Kaitlin sat at her mother’s house, wishing with all her might that her mom would walk in right at that moment and give her a hug.

She’d been sitting on the couch with a half-eaten, self-bought box of chocolates trying to convince herself it was time to leave. What was she staying for, anyway? She’d gotten the clothes she’d left behind, and had gone through her mother’s mail. Cheri had already agreed to keep stopping in every few days for the plants.

There was literally nothing left keeping her there now. Except the thought of spending Christmas all alone.

Except Mike.

She plucked another chocolate from the box and jammed it into her mouth.

Sure, maybe she’d fooled herself into believing she hadn’t wanted to see him again, but when she’d looked over to see the house locked up tight, no car or bike in the driveway, her heart had sank.

She chewed the candy in her mouth, but it tasted like sawdust.

Mike wasn't here now and he likely wasn't coming back.

So much for Honey's house and sentiment. Apparently Michael Blade couldn't stick in anywhere.

Kaitlin stood and grabbed her overnight bag full of forgotten clothes, peering around the house one last time. If she forgot anything else, she'd just have to live without it. She couldn’t come back until Honey’s house was sold for fear of seeing Mike roll up on his bike one day with another woman on the back.

The thought made her gut lurched and she swallowed the lump in her throat.

“Hasta la vista,” she muttered.

Then, she made her way to the door and swung it open, letting out a screech as she walked face first into a massive, hard body.

"Jesus!" she yelped, dropping the bag onto the tile floor and reaching for the nearest thing to break her fall. Turned out the nearest thing was Michael Blade’s strong arms, and her whole world spun.

"Sorry, I didn't meant to scare you," he murmured, tightening his grip on her shoulders and steadying her until she could stand on her own two feet.

Her heart was beating faster than a runaway freight train and her thoughts were moving just as fast.

"It's okay, I just--" She swallowed hard, trying to think of what to say that wouldn't make her seem like a sad sack mooning over him. "I had to come and pick up a few things. I'm really sorry I couldn't finish the job at Honey's. I saw the progress and it looks like Luis is doing a great job," she said, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear as she took a giant step back.

Real subtle. She was rambling like a lunatic and had all but jumped to get away from his touch.

If she was going to play it cool, she was going to have to scale down her reactions to him. Already, her hands were shaking and the familiar scent of his skin was making her teary-eyed.

Strange that they'd been together for such a short time as more than friends, but he felt like a part of her. She missed him.

And now here he was. Just a touch away.

"Luis is doing a great job. I've been staying at my apartment, but I came by yesterday and was really impressed. Thanks for setting it up."

She cleared her throat and forced a smile, trying not to look into his beautiful eyes for fear of getting lost all over again.

"Least I could do." But the forced smile was already breaking, and unless she wanted to humiliate herself by sobbing into his t-shirt, she needed to get away, pronto. "I was just on my way out, so unless there was something you needed?"

He leveled her with his dark gaze and took a step forward. "Actually, there was something I needed. Can I come in for a minute?"

Unable to find her voice to respond, she just nodded and waved him in.

She could do this. She had to do this. He hadn't done anything wrong, after all. She'd misread the signals and fooled herself into thinking that she could change that leopard's spots. She couldn't fault him for being a leopard.

"I wanted to tell you a little story, if you're willing to listen," he said, crossing the room and lowering himself onto a chair before gesturing her to join him.

"Yeah, okay."

Here it came. The pity-filled apology where he told her how much he liked her, and how it wasn't her, it was him. Maybe it would be exactly the thing to set this all right, though. Maybe it would make her mad enough to put him where he belonged.

In the past.

So she sat, and folded her trembling hands in her lap.

His face was solemn, his eyes sincere as he began. "You know my mom left when we were ten."

"Yes, of course. It wasn't a secret."

"Did you know that that she never told us she was leaving? She told us we were going to Honey's for a visit, like always, and then she never came back. For the first week, we waited. I remember thinking I hoped she didn't come back this time, because life with Honey was so much more stable. So much better. But you know what? You don't realize how much a kid needs him mom until she's not there and how much it affects you when she doesn't come back."

Kaitlin's heart gave a squeeze and it took everything she had not to lean forward and smooth the crease in his brow. They'd talked a little about this in the past, but it was definitely a subject he preferred not to discuss. No matter how hurt she was, she hated to see him so much pain.

"It fucked me up, good. I think I lost it a little. Wondering what I'd done to make her go. Why me and Rick weren't enough to make her stay. What was more important or better than us that deserved her undivided attention?"

He let out a bitter laugh and the gaze that had been locked on hers went out of focus as he got lost in memories only he could see.

"I remember thinking it was just easier to not care. Not about anyone or anything. So I acted like a jerk. Threw up walls between myself and the rest of the world. Even Honey, who, god bless her heart, didn't deserve it. But that whole time, I was lost. See, I was protecting myself against hurt but those same walls were insulating me from every really loving anyone."

He leaned forward in his seat, his eyes going clear now as he reached for her hand.

"Like the way I used to tease you when we were kids, and even more after the night you kissed me on your graduation night. It was the only way I could keep you at arm's length, because if I let you get closer, I knew I was a goner."

She heard the words, but couldn't quite comprehend them. So what was he telling her? That he'd finally let his guard down for her and she'd blown it by walking away when he’d begged her to wait? 

Her stomach cramped and she shook her head. Had she lost him before she’d even known she had him? "I didn't know. I didn't realize."

"That's why I'm telling you now. I was so angry when you left that night with nothing but that damned note. I was cursing myself up and down for letting you in only to get burned so badly. It took a talk with a friend to make me realize that you had fears and doubts yourself. You had trust issues too. And I had walked out of the house to meet Ashley without even considering how what I was doing would reinforce those. I'm so sorry for that. And I want to tell you what happened now."

As she stared into his weary face, it hit her in a rush. She didn't care what had happened that night. Right or wrong, good or bad, she wanted to believe in him. 

How had that happened? He was a player. A bad boy to the core. But he's never lied to you. Why would he start now?

"I don't need to know." She gave his hand a squeeze and say back, suddenly feeling freer than she'd ever felt before. "It doesn't matter."

His jaw clenched as he turned away, looking like she'd slapped him. "I understand. I just...I had to try." His throat worked as he pushed himself to his feet. "If you ever change your mind--"

Her eyes widened and she shot to her feet and closed the distance between them.

"Change my mind? You've got me all wrong, Mikey. I don't want to know because you’ve never hurt me before. If you say there’s nothing between you and Ashley, I believe you. And, if you want to be with me, I would do everything in my power to never let you down or hurt you again."

She wondered if he could hear the wild beat of her heart because she was almost deaf with it. 

"What do you say, Mike? Can we give this another try and see if we can learn to trust together?"

He let out a growl and yanked her toward him. Tears sprang to her eyes, and this time, she let them fall freely. 

"Hell, yes." He slanted his mouth over hers, kissing her with all the pent up need of the past days. They stayed glued together for another minute, before he reluctantly pulled away.

"I'm glad you decided to forgive me," he murmured, with a half smile. "It will make this part whole lot less awkward. I, uh, got myself a little Christmas present.”

He lifted up his shirt and there, emblazoned across his chest, was some fresh ink.

She dipped her head closer first, to see the tattoo she’d seen the night they spent together. Just a simple word on his rib cage, beneath his heart.

Honey.

And now, above it, right over his heart, the face of a gorgeous calico feline, with sapphire-colored eyes.

It took a second, but when it sunk in, the tears turned to sobbing peals of laughter and joy.

"Oh my god! Big, tough, Michael Blade. With a kitty tattoo."

A thousand watt grin lit up his face as he dragged her closer.

“Damn straight. Because you’re a part of me, Kitty. And I’m not letting go.”

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