with a hard on was not comfortable.
I slowed a little, trying to adjust myself, and letting Jay take the lead. He beat me by half a second, at the most, punching the air as he flew by the bench. His skin was flushed, his eyes wild with the adrenaline coursing through his blood.
He was irresistibly beautiful.
I took the distance between us, folding Jay’s body into mine, moulding our mouths together. He must have expected the onslaught because his lips parted readily, sucking my tongue in. I groaned, licking into his mouth, trying to get more of his taste. My hands tightened around him and he moaned, sliding his fingers into my hair, pressing his body into every inch of mine.
“God, Amir...” Jay murmured between kisses, pushing me backwards until the back of my knees hit the bench. I fell onto it and Jay followed, straddling my lap. “You lost on purpose,” he whispered, his teeth grazing the skin under my ear. “You want me?” The soft words, followed by his warm lips on my skin nearly undid me.
I thrust my hips up, my hands spanning on the small of his back, then sliding lower until I cupped his firm ass. Our clothed erections slid together, the friction so delicious and yet not enough.
“Of course I want you,” I managed before his mouth slammed over mine again.
“You didn’t come in the other night,” he said softly, hiding his face in my neck.
I pulled back slightly, my hands moving away from kneading his ass to cup his face.
“You think I don’t want you because I didn’t take the first opportunity to jump into bed with you?”
Jay lifted his shoulder in an elegant shrug, casting his eyes down.
“Nobody’s ever done that before. I didn’t know what to think.”
I searched his face for any clue how to react. Inside, I battled to keep the anger at bay. Was that what Jay was used to? A bastard who’d fuck him the first chance he got?
He met my eyes uncertainly, only managing to keep eye contact for a few seconds.
“I don’t want a quick fuck from you, Jay.” I said, brushing my thumbs over his cheekbones. “I want to teach you how to make cookies, and feed you brownies, and get to know you, and wake up next to you on a rainy Sunday morning.”
Jay blushed over his already flushed skin. He smiled as my thumb followed a line to his mouth, tugging his lower lip down. His tongue peeked out and licked my finger, making me groan. I tugged him down for another kiss, gentler this time. Reassuring.
“But if...” I began when our lips separated. “If you’re only looking for a quick fuck tell me now before I’ve fallen too deep.” I swallowed thickly, surprised at the words that had tumbled out of my mouth.
In the few seconds it took Jay to respond I felt as if my skin had been peeled raw. I’d never been that open with another man, especially not so soon after meeting him. But there was something about Jay... something that called out to me. When he looked at me with those gorgeous blue eyes I felt my world tilting. Something woke inside me, something I didn’t know I even had.
“I’m not looking for a quick fuck,” Jay said, leaning down to brush his lips over mine. “I want all of those things too.”