Kave
“You’re doing it wrong!”
“No! You’re the one who- Kave!”
Kave wanted to step back in the module the moment he heard the first shout, but he had been a second too slow to avoid detection.
He’d been spotted and two angry females encroached on his space, holding long rolls of fragile colored paper that they had requested specially for the event today.
Dominique and Winona were at each other’s throats again, which vexed their mates to no end, as they were the best of friends. Claro and Reub were nowhere in sight. They were obviously hiding, hoping their fearless leader would solve the problem between their females.
“She’s doing it wrong,” Dominique shouted, pointing accusingly at Winona. “I specifically said-”
“They are fucking streamers. You’re supposed to twist them. That’s how it’s supposed to work,” Winona bit back.
“Maybe we could have some one way, and some the other,” Meadow broke in. She was Goru’s mate, and just like him, she was always trying to find a solution to please everyone.
Neither female was happy with her suggestion.
“That would look ridiculous,” said Dominique in a clipped voice.
“The moment it rains, that paper will melt anyway,” Jane added from the side.
She was practical and correct, as usual. Kave was stymied by the process of hanging delicate paper overhead, especially in a jungle, but the women had insisted.
“Flip a coin,” Kave said. He had learned that phrase early in his interactions with Terrans, from Jane, if he remembered right. Jane and Meadow nodded. Dominique and Winona glared. It was as good a compromise as they were going to get.
“Fine. Jane.” Kave said, motioning to Jane, who carried the monetary units. Kave was still confused as to why the opposite side was called a tail, since Terrans didn’t have them, but he watched silently as the coin toss was practiced in an efficient and satisfactory manner.
“I win! Twisty!” Winona gloated and Dominique pouted, but that crisis had apparently been avoided.
When the two bickering females walked away, Meadow remained. She was not there to mediate the other fight. No, she too wanted something.
“I’ve tried. Really. It just doesn’t melt right. I mean, it tastes fine, but the moment you apply heat, it loses its structure. It turns to warm cottage cheese with grits,” Meadow said.
“Pardon?”
“I am talking about chocolate. I need chocolate.”
“Goru-”
“He said I need to come to you for real chocolate. It’s not for me, personally. It’s for everyone.”
“I- I was informed it wasn’t a dietary necessity.” Every female within hearing distance gasped. He tried to walk away, but this conversation was apparently not over.
“Look, people will be happier. Chocolate, real meltable chocolate makes everyone happier.”
Kave looked at Jane for help. Her shrug told him that he was on his own. “The substitute will have to do.”
“But it’s horrible when melted.”
“Then don’t melt it?”
“How about cocoa powder? I can totally make due with cocoa powder.”
“If it’s not in the database, I can request it be added.”
“How long will that take?”
Generally, requests were backed up for weeks if not months. “A good long while.”
“But Kristy requested a chocolate cake!”
“Have her request another.”
“But it’s a baby cake.” Tears formed in the corners of Meadow’s eyes.
Kave knew she was a moment away from an outburst, and when one of the Terrans started, heaps of them broke out in sobs for a good hour. Jane had blamed it on hormones. Too many pregnant women all heaped together with no maternal figures to keep them in check. If he lost his temper, there would be consequences. Warriors would have to scramble out of their hiding places to console their mates. Warriors that had left him alone with their females.
Cowards.
“I am not an instantaneous source of obscure Terran ingredients!”
With the speed of only the most motivated, Kave ran for the jungle. Let them deal with their own mess.