Chapter 3
“FURY? FURY?” A woman’s voice penetrated the fog encasing my head. I blinked against the brightness, then realized it was candlelight and even that was hurting my head. I tried to sit up, but Elan pushed me back. Hecate was standing in back of her, staring at me with a concerned look on her face.
“Elan…where am I?”
“You’re in your room, at UnderBarrow. Queet summoned Hecate to your aid, and she brought you here. Can you sit up yet, or do you need to lie back down?” Elan bathed my forehead with a cool cloth, and I closed my eyes, enjoying the feeling of water against my skin.
I felt like I had been burned raw by the fire, and I probably had, at least on an auric level. I knew that I wasn’t hurt physically—at least no more than when I took down an Abom. But psychically, I felt like a piece of raw meat. I drifted as she continued to wash my head.
“Fury?” Hecate’s voice brought me to attention. I could ignore the others, but I couldn’t ignore her.
“Yes?” I croaked out, my throat feeling scratchy.
“If you can sit up and tell us what happened, please do. We’ll help you.” She was firm, but caring, yet it was a demand rather than a request.
I groaned, but let Elan and Tam roll me to a sitting position. Patrice padded the headboard with pillows so I was propped up when they lay me back.
I squinted. The light didn’t seem so bad this time. “I’m thirsty. What time is it?”
“It’s almost dawn. You’ve been out for a long time. Here, drink this.” Tam held a cup to my lips.
I took a drink and sighed again. It was mint tea and honey, soothing to the senses as well as to the throat. I drank again, and then another sip before he took it away.
“You don’t want to drink too much, too fast, or you might throw up,” he said, stroking my hair back from my face. He sat down on the bed and leaned in.
“No, you don’t want to take this on—”
Tam’s kiss could heal. He could take on my pain and sweep it away from me with a touch or a kiss. I didn’t want him to know just how rough I was feeling, but he pushed aside my protests and pressed his lips to mine, kissing me deeply.
As the kiss intensified, the weariness began to drain out of my joints and muscles, and the fire that still burned in my thoughts vanished under a wave of cool, calm water that rolled in like the tide. I kissed him back then, drawing more strength from him. He could handle it, and I reveled as the scorched and blackened sensation began to wash away. Finally, I pulled away.
Tam held my chin, staring deep into my eyes. “My love, I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry. You were burning like the desert sun. So much pain…”
“I’m all right now, thanks to you. And thanks to Hecate, whom I assume brought me back off the Crossroads.” And it was true—I felt much better. Tired and hungry, and deeply thirsty, but I didn’t feel charred to the bone anymore.
Hecate moved over to sit by my bed. Tam scooched away to give her room. He crawled over me to sit beside me and wrapped his arm around my shoulders. Elan handed him the cup of tea. He held it to my lips, even though I was strong enough to take the glass myself, and I drained it dry. The mint and honey ran through me like a sweet balm.
“Tell us what you saw.” Hecate looked strained. “I know it was something powerful, but I can’t quite grasp what it was.”
I cleared my throat as the images flooded back. “I went into the fire. I had to in order to destroy the zombie the Abom had co-opted. After I burned him to ashes, the flame drew me deeper. There was something else there—it wasn’t just the flame, but a deep, dark force that welcomed me. I tried to resist but finally, I gave up and let it take me where it wanted.”
“That sounds like the edge of Vision, the chasm that most oracles come to, and they have to willingly drop into it in order to activate the sight. I didn’t know you had that ability.”
“I didn’t either. Anyway, I let it take me. When I opened my eyes, I was standing in front of the World Tree. And Gaia was there. She was so massive she blotted out the sky.” I couldn’t help it, as I spoke of the Great Mother, I was caught up in the wonder again, and I paused, closing my eyes to drift in her immensity once more.
“Gaia…” It wasn’t a question, but more of a whisper. Hecate leaned forward, staring at me. “The Earth Mother came to you? What did she say?”
I described her, and then what had happened. “She showed me where to find the gate to the realm of Chaos, and she told me who to go to in order to destroy it. When we destroy this gate, all the other gates to Chaos on all the other World Trees will vanish. The Order of the Black Mist won’t be able to open the doors no matter what they do.”
Everybody in the room was silent, including Hecate. I finally turned to her. “Do you know Heimdall?”
She shook her head. “No, but Thor and Freya do. I think he’s out here with them at New Valhalla—the temple they’re building out in the woods.” After a pause, she added, “I’m both stunned and grateful. But Fury, if Gaia came to you, then she’s been watching the course of events. If we don’t stop Lyon, you can guarantee she’ll take it into her own hands, and when Gaia moves, everybody stands a chance to lose.”
“Which means we don’t have a choice. She offered me the solution. We have to try it.” I shifted, fully awake now. Even though I was tired and hungry, I felt strangely alive, as if every cell in my body was vibrating. “I want to get up.”
“You should rest a little longer—” Tam started to say, but I pushed back the covers and shooed him off the bed.
“No, we have things to do.” I realized I was in a nightgown. “Patrice, can you get me one of my gauze skirts and a tank top?” To the others, I said, “I’m getting dressed. You can stay or wait outside.”
Jason and Elan quickly withdrew from the room. Hecate also. Tam stayed while Patrice helped me dress. My body was stiff, but a lot less stiff than it used to be, even with taking down an Abom. All my training sessions were paying off.
“Patrice, in a while, after we’ve talked, I’ll need a massage.”
“Yes, milady.” She was as good of a masseuse as any other I’d had. “Just let me know when.” She hung my nightgown over the clothing rack. “Are you hungry? Should I bring you some breakfast?”
I glanced at Tam. “We should hold a meeting of the Sea-Council this morning.”
“I can gather people in an hour. That will give you a chance to eat. Patrice, please get my Fury some breakfast. I think fruit, eggs, and bread would be best after what she went through.” He pulled me to him as Patrice discreetly withdrew. When she had shut the door behind her, he leaned in, kissing me deeply as his hands caressed my back. “Oh, Fury, I was so worried. I know it’s your job, but I always fear for you when you chase after the Abominations. They could drain your soul if they catch you.”
“I know what they can do, love.” I burrowed into his embrace. “But I’m growing stronger every day, and my training with Hecate is increasing my power.” I rested my head on his shoulder. “I am afraid, though. Going back into Seattle to destroy the portal to the realm of Chaos isn’t going to be easy. You know Lyon will have his men swarming the tree, looking for it. That’s why we have to move, and move fast.”
“I will send an army with you to protect you, if it comes to it.” Tam paused, then—his hands on my shoulders—pushed me back a few steps. “Fury, six months ago, when we started on our way here, I told you that I had something to ask you. Well, I waited. I waited because we were in the midst of so many things. But I realize that there will never be a time where we’re in a lull. So now, I’m ready.”
My breath caught in my throat.
He took my hand in his. “Fury, Kaeleen Donovan. In the past six months, you’ve come to mean more to me than anyone has in a thousand years. In my world this seems quick, but I don’t have to wait. I want to marry you. I’m the Lord of UnderBarrow, and I want you to be my queen and rule over the Barrow with me.”
I stared at him. We had a quiet sort of love—but it ran deep and passionate. There were few arguments, and when there were, we resolved them and moved on. Tam wasn’t mired in angst, or uncertainty, and he was the most secure man I had ever met. When we came together, I had been totally taken unaware, but we quickly found our niche, and from the start, it had felt so right that I couldn’t understand why it hadn’t happened sooner, except for the fact that I had been carrying a torch for Jason at the time.
“Will your people accept me?”
He shrugged. “Those who will, already do. Those who won’t, can find another place to live. The Bonny Fae have long sought wives and husbands outside of our race to keep from inbreeding. While I am not half-human, or any other mix, many of our people are. The Fae side breeds true in the blood. You are not an anomaly, though I doubt we have had any Theosians join the Barrow.”
That was true enough. And I had encountered very little ill will in the months Tam and I had been together. I searched my heart, wanting to make certain I had no doubts or regrets, but then I realized—I didn’t need to. My only concern was in getting Hecate’s approval. Technically, she could stop me from doing anything, and I owed her my allegiance first. My thoughts must have shown on my face, because Tam lifted my hands and pressed them against his heart.
“I know you have to get Hecate’s permission. I understand that you will always and forever be bound to her first. She has your loyalty and devotion. I simply want your heart.” The sincerity in his voice reverberated through the room.
“As long as Hecate gives her approval, I will be your wife. I will live with you in UnderBarrow and join your people.” And as I spoke, the realization that I was pledging myself to this man who was so alien and yet so familiar broke through my reserve and I broke out laughing. For a moment, I shoved aside all thoughts of Aboms and duty and the Order of the Black Mist and simply reveled in the knowledge that Tam loved me, and that I loved him.
EVERYBODY MANAGED TO make the meeting. I pulled Hecate aside before we began. She had brought Freya, Thor, and Athena with her. Thor had also dug up Heimdall from somewhere. The god was tall and fair-haired and looked too yummy to be real.
We stepped out of the council room and I fidgeted a bit. We had been spending a lot of time together since my training intensified, but I had no idea how she was going to respond.
“What’s going on? Are you all right?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. I just have something to ask you.” I didn’t realize how nervous I had been that she might say “No.” But my heart started to pound, and my knees were shaking as I shifted from one foot to the other.
“For heaven’s sake, just spit it out. Something’s obviously bothering you.” Her eyes narrowed, and a concerned look washed across her face.
“Tam…he asked me…we want to…” I froze.
“Did he ask you to marry him?”
That broke me free. “Yes, he wants to marry me. I would like your permission. I love him, Hecate. I’ve never felt the way about anyone the way I do about him. I thought I was in love with Jason for years, but this is love. Jason, he was an infatuation.”
For a moment I thought she wasn’t going to respond but then she broke into a wide smile and leaned down to kiss my forehead. “You have my blessing as long as you remember: your oath always comes to me first. But I will do my best not to let it interfere with your life with him. You’ll still be fighting Abominations, and you’ll still be training with me, you understand?”
“Of course. I wouldn’t want it any other way. Though I wouldn’t mind if the Aboms went back to where they came from willingly. But I’m used to being active. I wouldn’t make a very good lady who only sits on her throne and never does anything.” And then the realization that she had given us her blessing hit me and I hugged myself, smiling uncontrollably. “Even though we’re facing some stiff odds, I’m so happy right now.”
“As you should be, Fury. You have to learn to take celebration where you can find it. If you don’t, life would be pretty sour indeed. Now come, let’s get to the meeting.” She opened the door and stood back, waiting for me to enter.
I ran over to Tam and whispered, “She said yes.”
He glanced at Hecate, who winked at him, and then grabbed me around the waist, pulling me snug to his side before quickly letting go.
As we gathered around the table, Tam stood, motioning for silence. “First, before any grave discussions, Fury and I have an announcement to make.” He gestured for me to stand. As I did, he took my hand. “We want to announce that we’re getting married. Fury will be my queen. Please say nothing outside of this room until we make the official announcement. Damh Varias, you will see to that, please. Don’t wait—notify the people today.”
Everybody in the room applauded. I looked over at Jason and he gave me a soft smile, and I knew that our relationship had just shifted from guardian and ward to one on equal footing.
As the chatter died down, Jason stood. “I hope we don’t seem like we’re upstaging you, but Elan and I also have an announcement. We were going to tell you yesterday but it got lost in the fray. But we need to say something now because Elan’s duties need to be cut short. You see, she’s pregnant. I’m the father.”
I almost choked on the muffin I had just bitten into. “A baby?”
They beamed. However, given how traditional the hawk-shifters could be, I was surprised they hadn’t announced an engagement while they were at it.
“Congratulations,” Tam said. “Elan, I order you to immediately stand down from your duties as my bodyguard. We’ll find something safer for you to do here while you’re with child. Damh, get on that as well. For now, sit in on the meetings, but you won’t be going out to help on anything more laborious than a berry-picking expedition.”
Elan started to protest, but stopped as he held up his hand. “Now, with two happy announcements out of the way, we should move on to the reason for the meeting. Last night, Fury took down an Abomination that was heading for the village. Fury, I turn it over to you.”
I outlined everything that had happened, and when I was done, the room was silent.
“I have to go back to Seattle, to the World Tree. Lyon’s looking for the gate. I have to find it before he does.”
“We can’t go in until we figure out exactly what we’re doing. Also, remember that since UnderBarrow moved, there won’t be any secret entrances like there were before—not from here.” Tam waved his hands at the others. “We need ideas. Don’t be shy. We need to brainstorm.”
“With the Devani aligning forces with the Order of the Black Mist, isn’t this pretty much a suicide run? They’ll be watching the World Tree.” Tyrell didn’t look that impressed. He was a Theosian, bound to Dagda, the father of the Tuatha de Dannan.
“We can’t very well let that stop us. The world won’t be worth living in if they break open that gate,” I said. “Do you realize what happens if they find it?”
“Of course I do,” he said, sounding grumpy. “What I mean is—can’t we go in from another country? Isn’t there any way to contact Bifrost and have them send out someone there? They have World Trees over there, too, and if destroying a gate on one takes care of all of them, then why not leave this to somebody with more chance of getting through?” Tyrell was a good guy, but we had discovered, over the past few months, that he tended to get blustery when he thought that he was right. And not just blustery—downright belligerent at times.
I decided to nip the argument in the bud. “No, we can’t. The World Tree in Seattle is the mother tree—it’s the original. The portals can only be closed down on a worldwide basis from there. Not from any other tree.”
“So where is the gate on the tree?” Tyrell stared at me.
I shook my head. “I can’t tell you. I won’t be able to pinpoint it until I’m on the tree itself.”
He shrugged. “Do you have a plan yet?”
I shook my head. “Nope. Obviously, we need to do something before Lyon finds the portal and opens it. There’s no way of knowing when that will be, so the sooner the better.” I turned to Heimdall. “What did Gaia mean about seeking you out? And what’s Gjallarhorn?”
The Elder God looked a little unsettled. I had a feeling he wasn’t used to hanging out with the non-divine brigade. But after a quick, whispered consult with Thor, the stately Norse god answered. “Gjallarhorn is the Horn Resounding. Its sound can crumble any wall, destroy any edifice. But it can only be used when it agrees to be used. However, with a little of its power, I can fashion you a magical explosive to implode the portal and permanently close it.”
My eyes must have brightened because he held up his hand.
“Be aware, there are numerous dangers. You cannot set it off from this side of the gate. Someone will need to cross through the vortex and set the explosives there. They’ll have only a short time to escape. So you see, if things go right, it’s not a problem. If things go wrong…”
I nodded, seeing what he meant. “If things go wrong, it’s a suicide mission. How long will it take you to make this? And I suppose I should first ask, are you willing to help us?”
At that, Heimdall laughed. “Oh, ye of the fiery crown. I will help you, yes. As to how long it will take me to make the explosive? One month. So you’d better pray your enemy doesn’t find the portal before then, because there’s no way of hurrying up the process.”
“Then I guess we don’t have to make our plan in a hurry.” And with that, the meeting ended and everyone gathered around Tam and me, and Elan and Jason, to wish us all the best.
ELAN WALKED ME back to my room. Tam had given Damh Varias instructions to call a special session of the Court so that we could announce our wedding plans. We didn’t even have a date, but he wanted people to get used to the idea.
“So, big day for both of us,” I finally said as we neared the door to my room. I wasn’t sure just how much she would want to talk, but I wanted to give her the option.
She paused, then asked, “May I come in?”
I invited her in. Patrice was there, sorting through my clothes, and I asked her to bring us tea. She curtseyed and left.
“So.” I motioned for Elan to take a seat at the table. “A baby?”
“Yeah. We were surprised, too. I thought the cycle drugs I was taking worked, but apparently, only with men from my own people.” She blushed. “I wouldn’t have chosen this route so early, but Jason and I talked about it and decided that we want to make a go of it. And we want to give this child a chance to grow up. I thought about the options and while, with a stranger I probably wouldn’t choose this route, Jason…” She paused.
By now, I knew just how reserved the Woodland Fae could be. “You love Jason.”
Elan blinked. “I suppose I do. And I think he loves me. We have similar backgrounds, even though he’s a hawk-shifter. Our people are much alike.” She paused for a moment, searching my face. “Fury, how do you feel about this? I know it may not have been his story to tell, but in a way it was. He told me about your mother. How he and she…”
I let out a long breath. “Let’s not play games, Elan. I consider you a good friend, and so is Jason, though I admit our friendship almost broke over that. I still believe he should have told me early on. I spent a long time crushing on him and I felt like a fool. But in the long run, it doesn’t matter. We never would have worked as a couple. Tam—Tam’s different from anybody I ever expected to fall in love with. We mesh in a way that I can’t explain. I knew him for most of my life and never once looked at him as a prospective lover. Husband. Partner. Whatever you choose to call it. But the first time he kissed me, it felt as natural as breathing. I fell into him, you might say. He surrounded me with his energy and I not only felt safe, but right at home.”
I stopped, frustrated. I felt like I was talking around the subject, trying to find the right words. “I love Tam in a way that I didn’t think I could love anybody. He has my heart.”
She brightened. “Then, you’re okay with Jason and me? And with me being pregnant?”
“I’m more than okay with it. I think you’ll be good for him. And maybe becoming a father will pull him out of that pit of angst he so regularly dives into. He gets into his head and forgets his heart at times. I think you and the baby may put a stop to that.” I smiled and reached out to take her hand. “You do realize that, because Jason brought me up and took care of me, we’ll be family. Maybe not by blood, but by spirit.”
The bright look blossomed to fill her face and I realized just how beautiful she was. The fair maiden with golden hair. She should be a princess in a fairytale. But instead, I was going to be the princess of the Fae Barrow. The world worked in strange and unusual ways.
“I like that.” She squeezed my hand. “I know that my people are reserved, but I just want to tell you that I appreciate your friendship, and I’m never going to take Jason away from you.” She bit her lip. “Do you think Shevron will approve?”
Shevron was Jason’s actual sister, and for the past six months she and her son Leonard had been living in Verdanya, Elan’s home city. Leonard was sixteen with anger management issues. Or rather, discipline issues. His father had been human, and the hawk-shifter blood hadn’t bred into him. He felt like he belonged nowhere—not among the Cast—the hawk-shifter clan—or among humans. It tore at his sense of identity, and he had been acting out. But we all were hoping that a year living and working with the Woodland Fae would straighten him out.
“I think she’ll be happy. I love Shevron. She was like a mother to me.”
“Good, because they’re coming to visit in a few days. We got word last night. We haven’t told them about the baby yet, but I’m hoping that she won’t be upset.” Elan paused. “I haven’t asked Jason about it, but what can I expect for my child among his people? Our people are insular, but I have the feeling that the hawk-shifters make us look like we have open arms.”
I sighed. This was a whole ‘nother ball of wax. “The Cast are a rigid people. I won’t pussyfoot around it. They weren’t thrilled when Jason took me in, to be honest. But because he didn’t attempt to bring me into the Cast, they didn’t say anything. I was Theosian and had my own path, so I never minded. But Leonard’s had a rough time. He was brought up to be part of the Cast, and yet he is no more hawk-shifter than I am. His father’s blood bred true. He feels lacking, constantly, and that’s where his behavior springs from. Jason and Shevron just don’t understand. He has all of the responsibilities of a Cast member, but none of the perks. And the other kids teased him horribly about it.”
I stopped, realizing I had just painted Jason and Shevron in a pretty unflattering light. But it was also the truth, and I wasn’t going to lie to Elan.
“I think you should do your best to impart your lineage to your baby. Never make him—or her—feel like the mixed blood makes them lacking. That way, your child will always have a sense of lineage and self that Leonard is lacking. You see, his father ran off when he was born. Shevron only had the Cast to back her, and they did. Make no mistake about that. But Leonard has never been fully accepted, even though they pay lip service to him.”
As I finished, I sat back and took a long breath. Jason would probably be pissed I had said so much. He was a stickler for the rules of the Cast. But Elan had a right to know what kind of culture he came from. I was surprised she hadn’t asked him already.
She was silent for a moment as Patrice returned with the tea. After pouring for us, she exited the room again, giving us privacy.
“Thank you for telling me. I know it seems odd that Jason and I haven’t discussed this, but we only realized that I was pregnant last week. And we’ve both been in shock.” She propped her elbow on the table and leaned her chin on her hand.
“Are you going to get married?” I was beginning to get the feeling that Jason and Elan were in over their heads.
“I don’t know. I love Jason and I know he loves me, but…it’s such a big step.” She glanced over at me. “I envy you. I can hear the surety in your voice when you talk about Tam. You belong together and it’s obvious from watching you. But I don’t know if Jason and I are meant for the long run. We want to give it a try, but neither one of us has even mentioned marriage yet. And I don’t want to marry unless we’re sure.”
“That’s probably a good idea.” I thought for a moment, trying to figure out the best approach to what I was about to say. “Maybe your first decision should be how the child will be raised—as hawk-shifter or Fae. But I suppose that depends on whose lineage breeds through.”
Most of those with intermixed heritages followed either the mother or the father. A few would have traits from both, but usually, one lineage dominated.
“Whatever the case, I’m grateful for your support. You set my mind at ease, at least about you and Jason. As to everything else, I’m just not sure.” Her voice trembled and I realized that the usually stalwart Elan was actually frightened.
I swept around the table and wrapped my arms around her shoulders. Her people might be reserved, but she needed a hug.
“It will be all right,” I whispered. “You’ll have a lovely child, and you and Jason will make wonderful parents.”
And that seemed to be just the thing Elan needed to hear.