ELI
“You really need to eat, Eli,” I heard my mother’s voice say in a gentle tone.
My vision was blurred from lack of sleep, but I wasn’t hungry at all.
The last two and a half days had been like a nightmare that I’d experienced while I was completely awake. And I still didn’t feel like I’d been able to step out of my bad dream.
If I lived to be a century old, I knew I’d never forget the sight of Jade lying broken and bleeding at the bottom of the rappel cliff.
I was guessing my fear over the bear had just been a prelude to what was about to come.
And I thought we were doing something relatively safe.
We’d gotten Jade to a small local hospital after her fall, and they’d almost immediately transferred her by air to Billings, where she’d been stabilized. They’d fixed her dislocated shoulder, popping it back into place without major surgery, and she was going to recover from her skull fracture.
Her physician had allowed her to be transferred back to San Diego by air earlier in the day, but she was still in intensive care.
She had woken up several times, but was allowed to sleep again as soon as the medical staff determined that she was as oriented as she could be with pain medication on board.
“Thanks, Mom, but I’m not hungry,” I muttered, keeping Jade’s smaller hand clutched in mine.
I felt a hand clap on my shoulder. “Dude, you need to take a break. We’re all here now. We got this. Go eat and get some sleep.”
I looked up to match the voice with the face. For the most part, Jade’s brothers all sounded alike.
It was Noah, and he had a determined look on his face.
“I’m good,” I protested.
“She’s not going to die while you go take care of yourself,” he rumbled. “And you’re not doing her any good by getting this sleep deprived.”
“I’ll sit by her side while you’re gone,” a soft, feminine voice said from my other side.
I glanced up at Jade’s twin, Brooke, as she nudged me to move off the chair.
Standing up reluctantly, I watched as Jade’s sister took my place. “Go,” she instructed. “Jade wouldn’t want you to wear yourself out like this, Eli. You were with her for over two days when she needed you. Let us help now.”
There were several bodies present around the room. Since Jade wasn’t considered critical, they allowed all of us to hang out in the private room.
Everyone there was related to Jade, except for Brooke’s husband, my mother, and me.
My mother had shown up after I talked to her on the phone to explain that I wasn’t going to be able to host the fund-raiser that I’d promised for Jade’s charity. Mom had taken over and postponed the event, calling every attendee and vendor to reschedule with the help of my assistants.
“I’ll be back,” I said firmly.
“Is that a threat or a promise?” Aiden said jokingly. “She’ll be fine, Eli. My brothers and I have taken care of her most of her life. It’s not like we haven’t seen her sick or banged up before.”
Maybe they had seen her hurt, but I hadn’t, and her condition had kept me glued to her hospital bed nonstop for a few days.
I’d been there with her in Billings when she was making anguished cries of pain while they were putting her shoulder back in place.
Jesus Christ! If I never heard her hurting and in pain again, it would be too soon. Her agony had ripped my heart out, leaving a clawed wound in my chest that I wasn’t sure would ever heal.
“Call me if she wants anything,” I conceded as I stepped up close to my mother.
“I think she’s pretty much out cold for now,” Seth commented. “It’s probably better that way. It will give her body a chance to heal.”
My eyes flew back to Jade, examining every scrape, laceration, and bruise on her visible skin.
“We got lucky,” I grumbled.
She’d landed on her left side, dislocating her shoulder and glancing her head off a nearby rock. But her initial body landing had broken her fall, and her head didn’t take a direct hit. If things had happened even slightly different, she could have had a much worse head injury.
“We all know it could have been even more serious,” Noah said somberly. “But it’s best not to dwell on that. If you do, it drives you crazy. Take it from me . . . I’ve been in the hospital with all of my younger siblings more times than I can count. Every one of those incidents scared the shit out of me. But they all got through it.”
Even though I knew that Noah was just a few years older than I was, his presence seemed to be a stabilizing factor for everybody.
When Brooke had arrived from the East Coast in hysterics, Noah had calmed her down with his steady demeanor.
He’d talked to all of Jade’s half-siblings and cousins on the phone, using the same even, stable tone and logical thinking to convince them that Jade was okay, and that they didn’t need to come to California to be with her.
Owen was also reassured that he didn’t need to interrupt his busy residency schedule to make his way back to California, since Jade was stable.
It was like Noah just knew how to calm everybody at the same time, probably a skill he’d acquired while he was caring for his younger siblings.
He must have felt like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders.
“I had your assistant bring dinner for everybody,” my mom said as she put her hand on my arm. “Let’s go eat.”
“If you don’t go, I’m going to go back to the dining room and inhale your food,” Seth joked. “It was really good.”
Everybody else murmured their agreement. Apparently, the only one who hadn’t eaten was me.
I quietly followed my mother out of the room, to an empty dining area right outside the room that the staff had set up for the family.
Since it wasn’t common procedure to accommodate visitors this way in the ICU, I was pretty sure that my mother had insisted since she and I were both very large donors to the research facilities.
“Sit down before you fall down,” my mother ordered.
I complied, since I’d heard that tone of voice my whole life, and I knew better than to argue with it.
“I’m fine,” I lied. “I’m just tired.”
My mother fussed with making me a plate, slapping it down in front of me within a few minutes. “Don’t lie to me, Elias,” she warned. “I always know when you aren’t telling me the truth.”
Jesus! I fucking hated it when she used my full name. She was the only woman who could make me feel like a contrite kid when I was a well-respected, and sometimes feared, billionaire businessman.
Rarely did my mother fuss over me anymore, nor did she use a tone of voice that demanded my attention.
Truth was, I could tell she was worried.
I forked a piece of the lasagna on my plate, and forced myself to chew and swallow it. I kept eating, and before I knew it, I’d cleaned the entire plate. Maybe I was hungry, but I hadn’t really stopped to think about it.
I lifted my brow as I looked at her. She’d gotten both of us coffee, and had taken a seat across from me while I scarfed down a whole plate of Italian food. “Happy now?” I asked.
She shook her head. “No. You look like hell, Eli. But I’m glad you got some food in your belly.”
I gave her a small, involuntary smile. My mother, Elizabeth Stone, was a force to be reckoned with in business. Although she’d slowed down after my father had passed away, doing more philanthropic work now, she’d worked side by side with my dad for decades. She was frighteningly intelligent and intuitive, plus she was well educated. My father had always seen her as one of his greatest assets, both in and out of business.
She’d definitely cut the umbilical cord a long time ago, but we were still close. With my dad gone now, Mom was all I had.
“It’s not exactly been an easy couple of days, Mom.”
“I expect it wasn’t,” she agreed. “I’m so sorry this happened, Eli. But I’m relieved that Jade is going to be okay.”
My parent had listened to me talk about Jade, but I was grown, so I didn’t talk much about my emotions with her anymore. “It was my fault,” I confessed.
“It was an accident,” she corrected.
“A fall that I caused,” I rasped. “I saw her too close to the edge, and I yelled at her. I startled her, and she fell.”
“You are not going to blame yourself for this,” she insisted. “Accidents happen. You acted out of fear. And you had no intention of making her fall.”
“It was stupid,” I growled. “I don’t act with my emotions. Ever.”
I calculated almost everything, thought it through before I reacted. But Jade had turned my usually logical brain upside down.
“You’re not a robot, son,” she pointed out. “Somewhere along the way, you’re going to have emotional reactions, no matter how much you try to avoid them.”
“I don’t want to feel this way,” I said in a desperate voice.
“You care about her,” she deduced. “I’m glad.”
“I’m not. And I think I care too damn much.”
My mom smiled. “Does she know that?”
“Hell, no.”
“Maybe you should tell her.”
“It wasn’t part of the deal. And I’ve pretty much been a dick to her. She’d probably run the other direction if I told her I was having a change of heart about the no commitment thing.”
“So you’re going to do the running instead,” she predicted. “Because she scares you.”
I ran a frustrated hand through my hair. “Right now, I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing, and I hate that.”
My mom reached out and grabbed my hand. “Don’t let the past mess up your future, Eli. It’s been years. It’s time to let it go. You should sell her the land.”
“I can’t,” I croaked out. “You know I can’t.”
She shook her head. “I’ve watched you torture yourself for years. For entirely no reason. It has to stop.”
It was a subject I absolutely didn’t talk about, and today was no exception. “I want to focus on Jade right now,” I told her.
“You’re as stubborn as your father was,” she lamented.
I crossed my arms. “Are you going to try to convince me that my orneriness only comes from him?”
“You think it comes from me?” she gasped, putting her hand to her chest with mock distress. “Not possible. I’m as sweet as a Georgia peach,” she drawled, laying on her Southern accent.
I let out a reluctant grunt of laughter. My mother could be sweet, but she was by no means a Southern belle. She’d been out of the South for decades, and she’d learned to bite when necessary. Luckily, she had a kind heart.
“I’m sorry I’m being a jerk,” I said, feeling bad because my mother had taken care of everything for me, and as always, she’d jumped into the fire with both feet.
I hadn’t even noticed that she’d been trying to make things easier for all of Jade’s family. Maybe it was because it was what my mom always did.
“It’s just been a really tough few days,” I added.
“You don’t need to apologize. You’re my son, Eli. I know you love me. But when you hurt, I hurt. All I ever want is to see you happy.”
I saw the tears glistening in her eyes, and it jolted me into reality. “I know. Thanks for coming. But you need to go home and get some sleep. Is Jeff here to drive you home?”
She nodded.
“Good. Did you eat?”
“I did,” she confirmed. “I had a lovely talk with Brooke while we were having dinner. If Jade is anything like her sister, she’s a lovely girl. The Sinclairs are an amazing family. Their rags-to-riches story is pretty remarkable. But it hurts my heart to know how much they struggled. It must have been hard for Noah.”
“I think it was difficult for all three of Jade’s older brothers. But they’re all pretty tough.”
“You need a girl like her,” my mother mused.
“Enough,” I said gently. “Leave my love life to me.”
She rose from the table. “If I left everything to you, I’d never live to see a grandchild,” she said huffily.
“No guilt trips,” I said. “You’re not exactly elderly and on your deathbed.”
My mother was still beautiful, and just as active as she’d always been. She could work circles around women who were decades younger.
I stood up, snagged her lightweight jacket, and held it out for her.
When she turned around, she gave me a worried look. “Please get some rest. I know you’re not going to leave, but try to sleep.”
I was my mother’s son, and she knew it. When my father had been critically ill before he’d died, my mother had never left his side.
She continued, “I left you a bag of clothes in the closet.” She pointed at the small wardrobe in the room. “There’s a physician’s shower around the corner. I’ll be back tomorrow.”
I nodded. Honestly, I was grateful for clean clothing. I was pretty sure I stank.
I hugged her tight for a moment and then watched her walk out the door.
I gathered up the clean clothes and went to find the shower.
My mother was right. I wasn’t going anywhere. But for the sake of all Jade’s family, I knew I needed to clean up.
I was back in her room ten minutes later, determined to camp out there until I was finally convinced that Jade was going to be okay.