Chapter 12

Riley

I grabbed the pillow at the head of my bed and dragged it toward my chest, clutched it tight and wiggled my ass at Jax behind me.

When we were like this, him touching me, his flavor on my tongue, I lost control. I lost the will to worry. It didn’t matter whether that was a good or a bad thing. It was the truth.

“Hold still,” Jax said and took hold of both of my ass cheeks.

I did as I was told but reluctantly. I was empty, and I had to be filled before I lost my mind. Maybe I already had.

His fingers bit into the meat of my ass and I bit my lip. “Please,” I managed.

“Please what?”

“I need you inside me.”

“Not yet,” Jax replied.

“Huh?” I shifted, but he stopped me with a light spank on the ass.

“Don’t fucking move until I say so. Until you’re dripping with your own cum, Riley. Understand?”

“Yes,” I whispered, careful not to move my head, not to do anything that would end the moment prematurely.

Silence.

The gentle stroke of his tongue from my hole downward to my clit brought a gasp from my lips. I barely managed not to lurch forward. I hugged the pillow tighter, my breasts pressing into it. “More,” I whispered.

He nipped my clit.

“Please. I want more.”

Jax dragged his tongued back up to my entrance and inserted it, pumped it back and forth inside me, tugging my ass cheeks apart as far as they could go. He buried his face in there, ate noisily. The wet, slurping noises were unbearable.

I writhed and his hand came down on my ass cheek again.

“What’d I say?” he asked against my pussy lips. He sucked one into his mouth, licked it, then did the same with the other. “What’d I say, Riley?”

“Don’t move,” I replied.

“Exactly.” He massaged the stinging flesh then returned his attention to my clit. He suckled on it and released one of my cheeks, inserted two fingers and worked them inside me, extra slow.

“Yes,” I hissed. “Oh my god, yes. It’s so good. It’s so fucking good. I love it slow and deep.” His fingers were huge. They hit me exactly where I needed him, and he turned the pads upward, seeking the soft spot inside me that filled me and drove me through the roof.

I jerked again, and he quit suckling on my clit. “Move again and I’m going to stick a finger in your ass. You done that before, Riley?”

“Uh-uh,” I said. And I wanted it. I wanted everything with him, no matter how weird and kinky.

“Then you probably shouldn’t move.” He gave me another languorous lick, moving his fingers painfully slow.

I bucked my hips, purposefully this time.

Jax let out a little grunt of pleasure and nipped my clit. “You asked for it,” he said, and shifted his left hand from my clit. A pause of cold air, the wet sound of him spitting, working his fingers together, and then heat against my asshole.

His lips returned to my pussy, his tongue swirled and teased, fingers pressed into my G-spot, and then…

“Oh my god,” I cried out.

His finger, so thick and long and wet, entered my ass slowly. The pressure of him inside me, in both holes, while his tongue toyed with my bud, sent me screaming into my orgasm.

I shuddered against his lips, clenched around his fingers, bit down on the pillow, my teeth tearing into the fabric, my eyes screwed shut. Muffled shrieks and his cologne drifting through the guest room—I’d never forget this.

The climax receded slowly, the aftershocks bringing thrills of pleasure. I gasped and shifted, his fingers still inside me.

“Good,” Jax said. “That was damn good, girl. You’re so fucking delicious I nearly came.”

“Fuck me,” I replied, around a mouthful of pillow. I spat it out and looked back over my shoulder at him. He stood behind me now and smoothed his hands over my lower back, pressing into the muscles on either side of my spine. I circled my hips, jiggled my hands at him. “Fuck me, please.”

“Condoms are in my room,” he replied.

I groaned. His room was right next door and forever away. I needed him now. Right fucking now.

“Wait, shit, I have one in my wallet.” His pants were still on, just his thick cock out, still glistening from his fluids and my spit. He dragged a leather wallet out of his pocket and fumbled around in it. He brought out a battered looking condom packet and grimaced. “It’s old.”

“So?”

“Just an observation.”

“It could be prehistoric and made of fish bladder and I wouldn’t care right now,” I replied, wriggling again.

“That’s the sexiest thing you’ve ever said.” Jax smirked and tore the condom package open with his teeth. He slipped the sheath over his dick, then pressed his palm to my ass, just above my entrance, and dragged his dick through my lips.

I shuddered and pressed myself backward. “Yes.”

“Yes, what?”

“I want it. I want it all. Every inch.”

“Better,” he said, and inserted the tip.

It was as if we’d never done it before. My pussy was so ready for him, yet his cock was so big it felt like it wouldn’t fit. Jax pressed into me, growling under his breath.

I moaned for him and pressed the side of my face into the pillow, rolled my eyes to the side, caught a glimpse of him moving, the strong chest, exposed, the ripple of his pecs beneath cotton, and the fire in his gaze, locked on me, switching between my pussy and my face.

“Jesus, I’m close already.”

“Good,” I whispered. “I want to feel you come.”

“Say that again.”

“I want to feel you come. I wish you could fill me.” Where the hell did that come from?

Jax grunted and pounded into me, his breaths hard and fast, gusting over my skin, his hands everywhere, one reaching around, playing with me again.

I streaked toward my second orgasm and broke over the crest.

He came with me, his dick pulsing against my walls, too hard for me to handle. One, two, three, four, five thrusts—the condom had to be filled to the brim with him.

Jax groaned and collapsed forward. He rolled onto his side, still buried within me, and tucked my close to his chest. He kissed the back of my neck and nuzzled that slightly crooked nose into my hair. “So good,” he said.

“Better than that,” I replied.

His arms were a safety net, not too tight though, one lying on the bed, the other looped over my side, up and around, his hand nestled between my breasts on top of my tee.

This is perfect. It’s wrong, but it’s so perfect.

In the years I’d been with Michael, not once had we had a moment like this, where reality fell away and it was just the two of us, spooning, dropping off into a pleasure-coma together. With my ex, it’d been wham, bam, and not a thank you after.

I forced thoughts of him out of my head.

“You smell like lavender,” Jax muttered. “My mom used to pick lavender from the garden before she died.”

A fist clenched around my heart.

Jax’s breathing evened out, slowed. A short, sharp snore followed, then more deep breaths. God, even in sleep he was sexy. And strong. Who knew snoring could be a turn on?

I listened to him, the only light from my bedside lamp, and tried for calm. It was futile. The doubts had already started creeping in.

I’d slept with Jax again. He’d said things to me tonight that were…what were they? I had no idea, but I wanted to find out what he’d meant, and that scared me more than the fact that I was tucked against his broad chest, his cock still inside me, even though it was soft.

I had to talk to someone about this.

My sister was totally out of the question. She would immediately report my “extracurricular” activities to my parents, and they already despised my lifestyle choices, as they called them. Apparently, teaching pole dancing was just as good as stripping.

Veronica was the only one I could talk to, but she’d have a cow, six pigs, and a flock of birds the minute I told her what’d happened between me and the handsome, billionaire stranger, as she called him.

It didn’t matter. I had to talk. I’d kept so much of everything inside that writing in my journal barely helped anymore.

I lifted Jax’s hand carefully and shimmied out of his grip. I got up, slipped on my cotton pj shorts, grabbed my cell from the bedside table, then clicked off the light. I stood in the darkness for a second, let my eyes adjust.

His silhouette appeared on the bed. The shape of him, laid out there, so quiet for once, apart from the occasional snort, heated me inside.

I’m not falling for him. I can’t be. It’s just a crush.

Ugh, I couldn’t bullshit my way out of this. I tiptoed to the door, opened it, and let myself out into the hall. I hurried toward the living room, then took a seat in one of the cushy leather armchairs facing the door, in case Jax woke up and traipsed in.

Finally, I dialed Ronny’s number.

“Well, hello there,” Veronica answered. “Fancy hearing from you.”

“What?”

“Uh, nothing, just that you’re usually texting me at this time of night,” my bestie replied. “Any reason you’re so quiet lately? Hmmm? This wouldn’t have anything to do with the devilishly handsome billionaire man you just happen to be rooming with.”

“Hey, you didn’t text me either,” I said, and grabbed one of the cushions on the sofa nearest me. I hugged it to my abdomen.

“I was playing hard to get,” Veronica said. “I assume you’ve been doing the same with Mr. Handsome—”

“Ron!”

“What? It’s not like Jax is a real name anyways,” she replied. “It sounds like a detergent or something. Ha! Like Ajax. Remember? From the Deadpool movie?”

My mind hopped around from topic to topic as she prattled on. “Wait,” I said.

“So, how is Ajax? Doing well? Still cooking you dinners? Still—”

“We fucked.” It came out crass—unnecessarily so, but hey, that was my brain under pressure.

The resultant silence on the other end of the line could’ve deafened an airport ground staff worker. And those guys listened to jet engines all day long.

“Ron?”

“No.”

“What?”

“No ‘Ron.’ You’ll address me as ‘I told you so’ until further notice,” she replied, humor sneaking into her voice. “Seriously though, what was it like?”

“Are you—I thought you’d freak out when I told you,” I said.

“I figured it was bound to happen eventually.”

“Why?”

“Because of how googly-eyed you go whenever you talk about going back to the apartment, or the lasagna you had, or the conversation over pizza.”

“I mentioned that?” I asked. God, I’d probably motormouthed it off at some point during the day.

“Mentioned it? He’s all you’ve been talking about for the past week. So yeah, kinda makes sense that you fucked the guy.”

“Ugh, don’t call it that.”

“You called it that,” she replied.

“I know, but I was nervous. That’s the only reason. We had sex,” I said and lowered my voice. “But that’s not the problem.”

“Then what is?”

“I think—Veronica, I’m feeling something for this guy, and it scares the living piss out of me,” I managed.

“Piss isn’t living,” she said. “While we’re hovering around the topic, I mean.”

“Well can we stay on the actual topic, here? You know that this type of thing is exactly what I don’t need. My plans—”

“Plans, plans, plans. You realize that’s all you ever talk about? I get it, sister, you want to be in control of all the variables that could mess you up, but that’s not life. Life is, oh, I don’t know, meeting some high-powered businessman and becoming his roommate. It’s chaos, and that’s OK. The more you plan, the less you’ll actually be able to control, because life’s just gonna be like, ‘pa-hah, fuck your plans, sucker,’ and mess it all up anyway.”

I scratched the back of my neck and worked that over in my mind. Yeah, I liked to plan because I was afraid of everything screwing up like it had with Michael. It was a healthy outlet for my fears, wasn’t it? It could’ve been way worse. At least I hadn’t collapsed after the break-up.

“You still there?” Veronica asked.

“Yeah.”

“OK, so you’re feeling something for this dude. The crazy dude who just invites women into his home, cooks them Italian, then insists on them staying for more than just the night.”

“I don’t want to define anything. I want to figure this out before it becomes a royal fuck-up.”

“OK,” Veronica said. “So, I know you always figure everything out on your own, and I’m just your sounding board right now, but I’d like to meet this guy in person. Way I see it, he’s either a catch or a scumbag, and I’ve got a nose for scum-sucking, whore-faced—”

“Easy!”

“Sorry, I was thinking about Michael. I called that one, didn’t I?”

“Yeah, you did,” I replied.

“And I didn’t even ask you to address me as ‘I told you so,’ because I’m a good friend.”

“So, what does that make you now?” I couldn’t help but smile. Ron always cleared my fears away. She was so strong. When her world had fallen apart, she’d leaned on me, but not for long. She’d pulled herself back on her feet so fast it’d stunned me.

“A genius,” she said. “Always right. The light in the darkness. I am the beacon of Gondor in Lord of the Rings.”

“There was more than one beacon.”

“Then I’m all of it. And you’re calling for aid. Like Gondor.”

“I’m a city? Listen, if this is your way of calling me fat—”

“Don’t make me reach through the phone and slap you.” Veronica chuckled, then sighed. “I’m serious, Riley. I want to meet this guy. Maybe, I can help you figure this out before you lose your mind.”

I nodded. I’d been there for her, and she’d be there for me. “It’s not my mind I’m worried about.”

“It’s not your virginity either.”

“Oh ho, rich coming from you, single momma.”

She snort-giggled. “See you in the morning?”

“Yeah. I’ll bring the coffee.”

“Bitch, you’ll bring me a croissant. I am the all-seeing, all-knowing—”

I hung up on her, chuckling. A text pinged through a second later.

“Love you,” she said.

“Me more,” I replied.

I’d sleep on this, figure it out in the morning when the light had cleared the night’s fears from my skin. I stood up, tiptoed back down the hall and into the guest room. Jax was still fast asleep on his side, snoring lightly.

It was easy to slip underneath his arm and snuggle close. Even better when he tucked me tight against his body in his sleep, muttering my name under his breath.