Chapter 23
Fun fact: orgasms don’t get old. However, I’m already desperate to graduate to a two-person orgasm.
Yes, I think about more than sex. But imagine discovering sex for the very first time. I’ve read about teenagers, so I don’t feel one bit ashamed about my current obsession.
However, the guys sure as hell haven’t come around. In fact, they’ve made it easy to adjust to my new form this past week because they’ve avoided me more than I’ve avoided them.
I tried leaving the house. It was a terrible thing to attempt, since I sort of got lost fifteen times, and kept having to zap back and forth. Ezekiel finally asked me not to leave without them, since I have no idea how easy to kill I may or may not be.
Another fun fact: I heal as fast as they do. I cut open my finger with a kitchen knife, and the wound sealed almost immediately. I wasn’t a fan of the pain, but it was a good learning exercise.
Don’t worry, I know their weapons won’t allow me to heal as fast.
I’ve seen them in action, so I go ghostly when they’re strapped with weapons and off to reap some souls. They’ve done a lot of reaping this past week, staying gone longer and longer.
Me? I’ve just been hanging out in my flesh.
They’ve kept the fridge stocked with sandwich stuff, and they drop me off takeout when they bring home food. It’s probably the most thoughtful thing they’ve done for me.
Ever.
I’m assuming at the rate I heal that I can’t starve to death, but it’s nice to not be hungry. Downside? Not one bag of popcorn has shown up in either kitchen.
Anyway, as long as I’m in flesh, I don’t ache for their presence. Another plus.
Everything evens out, I suppose.
I haven’t seen one bouquet of roses show up at my door, so I’m assuming they aren’t going to buy me any. And I have no money to go buy my own or decorate my room.
I’ve also learned to never drink that damn liquor they get from Harold. I choked half a jar of that shit down, and the next thing I knew, I woke up on the bathroom floor.
Not. Pleasant.
So far, I’m sucking my first week of being a real girl. But it’s the best week of my life.
A knock at my door tells me they’re delivering more food, which is odd, since they only dropped some off less than an hour ago.
I open the door not expecting to find the four of them loitering in the hallway. Ezekiel is the only one who looks directly at me.
“We’re going to the club. Thought you might want to come,” he says with a smirk.
The other three all give me a look of amusement I don’t particularly understand.
Their words finally resonate, and a smile flits across my face. “Are you inviting me?”
He shrugs.
“You’ve done good not to leave the house without us, so we figured it only right to reward you with something you want to do,” Kai tells me, a smug look on his face.
“How thoughtful,” I state, draining as much sarcasm into the two words as humanly possible.
Ha! Humanly possible. Fairly sure I’m not too human.
His lips twitch, and Jude turns away to smirk at the wall instead of in my face.
“We’ve been worked up this week, since you riled us up and left us hanging. It’s getting distracting, so we’ll be bringing you a show tonight, if you’re interested in watching, that is,” Gage drawls, his eyes cutting toward me.
I’ve experienced jealousy a multitude of times, but never so much of it that it left my stomach feeling lined with lead and dragging me down. I also have to swallow back a bit of bile, even as I force a smile.
Right.
I prepared for this. I knew this was coming. They’ve already gone much longer without a woman than I expected.
“Good. Then tonight I can hopefully do some shopping of my own and find out once and for all if I’m a virgin or not,” I chirp, trying to sound enthusiastic so they don’t see the unfounded way it hurts to know they’re choosing another.
They all give me an indescribably blank stare, almost eerie.
“Virgin?” Kai asks incredulously.
“Fairly certain I’m not, but I’m not entirely sure what I’m searching for or if my fingers are long enough—”
“I’ll see you guys at the club,” Jude grumbles, turning and siphoning away.
They all look freshly showered. I spent two hours in the incredible bathtub in my bathroom today, so I know I’m clean enough. Baths are my favorite thing about skin. The water feels amazing. And I don’t have to even bother drying off if I don’t feel like it.
One quick flick from real to ghostly and I’m dry and clothed.
Flicking out to my ghostly form, I opt for a sexy pair of leather pants, and a pink crop top that shows just a hint of my stomach.
My hair falls in loose curls around my shoulders, and I check the mirror, smiling at the fresh look.
A groan catches my attention as Kai vanishes, and Ezekiel runs a hand through his hair as he gives me a look of exhausted patience. His gaze flicks angrily to Gage before he’s gone as well, and I shrug.
“Can I hitch a ride with you?” I ask him.
He gives me a curt grin and flips me off before he also leaves.
Guess I’m going to them.
Rolling my eyes, I lose my skin. I can’t sense them in flesh—only in my untouchable state can I locate them anymore.
It takes me a minute, but I finally feel them, and I siphon myself inside the…men’s bathroom.
Yeah, I can only go where I’ve been before, so this is…awkward.
Five guys lined up at the urinal look at me as I poke my head out of the stall door. One looks away, then his gaze darts back to me as his eyebrows rise.
Clearing my throat, I push all the way through the door, and flash them a grin. “Oops,” I say, shrugging. “Wrong bathroom.”
I walk like a boss, other than that wobble in my high heels…that will have to go. Heels are way harder to walk in when gravity is involved.
Just as I pass one very tattooed guy, I back up, my eyes dropping to the dick in his hands, seeing four piercings down the shaft of it. Jude has those.
“Can I ask if those are painful when you have sex?” I ask him, peering up to his very blue eyes.
His lips twist in a grin. “Not at all. And it’d probably be the best thing you’ve ever felt.”
My cheeks get hot for no apparent reason, and I’m almost tempted to fan myself. No wonder the girls Jude takes over the edge always act like their dying and going to heaven.
Interesting analogy there.
It’s never struck me as ironic until now.
I glance down, wondering if any of these other guys have piercings like the other guys. I see none, but I do get a couple of incredulous gawks.
Shaking my head clear from my inner ramblings, I pat Mr. Tattoo’s arm. “Good to know. Gives me more alone-time material.”
His grin only grows, and I walk on out the door, and into the chaotic club scene. The music is pumping as loudly as ever, but like never before, I feel those heavy beats in my chest, vibrating through my body as though the music is alive.
My smile practically takes up my whole face.
Before I take another step, I let my feet go phantom, and change my shoes into some cute flats that aren’t going to send me face-planting.
Then I walk out into the madness, feeling the heat from all the writhing bodies as they brush against me with varying types of fabric that range from abrasive to divine.
My sensory stimulation has me closing my eyes, absorbing all the contact I didn’t realize I could enjoy so much.
Just physical contact is enough to soothe the ache in my chest.
It’s so much more empowering and addicting than I realized it could be. I’m dancing before I even reach the crowded dance floor, grinding with anyone and everyone who wants to dance like we’re overly familiar.
Moving through the throngs of people, I start to feel eyes on me. I whirl around, and my gaze collides with Jude.
He’s standing on an overhead balcony, his gaze burning through me, as Ezekiel and Gage seem to be having an argument of some kind.
Kai is nowhere to be seen, and I break my gaze away, until I finally spot Three on the dancefloor, a pretty blonde curled against him. I thought he preferred brunettes.
His eyes flick to me, and he smirks as the girl presses into him. My heart is pounding in my ears as the sting of betrayal slithers into me.
They prefer a stranger.
Because I’ll never be good enough.
Before I can look away, Jude moves in behind the woman, fitting his body against her as they press her between them. Her entire body flushes as she leans back on him, and Jude barely spares me a glance.
The only thing that keeps me from leaving and going home to find earplugs is the guy suddenly blocking my vision, and a drink being put in front of me.
“Hello again,” I say to Mr. Tattoo Dick Piercings as he grins down at me.
“Usually by the time a girl sees my dick, I’ve bought her at least a few of these,” he tells me, smirking. “And I can assure you it’s far more impressive when I’m turned on,” he adds.
“Are you saying this drink is drugged and you only get it up for incapacitated girls?” I deadpan, arching an eyebrow.
He bursts out laughing, shaking his head. He takes a generous sip of the drink, like he’s taking a test, then passes it to me as his eyes sparkle with humor.
He’s not as freakishly gorgeous as the four of them, but he’s still attractive. He’s also flirty and fun.
“Just how impressive are we talking?” I ask him, sipping my non-drugged drink.
His smile spreads. “Never had a complaint in the past,” he says, making his voice carry over the music.
“And what’s the usual standard. It’s only right for me to have all the facts before handing you my virginity,” I go on.
He laughs again, quieter this time. “Funny girl. I’m Neal, by the way.”
When he sticks his hand out, I slide mine into his, letting him shake it as I savor the feel of someone touching me with skin. It’s not as consuming or drugging as when the guys touch me, but it’s…nice.
Like him.
“I’m…Keyla,” I tell him, though it’s a little hollow, since that’s not my true name but the one given to me by Ezekiel.
Those tattoos on this guy are misleading, because he looks like a hardened criminal, when really he’s a fluffy teddy bear.
My hand moves to his chest, and I take back the fluffy part. His body is pretty damn hard.
His smile falters, and something lights in his eyes as he steps closer. “Please tell me you’re not the kind of girl to tease and walk away.”
“I’m actually not sure what kind of girl I am, to be honest, but I’m not in a teasing mood,” I assure him.
He runs his thumb along my bottom lip, and though those sparks are absent, I still enjoy the comfort in his touch and the dreamy way he’s looking at me.
He’s totally in the pile of possible true loves.
“I like the way you talk,” he tells me.
Weird compliment, but sure. I’ll take it. “I like the way you talk too,” I decide to say, returning what must be a common courtesy, and his grin kicks back up.
He presses even closer, lining our bodies up as he starts to move to the music. The sexy song sets a rhythm for our bodies to move to, and his eyes stay locked on mine. He’s so tall and broad-shouldered that I can’t see around him to know if the guys have already taken the girl home, or if they’re still luring her into their trap.
It’s a welcome distraction.
My eyes flick to his lips, wondering what it would be like to kiss him. Would it be as powerful with him? No. I know that much, simply because I’m not on fire just from his touch.
But it’s only because I’ve fantasized about the guys so long that I’ve built up everything too much in my head. It’s a trick my brain is playing on me, telling me everything is better than it is to keep it from miserably failing to meet expectations.
His hand slides up and slowly pushes into my hair, tugging my head back, and I suck in a breath, because it looks like I’m already going to find out what that kiss feels like.
My eyes flutter shut reflexively, and as soon as they do, I’m stumbling forward as the loss of his body causes my eyes to fly open. Then they widen, because Neal is on the ground, looking dazed as he tries to get up.
Jude is glaring at me as he steps in front of me, and I feel Kai press against me from behind before I see him.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” I demand, looking up at Jude like he’s lost his damned mind.
“We decided we don’t want you touching anyone while you’re staying with us,” Kai supplies, still standing too close to my back.
“Oh? Well, does that mean you four will also refrain?” I ask, narrowing my eyes.
Jude smirks. “No. But we’ll let you watch, and you can touch yourself.”
“Unbelievable,” I mutter, shoving by him.
Neal is just standing up when Gage and Ezekiel shoulder by him so hard it sends him to his ass again. Gage looks like he wants to kill me.
Ezekiel looks like he wants to kill Neal.
I give up. These guys are impossible.
And super selfish.
I change my direction, heading into the thick mass of people. I’ll go back to the bathroom and siphon myself to another club I’ve gone to with them before.
I shift directions again, staying low so they can’t see me, and finally come out to where Neal is. He gives me a surprised look when he almost runs into me.
“Boyfriend or brother?” he asks me, a nervous laugh following.
“Neither. Just a terrible roommate. Actually, four terrible roommates. I’ll ditch them if you want to meet me at the club down the street.”
His grin grows. “That sounds like a setup.”
I shrug. “Your choice, Neal. If not you, I’ll find someone else.”
He grabs my hand before I can turn away, and he tugs me back. “My place in an hour if you’re serious. We’ll skip the club and do Netflix and chill. You got your phone?”
I don’t have a phone, but I elect to be vague.
“Not on me.”
“It’s the Martine apartment complex on the corner of Lexington and Pike. 1501B. Just ring me and I’ll buzz you up.”
“I’ll be there,” I tell him with a smile, but my smile falters when I see Jude making his way toward us on one side, and Kai coming in from the other.
“Gotta go. I’ll see you there,” I tell him, then turn and dart away.
I’m looking behind me, checking for the two unpredictable psychos, when I slam into an unrelenting, hard body.
Cursing, I look up with dread, and find Gage as he snakes an arm around my waist and starts dragging me out. I’ll let them think they’ve won.
For an hour.
Then I’ll go see Neal and find out if he’s my one true love so I can just dive in and start my life.
Gage basically drags me out of the club, even as I struggle a little, putting on a show. He knows I can’t just disappear. I’m not supposed to draw attention to myself, and a girl disappearing will definitely raise a few eyebrows.
As soon as we’re outside, I jerk out of his grip, and glare at him.
“I’m not really sure you guys ever hear the stupid that comes out of your mouths. I can watch you? But I can’t touch anyone?” I ask, shaking my head.
“I didn’t say that,” he tells me as Ezekiel comes up and tosses me over his shoulder like a barbarian.
I’m going to smother them in their sleep tonight.
“If you don’t think the same way, then put me down. I can promise you I have no intentions of watching you four paw all over another woman, all while you tell me how toxic I am for you. I’m certainly not going to let you dictate whether or not my vagina gets christened or not.”
“Can’t do that,” Ezekiel growls, sounding much too angry. “I told you this would happen,” he adds, glaring back at Gage.
“This was Kai’s idea. We never considered she’d be this fucking annoying and shameless.”
“I’ve told you I lost shame a long time ago. I have the four of you to thank for that,” I remind them, groaning as Ezekiel continues to carry me.
As soon as we reach the park, he siphons us, and the next step we take is inside his living room. He dumps me to the couch, dropping me like it burns too much to hold me another second, just as Kai and Jude appear in the room.
“Unless we lock her up, it’ll do no fucking good to leave her here,” Kai gripes, apparently carrying on a conversation I’ve already missed part of.
“Can’t lock her up, jackass. She can just pass through walls. Not even soul stone keeps her in,” Jude growls.
“I can assure you there’s no way you can confine me,” I decide to interject, earning a murderous glare from Kai before he directs his attention to Ezekiel and Gage.
“I told you it was pushing her too far, but you had to be a dick,” Ezekiel says as he starts making a sandwich.
“I find this all utterly ridiculous and a complete double standard. Why is it okay for the four of you to take home another girl but I can’t bring home a guy?” I ask seriously.
“Because we’re guys. It’s allowed,” Kai states just as seriously.
“I’m going to pretend you’re not referring to archaic social proprieties, considering you have none, and try not to stab you for that completely chauvinist remark.”
They don’t even glance my way, as they continue talking amongst themselves.
“No girl or her. Those are currently our options if we expect her to stay chaste while we wait things out,” Ezekiel tells them.
I nod in agreement.
“She doesn’t have to stay with us, then we don’t have to see her with other men,” Jude bites out, even though he seems to say it with strain.
Kai disappears from the room, and I hear him cursing above us as heavy footsteps stomp around the second floor.
“You want me gone now?” I ask, my voice a little quieter as I look at Jude.
He gives me a look that has me flicking my flesh switch off so that I become untouchable.
“No. I unfortunately don’t want you gone. But for whatever reason, I can’t physically allow you to be with another man. At the same time, I can’t physically stand to be without the feel of a woman much longer, or I need to kill something to work off the steam. You’re driving us all crazy.”
Pinching the bridge of my nose, I blow out a frustrated breath. “I honestly don’t even know how to deal with you right now. Neal might have been my future true love, and I didn’t even get to tell him that I was looking forward to finding out. Instead, I ran off after you four morons barged in like cavemen.”
It grows quiet, and I look up to see the three of them just staring at me for a moment.
“You were going to tell him he might be your future true love?” Gage asks, studying me intently.
“Yes. In case you haven’t noticed, I like to be honest in my intentions from the start. If things change, I’ll inform him,” I state matter-of-factly.
Jude seems to fight a smile for no real reason. Their mood swings grew old months ago.
“Then I suppose we should let you do that,” Jude says, still fighting a smile. “You can go back to the club.”
“He actually gave me his apartment number,” I boast, feeling like I accomplished something, considering the very limited time frame I had to meet anyone tonight.
Ezekiel surprises me the most as he takes a seat. “Then I guess we shouldn’t stop you. True love is nothing to mess with,” he says seriously, though I swear I hear a hint of amusement.
In fact, they weirdly all look a little amused, when only moments ago it seemed like they were ready to kill someone.
“You’ll seriously let me go?” I ask, glancing back at the time. It’s only been thirty minutes…
“Like E said, can’t mess with true love. Even we have boundaries, Key,” Jude tells me, his tone very close to mocking.
“Then I have thirty minutes to kill, because he said to be there in an hour.”
“You should go now,” Ezekiel urges. “Guys prefer for a girl to be much earlier than expected. The more eager you seem, the better.”
I don’t really trust them, so I siphon away quickly, making sure they don’t stow away and ruin my moment with Neal. I land in the cemetery they frequent, then start asking people for directions when I turn whole.
It takes a little while, but I finally find the building and buzz the appropriate apartment. I think.
But he doesn’t answer.
“Already here?” I hear him ask, causing me to whirl around to see him as he grins at me from the sidewalk.
I’m actually late, but I know for a fact men hate it when you correct them. I’ve learned a lot since trying to be a real girl.
“I ditched them faster than anticipated,” I tell him with a shrug. “There’s something I need to tell you before we go any farther.”
His grin only grows. “I can’t wait to hear it, as long as it’s no freaky secret,” he says, holding his hands up, though a teasing glint seems to be in his eyes.
Smiling back at him, I blurt it all out.