The stench of tobacco ruined the crispness of approaching dawn, though considering what Jax and I were about to do, I wasn’t going to tell him to snuff out his cigarette.
“She cut herself last night.” I rubbed my arms for warmth. Birds chirped an annoying morning song of delight, and I wished for a fucking pellet gun.
Jax took a drag from his cancer stick, and his lips rounded as he blew it out into the chilly morning air, creating rings. “Did you put a stop to it?”
“Fuck yeah, I shut it down.” I frowned. “Probably went too soft on her.”
“How’d you handle it?”
“Took my belt to her ass. Withheld orgasm.”
He snickered around another drag. “From what I remember, that works on her.”
I gave him a funny look. “How close were you to that fucked up situation on the island?”
“Not as close as you’re thinking. I was busy juggling work and the old man’s demands. But like I said, you and I used to talk. You told me things.”
“Fuck, Jax, when I saw her slicing herself up…I can’t fuck this up.”
“You’ll get there. You guys are still figuring shit out.”
“Yeah, well this latest disaster is creating a new problem. I don’t trust her to leave her alone. Not so soon after what happened.”
“Sounds like a simple fix to me. You rigged that bedroom to restrain her. Check underneath the end of the bed.”
I arched a brow. “Why’d we get this place?”
“In case shit went to hell on the island. I kinda pushed for it. You couldn’t see past imprisoning her on that island. Talk about single-minded focus.”
That seemed to be my problem when it came to her. Even back when she was fifteen, before I’d gone to prison, I couldn’t go near the De Luca mansion without my head getting stuck on the seductively forbidden jailbait of Alex fucking De Luca.
How ironic I’d gone away for something I hadn’t yet done. My pulse skyrocketed. Maybe I’d deserved that prison sentence. Eventually, I would have crossed the line.
Probably.
Definitely.
“Check under the bed, man. Do it before she wakes up. It’ll make things easier.” He reached for the doorknob. “We need to get going soon. Bastard never misses his morning jog. It’s fucking clockwork.”
“You don’t think he allowed access to any of the other guys?”
“Not a chance.” He chewed on his lip. “He allows very few people inside the estate, and now with Cleft gone…”
Now he had a chance to get inside, unobstructed, in hopes of finding his sister’s whereabouts.
We entered the shadowed house, and I padded down the hall, hoping Alex hadn’t awakened yet. Considering her late night date with a knife, and the subsequent lashing and sexual mind-fuck I’d put on her, I expected to find her out cold for at least another hour. The sun had barely crawled an inch above the horizon.
So I was caught off guard when I found her by the window, arms folded around her body as if she could ward off the next attack with sheer willpower alone. It would take a while before she believed no one was coming to hurt her. Perrone and the rest of his men would pay for what they’d done, and Jax and I would free those slaves today.
The real question though, was how far was I willing to go?
Gawking at Alex’s nude form, cast in silhouette in front of the window, I knew I’d go to the blazing pits of Lucifer’s den to ensure her safety, to give her peace of mind in knowing Lucas Perrone would never threaten her again.
I crossed to the bed and bent to search underneath, where I found a hook in the floor and a coiled chain attached. Despite my quiet presence, she didn’t stir from her stance. I sank to the hardwood and reached behind me, curling my fingers around a shackle.
“Alex?” God, how I wanted to wrap her in my arms and never let go. I’d failed her. No one should have to go through what she’d been through, the horrors she’d experienced, beginning with her own brother at the age of thirteen. But knowing what had happened to her all those years ago was vastly different from witnessing those bastards trying to break her.
How the fuck was I supposed to deal with that? How was she?
Maybe that was the problem. Neither one of us knew how to get beyond this. She’d finally let it out last night, but at what cost? More scars on her skin.
“Alex,” I said again.
She jumped, as if my voice was just now registering. “Sorry…I was thinking.”
“C’mere.” I patted the floor next to me. “What’s on your mind?”
Her feet glided across the hardwood, and she lowered next to me. “You.”
“What about me?”
“The way you made me feel last night. You helped me breathe, Rafe.”
“I left you fucking aroused as hell.”
“That part I’m not thrilled about, but the rest of it…”
“Sweetheart,” I said, pulling her to me so our mouths hovered close together, “then don’t piss me off again.”
Her breath escaped in a moist whisper against my lips. “Why are we sitting on the floor?”
“Give me your ankle, baby.”
“Why?”
“Don’t question or argue. Just do it.”
She scooted her butt and rested her foot in my lap. I pulled the shackle from underneath the bed, and she tried yanking away, but I held firm and locked the metal around her ankle.
“What’s that for?” Her voice shook, and she glanced around us, eyes wide.
“To keep you safe.” I jumped to my feet and headed toward the bathroom. The chain slid along the floor as she followed, and my fucking cock wanted out to play.
Damn. Chaining her up was a turn-on.
Before she could enter behind me, I slammed the door and locked it. Her fists pounded on the wood, her voice high-pitched with frantic questions. I ignored them, and for the moment, I ignored her.
Taking stock of the bathroom, I began by studying the mirror. If she broke it, she might try to slit her wrists like she had in that cabin, when Zach had taken her.
I shook my head, letting out a long breath. I didn’t think she’d do it. She loved me, was happy here with me, but something had set her off last night. I didn’t want to chance her doing something stupid while Jax and I were gone. I grabbed the plunger, turned it around, and used the handle to break the mirror. The pieces fell into the sink, and a few chunks dropped to the floor.
The pounding on the door grew in intensity.
Grabbing the wastebasket, I carefully picked up the glass and tossed the pieces into the trash. Next, I searched the medicine cabinet and drawers for anything she could use against herself. The razors went the way of the mirror. The tub was the only danger left, but I couldn’t see her drowning herself. She was too terrified of water. Besides, I didn’t think she was suicidal, just unpredictable when it came to coping.
Satisfied the bathroom was safe, I unlocked the door, yanked it open, and squeezed past her. She pitter-pattered after me, on my heels as I carried the trashcan toward the hall.
“Please don’t go,” she said. “I need you. Let’s just run away and leave this place.”
The chain stopped her from pursuing me, and she let out a curse. I entered the kitchen and dumped the glass and razors into the trash. Jax raised a brow, one corner of his mouth curving up in a smirk. A cup of coffee steamed between his hands. “I knew your badass self was still in there somewhere.”
“Shut up,” I said as I grabbed some granola bars and a few other food items to get her by for a few hours.
Jax’s laugh carried into the hall, and I shut the door, silencing his know-it-all attitude. She sat on the bed, the picture of defeat, though her eyes spit fire at me. I set the food on the dresser, along with Jax’s cell.
“I’m only leaving the phone in case of an emergency.”
“You mean in case you don’t come back.”
“I will come back, Alex. But if it takes longer, or…”
“I get it. You want me to be safe. It’s always about that, isn’t it?” She lifted her foot. “Hence the fucking leash.” She drew in a deep breath. “If I never see another chain again, it’ll be too soon.”
“I’m sorry, baby.” I crawled onto the bed, but she turned her head away.
Grabbing her chin, I forced her mouth my way and captured her lips. She turned to liquid in my arms, her body sinking into the bed under me. I followed, my hands and knees depressing the mattress on either side of her. She brought a leg up and flung it over my back, and the chain clinked through the devious parts of my mind.
I nibbled her lips, lowered to her tits and caught a nipple between my teeth. She cried out, and her fingers gripped my shoulders, holding me to her.
“Stay with me. Please, Rafe. I have a bad feeling. Every time we think things are gonna get better, something bad happens.”
“Not this time.” I inched down her body, lowering between her legs, and buried my face in her pussy. I fucking made her forget everything—what Jax and I were about to do, how I was going to leave her chained to my bed. I made her forget her own name because she was too busy crying out mine.
I glided my tongue between her folds, my fingers working her cunt, and she shuddered, muscles spasming as the orgasm claimed her. I sat up and licked my lips. “That was me saying I’m sorry.” Before she could stop me, I slipped from bed and spanned the distance to the door.
“I’ll never forgive you for this!” She threw a pillow at my head, but I easily dodged it and tossed it back.
“Yes you will. Our whole fucking existence is based on forgiveness. I love you,” I said, pulling the door open. “See you soon.”