Chapter Six
“There you go. That’s the last one,” Dr. Lily Bishop, Jade’s good friend and co-worker, taped a piece of cotton gauze to Jade’s arm. She’d been pricked, swabbed, and asked to pee in a cup, all under the assumption of wanting to make sure she was at the top of her game after a night of drunken, wild sex.
“And how long until the results are in?”
The paper-covered exam table crinkled under her weight as she fidgeted. Lots of new habits—fidgeting, sleepless nights, constantly looking over her shoulder for a dangerous stranger she wouldn’t recognize, faking orgasms from Jeremy Larson—yup, the times they were a-changin’.
“Well, I gave you the rapid screening. I’m sure I could pass along a request to Derek at the lab to speed things along, but either way, you should have your results somewhere between forty-eight hours and a week. However, if anything comes back looking suspicious, it could take up to a month for further testing.”
“Wonderful.”
Lily placed a label on a vial of Jade’s blood. “Now, I’m going to pretend to play along with your fib, because it’s not my business, but I’m also going to remind you I’m here if you want to talk.”
“Don’t wanna talk,” she mumbled, as she pulled the sleeve of her scrubs down to cover the gauze.
“You know, you really should have an exam as well if you suspect your body may be at risk of infection.”
Swallowing back her ever present nausea, she drew in a deep breath. “Well, let’s just say I had too much to drink and can’t remember if we used a condom. How long would it take for something to show up?”
“Symptoms can show up anywhere between two days and two years. Your blood work will rule out a lot, but it’s still important to have a physical exam to be sure.” She placed her hand on her arm. “Jade, I’m not going to lecture you. You’re an adult, but this whole scenario seems to have holes. I’m trained to know when my patients are lying to me. You’re my friend and I want to help you. I promise complete confidentiality, no matter what the case is.”
She looked at the woman who’d worked with her since her internship. She was stunning, even in scrubs and a lab coat. A mixture of Spain’s spice and Italy’s sensuality, this beautiful, willowy creature was a successful doctor to boot. She was, hands down, the best OB/GYN Jade ever knew.
She took a deep breath and sighed. “Do I have to change into a gown?”
Lily’s professional smile held a hint of satisfied pride. “Not if you promise you’ve been keeping up on your monthly breast exams.”
“I have.”
“Then just drop the drawers.”
A minute later, Jade found herself scooting to the edge of the table, where she was warned to expect a little pressure. It was a typical page in the long list of joys that came with being a woman.
“Jade?”
“Yep?” Her mind was slowly disassociating from her lower half.
“When was the last time you had intercourse?”
“Um…” She swallowed hard. “I guess I would have to say Thursday night.”
“Have you noticed any spotting or bleeding?”
“No. My cycle isn’t due until the end of the month.”
“I wasn’t referring to your cycle. There’s some inflammation around your cervix. It seems to be bleeding from even a light touch. That’s okay, I just wanted to know if you’re in any pain or had any noticeable hemorrhaging.”
“No,” she croaked as a tear rolled into her hairline. She still felt tender but it was difficult to tell if that was emotional scarring or physical injury. Life rapidly become heavy and far too real.
There were no words to explain the degree to which she’d been violated. Desecrated. Chills covered her body in a swoop of discomfort that swallowed her whole.
Removing the speculum, Lily patted her knee. “You can sit up.”
Wiping her eyes, she adjusted her top to cover her lower half.
“Ok, sweetie here’s the deal. I found no early symptoms of any noticeable STDs that would be evident at this point, but that’s what the blood screening’s for. However, you have a bruised cervix. It’s nothing dangerous or anything that won’t heal, but I am going to recommend that you refrain from intercourse for about three weeks and don’t use tampons during your next cycle.” She smiled. “And next time, try not to be so rough.”
In a failed attempt to match her levity, Jade choked on an “Okay” and a sob flung past her lips. Her fingers covered her mouth, but it was too late. She burst into tears.
“Oh, sweetie, come here.” Lily pulled her into a nurturing embrace, which only made Jade cry harder. “Shh, shh, shh. It’s okay. I told you, it’s not a big deal. I see it a lot and once your blood work comes back you’ll realize all of these tears were likely for nothing.”
She had to stop doing this. Pulling back, she scrubbed her palms roughly over her face and forced her composure into place. Nodding quickly, she said, “I understand.”
Lily’s manicured brows drew together. “Jade, are you sure that I’m the only person you should be talking to? If something happened, something involving your body without your permission, you have rights.” Lowering her voice, she asked, “Did someone do something to you?”
Sucking in a deep breath, she met her friend’s intense stare and shook her head, lips pursing as more tears fell. “I can’t remember.”
Lily stilled. “What do you mean, you can’t remember?”
“I’ve tried … for days! But it isn’t even blurry. It’s just … blank!”
“Okay.” The doctor nodded, glancing around as if the answers were written on the walls. “We need to talk about this, but I want you to be calm. Why don’t you get dressed and then you can start at the beginning. I’m going to—”
“You can’t tell anyone!”
“Of course not. Jade, I told you, we share doctor-patient confidentiality, under all circumstances. Plus, we’re friends. You can trust me. We’re just going to talk, but we’ll have more privacy in my office. Maybe it’ll help you to remember.”
Jade relaxed a little, but not enough to clear her blurry vision. She nodded and released the death grip she had on Lily’s lab coat. “I don’t… I don’t want to talk here.” This was her hospital too. She didn’t want to chance anyone seeing her upset and asking questions.
“Okay. Then we’ll go to my place. Let me just tell the nurse I’m leaving for the day.”
Two hours later Jade was curled up on Lily’s couch, pouring the last drop of wine from a bottle of red.
“Did you call the cops? Even if you don’t want to report the rape, your personal items were stolen.”
“Only the stuff in my wallet. He didn’t take anything else and my laptop and iPad were in plain sight. I called all my credit card companies. They weren’t used.”
He’d only used her. Shakily, she reached for her wine glass.
“Do you think it could have been this Jeremy?” Lily kept her expression neutral, but Jade spotted the assumption in her eyes. Jeremy was the last man she saw that night. But it wasn’t him.
“No. Jeremy’s a good guy. Plus, he’s fiercely protective of his friends. Besides, I’m fairly certain Kat did an extensive background check on him before she let him back into Mia’s life.”
“Why would she do that if he’s completely trustworthy?”
“It had nothing to do with his character. Kat’s just crazy. Besides, I know Jeremy. I trust him. He wouldn’t hurt me.”
“You’re sure?”
“Yes.”
“Okay. What do you remember about the bar? Was it full or empty?”
“It was sort of full, but it was a Thursday night. Bars are usually busy on Thursdays regardless.”
“What about the people there? Was the bartender a man or a woman?”
“A man. I don’t remember much else, except that Jeremy left around 9:04 p.m.”
“Right, because of your text from Kat. When he left, did he pay the tab?”
She thought for a minute. This was where her memory fizzled. “I think so. I don’t remember signing anything. I should ask him, but I’m trying to avoid that.”
“Maybe you should go back to the bar to see if it jogs your memory. You could also contact your bank to see if you paid the tab and, while you’re at it, check the time on the receipt.”
“That’s a good idea about the bank, but I can’t even go into my apartment without losing it. I doubt I could walk into that bar. Thanks, by the way, for letting me crash here tonight.”
Lily gestured, putting up a hand. “No problem. But what if the bartender remembers something? If you want, I can go with you for moral support.”
“What if I find something out I don’t want to know? Like, what if this is all my fault? Or what if it was the bartender?”
“It doesn’t matter if you were running around flashing people and offering to blow the entire bar. The moment someone has sex with someone whose judgment’s too impaired to give consent, they’re committing sexual assault. None of this is your fault, Jade. Drugged or just plain plastered, they’re in the wrong, not you.”
“I must’ve been drugged. It’s the only explanation that makes sense. I only had a couple drinks and I was fine when Jeremy was there. How long does it take for drugs like that to take effect?”
Lily eased back, holding her glass to her chest as she crossed her arms. “Well, it depends. With Rohypnol, the sedative effects appear approximately thirty to forty-five minutes after the drugs ingested. The effects can last between four and twelve hours. Different doses and body types make it difficult to know exactly.”
“Will something like that show up in my lab results?”
“Its compounds will show up in urine for at least five days. We might’ve missed that window, but if you give me a sample of your hair it can be traced for up to a month after ingesting even a single dose.”
“Do you think that’s what I was given?”
She tilted her head. “I think it’s a good possibility. It’s easy to get. It can incapacitate victims, preventing them from resisting sexual assault. It can produce anterograde amnesia, which means individuals may not remember experiences following the introduction of the drug. But there are plenty of other drugs out there that do the same.”
Jade definitely wanted the lab to take a sample of her hair. She hesitated to go to the police because her experience with victims at the hospital didn’t give her much hope. There was so much exposure and shame and she’d yet to see any real consequence for the predators, even when they were caught. Even if by some miracle she figured out who hurt her, she didn’t expect him to ever know the pain she now lived with.
That was the fucked up truth about sexual assault. There was no justice, hardly ever any outside witnesses, and the penalty could never match the crime. If she had her way, it would be an eye for an eye. Either that, or rapists should have their dicks cut off. Maybe have predator tattooed across their face. But the reality was, most convicted rapists served less than six years. The length of time she’d carry the consequence of some sick fuck’s actions… It was a life sentence.
Perhaps she’d speak to someone at the police station eventually, but for now, she was more worried about finding her own peace. That seemed a more realistic goal than any sort of blind revenge.