Roman
“I’m still breathing. I didn’t do anything drastic to him. I’m still employed. I ate my vegetables. Anything else you called to be nosy about?” I loved my cousin, but he was starting to drive me to the brink of insanity.
The hovering was getting ridiculous.
He laughed. “I’m glad. I feel like I should say good boy, but I think you’d get offended by that.”
“On so many levels; you have no idea.” Unfortunately, he probably did.
Taking the last sip of my coffee, I got up from my tiny kitchen table. The apartment had come fully furnished, so it was all tacky and mismatched, but I hadn’t needed to shell out any extra money. Eventually, I’d get a real place again.
“I just called so I can tell the gaggle that I’ve talked to you recently, and that you seem like you’re doing fine.” Devin tried to sound casual, but I could hear something else in his voice.
Rinsing out my cup, I answered automatically. “I’m fine.”
He coughed. “Um, you sound less like an asshole—but not much. Have you done anything fun lately?” Then he continued like he’d just realized what I’d said. “And I think the job is going better than fine. I saw the pictures on the website that you did. They look great.”
“Why are you browsing around it? Something you want to tell me?” With my asshole ex blasting my personal life to the world, my family hadn’t been spared any of the details, so I wasn’t that concerned with their privacy anymore.
Devin laughed. “Nothing for me. I know someone who needed to see that he’s not the most colorful crayon in the box, so I pulled up the site. The photos you took of Eli showed up first, and they were great. I think some of the best I’ve seen from you.” Then his laughter turned into more of a snicker. “And that includes those kinky ones that my mother called up hollering about.”
“Thanks.” I hated to even admit to myself that he was right. So I stayed silent on the rest.
I’d done several shoots since I’d been hired, and they’d all gone well. But the photos with Eli were always the best. Even when he drove me insane, and I wanted to shove his flirty, smart-ass remarks up his—
I was starting to see the reason his previous photographer had spanked him.
Not that I was willing to indulge the brat.
“So, no comments about how they’re not that good, or that he’s terrible to work with?” Devin’s laughter was beginning to get annoying.
Setting my cup by the edge of the sink, I headed to the bedroom. The living room was almost empty, the only thing in it a lone couch that was so uncomfortable I never used it. After only living in the place twenty-four hours, I’d moved the TV back into the bedroom and basically lived out of there. The bed wasn’t much more comfortable, but at least I could stretch out.
“I’m professional.” Sometimes.
As long as I’d had a reasonable break from Eli.
“Bullshit.” Devin finally got his laughter under control. “The last time I called, you were threatening to murder him.”
That had been the shoot the photos he loved were from.
It’d been…difficult. “I’ve calmed down.”
And the fact that I hadn’t worked with him in a week might have been part of the reason. Eli made me want to pull my hair out. The only time I’d gotten a break from him was when he’d gone out of town for a few days.
Otherwise, no matter who I was shooting, he was always right there. Unfortunately, he was back, and one of the companies they worked with had sent some samples of a new line they were thinking about producing. So my sanity was going to be tested again that afternoon.
“Haven’t been to work lately?” Devin guessed, teasingly.
“I was on a shoot just yesterday. It went very smoothly.”
Devin tried to contain his smirk, but it didn’t work. “Then it wasn’t with Eli.”
“How do you know them so well?”
I could almost hear the shrug in Devin’s voice. “I told you, they do stuff for the center sometimes. They stand out. Especially Eli.”
Devin had sent me the notice about the photography job that’d opened up. It had landed on my desk at the perfect time. I’d been packed up and had sold nearly everything I owned to afford the move, and I’d just needed to figure out where to go.
With Devin offering the use of his couch and the potential for a job, it had seemed like a good fit. I was starting to wish I’d thought things through a bit more. But with the rent on my old place coming due and no way to pay it, there hadn’t been much of a choice.
Browsing through the small closet, I started picking out something to wear. At home all morning working on ways to restart my business, I hadn’t bothered with getting ready, but now that I was on the countdown to deal with Eli, it couldn’t be put off any longer.
“How’s the center doing?” Asking Devin about his work was the only guaranteed way of getting him off my back.
Devin ran an LGBT youth center that focused on helping kids in transition. They did a little bit of everything, but it was his passion and took up most of his time, much to his mother’s frustration. “Mom called and wanted to know why you haven’t found a nice guy yet.”
Devin moaned. “Don’t get me started on that gaggle.”
He’d started calling my mother and her sisters “a gaggle of nosy geese” when he was in high school. It was a good fit for them. Devin and I had about the same level of patience for it, which was how he’d ended up so far from the rest of them. It was working out in my favor.
“The center is going great, but I refuse to give them any more gossip. You wouldn’t believe the shit I had to hear about Aunt Deedee’s oldest. Somebody needs to call her and warn her. She’s going to hit the roof when she finds out what her mother is saying.” I could almost hear Devin rolling his eyes.
“I’m not getting involved. I’m finally off the hot seat, so I have no desire to rock the boat.” My phone had rung off the hook for weeks after all the drama had finally exploded. From my mother worrying about “where she’d gone wrong” to her sisters calling for good bits of gossip under the guise of helping, I’d had about all the family bonding I could handle for a while.
Devin laughed. “They’ll come back to you eventually. You have a job now, but once they find out you’re not working for a clothing company, they’re going to lose their shit.”
“I am working for a clothing company.” Fuck, that was all I needed. “You tell any of them, and I’ll tell your mother you want kids.” Tossing some clothes on the bed, I started gathering up everything else I wanted to bring with me.
He sucked in a breath. “That’s low.”
“Two words…biological clock.” They’d be so focused on him, I’d never hear from any of them. “I’ll tell them you were drunk and crying that you didn’t have a family and kids. You were so upset about not being married that you were hiding it from everyone.”
“Ass.” Then Devin chuckled. “We’ve still got Stevie to throw under the bus. His mother still doesn’t know about the tattoo or those two girls he’s living with.”
“Yeah, we’ll keep him in reserve. But I’m surprised nobody else has used him yet. We wait too long, and all the good shit’s going to be out in the open.” Blackmail material was the only reason to have a big family, as far as I was concerned.
Devin scoffed. “In this family? Not a chance.” I heard what sounded like a car door slamming. “I’m late for a meeting, so I’ve gotta hang up. But when my mother asks if you’re fine, will I be lying if I tell her you’re good?”
Probably.
“No, everything’s starting to work out.” As long as I left out work, my personal life, my finances, and my sanity.
“Alright. Just let me know if you need anything.” He wasn’t going to argue, but it was clear he didn’t believe me.
“You already did more than enough.” Letting me stay on his couch long enough to get my first check, and even putting up with my grumpy ass, was more than I could have asked for.
Not telling my mother how bad things got was enough that I was going to owe him, eventually.
“Just let me know. You can always work with my monsters if you want.”
“No chance in hell.” He laughed at how serious I was. “Helping out sometimes is fine. That’s it, though.”
“I’m hurt.” The laughter made that statement unbelievable.
“Would you want me there all day?”
“Enough said.” The smile in his voice made me almost angry. But his next words pushed me well into insane. “I wasn’t going to say anything, but I think you deserve to know.”
Shit.
“What?”
“He called me.”
There were only two men I referred to as “he.” But in this situation, there was no other “he” it could be. My ex. “Why?”
“I got some line of crap that he missed you and realized how badly he’d treated you.” Devin’s voice said he thought it was a load of shit.
I tried to mentally shrug it off. “I guess all the money is gone.”
Devin didn’t respond to that; he just kept going. “I told him where he could shove his apology and said you weren’t interested. That was what you wanted me to say, right? You didn’t want him back or anything, did you?”
“Hell, no. I’m not that stupid.” I almost smiled at his sigh of relief. “He fucked my entire life up for ten seconds of internet fame.”
Devin just started grumbling, no longer nervous that I’d lose it. “He called the other night around three in the morning or something crazy like that. He’d been drinking and rambled on about how sorry he was.”
“Bullshit. If he’d been that upset it wouldn’t have taken him months and all my money to realize it.” I hadn’t been rich, but I’d been comfortable, with everything in my life planned out.
“Good. I was worried once I woke up completely and realized how fucked up it was that he’d even called.”
“How did he even know to call you?”
“I don’t know, but you might want to be careful with what kind of stuff you put online. Your name and even the business stuff for a while.”
Great. “I can’t stop my life. If he calls, I’ll deal with it. Hopefully, he’s smart enough to know that tracking me would be a bad idea.” In this day and age, no website meant no business, especially for a job like mine.
Devin snorted. “Yeah, understatement of the year. Okay, really got to go this time. Talk to you later.”
Tossing my phone down on the bed, I started stripping off the sweatpants I’d been lounging in and began getting ready. It felt more like I was putting on armor and less like jeans and a nice button-down. But with Eli around, it always felt like I needed one more layer to keep him away.
Not that he’d ever done anything overtly sexual to me specifically. While he hung on the rest of the guys and flirted, no matter what he was wearing, with me he kept his distance physically. I still had to watch everything else he was doing, but it was nothing I could complain about.
Preston, I need you to make Eli stop flirting. Yeah, that would go over well. And it wasn’t like I hadn’t realized how they dealt with each other or the total lack of inhibition, so I couldn’t really complain. It was maddening.
He was unprofessional.
He was annoying.
He thought he knew better about everything.
He had opinions on everything.
He wouldn’t shut up.
He was constantly turned on and loved to rub it in my face—well, not exactly rub. But the constant arousal and general level of desire coming from him was frustrating. How was I supposed to concentrate with his dick waving everywhere?
A certain level of professionalism should be expected in a workplace.
It didn’t matter what the hell they sold. None of the other guys I’d photographed had given me the same level of insanity. Some were more cautious than others and some seemed to have settled on Eli’s side things, but they’d all done their best to make the shoots go smoothly.
By the time I was ready to go, even I could feel my stress level rising. Heading out the door, I tried to take a deep breath, but all I could focus on was the impending drama. Even I had to admit the photos would turn out incredible, no matter what he was wearing, but I wasn’t sure if it was worth it.
The constant temptation and failure that the brat represented was too much.
****
“I’m not doing this with you today. Just take the goddamned picture like I tell you to so we can get this done. Some of us have better things to do than argue with your sorry ass all day!” Eli’s anger would have touched me more if he hadn’t been hard and naked.
Nearly naked.
Somehow the panties, stretched out with his erection straining the fabric, made it harder to take him seriously.
That was the only reason I could think of why the crazy shit popped out of my mouth. That, and he made me want to shout at him to put some fucking clothes on. “I’m sorry if you have a street corner to go prowl, but some of us have actual work. If you could get your dick under control and look more like a professional model and less like a hooker, we could’ve been done with this an hour ago!”
Eli’s heaving chest, flushed with frustration and anger, should have made the lingerie look even more absurd; instead, somehow the contrast made me want to stare at him. Continuing to take pictures, because that’s what I was there for, I couldn’t help trying to capture the unique look.
All while silently damning the man for looking so hot.
Why couldn’t brats be ugly? Hell, I’d even take plain. No, brats always had to have a fire inside them that pulled people in. Eli didn’t see the comparison as well as I did because he just started screeching at me again, stalking toward me with those long stocking-clad legs and the high heels making sharp sounds on the wood floor.
“We’ll be done with this when I say we are. It’s my blog, remember, asshole? My readers want to see the things I liked from the new line, and that’s what I’m going to show them.” He reached down and traced his fingers over his erection. “And I’m not going to hide what I like.”
The implied “unlike some people” was clear in his voice.
“Hiding and being a goddamned professional are two different things.” The camera was going crazy as I tried to capture every movement and flash of anger. I wasn’t hiding a damn thing. Just because I wouldn’t give in didn’t mean I was denying anything.
It really was too bad he wouldn’t let his face be on the site. He was an ass, but I knew the full pictures would be even better.
“Not in this business, baby. When there’s nothing to hide behind, you have to be honest with people!” He stalked across the set, glancing around for something to throw at me, more than likely. “Unlike some people with a stick up their ass who can’t manage to do their fucking job!”
“Well, I’ve done my fucking job for today! You have enough slutty pictures to post all over the internet if you want. This was supposed to have been a short shoot to see how the new clothes looked, not an excuse for you to prance around naked all day!” Storming over to the table where all my stuff was laid out, I set my camera down, trying to ignore the flood of emotion running through me.
“I don’t need an excuse around here to do that! It’s a goddamned fetish and lingerie company, moron!” Eli’s anger echoed throughout the room, making our audience pull in a breath.
They weren’t helping the situation.
I wasn’t sure if it was a quirk of the company, or just my luck, but everyone in the building would walk through the room at least once during a photo shoot. There was no concept of privacy or modesty. They changed clothes in front of one another, and Eli would run up to almost all of them stark naked and give them a hug.
It was enough to make anyone insane.
Packing everything up, I turned to give him another piece of my mind but stopped as Preston entered the studio. He came in once in a while, usually right before a shoot to point out something or give me a direction he was thinking about for the photos, but usually, he left the studio portion of the building alone.
“Eli, when you have a moment I need to see you.” Preston gave Eli a long look but didn’t say anything more before he started heading over for me.
Gripping my bags tighter, I tried not to look as nervous as I felt. I needed the job, and even if Eli made me crazy, I needed to learn to keep more of it inside, or I was going to end up fired. I thought he’d say something about the argument, but he either ignored it or hadn’t heard it. No matter the reason, I was relieved.
“I’d like to see how these turn out as soon as you get some of the edits done. The company is breathing down my neck, and I want to be able to give them an answer soon. I like the quality that they’ve sent, but I need to know how it shows up on camera.” Preston’s even tone made it hard to stay angry.
“I think they’ll look good. I’m not sure about selfies with a few of the fabrics, but with the right lighting, the colors are going to pop.” I wasn’t sure how well they’d sell or even if the shades they came in were something people would buy, but the photos were going to be amazing.
“Great. I’m going to talk to Eli about the actual pieces, but once you have some of the photos done, if you could send them to me and to Eli I’d appreciate it.” Preston nodded and started to head toward the door, his business casual look at odds with the eclectic looks the models and staff were wearing.
In any other office, I would have expected some kind of comment about getting back to their jobs or wasting time, but Preston smiled and shook his head. He said something quietly to several models that were heading out the door with him, but they just nodded and gave him beaming smiles, so it couldn’t have been anything about work.
As I turned to go, I caught Eli out of the corner of my eye as he started to strip off the clothing. Watching him peel down the thigh-high hose wasn’t something I was willing to do, so I started walking away. Brats were my drug of choice, but I knew how bad they were for me, and I wasn’t willing to crash again. I was in recovery and I was going to stay that way.
No matter what it took.