THE LAUGHTER THAT left my body was fake. Masked by happiness when really my chest was filled with so much hate, it squeezed and tugged at my soul. The vile men who threatened to destroy our small town would die. I would make sure of it. This anger was fueled by the fucked-up world we lived in.
When Angel and I had walked into the clubhouse, that angry darkness inside of me grew when I saw Meeka sitting at a booth by herself. Something unleashed inside of me back when Vega had kidnapped me. Maybe it had been there all along.
Everything in me told me to go to Meeka. To scream and yell, demand to know why she did what she did. I knew. Her words repeated over and over again in mind.
“I had to.”
She kept my sister from me and used me as bait. The anger tore at my soul, threatening to consume me.
“It’s over and done with, Jay,” Angel whispered in my ear. “Let it go.”
I bit back a scoff. He meant well but right then, I didn’t want to let it go. It wasn’t possible. And this hate I felt only made me stronger. It would help me battle the impending war whenever Charles Brian decided to show himself again.
Asher Donovan had been the other part of that whole operation. Angel’s brother. A man he had gone to hell and back with. It destroyed a piece of him. He had only just begun to learn how to love, how to open himself up to these new feelings, and then he found out his brother had been keeping this secret the whole time.
“Hi, Meeka,” I blurted.
Her eyes snapped up from her phone. “Hi,” she muttered. She moved to get up from the booth but hesitated.
“We have a meeting at five,” I told her. “But you and I are meeting beforehand.”
She nodded. “Okay.”
“Good girl,” Angel mumbled in my ear. “It’s about time you retract those claws of yours.”
“Fuck off, Angel.”
He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and kissed me fully on the mouth. “So much fucking sass.”
I breathed him in. Every sense of him. His taste washed over me, making my heart skip several beats before I had to come up for air. One kiss and I was done. A second kiss and I would be falling to my knees at his feet, begging like a bitch in heat.
“It makes me hard knowing my kiss turns you on to the point of no control,” he purred, kissing my neck.
I shivered, grabbing his hand, and led him to my room at the back of the club. I needed him to show me I could feel something besides this dread and worry.
“Jay,” he ground out, closing the door behind him.
I turned toward him, stripping out of my clothes. “I need you to fuck me.” Sex wasn’t an out. It wasn’t an excuse to ignore our problems but right then, it was all I wanted.
“Kneel.” Angel came toward me, unbuckling his belt. “I’m going to fuck that pretty mouth of yours for being so demanding.”
I lowered to the floor, tilting my head back. I waited. For him. For that control I had but didn’t want.
For the next hour or so, Angel unleashed something inside of me. He took control, dominated my body, and stole my heart. I loved him. Every inch of him. But that nagging feeling of whether he would hurt me or not kept poking me.
“No man will ever love you the way I do,” Tyler said, his deep voice whispering across my skin. “And you will never open up again. You are mine forever, Jenny, whether you like it or not.”
He was right. With his bruises on my flesh, scars on my heart, and his body inside of mine, the only choice I had was to submit. There was no other way. No out. I was trapped like a rat in a cage. Clawing and scratching until my fingers bled.
The vile man fucking me forced me to look at him. The names he called me.
Slut. Whore. Bitch. Slave.
He loved me.
My mind played tricks on me. Falling in and out of the darkness that I begged to consume me.
A hard slap landed against my cheek.
The sting should have brought tears to my eyes. The burning sensation of where his palm hit should have caused me to cry out. But it didn’t. It had come to this, hadn’t it? He hit. I submitted. He forced me to do things I never would have thought possible. And after a while, I found myself craving them. Him. Tyler Bone.
“I love you, princess,” Angel’s words whispered across my skin, followed by his hand sliding down my side to my hip. “I will show you. With every breath, every inch, every ounce of me that I love you.”
I floated in and out of sleep, listening to his words. Holding onto them like they were the life line I needed to make it through each day.
Memories of Tyler and our dangerous relationship repeated themselves every time I closed my eyes. I thought I loved him, but Angel showed me what true love was.
Our love had been strong, growing intense as each day passed. With him lying beside me, his deep breathing evening out as his peaceful dreams took over, I couldn’t help but wonder if this was real. If it was just a dream. With a click of my heels, this fantasy would end, and I would be forced to go back to a time where abuse was all I knew.
“Whatever happens, I am here,” Angel told me while we were lying in each other’s arms.
“I don’t want anything to happen,” I mumbled, curling into him, grazing my hand down his bare chest.
“I know, baby.” He kissed my temple, letting his lips linger when his phone rang. He answered it, and I zoned out.
All this time, I thought Vega had destroyed that tiny bit of strength left that I had. But I realized that it had been Tyler all along. He promised me that I would never find love again with another man. I did, but the fear of Angel hurting me burned its way into my heart. It was what Tyler wanted.
“I’m with Jay,” Angel told the caller.
At the mention of my name, I looked his way.
He pinched the bridge of his nose which I had come to know was his signature move whenever he was stressed. “We need her in, Asher.”
Meeka. My stomach twisted.
“Well, of course she’s not going to agree easily.” Angel sat up straighter. “It’s not like you’re giving her a choice … I told you to get someone you trust. I assumed it would be her but do not blame this shit on me. Fine … I know … I love you too, brother.” Angel threw the phone on the end table.
“What the hell’s going on?” I asked, a sliver of annoyance rushing through my body.
Angel cupped my nape, capturing my mouth in a hard bruising kiss before leaning his forehead against mine. “I can’t tell you everything yet.”
“It’s work related,” I finished for him. “But why does it have to do with Meeka?”
“I’ll explain when I can.” Or when he would have no choice went unsaid. “Please trust me.” He kissed my nose.
I pushed out of his embrace. “Of course I trust you, but I’m fucking sick of these secrets. Tell me what’s going on.”
“I can’t. You know that.”
“Fine. Don’t tell me,” I grumbled. “See if I fucking care.”
“What the hell is this, Jay?” He frowned. “You know I can’t tell you anything when it comes to my fucking job.”
“I know that,” I snapped. “But these girls are my sisters. When it comes to them, you have to tell me.”
“No, I don’t.”
“Why the hell not?” I threw back at him. “What does Meeka have to do with this?” Not that I overly cared but if what she was involved in effected my other sisters, I would throw her to the wolves and leave her there to rot.
“You need to trust me,” he repeated, shoving a hand roughly through his hair.
“And you need to tell me what is going on.”
He reached for me, grabbing my hand, and pulled me against him.
“Angel,” I attempted to push out of his grip. “Talk to me.”
“Asher is needing Meeka’s help. That’s all I can say for now.” Angel ran his hands down my back. “What are you doing before the meeting today?”
“Stop trying to change the subject,” I mumbled.
He chuckled, kissing my forehead.
“I hate you right now.”
“No, you don’t.”
He was right. I didn’t. But he sure as fuck pissed me the hell off. “I need to hit the shop,” I said, finally answering his question. “I have a couple interviews to set up at some point as well.” Tattooed had been my dream. It was a new business, with me being the only tattoo artist until now. Creena Chan, King’s Harlots newest prospect, kept things in order for me and did what she could. Business was booming for both of us but I needed someone to man the cash and make sure Tattooed didn’t go under.
“Dale said he was working on the new sign for you.” Angel rose from the bed and pulled on his jeans.
“Yeah, but he doesn’t listen well. I told him I wanted classy but bold. He tried showing me flashing signs and wanted to add sparklers at one point.”
Angel laughed. “That’s my brother.”
I smiled, getting dressed as well. “He means well, I guess.”
“I’m glad you’re getting along with them.” Angel closed the distance between us and grabbed both of my hands. “It means everything to me that they accept you and take you in. If something happened to me, I need to know that you’re protected.”
“Nothing is going to happen to you. To either of us. No one is getting fucking taken again.” I pulled out of his grip and shoved my top over my head. “No one.”
***
(Angel)
“No one.”
Jay’s words. Desperate and driven by fear and hate.
My chest panged that I couldn’t take that away from her. My soul cried out with the need to make her feel better. Even for just a little bit. I poured those pleas to help her into our love making. I tried so hard with everything in me to let her feel my love for her. I didn’t say it enough. She inspired me. She was a powerful woman in a fucked-up man’s world but she didn’t give up. She made it so other women wanted to follow suit.
“I don’t want to go to this meeting,” Jay muttered a couple hours later. It was supposed to have been at the club, but Asher had asked for us to show up at his place. So we were all on our way, much to my fiancé’s disapproval.
“I know you and Meeka need to work through your shit, but we all need to be together on this,” I told her, kissing her knuckles before letting them drop in her lap. “I need you in on this with me.”
“Why do I have to go? I deal with this shit much better at the club.”
That sentence bothered me. She didn’t say it was her club, and it hadn’t been the first time. “Jay.”
She sighed, her shoulders slumping but she wouldn’t meet my gaze.
“Jay,” I repeated, my voice firm.
She huffed but finally looked my way.
Vega messed with her head. And it destroyed me more than her. When she was taken, I lost a part of myself. We both did. Somehow, she came out stronger in the end, and I was the one who became weak.
I pulled her into my arms, cradling her head against my chest.
Her back stiffened.
Holding her at arm’s length, I searched her face.
When she raised an eyebrow, the hint of emotion that was there seconds before disappeared when the darkness took over.
Jay pushed out of my hold.
Giving her the space she needed, I stood back and watched her. But it would be over my dead body before I ever let her deal with this shit on her own.