The meeting with Reuben had left Adelaide feeling a little peculiar. He had come to speak with her for no particular reason whatsoever, and though the conversation had flowed around topics of music and literature, and the new opera that had come to the Royal Opera House, she felt empty afterwards. No renewed fluttering of affection had manifested in her breast. Instead, she felt oddly desolate.

He is kind to you, Adelaide, she told herself. He may have a dark past, but he is fond of you and he seems to wish to make amends for past transgressions. He is amusing and sharp-witted. You can be happy together. You must stop with these fantasist notions of true love. Until a few days ago, you did not even know you were capable of such love, so forget about it. It can only come to trouble, otherwise. You fought so hard for this engagement… do not ruin it now.

“Are you well, my darling?” Ephraim asked, after bidding Reuben farewell.

She nodded. “Of course, Papa. What did you wish to discuss with the Duke?”

“I wanted to discuss setting a wedding date with him,” he replied stiffly. The color seemed to drain from his face.

“Did it not go well?”

“No, no, it did. I had hoped to have you married before we departed for Yorkshire,” he said. “It seems we shall have to have the wedding in the country, for he is not keen to marry within the next fortnight. He has some business to attend to, I believe, that is keeping him somewhat busy.”

She nodded. “I am in no rush.”

The words rang true in her head. Not too long ago, she had desired a swift wedding, but that was no longer the case. If the day dawned too soon, she was not sure she could go through with it. In her mind’s eye, she envisioned herself in her wedding gown and felt a stab of panic. Reuben would meet her at the end of the aisle, and her fate would be sealed.

“No… I suppose it is prudent to take one’s time in these matters.”

“Are you feeling better?” Adelaide asked. “You look terribly pale again.”

“I feel somewhat queer. I may retire to my chambers for the rest of the evening—I hope you do not mind? I have seen so very little of you these past days.”

She smiled. “You go and rest, Papa. I shall be quite fine, keeping myself amused. Besides, Mama is due home soon.”

He leaned over and kissed her gently on the cheek, before taking to the stairs and disappearing across the landing. She listened to his footsteps on the floors above, before his door squeaked and everything fell silent. Adelaide was alone again, with nothing but her racing thoughts for company.

After half an hour in the library, she was unable to bear the weight of solitude any longer. Running upstairs to her chambers, she took the latest letter from the drawer and descended once more. Decisively, she crossed the entrance hall and hurried out of the door, explaining to Daniel that she was going to visit with Jasper. It was not unusual for her to do so, considering their friendship.

He seemed surprised to see her. “Adelaide? I had not expected to see you today.”

“I have just come from the Green residence,” she lied. “Leah had briefly returned to collect some of her things, and I waited as she wrote you a reply. She has gone back to her family, and she was sorry that she could not stay longer, but she sent her fondest wishes to you.”

A smile broke out upon his face. “I had not anticipated a reply so soon.”

Adelaide handed him the note. “Might I stay whilst you read it?”

“Certainly.” He directed her through to the drawing room, where they sat in amiable silence as he devoured the letter. As soon as he had finished, he released a slow sigh of contentment. The response thrilled and wounded Adelaide in equal measure.

The letter did not come from you, remember? she chided herself.

“What does she say?”

He chuckled. “She writes so wonderfully. It is almost as though I am in her memories, enjoying them alongside her. She speaks of Christmas and of childhood recollections. They are remarkably vivid.”

“How wonderful.”

“She asks about you,” he said unexpectedly.

“Oh?” Adelaide could hardly believe that she had dared to put the question into the letter. Indeed, it had been her own curiosity, getting the better of her. She had never seen Jasper in a romantic light, but she was eager to know if he had ever viewed her in such a fashion.

“I shall not tell you what it says, but she appears to have reconsidered our friendship,” he explained. “I am glad of that, for I do not know what I might have done if she had forced me into casting you aside.”

“You have said so before.”

He nodded. “I am sorry for that. You know I could never do such a thing to you, for you are so very dear to me. You have been my constant companion all these years and I am grateful for it.” His gaze lingered for a moment, confusing Adelaide. A flicker of something moved behind his eyes—an emotion she could not read. It seemed to fall somewhere between sadness and wonder.

“I am grateful, too.”

“I have been meaning to say something for a long while now,” he said nervously. “When you stood on the front steps after you feared that the Duke of Bradford had broken his promise…I should have done more to comfort you. I wanted to do more, but I did not know what to say or do to ease your suffering. I would have done whatever I could, if I had only known how to behave.”

She stared at him in surprise. “You did more than you realize. Having you there, by my side, was a comfort in my darkest time.”

“It has been many years since I have seen you cry, Adelaide. It wounded me to see you in pain. I wanted to reach out and wipe them away, or take your hand, or…I do not know. I simply have to tell you that I wanted to do more.”

She had never heard Jasper speak like this before, and the shift in his words stirred something inside her. She thought of the letters, and the emotions that she had poured into them. They had come from her heart, and yet Leah was set to gain the recognition for them. He adored the Miss Green that she had fabricated, not realizing that the sentiment was hers.

“I understand that you did all that you could,” was all she could say.

“There is something about Miss Green that reminds me of you,” he went on, with a shy smile. “The way she speaks—her vigor and her candor—they are reminiscent of your character. Naturally, you would never say the things that she has said, for you loathe romanticism in all its forms. I have never seen this side of her before. It is entirely pleasing.”

“That is wonderful news,” Adelaide replied, her heart weirdly heavy. “I am glad that she is able to bring you some joy, even from afar.”

“I do wish she would visit again,” he sighed. “Had I known she was back in the city, I might have ventured to meet with her. I have to see if the young lady on the page is the same young lady in the flesh. It is easier to say certain things in letters, I feel. I am certainly more forthcoming than I am in person.” He laughed tightly, as though embarrassed.

“Have you offered hope of a proposal?”

He shook his head. “No, I have not. I fear she may end up engaged to another if I do not move more quickly. Her mother is applying some pressure, or so it would appear. She talks of suitors and of duty. In truth, I do not know what I ought to do.”

“What does your heart say?”

He shrugged. “It is conflicted. I cannot make the two ladies coincide—the Miss Green in these letters is entirely more enchanting than the Miss Green who has visited with me. She is very endearing in person, do not mistake me, but I cannot correlate this voice with the one that I already know. She seems almost like a stranger… but one that I should love to get to know better.”

“Will you continue to write to her?”

“I must. I must venture deeper into her nature and reveal the truth of her character through these writings,” he said effusively. “For, if this is truly her, without the restraints of societal courtesy, then she is precisely the sort of young lady that I have been seeking all these years. She is exactly the lady that I would wish to make my wife.”

Adelaide froze. “I never thought to hear you speak of such things so plainly.”

“Something has been moved within me, Adelaide. I feel I am becoming a new man.” He laughed, though the sound stilled as he looked toward Adelaide. She could not force a smile onto her face. “You do not approve?”

“If she continues to capture your heart…I think only you may decide on the course of action.” Her own heart pounded in her chest, an icy feeling sliding through her veins.

Can that be… envy? Surely not, Adelaide. You cannot envy Leah, her position in Jasper’s heart. He adores her well enough. She may be unworthy of him, given her transgressions with Alastair McGillivray, but you cannot sway his opinion. You must control yourself. This is the writing speaking, not you. You were given a taste of the romantic and it is intoxicating—this may be so, but do not give it any weight. If you loved Jasper, you would already know… would you not?

Confusion speared through her mind, a tangle of emotions that she did not know what to do with, nor did she recognize. She had never been jealous of anyone, least of all Jasper’s admirers. Indeed, she could not comprehend the process of her own brain. It seemed to have gone quite mad.

“Is something the matter?” he asked softly.

She shook her head. “No… I had an encounter with the Duke of Bradford and it has left me somewhat at sea.”

“How so?”

“I was under the impression that affection was supposed to grow and strengthen over time, but I could not muster an ounce of it when he came to visit today,” she confessed, though she had no idea why. This was not the kind of thing she usually discussed with Jasper. “I can barely admit it to myself, but… there is a part of me that dreads our union. My father sought to rush the wedding, but the Duke said he could not wed me within two weeks. He desired a longer engagement. I must tell you, I discovered that I was grateful to hear it.”

He stared at her in silence for a moment. “You do not believe you will be happy at his side?”

“I do not know, Jasper. I find myself in a curious state of confusion.” She almost blurted out the truth, but fear held her back. He would likely despise her if she confessed that she was the letter writer. And besides, what was she supposed to say to him? She did not know her own feelings, how could she describe them to him? They were so new and surprising… and utterly terrifying.

“What has brought such bemusement upon you?”

“I cannot say.”

He frowned. “You are usually so clear in your decisions. Indeed, you have told myself and your father that our input is unwelcome, where the Duke of Bradford is concerned. You seemed so content. You confessed that you admired him. What has changed?”

“I am not certain anything has changed,” she replied quietly. “There have simply been revelations that I do not think I can ignore.”

“About the Duke?”

No… about you.

“Yes.”

“What revelations?” His expression darkened. “Has he done something to you? Has he harmed you?”

She shook her head, feeling hot tears rise. “No, he has not. He has been courteous and kind to me. Indeed, I find it hard to believe that he can belong to the monstrous tales that people tell me of his past. He calls me his savior, did you know that?”

“I did not.”

“The truth is… I feel as though I will be sacrificing myself in order to save his soul.”

He leaned forward and took Adelaide’s hand in his. “Oh, my dear friend. I am sorry for this.”

“I cannot break the engagement. I will not. My family is relying upon this match, whether they realize it or not.” She stifled a sob. “I know my father does not like the Duke, but he shall learn to… as shall I.”

“It is not too late,” Jasper urged.

“You must ignore me,” she begged. “I am overwrought after the day I have had. I will return to my house and sleep away my qualms. Please, write to Miss Green. Answer her questions. Find your heart cheered. I have brought this mistake upon myself, and now I must see it through.”

“Adelaide, please, it is not too late to stop this. It is within your power if you desire it,” he urged.

She turned to him, her heart breaking. The sudden realization gripped her chest in a vise. She opened her mouth to say something, but the words would not come out. Oh, but it is, Jasper… it is much too late. Your heart belongs to another and I would not seek to claim it for myself. I can hardly admit that I want it for my own. I never thought to discover a man I could love. Yet here you were, all this time, right in front of me.