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Hopeless Heart by Rebecca King (10)

 

An hour later, Georgiana was making tea in the kitchen when knocking on the front door drew her attention. She refused to answer it because she had no intention of having another confrontation with Will right now. She was all alone in the house. Ruth was still taking tea with her friend. The last thing Georgiana needed right now was her world shaken any more.

“Go away,” she mumbled beneath her breath as she finished making tea and began to arrange everything on a tray.

Thankfully, after several minutes of pounding, silence settled over the house once more. Determined to sit in peace while she savoured her tea, she took a seat amidst the plant-infested conservatory and contemplated her current predicament.

She refused to spend her entire day hiding in the conservatory. She was going to have to face him but, hopefully, not until she had decided what to say to him to make him realise she wasn’t going back to her parent’s house with him.

That was why he was here; she had no doubt about that. He had no interest in how she was, or what she had been doing, or if she was happy and had everything she needed.

“He is here because of what he wants,” she sighed. “And it isn’t me as a person. It is me as a being that needs to be returned to its keepers.”

She was aware she was being harsh but, at that moment, was so frustrated with everything that she couldn’t help herself. If she thought the hurt she had endured in her father’s study had been bad, it was nothing when compared to the veritable smack in the face he had dealt her beneath the apple tree. His regret at having nearly kissed her again had been stamped all over his face. She had to wonder, if he found her so unappealing, why he had moved toward her in the first place. It was confusing. It was frustrating. It was something she would never get answers to until she discussed it with him, and that was something she would never do.

“I can’t outrun this,” she whispered.

She only had to think about him and her world turned turbulent. To have him before her drew forth all the feelings, doubts, and fears, her life in Cranbury had brought her. It was clear now that although she had physically moved, she hadn’t been able to outrun her emotions–she had carried them with her.

“It would help if I don’t have to see him anymore. At least then I can try to put him out of my mind for good,” she whispered morosely.

Strangely, niggling doubts began to churn that warned her she might never be able to do that.

 

Will stalked to the back of the house, a dark scowl on his face. She was in. He had watched that elderly gentleman escort her through the door only ten minutes ago. The almost proprietorial way the gentleman had hovered over her was deeply concerning, and something Will had not expected to see. The thought of a man sniffing around someone as kind and beautiful as Georgiana, especially someone so old, bothered him. But, it wasn’t as disturbing as the sight of the gentleman on the curricle fawning all over her. He was someone Will didn’t want anywhere near Georgiana, mainly because he had ‘rogue’ stamped all over him.

Frustrated at Georgiana’s stubbornness, Will lifted his hand to knock on the back door.

“Might I make a suggestion?” Henry Parker offered quietly from behind him.

Will spun on his heel and turned a glare on the elderly gentleman standing just a few feet away. He had been so lost in his thoughts that he hadn’t even realised he was no longer alone.

“Let me guess,” Will drawled sarcastically. “Leave her alone?”

Henry nodded. “I do believe that the lady has made it quite clear she has no wish to speak with you. You won’t get what you want if you pester her. She has decided to live here with her aunt. Go home, back to Cranbury, and live your life. Whatever duty you have to her family has been carried out to the best of your ability. If she doesn’t wish to comply with their demands, respect her decision.”

“I don’t see how this has anything to do with you,” Will protested, his anger burning at the set-down he had just received. He wanted to ask the man if he was aware who he was talking to but suspected that in an out of the way place like this he probably hadn’t ever heard of the Abrams family.

“I understand that you are no relation either so the same applies to you,” Henry replied sternly. “Whatever your connections are to the family, I understand it is to her brothers, not to her. It is highly inappropriate for you to come here and start to hound the woman. Why, one might believe that there is more behind your behaviour than mere concern for a friend.”

Henry allowed a thoughtful silence to settle for a moment to give the man time to consider that. He suspected from the lack of protest that he had given Will plenty to think about and didn’t push.

“Georgiana is as good as family to me,” Will said coldly.

“But she isn’t family, though, is she?” Henry replied. “You are no more related to her than I am. If her family cannot be bothered to come after her then you shouldn’t see fit to do so either. If you, or they, wish to keep her a part of your lives you should respect her wishes for now.”

Will opened his mouth to issue the man with a stern rebuke but closed it again with a snap when the elderly man turned around and casually sauntered away. He turned to glare accusingly at the house, a blistering curse hovering on his lips. For the first time in his life, he had been firmly set-down as though he was nothing more than a common criminal and it didn’t sit well with him at all. Not least because his conscience was niggling at him that the man had a point. Georgiana wasn’t a relation. If she chose to live somewhere other than her parent’s house then it was for her parents to take her to task over it, not him. He was merely there because-

He quickly turned his thoughts away from that. There were too many connotations there for him to consider right now. For his own peace of mind, he needed to make sure she was safe, which she was. After the kiss they had shared he had been unable to settle once he had realised she had left Cranbury. He had to see her again, just once more, just to make sure she was alright. Now that he had, he was struggling to find the willpower to turn around and leave again.

Continuing to knock would be futile, so Will slowly returned to the tavern where he had a room.

“Morning,” he murmured as he passed a woman walking along the path toward him.

Rather than call a cheery greeting in response like several other villagers had done, this woman frowned at him before she hurried past. Will watched her for a moment, but she didn’t acknowledge him. Instead, she quickened her stride to a half-run and raced away.

“I don’t believe the villagers like strangers,” he muttered, and resumed his journey.

His words returned to haunt him when he walked through the door of the tavern several minutes later. The dull hum of conversation within dimmed until only a few faint whispers broke the silence. The once affable inn keeper stared at him somewhat suspiciously. Will lifted one superior brow at him, silently daring the man to take him to task over something. When the tavern owner merely turned his back disinterestedly, Will realised something was going on in the village, and it concerned him. As he climbed the stairs, well aware of the rather hostile stares of several patrons boring into his back, he began to wonder if it had something to do with his altercation with Georgiana beneath the apple tree.

“Preposterous,” he muttered. How on earth could anybody have seen them? There was nobody around–well, except for the old man and he had been hovering around Georgiana. It didn’t make sense that the villagers had a problem with him because he had only just arrived, yet only an hour ago most of the people downstairs had been friendly.

Unable to make sense of it all, Will moseyed over to the window to study the street.

“The only reason why a village would turn against me is because someone is spreading nasty gossip about the new visitor in town,” Will murmured.

He recalled the altercation with Mrs Atterton in George’s study. For the first time in his life he truly began to understand what Georgiana had faced that last evening in George’s study, and how frustrating it must have been to her to be in such a situation. To be so horribly aware that people were saying vile things about you, and not be able to defend yourself and get the truth known, was so terribly frustrating. He began to understand why Georgiana had left.

When nothing outside of the window appeased him, he was about to turn away when the tall, dapper gentleman who had accosted him outside of Ruth’s house suddenly wandered out of the tea-rooms with a middle-aged lady on his arm. Their heads were close together as they walked along, deep in conversation about something.

“Co-conspirators,” Will mused in disgust, strangely pleased to have his suspicions proven right. Unfortunately, he had no idea what to do about it because to warn the man would risk upsetting Georgiana, who clearly considered the elderly gentleman a friend.

Pushing it aside to think about later, Will dropped onto the bed, tucked his hands behind his head, and stared blankly at the ceiling while he turned his attention to his next biggest problem: his forthcoming marriage.

 

Georgiana almost wept when Ruth entered the kitchen an hour later.

“You have to speak to him,” Ruth declared without preamble as she closed the kitchen door behind her. “If only to send him on his way.”

“Mr Parker-Henry-told you?” Georgiana gasped in surprise.

Ruth nodded. “He has been to see me in the tea rooms. He has told me everything.”

“I have told Will to leave me alone. Just this morning in fact,” Georgiana countered. “He won’t listen.”

“Then you need to do something else,” Ruth replied firmly.

“Like what? Aside from smacking him on the side of the head with something heavy, I am at a loss to find a way to deal with him. The man just doesn’t take ‘no’ for an answer,” Georgiana wailed.

“It is because he has always gotten you to do what he wants before. This time, things have to be different. He has to get the message that he has to return to Cranbury empty handed. If I am completely honest with you, Georgiana, his ego could do with the set-down. He won’t be so willing to come back and try again if he is defeated. You only have to do it once. He is to be wed soon, and will have something else to take his attention. Then we can all rest easy.”

“How, though?” Georgiana whispered. “How do I get the message across to him?”

She swiftly blocked out all thought of Will’s future wife when the pain became unbearable, and focused on what she could say to Will. “I have told him that he is wasting his time but he just won’t listen. What am I supposed to do?”

“Well, we have to show him that he cannot get you to surrender this time. It is about time he had a taste of his own medicine,” Ruth replied.

“How?”

“You are here to experience your list of adventures, right?”

“I am here because I want to live somewhere nicer, with people who respect me for who I am,” Georgiana replied honestly.

Ruth nodded and softened her stance a little when she realised she was being too stern with her emotional relation.

“If he won’t listen to what you have to tell him then how about ignoring him? Go about your business without a care for him and ignore any and all attempts he makes to talk to you. I mean, he is betrothed to someone else now. It is highly inappropriate for him to be haranguing you. You are a single female. Tell him so. Ask him how his fiancé would react if she found out he was pestering a woman he isn’t related to. That should be enough to cook his goose. I am sure he would return home then. Meantime, go about your business, completely aloof and uncooperative. If you don’t converse with him, he cannot talk you into anything now can he? It is only a matter of time before he has to return home–if only to prepare for the wedding. Stand your ground. He will leave. You’ll see. Then you can put this entire debacle behind you.”

Georgiana shook her head. “I want to continue to work my way through my wish list, but I don’t see how I can when he is always around. Anything I do will only get filtered through to my parents and will fuel their argument that I am not capable of living anywhere else and must reside with them.”

“But you are an adult now, Georgiana. You are not at liberty to do anything you don’t wish to do. You have a roof over your head here and money in your pocket that they can’t touch. Why, they have no threat to hold over you,” Ruth declared knowingly. She was right.

“Why do your parents want you to go home so badly, Georgiana?” Ruth murmured thoughtfully.

“Cecily wants me to get involved in the wedding preparations,” Georgiana replied with a shrug.

“But it isn’t her wedding. She isn’t even family. There is no reason for her to get so excited about it.”

“But Will’s mother, Agnes, told her in the strictest of confidence. Cecily has seen this as a connection to the aristocracy she can milk as much as possible. She revelled in being the first to hear the news, and intended to spread it far and wide-” Georgiana leaned forward and, in a startlingly accurate portrayal of Cecily, mimicked “-all in the strictest of confidence of course.”

“Oh, dear,” Ruth sighed.

“Cecily swiftly launched into a diatribe about how one must wear the right attire befitting a social engagement of the highest society.” Georgiana snorted. “I have no doubt that should I have stayed, Cecily would have continued to push for me to marry as well. My father has made it clear he wants me off his hands and has lined up Bertram Meddleton for me on many occasions.”

“That’s the Vicar’s son,” Ruth protested with a frown. “Isn’t it?”

“He is also a Viscount and connected to an Earl something or other. Either way, he has connections which Cecily has set her sights on. I have adamantly refused to marry at all, but that is always swept aside because it isn’t what Cecily wants.”

“What Cecily wants Cecily gets,” Ruth murmured in a slightly disparaging tone.

Georgiana nodded. “Well, not on this occasion she won’t. I am not going to go back to be confined and then sold off like chattel.”

“Then you shall stay here,” Ruth declared enthusiastically. “Stand your ground. You are stronger than you realise.”

Georgiana smiled her thanks at such rousing support. While she had no qualms about trying anything on her list, Georgiana suspected that ‘standing her ground’ as Ruth put it was an impossible adventure she would never be able to succeed with–especially if Will tried to hold her again.

“I need to keep my distance from him,” she admitted wryly.

“Of course you do. So, like I said, ignore the man,” Ruth declared.

Georgiana absently picked up her list of adventures and studied it.

“What are you going to try first on that?” Ruth asked curiously.

Georgiana grinned at her. “Well, I have already tried skinny dipping and, today, I went scrumping for apples.”

“From the orchard here?” Ruth frowned out of the window in consternation.

“Nope,” Georgiana replied with a pleased smile. “There are two large apple trees on the outskirts of town. I went there.”

Ruth nodded. “That’s Mr Cherryton’s old orchard. Nobody ever uses it. He won’t mind.”

“Good. Nobody saw me either,” Georgiana replied.

“Good,” Ruth replied with a smile. “So, what do you plan to experience next?”

“I should like to wear my new red dress,” Georgiana blurted out as she contemplated her list. When Ruth looked at her in astonishment, Georgiana sighed. “I don’t wish to wear it outside of the house. I just want to wear something that I want to wear instead of these ridiculously insipid colours Cecily always insists on.”

“They are the height of fashion,” Ruth murmured in a parody of Cecily’s high-pitched voice.

“Well, I look like a ghost,” Georgiana sighed. She turned a somewhat dreamy gaze out of the window. “Red is my favourite colour. I should so like to wear my dress.”

Ruth opened her mouth to say something but then snapped it closed again.

“What?” Georgiana prompted, wondering what made her aunt so hesitant.

Ruth coughed and shifted uncomfortably.

“What? Tell me,” Georgiana demanded.

“Well, if you wanted to wear something red without anybody knowing about it, you should ask the modiste to make you a corset or something in the colour. I am sure she would,” Ruth replied quietly. “Then you can wear red whenever you want to.”

“Red underclothing?” Georgiana asked in astonishment. It was terribly risqué but also delightfully thrilling. Georgiana still shook her head. “No, I shouldn’t.” She leaned forward, hesitant and intrigued at the same time. “Could I?”

“The modiste is there to make whatever you want her to make. There is one I know of who would be willing to provide you with a corset in whatever colour you want, and she won’t utter a word of protest.” Ruth smiled conspiratorially at her.

“I am surprised you are not shocked or horrified,” Georgiana began hesitantly.

“Oh, nonsense,” Ruth protested. “This is personal and private to you. As long as you don’t wear them while you parade down the main street in the village there can be no harm to anybody now can there?”

Georgiana laughed and shook her head. “Now you sound like Henry. He said exactly the same thing.”

“Well, there you go then. Two people can’t be wrong can we?” Ruth replied with a smile. 

“I won’t wear them out of the house, I promise.” It didn’t occur to Georgiana to consider just how readily she accepted the suggestion to purchase red undergarments. She loved the idea, and fully intended to buy some the next time she was in town.

“Come with me,” Ruth urged suddenly as she pushed away from the table.

Curious, Georgiana followed.

“I haven’t earned the reputation for being the family’s black sheep for nothing. I should like to show you something,” Ruth said as she pushed open the door to her bed chamber moments later.

Inside, Georgiana watched Ruth rummage around in her dresser for a few minutes before she retrieved a neatly wrapped package which she placed upon the bed. Carefully peeling the folds back, she lifted the fine garment within free of its delicate confines and held it aloft for Georgiana to see.

“Good Lord,” Georgiana whispered as she stared at the emerald green and black dress liberally embellished with black beads. “It’s stunning.”

“You see? Everyone has their secrets, Georgiana. Every woman should have something like this to keep purely for herself. I have had my list of adventures to experience as well. I do understand. I have had this dress for several years now and purchased it on a whim because I fell in love with the colour. However, only a handful of people are aware it is here and I don’t wear it. Just knowing I have it here helps me. It isn’t necessarily wearing it that is the issue here. Just knowing that one has it and could wear it is what matters.” Ruth rifled through the packaging and removed a second garment, considerably smaller. “I also bought this.”

“Oh, good Lord,” Georgiana whispered as she fingered the silken material of the corset made to match the green and black dress. “How wonderful.”

“Do you like them?” Ruth asked curiously.

“Of course, they are absolutely fabulous.”

“Good, then you shall not be offended if I give you these,” Ruth declared as she thrust a box at her that had been hiding under the bed.

“What is it?” Georgiana asked, but didn’t wait for Ruth to answer. Instead, she lifted the lid of the box and gasped at what she saw nestled within. 

“How?” Georgiana breathed.

“I asked the modiste who made your dress. She has made it for you using your dress sizes. I am assured it will fit,” Ruth replied as she held the crimson red and black corset aloft that was her gift to Georgiana.

“It’s beautiful,” Georgiana gushed. “I don’t know what to say, except for thank you.”

Ruth smiled knowingly at her. “Secrets are powerful, my dear. Every woman should have a secret, even from her lover. It would never do to allow oneself to be too open and honest with anybody, ever. That way, there is always an air of mystery that attracts attention. That way, there is always something to talk about when life becomes dull. That way, even on the darkest days when life is as dull and boring as the sky, you have a secret, deep in your heart, that you are something just a little different.”

“That’s where the undergarments work their magic. But I couldn’t wear anything red with a pale dress on,” Georgiana replied.

“Then you will have to buy one or two dresses that allow you to wear whatever colour you like underneath. You can do that now,” Ruth assured her. “Besides, it is a good enough reason to shop for some dresses.”

“But not for weddings,” Georgiana replied with a wry smile.

“But not for weddings,” Ruth assured her. 

“Maybe I have been too open and honest with Will,” Georgiana murmured. “Maybe that’s why he has never seen me as an adult.”

“The innocence of youth you mean?” Ruth asked and shook her head. “No. If there is any issue there it is purely that he doesn’t like change. He won’t want you to stray out of the box he has put you into. You are Georgiana, the pesky young girl who always followed him. No, you stand your ground, my dear. Go about your life as you see fit and don’t allow anybody to talk you out of it. He will come around in time. If he doesn’t then he doesn’t want what is best for you and you are much better off without him.”

Georgiana watched her aunt repackage the emerald dress and thoughtfully took her new, prized possession to her bedchamber.

 

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