20
I THINK I can safely say I’d never experienced true anticipation before that night. Time was a taunting beast in the room with me as I sat naked on Kage’s sectional.
Had I ever been so naked in my entire life?
My skin was hyper-sensitive to the velvety feel of the sofa’s upholstery. In fact, I was hyper-sensitive to everything. The light, which I’d intentionally kept low, still seemed too bright. The air felt much cooler than normal, causing me to shiver a little. And the subtle sounds of Kage’s empty apartment that normally went undetected were unnaturally loud. In the kitchen, the ice maker churned out a few pieces of filtered ice. The Xbox hummed from its shelf in the media cabinet. Once I thought I may have heard the elevator making its way to the penthouse floor, and that little tease in particular was tough to handle.
After an hour of waiting, my nerves were shot. How long would I have to wait? What would he do to me when he got there? Did he have a key card, or had he given me his only one? What if someone else came to the door, and I answered it in my birthday suit? Because I didn’t dare answer it any other way. Didn’t want there to be any question about whether or not I wanted Kage. I was ready.
By the time I finally heard the elevator arrive for real, my hands were a little shaky. I thought I would pass out listening to his footsteps approach the door and stop in front of it. I waited for a knock, but instead I heard a card slide through the electronic lock. It clicked, and the door swung open.
Kage strode in wearing his faded red t-shirt, and a pair of threadbare jeans that hung low enough to reveal his boxers. His hair was still knotted at the top of his head, though a few strands had worked their way loose. Without a word, he stepped out of his shoes at the door, pulled his t-shirt over his head and dropped it on the floor. The jeans came next. He worked the sexy button fly with nimble fingers as he approached.
He came to a stop directly in front of me where I sat on the sofa, and I looked up at him, waiting.
“Open your mouth,” he said, pushing his pants to his hips and bringing out his cock. It was already hard, the head swollen and flushed.
I did as he said. Opened my mouth wide, anticipating the taste of his cock— a taste I had already memorized by heart. My own dick waxed and waned through varying degrees of hardness since I’d received his note. Hell, since before that if I was honest. When I really thought about it, it seemed it had been that way since I’d gotten my first glimpse of Michael Kage.
He bent over the sofa, grasping the back with one hand and leaning on it for support, and fed his cock impatiently into my waiting mouth. He wasn’t gentle. He shoved it down my throat until I choked and pulled back, only to shove it in again just as hard.
It reminded me of his performance in the ring, only now I was the mouse. The barbaric look in his eyes was still there, though now it was tinged with desire— and something else. Something that gave me hope and made my heart seize in my chest.
Kage was relentless, needy, leaning even farther in as I instinctively pulled back for breath. But I didn’t want him to stop. I loved it. Loved it when he was rough. Because I was learning that the more he needed me, the rougher he got. And tonight he needed me bad.
He pushed me down onto my back on the sofa, then stripped off his jeans and underwear. When he was naked, he climbed on top of me and straddled my chest, pinning my shoulders to the sofa. Then he knelt up over me and forced his cock rudely into my mouth. All I could do was take it and suck it, looking up at him with watering eyes as he loomed over me and labored.
His face was tight with lust, as if he might lose control at any moment. But he was strong, and I knew he wasn’t about to let go until he was good and ready. If he could choreograph a fight against a skilled opponent with a hundred grand on the line, he could damn sure control himself in bed.
He fucked my mouth with long strokes, not giving me a chance to speak. All I could do was grunt and whimper around him as he watched me closely with his shrewd, calculating eyes.
“My sweet college boy,” he said in a reverent voice, reaching down with one hand and running his fingers through my hair.
He was choking me with his cock, but loving me with his touch and his words. It was the most cherished I’d ever felt, being used and loved at the same time, being needed so fiercely.
After a moment, he slipped his hand under my neck and cupped the back of my skull with his large hand. He lifted my head off the sofa so that it was at nearly a ninety-degree angle, and fucked my mouth deep and slow, using his hand to keep my head still. It was a lot like dirty boxing. I would have told him so if I could have spoken.
He didn’t keep me that way for long, though. He sensed the very moment when I’d had enough, and he released my head back down to the sofa and pulled out. My mouth and his cock were both over-wet with saliva, and he rubbed the slicked head against my battered lips. Back and forth he dragged it over my mouth, watching me with those lust-filled eyes.
“Get to the bed,” Kage said finally, and he stood and let me up. I knew what was about to happen. Knew what that look in his eyes meant. I had to get my bearings as I made my way to his room and climbed onto the bed with shaky legs.
I laid back on the bed and spread my legs, reaching down to pump my cock as I watched him approach. Then I bit my lip, gave him my best come hither look, and surprised myself with my first words of the evening. “You didn’t shower. I can smell you on me.”
“And that gets you off?”
“Yes,” I whispered, still working myself, knowing I needed to stop soon. I was dangerously close to hitting that point when coming was too much of a temptation to stop. “I didn’t shower, either,” I said.
The more time I spent around Kage, the more his scent aroused me. I wondered if it was the same for him.
“You always smell sweet.” He laughed darkly. “I smell like sweat, blood and fear. But I wanted you to smell it on me, Jamie. I wanted you to smell it on me the first time I fuck you. So you’ll know who I really am. I need you to know me.”
“I do know you,” I said. “And you’re perfect.”
“Baby, don’t be naive. I’m a killing machine. The only things that separate me from the inside of a jail cell are a referee and a bell.”
I dropped onto my back, staring up at those same rafters that had shifted and danced in hallucinations that seemed so long ago. “All I know is I want to be with you.”
Kage climbed on top of me, planking up onto his elbows and lowering his body so that we were touching from hip to toe. Our cocks aligned against each other, and nothing had ever felt so good or so right.
His stubble scrubbed against my cheek as he lowered his head to whisper in my ear, “Last chance to run.”
I smiled and wound my arms around his neck. “Why would I want to run?”
He peeled my arms from around his neck and secured them above my head with one strong hand gripping my wrists. “Because I want to hurt you.”
At the sound of his words, my eyelids fluttered shut, and a dark need began to unfurl in my belly like an infinitely-repeating fractal. It was fear and desire all mangled together, because I knew in an instant that I would do anything for him. Anything he asked of me. And what he was asking was to let him work his aggression out on me.
He kissed me, licking along my lips, teasing my tongue with his, and finally biting my bottom lip hard enough to make me yelp.
Still holding my wrists just above my head, he slid off to the side of my body and took my nipple into his mouth, sucking on it and scraping his teeth along the sensitive sides of the tiny bud until I was breathing heavily. Then he spit into his hand and reached down between my legs, bypassing my dick and my balls and going straight for my hole.
His prize.
He lubed me up, rubbing his fingers around the outside and just on the inside, barely breaking the surface. I started to contract the muscle, loving the stimulation of the tip of his finger barely moving in and out. I knew there was going to be pain, but this didn’t hurt at all. Not this part.
All the while, he continued to worry my nipple with his lips and his teeth. It was as if there was an electric wire that stretched from my nipple to my asshole, and every time scraped his teeth along my flesh, my muscles would tighten around his finger in response.
“Christ… Kage. That feels so good.” I couldn’t hold the words back. He had said he wanted to hurt me, but everything he’d done had brought me nothing but pleasure.
My head rolled loosely on my shoulders, the only part of my body that was relaxed. The rest of me was coiled tightly around the epicenter of my desire— right at the base of my straining cock. Tingling waves of heat and tension radiated out from that one spot, and all I could think was more, more, more.
“This is mine now,” Kage said.
“Yes.”
“I don’t share.”
“Me, neither.”
That made him smile.
Getting up onto his knees, he rolled on a condom, and grabbed a bottle of lube from the bedside table. He poured a pool of it into his cupped palm and then very slowly fucked his own fist, coating every inch from the tip to the root. All I could think was, That’s about to be inside me. It made me nervous, because my ass was virgin territory, and his wasn’t exactly a beginner-level size dick.
He noticed my trepidation and smiled. “This is going to hurt. Probably a lot.” He rubbed the remnants of the slick liquid all around my entrance, and I gasped when one of his fingers slipped easily up inside me. “But you’re going to love it.”
I believed him, because I wanted it so much. I’d never wanted anything more.
He crawled right up between my legs, bent one of my knees, and draped it over his arm. The other one he left sprawled on the bed. I looked up at him, scared, and felt myself tense up. He pressed forward, positioning the head of his dick at my entrance and using the weight of his body to push— not going in, but almost. He repeated the action several times, slowly, methodically gaining position within my body. He was loosening me bit by bit, until finally he just went right in.
Kage let out a long, agonized groan as his cock slid in. He squeezed his eyes shut momentarily, as if sheer willpower was the only thing keeping him from losing it.
When the head of his cock popped past the initial resistance of the outer band of muscle, my cry was loud enough to be heard outside the front door of the apartment. But then he was in, and as I adjusted to the sensation of being filled so uncomfortably full, my body began to respond. I wiggled on it just a little, then bit my lip against the strong, pleasurable ache.
“Open your eyes, Jamie,” Kage said in a gruff voice. I opened my eyes and stared up at him. God he was beautiful, looming over me with that powerful body. More strands of hair had worked free of their knot and were faming his face. “I want you to see me,” he said. “I don’t want you pretending I’m someone else.”
“There is no one else but you.” I wrapped my fingers around his slick biceps and squeezed, thrilling at the feel of those strong muscles moving beneath my hands.
“There better not be,” he growled. “Do you feel me? Feel how hard I am inside you? This is what you do to me.”
Kage reached down and squeezed my ass cheek so hard it took my mind off of the other pain. Then he moved inside me just enough to make me vocal again. He really seemed to get turned on when I made noises.
“This is my ass,” he growled.
I nodded, but that wasn’t good enough for him.
“Say it, Jamie.” He moved faster and harder, the friction burning me up.
“Your ass,” I panted out. “No one else’s.”
“I’m gonna use your cherry ass to stroke my cock. Show you what it means to be with me.”
I reached down and started jerking off, his words lighting a fire in my belly.
He started pounding me hard then, grabbing onto my hips with both hands and banging into me like he truly wanted to do damage. He echoed my higher-pitched cries of pain with his own low grunts of pleasure. I noticed belatedly that I was getting really loud, and that was something I never did. But I couldn’t help it. He was forcing it out of me.
He used his powerful arms to slam me down onto his cock at the same time his hips were driving it up into me. It was brutal, and far more painful than I had dared to imagine, but somehow it satisfied a need I didn’t even know I had. I stared up into his eyes, balled up my fists and twisted them into the sheets, and just held on as he used my body however he liked.
“Anybody touches you, I’ll kill them.” His voice was rough with passion, and with rage. I hadn’t expected the rage. “Do you understand me? I’ll fucking kill them.”
“I understand. Yes. Oh, God, Kage. Yes. Yes.” The man was hitting me just right. That’s all the excuse I had for saying the shit I was saying, because I was agreeing to back him if he committed murder— giving him my unconditional permission to kill anyone who touched me. But God, it felt that fucking good.
Without warning or apology, he pulled out of me, flipped me over, and banded his arm so tightly around my chest I could barely breathe. Then he rammed his cock into me from behind, filling me so completely I thought it would rip me in half. He battered my tender ass until tears squeezed from the corners of my eyes, and still I begged for more. Needed more.
I wondered if this would be the death of me— getting fucked by Michael Kage. It was the most physically demanding thing I’d ever endured. Even the grueling sled drills I dreaded during our workouts paled in comparison. Kage stretched me, folded me, held me down. My muscles screamed for relief, and still I pleaded for him to fuck me harder. He had no qualms about obliging me, shuddering with pleasure as he used my body.
By the time he flipped me back over onto my back and drove his cock back into me, I was completely out of control. I’d never been so lost during sex. Every time before had been so conservative, so planned, so skilled. Using my expertise to get a girl off had been my thing. Not that I hadn’t truly enjoyed every minute of sex before, especially with Layla, but this was different.
This was straight-up animal fucking like I’d never experienced before. I had no idea what was going on half the time. At some point, when I’d ridden the edge of pleasure and pain for so long I couldn’t tell the difference anymore, Kage began to slow his rhythm, his thrusts becoming much more deliberate and thoughtful. Sweat dripped down his face and onto mine. A drop landed near my mouth, and I darted my tongue out to taste.
Kage grabbed the lube once more and squirted it into his right hand. Then he wrapped that hand around my erection. Then he lowered his body onto mine, trapping my dick and his hand between our sweaty bodies. He started kissing me passionately, making out with me, stealing my sanity. Loving me.
“Come on, baby,” he coaxed. “Come on.” Using his hand and our bellies, he massaged my cock in the most amazing way, and I found myself grinding my hips to get it just the way I wanted it, slipping around in the tight, lubed space until I was quivering for release. I was worn out, but still I pushed my tired muscles to strive for it.
Kage was still sheathed to the hilt in my ass, but he was barely rocking, kissing my lips, sucking my tongue, swallowing my moans. Sensing my impending orgasm, he lifted my hips off the bed and started fucking me again, so that he was hitting my most sensitive place on every thrust.
I came like that, with Kage’s hand milking every drop of semen out of me, onto my own belly and chest. He watched every second of my orgasm, every expression on my face, and I could feel it inside me when he blew.
In that moment, with our bodies joined, our faces open, and our hearts exposed, I finally saw the clue that I’d been missing. What I saw was that Kage did want to hurt me. Desperately. He needed to take all of the pain in his heart and unload it on me.
Because he was damaged. I didn’t know exactly what that damage was or just how deep it ran, but it was a big part of who he was. And I had to be willing to accept his pain, and strong enough to take it.
Only then would I ever be able to love him.
Later as we lay together in Kage’s bed, my back spooned against his front, he reached around and toyed with my necklace charm. I smiled dreamily, on the verge of sleep.
He ran his fingertip back and forth across it for a long time before he spoke.
“I want this,” he said, so quietly I almost missed it.
“My necklace?” I asked in a groggy voice.
“No.” He hesitated long enough that I turned over and looked at his face.
“What do you want?”
“This.” He grabbed my necklace again and flipped the Claddagh charm upside down.
My heart got all tingly and warm, and a goofy smile spread across my face. Then, when the reality of what he was asking sank in, I got shy. Bit my lip and looked up at him through my lashes, surprised to discover that I was flirting with him.
It scared me to death, but I wanted it, too.
“Here,” I told him. “You do the honors.”
He untied the rawhide, flipped the necklace over, and tied it back. Then he admired it for a long time, a hint of a smile on his tempting mouth. Eventually, I leaned over and kissed him.
He cleared his throat. “Did you enjoy the show tonight?”
I chuckled. “Show? The Rockettes is a show, Kage. That was a massacre.”
“No, it wasn’t,” he scoffed.
“What? Yes, it was. You totally dominated that guy. And the way you followed my orders… that was ridiculous. I still can’t believe it. You were right, though.” I touched the cut beside his eye, which didn’t seem so bad now that the blood was cleaned up. “I couldn’t stand seeing you get hurt. It tore me up.”
Kage’s expression turned serious. “Jamie, that wasn’t really a fight. That was just a show for you. I couldn’t really do any damage to the guy in the first round, because you wanted him taken out in the second. That meant I couldn’t really get in the zone. I had to keep it together… for you.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, really.” He put his hand to my cheek and ran his thumb across my lip. “As for getting hit, that wasn’t supposed to happen. Not in that fight. But I just couldn’t really get into the zone without tearing him to pieces. I was just playing around killing time, and he landed a lucky shot.”
“Oh, I forgot about the kick. At the beginning of the fight.”
“Now that one was on purpose.”
“What?” I stared at him.
He shrugged. “I let him kick me.”
My mouth went slack in disbelief. “Why would you do that?”
“Because I like it.” He cocked his head to the side and looked me straight in the eyes. “It gets me in the mood.”
I didn’t have a response for that.
He leaned in and kissed me. I kissed him back, but my mind was preoccupied. I reached up to feel my necklace. Ran my fingers across it in the same way Kage had done earlier, feeling the texture, and wondering if I’d ever really get to know the guy who had just been officially declared my soulmate.