Austin smacked my hand away from the controls as I tried to change the radio station for about the seventeenth time since we had left Manhattan.

“Sorry,” I muttered, not feeling sorry in the least. Nerves made me fidgety, he knew that, and I was anxious as fuck.

“No, you’re not,” my twin snorted, glancing at me quickly as he navigated the road. “You’re clearly stressing the fuck out. You don’t need to subject me to song changes ever three seconds to prove it to me. I get it. Just, talk if you need to talk.”

Heaving a sigh, I began drumming my fingers on the armrest as I stared out of the window. “This whole thing is fucked. She only just got back from whatever hell she went through getting kidnapped, and now someone tries to blow her up? It doesn’t seem fair.”

“Fair?” Austin sounded like he was about to laugh. “What’s ‘fair’ when it comes to a magical war that we are totally in the dark on? We know nothing. Not what’s at stake or who the opponents are. All we are running off is that bad people want to use Christina.”

“Yeah. What’s your point?” I put my feet up on the dash and didn’t miss the small noise of frustration from my brother’s throat. He hated when I put my boots all over his car.

“My point, dickhead, is that until we get a little more info, we should all stop being so fucking shocked at every new turn of events.” He reached over and slapped my feet down off his dash.

“I see your point,” I agreed, thinking it over. We really did need to get more info. After the address Mr. Gregoric had supplied didn’t pan out, or at least not yet, we should have tried harder to track him down. He had just up and disappeared that night. Kit’s chat with him in our garden seemed like the last time anyone had seen or heard from him, which was just insanely frustrating.

“Do you think she’s okay?” I asked, mostly rhetorically. My brother knew exactly as much as I already did. Sweet fuck all.

He glanced at me again, quickly. “Yeah, bro. I think it takes a lot more than a badly made car bomb to take her down.”

“She looked really rough… like she was wrecked.” I chewed on the edge of my thumbnail while I ran over everything that had just happened in my head, like a movie stuck on repeat.

“I’m not really surprised,” Austin responded, startling me with the lack of condescension in his tone while speaking of Kit. “She did just heal herself from what should have been fatal injuries and then Cole as well. I imagine it’s got to be draining?”

My eyebrows shot up, and I gave him a sharp look. When did his attitude suddenly change?

“What?” He frowned, noticing my look and my eyes narrowed at him.

“What was this Kit said about you two making out at paintball?” In all the chaos, it had totally slipped my mind until now. But I needed answers on this. My twin never kept secrets from me. Especially about girls. Especially since Peyton.

“Why? You jealous, bro?” Austin’s walls were back up, I could tell by the sarcastic tilt to his voice, and I heaved another sigh. It was doubtful I’d get anything out of him when he was like this.

“No, Aus. Not jealous, or I mean yeah, I am, but that’s not the point. You didn’t tell me. Why?” Might as well give it a try, even if it did just turn into an argument. We had a decent drive ahead and nothing better to do.

For a tense moment, he said nothing in response, then deflected. “I’m surprised you admit you’re jealous, Cal. After all, she is already sleeping with both River and Cole, and you don’t seem too jealous of them.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” I coughed a laugh. “I’m so insanely jealous of them I literally want to punch them both in the dick. I’d do it, too, if I didn’t know Cole would get me back way worse.”

“Okay, so I don’t get it. Why are you still interested when she’s clearly not that into you all?” He genuinely seemed interested in my answer.

“Why do you say that?” I frowned.

“What, that she’s not into you?” he clarified, flicking a confused look at me, and I nodded. “Ah, isn’t that kind of obvious? She’s sleeping with two of our best friends, then kissed you in front of them… If she cared about any of you, I doubt that’s the best way to show it.”

For once, my twin didn’t seem to be picking a fight with me. He was actually confused and asking the question because he wanted to hear the answer, so I paused before responding, to get the words right.

“Aus, just because it’s not normal doesn’t mean it’s not possible to care for several people at once. She already knows that Cole and River are okay with each other being involved; I mean fuck, they make it pretty clear. I kissed her in front of everyone so she would understand that I was into it as well.” He didn’t respond, but I could see the tension in his jaw mounting and knew he wasn’t getting my point. “Okay, so consider how a parent can have more than one kid. They love them all equally, right?”

“I hardly think this is the same thing,” Austin scoffed.

“Why not?” I challenged. “Why can’t it be? Why can’t Kit hold the capacity to love, or at least care for, more than one guy at the same time?” This conversation was actually giving a lot of clarity to my own jumbled thoughts while I spoke them aloud. If I was totally honest, Austin was simply voicing my own fears. But in defending Kit, I was finding my own peace with the situation.

“So, you’re what,” Aus snorted, “in love with her now? How the fuck is that going to work?”

“Maybe? I don’t know. This whole situation doesn’t exactly lend itself to ‘dating’ or anything. If anything, it brings to light how fickle life is. So shouldn’t we do whatever makes us happy with the time we have?” Jesus, I sounded like some sort of fucking hippie with my flowers and rainbows bullshit, but I couldn’t help it. That’s truly how I felt about it.

For a long time, neither of us said anything, but eventually Austin cracked and gave me a pitying look.

“I’d find it easier to believe this whole ‘group love’ crap is a byproduct of her magic,” he muttered, half under his breath, but I heard him and shrugged.

“Maybe it is. I don’t really care. I just know that for whatever reason, I’m so insanely into her that I would walk through fire. Sharing her time with two of my best friends really isn’t such a tough ask, and the way things have been going, it’s kind of nice to know she has them looking after her too.” Yep, I was a certifiable hippie. Time to start tie-dying my t-shirts and smoking pot.

“And if she doesn’t feel the same? If she’s just using you three for sex, and you all end up getting your hearts broken, or worse, breaking up this team?” he challenged with a very valid concern, and he was not going to like my answer.

“Sometimes, bro, you just gotta trust your gut.” I grinned broadly at him as he gave a pained groan and pretended to smack his head on the steering wheel.

“Now, if you’re done with your questions, are you going to fess up about this paintball makeout, or can I channel flip again?” Smug as shit, I cocked an eyebrow at him when he glanced over.

“Have at it,” he grunted, smacking the power button on his radio and filling the small space with loud music once more.