In the beginning, I thought that what I felt for Jackson was just wild and fleeting, an insanely potent attraction. A novelty. A temporary addiction. I was sure it’d eventually fade once we got used to being together. But I was so wrong.

Knowing him has seared my soul.

As I sit in the hallway of the principal’s office—on a Saturday afternoon—I’m about to face what I’ve known all week. Our being together will change everything. It’ll probably wreck Jackson’s career.

We’ve only slept together on two separate nights. Two nights to change a whole lifetime doesn’t sound fair. But neither of us can turn our backs. Not anymore. I’m not just hot for my history teacher, I’m madly in love with him.

Jackson Kent has my heart.

Depending on this meeting with Principal Edlund, if he’s even remotely against throwing his support behind us to help find a solution, Jackson and I will both be ruined. My mind and body are in turmoil from this truth. We need him. Without his backing, it’ll be disastrous. I don’t know who else saw us, or how they found out, but left unchecked, the rumors at school will spread. Soon, kids will start staring, speaking in hushed voices as Jackson or I navigate the hallways. Our names will be the ones uttered on their lips like a sin.

I’ve seen this before with rumors about other students. The difference here is this one’s about a student and a teacher. Without the principal’s intervention, any day now, someone will crack a joke or make a comment in front of a teacher, shining a light on Jackson and my illicit, forbidden love affair. Edlund will have no choice but to either expel me or fire Jackson. My parents will be pulled into it. Maybe the police too, if they believe there’s a pattern where Jackson is concerned. I wish we could both deny it, sweep it under the rug, keep it hidden. But lies this big have a way of catching up to people. And when they do, they take away every good thing along with them.

I don’t want the situation to worsen or to get that far for Jackson.

Checking the time on my phone, I start to worry. They’ve been in there for over half-hour. I don’t want to lose my shit, but I start to mull over another option. It’s purely a fantasy. Nothing I’d ever do for real, but as I have time to kill sitting here, I picture myself driving home. I’d look around the pale lilac walls of my bedroom, assessing how much I'll need if I run away. It's the last thing I want, but there’s a part of me that is sure that such a move will hurt the least.

It's like that philosophical question about the tree that falls in the forest when no one's around. Right now I want to believe it won't make a sound. It means I can apply it to all the chaos I’m about to create in my life, in Jackson's, at school, for my parents.

If I leave, if I go far, far away, maybe there won't be any fallout for them, or consequences. They'll only have to deal with rumors, not reality. Right now, it's just talk, not truth.

The school can't fire Jackson for inappropriate behavior with a student if I'm no longer a student. Surely, they can't destroy his life if I'm not around at all. And my parents, they won't have to face the blame, the shame of my mistakes. I desperately want to spare them all the pain, but it's too late for that. Leaving will hurt. But staying will break them.

Before too long, this unrealistic option starts to sound like the only course of action. The one thing I can do is lessen the blow for everyone by leaving. They'll miss me while I'm gone. I'll miss them terribly too. But once the dust settles, when what's happened is so far in the past that no one remembers or cares anymore, I can come back to them. To him.

My leaving will restore all their lives to the way it was before.

But as I get to my feet and start to leave Principal Edlund’s office, his door creaks open. Jackson emerges first, and passes by me without saying a word. This is not good.

“You may come in, Miss Richards,” the principal addresses me. He stands aside, straightening out his yellow short-sleeved shirt over his blue jeans. It’s the first time I’ve seen him dressed so casually, but then again, it’s Saturday and this is a spur of the moment meeting.

Suddenly cold, I hug my arms around myself as I slip into his office and find a seat. I don’t know how these meetings go. It better not last as long as Jackson’s. To say I slept with a teacher before I knew who he was, sounds straightforward enough. Sure, we’ve muddled it up some more by sleeping together last night. And this morning. But as it’s too late to run, all I want is to hear what will happen to us now.

“Miss Richards,” he says, his dark brown eyes on me. “I’ll start off by saying I’m rather surprised to have you in my office for such a highly sensitive issue. Other than the short string of absences a few years ago, your record here at school has been pristine.”

He pauses, as though waiting for me to explain myself. I’ve got nothing to say. Pressing my lips together tightly, I look at the way the light streams in through the shuttered window behind him, making his graying hair shimmer, and I wait for him to tell me my fate.