Merryn
The wind feels good, blowing through my hair.
I’m sitting in the passenger seat of a car. Jake’s car. He got a car recently. My belly is huge and I rub it, feeling the warmth of my baby inside of me.
Jake’s got the windows rolled down. We’re flying through the streets of Santa Espera. I can’t quite tell what time it is, but the sun is out. Maybe noon? I can’t remember when we got this car.
“When did we get this car?” I shout over the rush of wind.
But Jake must not hear me. He turns his head and gives me a smile, reaches over, takes my hand in his and gives it a squeeze. Then he puts both hands back on the wheel and keeps driving.
We’re driving south, towards the edge of town. Buildings whip past us, other cars seem like they’re standing still. The faces of pedestrians seem to blur into unrecognizable masses. We keep driving, getting closer and closer to the edge.
Jake puts on some music. It blares in my ears, some tune I haven’t heard before. Rock music. He nods his head along with it. Minutes pass. I look out the windshield and see the edge of town, yet even though we’re driving so fast, it doesn’t seem to be getting any closer.
“Jake?” I yell. “Where are we going?”
“Out,” he says. A single word.
I look out the windshield again and see buildings whiz by, people standing on the sidewalks, watching us pass. But we’re not getting any closer to the highways at the edge of the city.
“Jake!” I shout, the wind making me almost deaf to my own ears. “Jake, we can’t leave!”
He turns his head, smiles at me, presses down harder on the gas. The car speeds up. But the edge of the city stays in the same place.
“Jake, we’re stuck here!” I shout. I’m starting to panic now. “Jake, we can’t leave!”
He presses down harder. I’m looking at him. He’s staring, determined, out of the windshield. His mouth opens and I see words form on his lips.
“Will Silver.”
I turn my head and my heart almost stops when I see PharmaChem right in front of us, its huge metal and glass face approaching at an alarming speed. And standing there in front of it is Will Silver. He doesn’t move. He smiles instead, daring us with his eyes.
“Jake, look out!”
But it’s too late. PharmaChem speeds towards us and we smash into Will, smash into the wall, the front of the car crumpling as Jake and the baby and I are thrown out of our seats, my head smashing through the windshield—
I sit up, gasping for air. My heart is pounding. My body is covered in sweat beneath the T-shirt and pajama pants I’m wearing. Even though I only have a single bed sheet covering me, I feel so hot and sticky. I kick it off, still catching my breath. I flop back down on the pillow and put a hand to my heart to steady it, feeling the rapid thump-thump-thump of it against my chest.
It was a dream. But it felt so real. Jake was there. He was right there.
It takes me a moment to realize that I can’t see the opposite wall clearly. I blink a few times, but it looks hazy. Pushing myself back up to sitting, I realize that the room is filled with fog again. Just like last night.
Is this another dream?
I look over and Trista’s window is open. There’s a dull glow from the streetlamps. And then I hear it: the unmistakable roar of a motorcycle engine.
Jake!
I swing my legs around and climb off the bed, moving quickly to the window where I stick my head out, peering down. There he is. Jake. Sitting on his motorcycle, both hands on the handlebars. He’s looking up at me, revving his engine, making it roar and roar.
“Jake,” I call out. My voice sounds muffled from the fog. He blinks. He looks sad.
“Merryn,” he says. He sounds far away, like I’m hearing his voice from across a wide chasm. “I’m sorry.”
I shake my head, the tears already coming. “No, don’t be sorry. We both made mistakes. We were both wrong.”
He blinks again and I see the shining trail of a tear rolling down his cheek. “No,” he says. “What I did was terrible. I acted in the worst possible way.”
I swallow, an idea coming to me. “Wait there,” I say, and pull my head back in the window. If this is my dream …
I skirt around the bed and go to Trista’s bedroom door. I pull it open, the sound of it quieted by the fog. It’s crept into the hallway too. I look down and see the door at the end of the hallway closed. Moving quietly, I pad down the stairs to the front door and unlock it, stepping through into the foyer, and then outside.
The fog is still here. Jake is still here. He’s still sitting on his motorcycle, watching me. I’m not wearing any shoes and the sidewalk feels harsh against my bare feet.
“Jake,” I say in a softer voice, now that we’re so close. “I’ve missed you so much.”
“I’ve missed you too,” he says. His expression is somber. When I reach him he slips a hand around my back. It feels so good to feel his touch again. If this is my dream …
I lean up, bringing my head towards his, and tilt my head to kiss him. He kisses me back. We hold together for a long while. I reach up and slide a hand under his leather jacket, feeling his hard body beneath the white T-shirt he’s wearing. Finally I drop down from the kiss.
“Come upstairs,” I say in a soft voice. His eyes are on mine. A smile reaches his lips.
He turns off the motorcycle, swinging a leg over and climbing off. I take his hand in mine and lead him back into Trista’s apartment, up the stairs, the two of us moving quietly, our footsteps muffled by the fog that fills the air.
We go into Trista’s bedroom and quietly shut the door. My heart hammers inside of my chest. I can feel our baby moving, as though it’s waken up, knowing that Daddy is near. I lead Jake over to Trista’s bed and we sit down on it, side by side, like we’re on a first date in grade school. Jake looks in my eyes. I look in his. And then I lean forward and kiss him again, putting my hand on his leg, feeling how close he is to me.
Our mouths move together in synchronicity. It’s everything I remember and more. We lean back together on the bed and Jake lifts himself up on one elbow, hovering over me as we kiss. His hand finds my shoulder, moves around, down, circling around my large belly. He slides it back up again and I feel him grab my breast. He finds my nipple, already hard and pushing out from my shirt. I gasp when he touches it, causing trickles of hot electricity to sparkle down my spine to the place in between my legs.
I reach down and find the side of his body with my hand. It slips under his jacket and then his T-shirt. His body is hot and hard. My breath trembles against his lips as he touches me, as I touch him. I slide my hand down and reach the top of his jeans. Slide around to the front and the tent in his pants is stiff and strong.
I moan, rubbing it. His hips begin to buck, pushing towards me. The hand on my breast slides down, moving over my stomach and below, to the top of my pajama pants. He slips his fingers easily beneath the waistband and into my panties. I feel him push past my bush of pubic hair and then he reaches my pussy. I moan out loud as he slides a finger through my wetness, rubbing my hard and pulsing clit, slipping into me and making me want more.
I reach down with my other hand too and quickly fumble his jeans open. The clink of his belt, the zip of his zipper, and then I slip my hand inside and feel it. Him. His enormous cock, throbbing in my hand.
I start to stroke him as he fingers me, our hands moving at the same time, speeding up together. Our lips continue moving, our tongues pushing out, trying to reach as far into the other’s mouth as possible.
I can feel the pressure build up inside of me and my body writhes on the bed as Jake keeps thrusting himself against me, his cock fucking my hand. My heart is pounding. I feel lightheaded. And then the pleasure rises up and I climax, crying out against his mouth, my pussy thrusting up and meeting his hand, forcing more of him into me, pushing me further and further into this land of exquisite feeling.
When my orgasm subsides I feel Jake lift himself to sitting. He pulls his hand out of my pussy and grabs the waistband of my pajama pants with both hands. My head is still swimming, but I lift up enough to allow him to push them and my panties down. When he’s done with that he grabs his own pants and pushes them down, freeing his hard cock from its confines. His hands find my body and I allow myself to be moved, laid down on my side as he comes in from behind, my ass pushing out and my legs parting enough to allow him to slip inside of me.
I gasp. Jake feels incredible in my aching pussy. He shrugs off his leather jacket and lays down behind me, his body encircling, cradling my own, our upper halves separated by two thin T-shirts. My belly sits comfortably on the bed and Jake’s hand lays over top of it, slides up to under my breasts, pulling me closer so that all parts of us are touching.
I moan, trying my best to keep my voice down despite the fact that I’m dreaming. Jake’s cock slides in and out of my pussy. His hips thrust up into my ass, pushing a deeper sort of pleasure down through my loins. I find his hand with mine and our fingers entwine. His nose and lips nuzzle through my hair to the back of my neck, up to my ear. His breathing is hot, measured, trembling.
I feel so close to him. My eyes close and I revel in this feeling, in this exquisite love that exists between us. Jake fucks me like this for what feels like hours, our bodies moving together on the bed, his cradling mine, holding me close, safe. His hand finds my breast and I breathe in deep when he squeezes it, filling me with more pleasure.
“Oh god, Merryn,” he moans in my ear and I clasp his hand tighter. “Merryn …”
His breathing is getting choppier. I feel his movements come on stronger. Knowing and sensing and experiencing his pleasure through him drives me wild, and in between my legs and all throughout my body I tighten, rise higher, higher.
“Fuck, Merryn … oh god … oh god!”
Suddenly Jake comes, his body stiffening and thrusting out hard. I gasp and tremble as my own orgasm rocks through me, carried on the back of his. We come at the same time, our bodies pulled so closely together, moving together, as one.
When it’s finally over I relax, and I feel Jake relax against me. We’re both breathing deeply. My skin is covered in a sheen of sweat, but that’s fine now.
“Jake,” I say in a sleepy voice. “I love you.”
He squeezes me. “I love you too,” comes his low voice, and then I slip off to sleep.
When I wake up I’m lying on my side on the bed. I’m on top of the sheets, and my pajama pants and panties are off. Morning light streams in through the window. I blink, rolling onto my back. I’m alone.
Jesus … did I masturbate in my sleep? What a vivid dream.
But when I sit up, something warm and wet seeps out of me, from between my legs. I freeze, feeling it pool against my thighs. Then I reach down and feel it, feel the wetness against my fingertips. I bring my hand back up and look at it. The soft smell of it reaches my nostrils.
It smells like Jake.