While Estelle spoke to her mother in Canada, and the others sat to discuss my demise, I excused myself and climbed the stairs. My body was shaking again, and this time I refused to go into shock.

Nope. Not gonna happen.

These people were trying to break me and I will show them I am stronger then they believed. I refused to crack a second time during this mess. I’d rather burn their pathetic lives to the ground then dance around the fucking flames. This was too much and as my nerves turned to fear and fear to raw, pulsing rage, my body shook for an entirely different reason other than shock. I closed the bathroom door, braced my hand on the sink and stared into my reflections eyes.

“Let them come.” I muttered. “Enough is fucking enough.”

But even with my pep-talk to myself, I still couldn’t stop the fury surging through me or my hands from shaking. I turned on the tap, ensured the water was running to the right temperature for my body, then reached for a bottle of shampoo. It slipped from my fingers and landed, loudly, in the tub.

“For fuck’s sakes.”

My frustration heightened when I tried reaching back to undo the zipper for my top. I thought it was the sexiest blouse a woman could wear since it hugged the body and the zipper sat just right all the way up to the back of my neck where my hair started. But in that moment I wanted to hurl it out a window.

“Nova?” Reaper’s voice was soft from the other side of the door followed by a knock. “Nova, are you okay?”

“No.” My honesty left my lips before I could stop it. “I’m not okay.”

Why stop now?

“Can I come in?”

Why the hell not? I was still fully dressed even though the water had been running a while. I sighed. “Sure.”

The door opened slowly and Reaper stuck his head in. I guess that was his way of making sure I wasn’t buck-naked. He then drew the rest of his massive frame into the room and closed the door behind him.

“Did you fall?” He asked.

I shook my head then reached into the tub to grab the wet bottle. “I knocked this over. I’m trembling.”

He instantly came closer, held my shoulder in one palm and drew up one of my eye lids followed by the next to look in. I knew what he was searching for—any signs I was going to lose it again. It had been a while since anyone showed that intimate of a concern for me, so I allowed it. He backed away when he was satisfied I wasn’t about to keel over.

“Talk to me.”

“Where do I even start?” I muttered. “All I want to do was steal a little time for myself. Everything has turned to such shit, all I needed was just one second to breathe.”

“Okay.”

“I wanted to wash my hair and shave my legs because even if the world is crumbling around me, I didn’t want to have sasquatch legs!”

Reaper laughed softly. It was the first time I’d heard that sound from him. For a moment, I just stared at him, watching the way his cheeks tugged up at the corners, loving his perfectly lined and very white teeth—I love the way the corners of his eyes crinkled in his mirth. How could this man get any sexier?

Was that even possible?

I blew out a puff of air and reached for my toiletries bag. Molly had hooked a girl up and I couldn’t even use any of what was in it. If I tried shaving anything, I’d nick myself so many times I was liable to bleed to death.

“Here.” Reaper took the bag from my hands. He set it back on the small vanity and turned his back. “Get undressed and wrap in a towel.”

“Um…”

“Come on, Sasquatch legs. I don’t have all night.”

“Ass.” I muttered, irritably. Still, I tried doing as he suggested. “Could you help me with this zipper?”

I turned my back and waited. Soon, Reaper gathered my long ponytail in one hand and gently eased it over my shoulder. I wished he would kiss the bare flesh that action exposed. But he didn’t. instead, he tugged the zipper down—slowly—until the air in the bathroom brushed against my skin.

Touch me.

Just once. Trail your fingertips down my spine. Please?

But, I kept wants to myself and was happy when he turned away from me again, so I could get undressed. I took a few extra seconds to make sure I wouldn’t have some random towel wardrobe malfunction then held my breath. “I’m done.”

He turned slightly, looked at me then shifted on his heels to face me completely. “Good.” He sat on the rim of the bathtub and grabbed my bag. “Close the toilet and sit on the seat.”

As I did as he asked he pulled out the small canister of shaving cream, then the razer. “I didn’t think women still shaved,” he said, uncapping both and squirting some cream into his hands. “I thought all of you were using these hair remover things.”

“I don’t know, Reaper.” I watched him intently. “A cream to make your hair fall off? I don’t know how that’s healthy for anyone’s body.”

He chuckled. “Okay, lift your leg to my thigh.”

“Um…”

“Star?”

I sighed and did as he asked, pressing a hand on the towel between my legs to keep myself modest.

Reaper lathered my leg with the shaving cream, his large hands moving over my skin slowly. He then rinsed his hand in the tub, wet the razer and began passing it carefully over my skin. To my surprise, he shaved against the grain, ensuring to get each line of cream as he went. Periodically, he’d rinse the razer in the running water before returning to his job.

When he began my next leg, I was surprised, not one nick.

“Where did you learn to do this?”

“I shave my face regularly,” he said. “I figured it would be almost the same thing. Hold still. I don’t want to cut you.”

There was no way to hide the smile that swarmed my face. He’d been taking so much care with what he was doing. My heart melted then and the rage that had caused him to enter in the first place vanished. Still, I allowed him to continue.

In the silence of the room, I couldn’t help wondering if he’d done this for the other women he’d been with. With the same mind, I grew jealous of those others. They’d seen him—all of him—felt him and knew what he was capable of in their beds. I was a mere job.

He tapped my thigh gently to gain my attention and I managed a smile. He was finished with my legs. But Reaper didn’t stop there. He removed his shirt and climbed into the tub with me. Maverick Forge’s body was as perfect as I’d imagined. His chest and abs were hard and perfectly sculpted.

“Star?”

“Sorry. I don’t really trust my legs right now.” I lied. “My knees are a little weak.”

“Do you want to lay down for a bit?”

“No.” I pulled the towel away from my body, covering my breasts with my hands and turned my back for him to gather my hair, undo the braid and saturate the strands with shampoo.

His strong fingers massaging my scalp drew a moan from me. I couldn’t have controlled it. There was something so overwhelmingly beautiful about a man washing a woman’s hair. Maybe it was just me—but I couldn’t help thinking how much more sexy it would be if Reaper was my man while shaving me. I sighed.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“Are you sure?”

“No—I’m not sure.”

As he rinsed the conditioner from my hair, I resigned myself to imagine. There was nothing wrong with delving into my mind and fantasize Reaper was mine. That every hard, toned, beautiful inch of him belonged to me and I could kiss and touch all of him.

I turned in his arms—all thought of modesty gone. The clear water flowing over his skin made me delirious with arousal. I just couldn’t stand how good he looked to me then.

Instead, I me his gaze as he pushed strands of hair from my face and pared the water away with his large palms. Feeling his chest under my palms was magical. He was warm and inviting and all I wanted to do then was be closer to him.

Instead of speaking, I pushed upward and brushed my lips against his.

A low rumble escaped his chest. His fingers instantly tangled in my hair and tugged. I gasped, knowing then Reaper wasn’t vanilla in bed. He was the kind of man who could maul me and growl while doing it.

I wanted him to—needed him to.

Shamelessly, the little voice inside my head who was supposed to tell me to run, was dry humping the air in excitement.

I was doomed.

Reaper hesitated. I felt it in the way his body tensed beneath me. If he was anything like Swede and the others, he would second guess the hell out of this. I yearned to feel his mouth on mine, to know what he tasted like, to hear the sounds he would make for me as I stripped him fully and accepted him into my body.

While my mind wandered, Reaper took action. He tightened his fingers I my hair, pulled my head back further to expose my mouth to his and took my lips like a storm. I whimpered beneath his beautiful assault, accepted his tongue into my mouth then dragged my nails down his chest. Reaper caught my hand in his free one, and restrained it to my side.

Yes, this was the way a man was supposed to kiss a woman. Each pass of his tongue sent a charge of electricity through me, hardening my nipples and curling my toes. Each rumble to escape his chest, made me ease even closer to his chest. And every suck of his wonderful lips made me feel as if he was licking my entire body.

My entire body was burning. Suddenly I couldn’t breathe as his lust threatened to overwhelm me. I sighed and reluctantly pulled away.

Reaper’s eyes remained close. As I looked up into his face, I saw pain and that floored me.

“Reaper?”

“Mmm?”

“What’s wrong?”

“I shouldn’t have done that.”

I backed away from him and it was as if I remembered I was naked in front of this man. Turning away, I crossed my arms over my chest again.

Reaper dragged a tender finger down the length of my spine. “Don’t get shy on me now, Star.”

“I—you don’t want me. Damn, what was I thinking?”

“It’s not a lack of want,” Reaper said. “Trust me on this. It’s a lack of—it’s just not appropriate. You’re in danger and you’re scared, and I feel like I’m taking advantage. Then you’re going to wake up one morning and regret this.”

I said nothing.

“Nova, say something.”

“I don’t know what to say. I feel like an idiot.”

“That wasn’t what I wanted to happen. I guess I’m pushing you away for selfish reasons.” Reaper sighed behind me. He stepped from the tub and reached for a towel. “In the end, I go back to my darkness and you move on with your life. I don’t feel like being a fling for anyone—no matter how beautiful you are.”

“You think it’d only be a fling?”

“Of course. What else?”

I watched him pass the towel over his chest and couldn’t help thinking if he’d allow me, I could lick every drop of water from him. I shoved the thought to the dark corners of my mind and shifted away from him. “I would never use you like that. Honestly, I haven’t given myself to—can you just leave? I’d like to finish my shower now.”

“Star…”

“Reaper, I’m already embarrassed enough.”

“Just so you know.” Reaper strung the towel around his neck. “This isn’t about me not wanting you. Have you looked in the mirror lately? Christ, woman you’re stunning. And as hard as it is for me to walk away, I have to—you know I do.”

“Sure.”

I glanced at him then, offered a small smile but he didn’t seem convinced. When I nodded, he let himself out the door, leaving my heart in tatters.

Molly’s words about going after what I wanted raged through my head. Maybe she was right but I’d never been an aggressive kind of woman. I’ve never had a man fight so hard to keep his hands off me—hell, the last man I was with wasn’t even mine to begin with.

I pressed my forehead against the cold wall. The water pouring down my back where his fingers had played havoc with my senses and cried.