Chapter 3
Caitlin kicked the door shut behind her, marched into the kitchen, and dropped her gear on the table. She felt like punching someone or something since the anger she experienced earlier hadn’t diminished. In fact, as time went on, her temper increased even more.
Jessie sat in the living room poring over the new case files from her clinic. At the sound of Caitlin’s bag hitting the wooden table, she looked up and studied her friend’s face for a split second.
“Hard day at work?” she asked, frowning.
“Last day at work,” Caitlin replied and started to walk to the bathroom. “I quit my job.”
“What happened?” Jessie lifted her brows in surprise. “Do you want to talk about it?”
Caitlin shook her head. “No, not right now.” She wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone. And while she was steaming mad, she also felt dirty. “I need to take a long shower.”
Walking into the bathroom, she undressed quickly and jumped into the tub. She adjusted the shower head and welcomed the hard, punishing stream of water. She really needed the shower, because as pissed as she was, she still couldn’t stop the terrible scene that played in her head. She knew even before entering into the food industry that it was dominated by men and that sexism was rampant. She could take the occasional crude remark and laugh at a dirty joke, but she couldn’t take sexual harassment, especially when it came from her superior. But everything had happened so quickly this morning. She was in such a shock that all she could do was to stare at her boss. She had once heard that Chef groped a coworker’s breasts but that woman was called a slut, so no one thought much of it. With the events that occurred, what label would Caitlin be given?
She tilted her face up, feeling the sharp sting of the water as it mixed with her tears. The sound of the rushing water drowned out her sobs, and she was glad since she didn’t want Jessie to hear the turmoil that made its way out of her system.
Caitlin didn’t realize how long she stood under the shower until she noticed her fingers had started to prune. Reluctantly, she shut off the valve and dried off.
When she emerged from the bathroom a few minutes later, she felt much better. She made her way to her bedroom, and as she walked past the common area, Jessie glanced up. It appeared as if her friend wanted to speak, but something on Caitlin’s face must have stopped her.
Pretending not to notice Jessie’s hesitation, Caitlin continued into her untidy bedroom and placed her phone on the dresser. Then, spying a pile of books on the chair by the window, she went over and picked up her copy of Mastering the Art of French Cooking. She had gotten the worn and well-loved cookbook while in college. She probably knew everything about Julia Child, and even bought a movie poster of Meryl Streep who had portrayed the iconic chef in a movie.
Caitlin moved to stand in front of the poster and studied the smiling actor. No doubt about it, Julia Child was her hero. The woman had a passion for food and wove that love into her career. Caitlin wanted to do the same. She turned to place the cookbook on her shelf and sighed. At the rate she was going, she wasn’t going to have any career.
She cleared the discarded clothes from her bed and retrieved her cell phone from the dresser. She threw herself on the mattress and unlocked her phone. Caitlin still wasn’t in the mood to contact her grandmother, but at least she knew that the earlier call wasn’t an emergency. Her grandmother had wanted to tell Caitlin that they received the last check she’d sent. The prospect of returning her call and putting on a cheerful voice was too much to bear. But Caitlin knew that if they didn’t hear from her soon, they would worry. The best she could do right now was to email them.
When she logged in to her email account a few seconds later, she was surprised to see that there was a message from her grandfather.
Caitlin, thanks for sending us the money. It really helps. We miss you very much and hope everything is going well with work. We’re proud of what you’re doing with your life. Maybe you can come home and visit us. Do you know when that will be?
Love,
Grandpa
Caitlin’s eyes started to blur at the words. She had lived on her own for many years, but sometimes she still missed them intensely. Her grandparents had supported while she grew up, and she loved them to death. For a moment, an overwhelming sense of homesickness blanketed her. Her plan was to fly out and visit them, but now that she was jobless, money was going to be tight for a while. She had no idea when she would ever see them.
When she opened her eyes again, she noticed that a new email had arrived. It was from her friend Sarah who she’d worked with in San Francisco. Caitlin hadn’t heard from the woman in a long time. What did she want? Tapping on the screen, she opened the message. But when she read it, she immediately felt her stomach roil. Somehow Sarah had gotten a job promotion. Caitlin reread the announcement, staring at it in disbelief. How was this possible? They had started at the company around the same time, but Sarah was always on the slower side. It used to annoy Caitlin when her coworker came to bug her with questions on how to field calls. The woman had also hounded other coworkers, and now she was a manager of a call center?
“Of all people!” Her hand dropped to the mattress and she stared at the ceiling. Meanwhile, a dark, heavy feeling settled in her chest, and she tried hard to stop herself from crying. “I can’t believe she’s doing better than me. This just sucks.”
A light tap sounded at her door, and a second later, Jessie poked her head in. “Are you talking to yourself again?” she asked. “You know you don’t have to, right? You can talk to me.”
Caitlin reached up and wiped the tears that gathered at the corner of her eyes. She didn’t want anyone to see her crying, but she had known Jessie for a long time, and she was more like a sister than a friend.
“Today was the worst day of my life,” she said, her voice sounding a little hoarse.
“So I gathered.” Jessie walked into her room and sat on her bed. “You want to tell me about it?”
Caitlin stared at the framed landscape photograph that Jessie had given her as a gift. It hung near the window. Every time she looked at the oceanic scene, she felt grounded. But today it had no power to make her feel better.
“Chef groped me,” she said, her voice devoid of all emotion.
Jessie’s eyes widened. “You’re kidding me.”
“I wish,” Caitlin said, letting out a shaky breath. “He insulted my knife work, and he then grabbed my crotch.” She could feel his meaty hands touching her private area, and her mind cringed at the unpleasant memory. “I was so pissed that I quit. Now I’m not so sure if that was such a great idea.”
“What are you going to do now?” Jessie became still, her eyes searching Caitlin’s. She could read the concern and outrage on her friend’s face, but Caitlin didn’t want her sympathy. She only wanted to continue wallowing in her misery.
“I don’t know.” She picked up her phone again and began to scroll through the rest of her email. An ad for a culinary course caught her eye, and she tapped on the link to open it. “I haven’t thought of things so far ahead.”
Caitlin scanned the ad. The culinary students looked at her as if they dared her to join their ranks.
“You know, you should sign up for the class,” Jessie said.
Caitlin glanced up, surprised that Jessie was looking over her shoulder and reading the promotion.
“The course costs $10,000,” she said. “I don’t have that kind of money to blow. Besides, even if I graduated from the school, there’s no guarantee that I’ll find a decent job.”
Jessie took her phone and studied the ad more closely. “Look, it says here that there’s a special job placement for the number one student in the program.”
“Really? I didn’t see that.”
Jessie handed the device back to her, and Caitlin rescanned the advertisement. And there it was. Three-quarters down the page was a section that detailed a job placement at Signatures, one of Hawaii’s prime restaurants.
“I think you should do it.”
“I don’t know…” Caitlin was always good at school, and she had passed her college courses with flying colors. But the cost of this particular program seemed crazy high.
“I’ve never known you to be so indecisive,” Jessie said, giving her an exasperated look. “Ever since I’ve met you, you’ve had a love of food. Whenever you speak about the subject your face brightens. Do you want to give this all up?”
She fell silent, knowing that her friend was right. Since Caitlin had discovered her passion for cooking, she’d thrown everything aside in order to pursue it. Did she want to stop now?
“This is a serious opportunity,” Jessie said, echoing Caitlin’s thoughts. “You can put down what you can and then place the rest of the payments on your credit card. You need to follow your passion since you’ll never know where this will lead you.” She paused, making sure she had Caitlin’s attention. “Maybe, in the end, losing your job and attending cooking school are exactly what you need right now.”
Caitlin looked at the ad again. The image of the smiling students wearing their toques hit home, and she imagined that years from now she would become an executive chef at a top tier restaurant. The Hawaiian School of Culinary Arts was an elite and well-respected cooking institute in Hawaii. It attracted students from all over the world. It was steeped in French traditions, and since it was in Hawaii, it also had Polynesian influences. If she thought about it, she knew that it wasn’t every day that a person could secure a job placement at a leading restaurant. All she had to do was sign up for the course, get the highest grade, and then accelerate her learning by working at one of the best restaurants on the island. Her career would skyrocket after this. Hope began to stir in the middle of her chest.
“Listen, Nate is in town and I have to go downstairs and meet with him in a few minutes,” Jessie said as she glanced down at her watch. “But do me a favor, and think about attending the school, okay?”
“All right, I’ll think about it,” she said, nodding her head.
“That’s my girl,” she patted Caitlin’s cheek and smiled. “I know you’ll make the right decision.” She hesitated for a second longer as if she wanted to say something else.
“Just go before your boyfriend blames me for holding you up.”
Jessie laughed and exited the apartment.
Caitlin barely heard the door close when she gave in to the sudden need to study the information in careful detail and on a larger screen. She retrieved her laptop from the side table and brought it to the bed. Switching it on, she typed in school website. She devoured the testimonials of the alumni, and pored over the class descriptions. All the while her excitement increased.
The school promised everything that she wanted in a career. Here she would learn the essence and spirit of French and Polynesian cuisine. The school offered an internationally recognized, well-rounded education, and she would gain the hands-on experience she needed in order to make it in the competitive culinary world. Food made her happy while she ate it, and it gave her joy when she cooked it. This was what she wanted her life to be about. But unfortunately everything she knew about cooking she’d learned from her cookbooks. She had hoped that working at the hotel restaurant would advance her learning, but it did no such thing. At the resort, she was only an insignificant cog in the machine. But if she went to the culinary school, she would learn a lot more; the course would fill in all the gaps in her experience as she worked with some very talented and highly trained chefs.
She could take the intensive course and finish the classes in five weeks instead of one year. Her heart started to race as she pictured herself at the end of her studies, a diploma in hand and her fist pumping into the air. And while the program was expensive, it would be worth it in the end. From what she could see, her future was truly bright.
With hands trembling with excitement, Caitlin clicked on the payment link and plugged in her credit card information.
Caitlin was about to close the browser when it occurred to her to skim through some job listings. She quickly logged on to a popular job site and scanned the offerings. Almost immediately a posting for a part-time cooking school instructor caught her eye. As far as she could tell, she possessed all the qualifications and the pay was decent too. All she had to do was host birthday parties for children and teach them a little about cooking. Would it really be hard to teach the keiki to prepare simple meals? Feeling good about the opportunity, she followed the link and filled out the online application. When she was done, she pressed submit. She threw herself back on the mattress, a big smile spreading across her face. The timing was perfect. She was determined to get this job and start socking away some money before classes started in four weeks.