Rylan

I wasn’t going to wake her, reasoning she needed the sleep more than I did. But after only a few short hours, Faith became restless and jerked awake suddenly—seemingly ripped from a nightmare. She gasps for air.

“Shhh, I am here. There is nothing to fear,” I whisper, stroking her arm to soothe her. “Go back to sleep,” I urge, but she looks up at the moon, studying it.

“No.” She rubs her face to wake up. “You need rest.”

“I’m fine.”

“I need you rested,” she asserts as she straightens herself. Though she makes no effort to move from the warm space she has, tucked in close to my body. We remain in our embrace and something about it feels so right to me, despite anything else that has happened between us.  

Secretly, I wage a war within myself as I indulge in my female’s touch. I try not to allow her nearness to arouse me, but it takes great effort to push away memories of our mating. Things were different on Nydor. She seemed…free. Here, it feels like any advances would be a betrayal of her trust. Besides, I’m not sure if those moments we shared were even real…for her that is. For me, they were the most real thing I ever felt in my life.

I lose myself in contemplation and eventually drift off to sleep. It’s a chill that wakes me in the morning. Faith is no longer by my side, but she is there, in the alcove of trees, staring out at the forest.

“Is everything okay?” I ask, keeping my voice low.

“I got you breakfast,” she replies.

Turning to face me, she tosses over one of the creatures that made for easy hunting last night. There’s another in her hand and snaps the head off, eating the ugly thing without even a grimace. I blink at her in surprise, doubting I could ever do such a thing without at least a quiver of disgust. But Faith is tough, she is a survivor and I remember what she said last night about starving. I push myself to my feet, and more out of respect than hunger, I eat the meal she brought me.

“As soon as we’re off this godforsaken planet, I am taking you out to eat,” I promise her.

She scoffs and shakes her head at me. “Fine, but I’m not ordering anything crunchy,” she tells me, still ripping into her freshly killed breakfast.

“Nor am I.”

We finish our unappetizing meal quickly and continue on our journey. Yesterday was about speed and creating distance between ourselves and hunters like Visakha. Today is a day to move more cautiously, listening for any signs of danger…be it the hunters or other prey.

My sensitive ears prick over every sound, but it seems the forest’s natural inhabitants are our only companions in the vicinity. As we walk, my ears continue to pay attention to the forest, but my eyes watch Faith. The way she takes on the rough terrain tells me she isn’t new to the wilderness, and it makes me wonder where she came from.

“Is your planet much like this one?” I ask.

She frowns and looks at our surroundings. “Yes and no, I guess. Every planet’s got dirt and rocks, right? There’re forests on my world too, but the trees and wildlife aren’t the same as this place here. Still, where I’m from isn’t so very different. Of course, even in my neck of the woods we had an entire town and this world seems…dead,” she says, gesturing around at our isolation.

“Not dead, just vacant,” I correct, making an attempt at optimism, but something about her words ring true. Who knows how long this planet has been nothing more than a hunting ground for the rich and elite? Who knows how many beings lost their lives here, alone and afraid in the forest? Watching Faith, I cannot help but think of fate. What stars had to align to bring me here by her side?

A rocky incline approaches and I hurry to her side so that I might offer her support as she climbs. I reach my arm out to her and she looks at me with surprise. Her cheeks grow red and she averts her gaze, then more out of politeness than necessity she places her hand in mine. I wonder if she feels the electricity that courses between us…or if I am alone in my affections.

“Is there a caste system on your world?” I ask suddenly. I don’t know why the words even escaped my lips and I quickly become embarrassed myself.

“A caste system? Uh, not really. Maybe in some parts of the world, but not my country,” she answers. Her tone tells me she didn’t catch the gravity of the question. We make it to the top of the rocks and the ground levels out again. When she releases my hand I rake my talons through my hair. I can’t believe I’m trying to determine if Faith would ever have me, after all that has happened between us. What would my sisters say? I nearly break into laughter at the thought.

“There’s a class system on my planet,” she says quietly.

“What’s that?”

“Class…it’s a little, different. More permeable than a caste system. If you get a good job or a good education, your class can improve.” Faith focuses on the ground as she walks, and I stay silent in the hopes that she will share more with me. My patience is rewarded when she continues.

“I grew up out in the boonies, in a little tiny, middle-of-nowhere, mountain town. My family didn’t have much. We always had what we needed, but nothing more, you know?” She shrugs. “It wasn’t rough or anything, that was just life. It was normal. I always felt kind of lucky too. My grandpa owned a bait shop right on the lake. Tourists would pass through all summer long. When I turned 16 he let me work the counter for him and I got to make a little extra pocket cash. But I was a smart kid and did well in school. When it came time to apply for colleges I was offered a free ride pretty much everywhere I applied.”

“You know the thing about middle-of-nowhere mountain towns?” she turns to me to ask.

“I don’t.”

“Every teenager who lives there is trying their best to get out. So, I went to the University of San Francisco, which was basically as far away from home as humanly possible, and in six years I was graduating with my masters in computer science. My family seemed to think I’d come home after college, but I got a job instead. It was ridiculous. I was 24 and making twice my parents’ combined income, working and living in the mecca of software development…one of very few women in the field.”

“Your parents must have been very proud,” I say, but Faith slows to a stop and I see her wipe at her eyes. She refuses to meet my gaze.

“Proud,” she scoffs. “I hadn’t been home in over two years. Christmas was right around the corner and…” She pauses before she continues, having difficulty getting the words out. “My parents expected me to come home… My grandpa did too, but instead I bought a ticket to fucking Iceland so my friends and I could go visit some mineral springs there. I wasn’t even going to tell my parents until the last minute so I wouldn’t have to deal with the guilt trip they were going to put me through. Never happened though. My grandpa died the day my flight was supposed to leave.” She sucks in a long breath and looks up at the sky. I give her time.

“Point is, class is stupid. I spent my whole life trying to change my situation and all it ever did was get me caught up in the unimportant. I’d gladly trade the job I had, the status, the paycheck, and all the fucking mineral springs in Iceland to spend one more afternoon in the bait shop with my grandpa, just selling worms to tourists. I don’t know about the Aragrandani, Rylan, but you’re a good guy and it’s a big galaxy out there. You should find a corner of it that sees you for who you are, not your social status.”

She looks at me now, her deep green eyes wet but sincere, and somehow I feel like she has shared something with me as vulnerable and precious as she did the night we spent together on Nydor. As a matter of fact, I think this is the sincerest moment I’ve ever shared with another person in my life and I’m stunned into silence.

Before I can find words adequate for a response, Faith begins walking again. I reach for her arm, wanting to turn her around. I want to look into those eyes again and ask her what kind of man she sees when she looks at me. I want to promise her that I’m going to take her far away from here, where she will never be hunted, imprisoned, or made into a slave ever again. I’ll protect her for as long as she’ll let me. But doubt creeps in. I don’t know what Faith needs right now, but I know I don’t want her to think she owes me anything. So, I let my hand fall and we walk on in silence.