I YAWNED AND LEANED AGAINST THE KING, pressing my head further against his chest. “This man really doesn’t like you.”
Bel wrapped his arms around my frame. He asked in a tired voice, “How many druids have come and gone so far?”
“Too many to count.”
“This is bullshit.” He lifted his right foot and slammed it down on the ground six times. The sun had set long ago, and the stars were now twinkling above us. “If he doesn’t let us in within the hour, I’m going to break in.”
“He’s sure to help us then.” I snorted and wrapped my arms around him, not giving a shit about my no touching rule right now. He was a furnace against the cold night. “Maybe if I knock, he’ll open it?”
“It can’t hurt to try at this point,” Bel growled.
I tapped my right foot softly on the ground six times.
The sidewalk directly in front of us opened up, a set of stone stairs appeared, leading underground.
I jerked away from the king, and growled, “Hurry. Before it closes.”
Vampire speed was our friend.
Just as our heads cleared the ground, it closed.
Bel led the way down the stairs at a more sedate pace now, growling every so often on a different step. “It was just a damn arm.”
My chin trembled with humor. “Don’t say that to him.”
The king huffed. “What an asshole.”
“Or that.” I cleared my throat. “How about you let me do the talking? It might help this go a lot smoother.”
With ten more stairs descended, Bel muttered, “That’s fine. Just do not let him wrangle us into smoking anything. Lord Cato was correct in that warning.”
I snickered behind him. “Any other warning I need to know?”
“His dogs,” Bel cautioned suddenly. “Do not go near them. They can run faster than a cheetah and have teeth sharper than a vampire.”
“That sounds like a party right there,” I mocked. “Tell me, when you met him, did you smoke with him and pet the pooches?”
“Not the dogs. But, yes, on the other. There are no words to explain that experience.”
“Switch places with me,” I whispered.
A door was finally in view at the bottom.
It was a little hard to maneuver around each other with our backpacks on in the cramped space, but we managed with minimal grunting and complaining on our part. I brushed my hair out of my face, straightened my back, and finished walking down the stairs with decorum.
I stopped in front of the door and knocked softly.
The door opened instantly…and smoke wafted out.
The smoke was so thick I had to hold my breath from fear of suffocating on the heady and gray cloud.
I waved a hand in front of my face to see through the haze, but it wasn’t much better. I could barely make out a druid who was at least seven feet tall and had short black hair, skin whiter than pearl and dark black eyes.
I held out my hand and dared to breathe, saying, “I’m Queen Gwynnore. Are you Lonzo?”
He shook my hand, his palm softer than silk. “I am, your majesty. I wondered when you were going to knock out there. I never would have answered for the prick behind you.”
“Yes, he can be trying at times.” I chuckled quietly. “Or most times, depending on his mood.”
He waved his right hand in a gesture for us to come in. “I’m extremely curious to know what has brought the both of you to my doorstep.”
Bel and I walked inside his home.
I kept my perusal short but invasive.
His spelled underground home was as large as a city block, the entire area open. The black stone walls moved, each stone constantly rearranging itself, like an impossible jigsaw puzzle. All the normal furniture for a bachelor pad, but with the added bonus of twenty motherfucking Chihuahuas sitting directly in the center of the room, the entire pack staring right at us.
I waited for him to close the door and ignored the fact that the door instantly disappeared and turned into a mark of the ever-changing black rock wall.
I stated seriously, “Lonzo, I would like to purchase something from you.”
His head tipped to the side, and he drawled, “Unless it’s my body for sexual pleasure, which you may have for free, your majesty, I no longer do business with Royals. One particular cunt ripped off my left arm when he felt the deal was dirty.”
“As charming as the sexual pursuit sounds—thank you for offering, by the way—I am currently taken.” I smiled with sugar and sweetness. “You’ve never worked with me before. I’m told I’m much friendlier to deal with than the others.”
That wasn’t true, actually. I’d been told many times in the past few days where I could shove “insert whatever I needed” where the sun doesn’t shine. Such a lovely term that.
That’s when I would pass them over to Lord Xenon. The man had a silver tongue when the Royals wanted something. Everyone just needed to speak with him. It pinged on the ego a bit if I was honest.
“Are you truly friendlier, your majesty?” Lonzo took a step forward into my personal space. “Do you want to be my friend?”
Warning. Warning. Warning.
“Friendly, I believe, is what I said.” My brows furrowed low. “Actually, I talk too much for some people to be their friend.”
Lonzo laughed quietly and raised his remaining arm and brushed his fingers through his hair. “I talk too little, I’m told. Maybe we’d make the perfect match to be friends.”
I lifted a black eyebrow. “Tell me what you want to make a deal. I’ll make it happen if I’m able to. And my resources are grand.”
“I’ve heard that before.” He gently took hold of my hand and tugged me with exquisite care into the space where his washing machine and dryer were. The druid released my hand and waved it at the machines. “I need my laundry done. If you can manage to wash and dry and hang up every piece of dirty clothes I have right here in six hours, I will grant you what you wish.”
I blinked at the industrial washing machine and dryer, and then the tiny basket of dirty clothes sitting next to it. My eyes lifted to his. I questioned, “What’s the catch?”
Lonzo’s grin was slick on his pearly white skin. “You and Belshazzar will smoke with me first.”
I glanced at the lingering smoke still floating inside the room. “Wouldn’t you like something different than what you’re used to?”
“You mean, like having a man I hate wash my dirty underwear?” He shook his head. “There’s nothing I want more right now. And I need to leave for a few hours, anyway, so you’d have the place all to yourself with the cunt.”
Fucking shit.
I tossed a special glance at my lover but quickly returned my attention to the druid. “I need to know that you can accomplish what we need first.”
“Name it.”
I turned my head to the vampire next to me.
Because I didn’t want to fuck up and say the wrong thing and then be stuck doing his laundry again tomorrow.
Bel stated clearly, “Queen Gwynnore and I need a permanent translation spell done on ourselves. We need to be able to speak any language, understand when it is spoken to us, and also be able to read and write it perfectly.”
Lonzo hadn’t looked away from me the entire time the king was talking. He nodded once and stuck out his hand. “I can do that. Do we have a deal?”
I stared at his lone hand.
And shook it quickly. “Deal.”
* * *
Bel and I gazed at one another.
I whispered, “Did we just smoke something?”
“I think so…” Bel wobbled on the dryer he sat on. “It smells like springtime in here. Do you smell that, Gwen? Springtime. It’s glorious.”
“Oh! Puppies!” I exclaimed and pointed from where I sat next to him on a washing machine. “They’re so pretty. I’ve never seen dogs that are purple and pink before.”
My lover inhaled deeply, and sang, “Springtime is here…”
“Wait a second,” I mumbled. I leaned forward and squinted. “Those aren’t dogs. Those are peacocks. No wonder they’re so beautiful.”
I quieted and watched the peacocks walk around, ruffling their stunning tails like they were listening to the sweetest and most loving and generous man serenading me with songs about his favorite season of the year.
I whispered, “Bel, did we smoke something?”
“I’m pretty sure we did.” He scooted on the dryer, back and forth. Back and forth. His head tipped back, and he groaned. “You’ve got to try this, Gwen. It feels so amazing.”
I closed my eyes and rubbed my ass on the washer, and then I shivered. “What is this made of?” I moaned loud, the sound of my voice amazing, warm bliss storming my lower stomach. I rubbed harder. “It feels like angels are trying to get me to come.”
“Oh, little one. I like that.”
I pushed harder on the angel’s hands. “Bel, is that you?”
“I’m here, Gwen. I’m here.”
Light jarred my eyes open, and I whispered, “I think…I think we might have smoked something.”
Bel stopped moving on the dryer, and his head fell forward. He repeatedly blinked down at his lap. “We definitely smoked something.” He rubbed at his forehead. “I’m forgetting something. It’s right there, but I can’t touch it.”
I swayed back and forth, and listened hard, “Do you hear that? It sounds like a Christmas carol.”
“I don’t hear anything, Gwen.” Bel’s hair fell down around his face as he pushed off the dryer. He wobbled on his strong legs and looked around. “What was I supposed to do?”
I hummed to the carol and moved my arms in the air, the conductor to the instruments. Damn, I was great at this. The best there ever was. The world watched, and I shined!
Bel rubbed his whiskered chin and slowly started to turn in a circle, his stunning eyes scrutinizing everything around him. He stopped when he faced me. His eyes lowered to the washer underneath me, and then slowly back up. My lover stared, so beautiful, so precious. So fucking perfect.
My favorite part was coming. I worked my arms harder into the air, each beat a precise movement. The symphony was astonishing tonight. All because of me. I was amazing.
Belshazzar covered his mouth with his hand, and asked quietly, “Gwen, what are you doing?”
My smile dazzled the stars. “I’m shining.”
He lunged forward and grabbed my wrists, holding them captive against his chest. His eyes drilled into mine. “Gwen, I need you to shine elsewhere. I need the washer.”
“Anything for you. You are so perfect.” I bent forward and touched the tip of my nose to his. “Your eyes look like you captured heaven in them.”
His lips twitched. “Thank you, little one. But I’m going to pick you up and move you to the dryer. Then we can talk all about my eyes if you want to. Okay?”
“Hold me, and everything will be okay.”
“I’ll take that as a yes.” Bel’s muscled arms wrapped around me, and like the protector he was, he lifted me and gently placed me on the dryer next to the washer. His fingers brushed my hair back from my face, and whispered, “If my eyes hold heaven in them, then yours hold the galaxies.”
My shoulders sagged in awe, and I whispered, “So perfect.”
Bel kissed the tip of my nose, then grabbed a basket of dirty laundry and started the washer. He dumped them inside, added detergent, and slammed the top shut. Then he leaned a hip against the machine and checked his cell phone. He cursed quietly. “Jesus, we were out for four hours.”
I shook my head. “We aren’t out. We’re inside.” I waved a hand at the home. “See?”
My lover snorted. “Okay, I was out for four hours. You’re still…inside.”
“Where did you go?” My eyes welled with tears, and my heart broke at the edge. “Why did you leave me?”
“Fuck.” Bel slid over and stood between my legs. He pulled me against his chest and held me close. His fingers ran through my hair, over and over, as he stated gently, “I’m not going anywhere. Not with you in my arms.”
I sighed in relief and rested my cheek against his warm shoulder. “You say the most wonderful things.”
He simply swayed where he stood and rocked me inside his hold while we listened to the washer do its job.
I blinked when it suddenly stopped and lifted my head from Bel’s shoulder. My brows puckered in confusion. “I feel…odd. What’s happened?”
“We made a deal with Lonzo.” He leaned his head back to stare down into my eyes. “May I let you go for a second? I need to put the clothes in the dryer.”
“Sure, go ahead.” I rubbed at my forehead when he released me. I looked around the home we were in; nothing looked familiar. “Where are we?”
“At Lonzo’s home. We have to finish this laundry in the next hour to get the translation spell.”
My brows puckered as memories slowly came back. I hopped off the dryer so Bel could work. “We smoked, didn’t we?”
Very peculiar thoughts of the last few hours were floating around in my head, none of them making much sense.
“Yes, we did.” Done loading the dryer, he closed it and started it. “At least he gave us the pleasant shit. The crap I smoked with him the first time had a different outcome.”
My head tilted. “That’s how he lost his arm.”
“Yes. I think he went easy on us because he likes you. You made a good deal with him and handled the transaction well.”
I bowed my head to him. “Thank you.”
We turned then and stared at the dryer.
And we waited.
As soon as it stopped, two minutes before Lonzo was supposed to arrive, we sped into motion using our vampire speed. And when he came through his door thirty seconds early, Bel and I were sitting back on the washer and dryer perfectly at ease—at least, to him we were.
My lover and I waited in silence. We had held up our end of the deal. It was time for him to do his part.
Lonzo smirked. “Enjoy the ride?”
Neither of us said a word.
“It was fun. I know it was. You don’t have to say anything. I know.”
Bel growled, “Lonzo, we are on a tight deadline. Please hurry up. I am asking nicely.”
“Yes, I suppose you are.” He strolled forward and stopped between the two of us. He touched each of our foreheads and whispered a single indecipherable word. The man was truly talented, the spell done without much thought. He grinned. “That’s it, folks. You can leave now.”
We grabbed our backpacks and fucking left.
I hoped I never had to make a deal with that druid again. Not on a time crunch, anyway.
“Where are we going now?” I asked.
Bel dodged a human not watching where they were going, swerving around him with ease. He set the pace at a fast clip, making me jog to keep up with him. “We’re going to Hilton Head in South Carolina. My yacht is there. It shouldn’t take long once we’re on the water. If my memory is correct, I traveled maybe an hour from S’Kir in a small boat before I hit land. The Island of the Unseen Gods may be hidden from this world, but it isn’t inconvenient to those who go to and from Earth to it.”
I nodded. “So we get there and…do what?”
“We walk through the Gate.”
“The Gate?”
“Yes, the entrance to S’Kir.”
“Sounds easy enough.” Once we hit the grass and the forest was before us, we started sprinting. “In a hurry?”
“Yes,” he muttered emphatically.
I surveyed his profile while we ran. “You’re excited.”
“You have no idea.” He shook his head. “It has been…so long, Gwen. So damn long.”
We stopped when we were far enough away; no heartbeats were near us. I placed my hand on his shoulder, and stated, “Take me to your boat. I’m ready to set sail.”
“Yacht,” he clarified absently while he pulled the Original vampire amulet from his pocket. “My baby is not a boat. It is a yacht.”
Someone was proud. “Yacht.”
“Correct.” Bel used the same precision he had used the first time to create this portal, nodding approvingly at his work. “Don’t let go.”
“I won’t.”
We stepped through the portal with excitement running through our veins. It was almost time.