When we got home, James followed us into the house, but he only repeated what he’d said at the station: Don’t say anything. That was the bottom line, and judging from the exhaustion and pain on Mason, Logan, and Nate’s faces, no one was going to argue with him.
Matteo had been sitting in the living room when we all went inside, but he waited until James left before standing up.
“Uh.” He folded his arms over his chest, his biceps and chest muscles bulging a little. Glancing around, he seemed unsure. “Do you guys need anything?” He turned to me. “Bandages? Antibiotic cream? Are you stocked with all that stuff?”
Mason’s hand came to rest on the small of my back. “I think we’re good on everything. Thanks, though, Teo.”
He nodded. “Yeah. Just let me know. If you need me to run and grab something, I can do that, too.”
I fought against leaning back into Mason’s hand. I wanted to. I wanted to sink into his warmth and reassure myself he was okay. I didn’t. I didn’t know the extent of his injuries, and I was grateful when Nate and Logan murmured they were going to bed.
Logan paused on his way to his bedroom. “I’m going to call Taylor.”
I rested a hand on his arm. “That’s a good idea.” She left a week earlier to spend some time with her dad and her friends. “She’ll want to know you’re okay.”
“Yeah.” He sighed.
Matteo lingered as everyone dispersed. Even Mason went to our room, but I held back.
Matteo’s shoulders fell. “I don’t know what to do.”
He looked lost, like a three year old whose mother was out of sight.
I knew that look. I’d seen it on others who’d thought they were in the circle and then realized they weren’t.
I patted his shoulder. “Just be a good friend. That’s it.”
“I didn’t—I know the three of them are tight, but I could’ve helped. They didn’t even give me the option, you know?”
“You’re a good guy. That’s how Mason views you. He doesn’t want to make you not good.”
“That’s what he thinks? Because it feels a whole lot like I’m not good enough.”
I shook my head. “No. That’s not it at all. Mason wouldn’t let you stay here. He wouldn’t have even called you if he thought that. He doesn’t want to put you in a position where your future could be affected.”
He nodded, his head hanging. “I get it, but I wouldn’t mind. I know I joke that Logan’s my soul brotha connection, but Mason’s the brother to me, too. I love the guy.”
“I know. He feels the same.”
“Just let him know that if he needs anything—and I mean it, anything—I’m here for him. There’s not a lot I wouldn’t do for you guys.”
“He knows.”
He nodded again, and I left him there, looking defeated.
I found Mason in the bathroom, stripped to the waist as he stared in the mirror. I had to stop in the doorway once I got a good look at him. Reaching for the doorframe, I steadied myself.
His entire chest and stomach were covered in bruises. There were cuts and gashes all over. Blood had seeped through some of the bandages the hospital put on him, and I couldn’t hold back a small whimper.
“I did worse than this.”
I took his hand. “I know.”
He was trying to reassure me, but as I led him into the shower, I knew what I could see wasn’t the real damage. I put the showerhead on a softer setting so the water wouldn’t pound down on him, and as he stood in the middle of the shower, I began removing his dressings. Once he was naked in front of me, I couldn’t help myself. Softly, I ran my hands over every inch of him and kissed all of his cuts, everywhere he’d been hit or where his skin was torn. I wanted him to know I loved every inch of him, and when I was done, I looked up.
His gaze was dark, but there was pain in his eyes.
He was hurting. I touched the side of his face and whispered, “What you did was to protect us. You protected Logan. You protected Nate. You protected yourself, and you were protecting me, too.” He leaned down enough that I could rest my forehead against his. “If anything had happened to you. Anything…” I closed my eyes, drawing in a shuddering breath.
I couldn’t even—
I couldn’t think about that.
My God.
I opened my eyes and stared right into his. “If anything had happened to you, you know how devastated I would be. You were protecting me, too.”
“I could’ve killed someone.”
He might have.
I shook my head. “You didn’t, and you won’t. Those guys will wake up. You were only protecting us. That’s it.”
“Sam.” His chest rose as he drew in a ragged breath. His forehead rested a little bit heavier on me. “If you’d been there…”
A lump formed in the back of my throat.
I swallowed it. He couldn’t think like that, and neither could I.
My hand trailed down his arm until it found his fingers, and I laced our hands together. “Everything will be fine. Everything will be fine.”
I was lying to him. Everything might not be fine, but I had to believe it, and I had to make him believe it. There would be other enemies. There would be other times when Mason might have to fight, but he’d risen above the odds. There were so many against him and Nate, and Logan. Too many.
I moved closer, folding my body gently to his. As his arms wrapped around me, I found myself saying, “They might’ve killed you.” My lips touched his chest. The water came down over both of us, and some of it hit my lips. I barely noticed. “The cop said sixteen guys came to attack you three. Sixteen to three. You defended yourself. That’s all you did.” I pulled back to hold his gaze again. I felt him searching. He needed to believe what I was saying. “Sixteen to three, Mason. No judge will convict you on those odds.”
He nodded, closing his eyes.
“Everything will be fine.”
Maybe I was lying to myself now.