I fell asleep quickly after Raudrich left me. My mind was too full from all I’d seen that night, my body too alive from Raudrich’s touch to process all of the things that were running through my mind. Instead, the moment my head hit the pillow, I was out, left to work through all of my thoughts as I slept.

I dreamed of Kate. She sat at the end of the bed and spoke to me as if she knew all that had happened—almost as if she were actually here.

“It’s funny, isn’t it? How I can tell you the same thing a hundred times and you won’t hear it, but the minute you meet a man who calls you on your crap, you can actually see the problem.”

Sitting cross-legged across from her, I answered.

“What crap? He didn’t call me on any crap.”

In my dream, Kate was whole again, unmarred from injury. She crossed her arms and lifted her brows at me. “Oh, really? How exactly did you read that then?”

I’d not had time to read into it at all. I was still processing Nicol and Freya’s story, still reeling from the interaction with the wicked-scary faerie. By the time we’d gotten to Raudrich’s room, I was so turned on that all I’d been able to think was that I needed to get myself in the bedroom quickly or I was going to rip all of his clothes off.

Then came the whammy of my confession and all of the feelings I realized I didn’t even know I was feeling until they came crashing down on me. My mind was too full and weary to read anything into Raudrich’s last few words to me.

“I…” I hesitated and shrugged. “I don’t know.”

Kate shook her head and leaned in close.

“Well, then, let me tell you what he was not actually saying but definitely, totally meant.”

I leaned back into the grand, carved headboard and settled in.

“By all means, Kate. Please do.”

“That was a man who wants you, Laurel. But unlike most of the men you date, he’s not going to let you chew him up and spit him out the moment you get scared or start to doubt your worth or feel a little self-conscious. He can see that you’re not ready for him. You’re not ready for something that’s real, and he’s not going to waste his time on anything but that.”

There was no doubt my sister was wise, but all this seemed beyond her limited insight into my complicated psyche.

“So what if I’m not ready? Everybody grows in their own time, Kate. It’s just not time for me yet.”

Kate held up one finger as if she were getting ready to list off a multitude of points.

“First correction: People rarely grow without trying. Change requires effort and you’ve been at a standstill for quite some time.”

As I opened my mouth to argue, she threw up a second finger.

“Second: Don’t be stupid, Laurel. Morna could’ve sent Marcus back here on his own. If she really cared about your writing inspiration, sending you the book and having us stumble across the documentary would’ve been more than enough. If it wasn’t time for something to change in your life, she wouldn’t have sent you back here.”

“But…”

“No.” She held up finger number three. “Three: Even if you don’t feel ready, I suggest you get that way real quick. Do you really think that men like Raudrich come around every day? You’ve been on enough dates lately. You know that they don’t. He read you like an open book, Laurel. He was able to get right to the bottom of your issues after spending three hours with you. Issues that you’ve become an expert on burying.”

I knew she was right. I just didn’t know what to do about it. I didn’t know how to change. I didn’t know how to start trying again.

“Okay, Kate, I get it. Something’s got to give, but how? What do I do?”

She shrugged and I frowned. I didn’t want her to give me some look-inside bullshit, I wanted direction. I needed to know how to make a shift.

“Laurel, I’m no expert either, but just try doing things differently. Don’t fall into the same traps you usually do with men. If Raudrich tells you something, believe him. You can see that he likes you. Don’t question it so much. Stop doubting how beautiful you are. How about this?”

She hesitated and lifted herself to her knees. She looked beyond excited at whatever revelation had just come to her.

“How do you write your characters, Laurel? They’re confident and sassy. They do what they like and say what they want. They don’t rail against their own happiness because they believe that they are deserving of it, right? They’re different from you, but if you were really honest with yourself, I think you’d find that they’re all a part of you, too. I have a theory. I think those characters, those heroines in your stories, they’re really just all of the parts of you that you keep locked away. How about, just for a little while, just while you’re here, you let them out to play for a bit. Pretend you’re them. It may just show you who you really are.”

It was an interesting thought, but before I could say so, Kate disappeared. I blinked once and opened my eyes to find that Morna now occupied the same spot Kate had just vanished from.

“I thought perhaps ye might be more open to hearing from Kate since I suspect ye and Marcus are still a wee bit upset with me.”

I frowned. Seeing Kate made me miss her. After so many months being around her day and night, I wasn’t accustomed to being away from her.

“So all of that was really you? Why am I not surprised? Raudrich was right then? You did lie to me?”

Morna nodded and smiled unapologetically. “Aye, lass. I wasna sure if ye would embark upon the travel back if I told ye the truth. Though, at the time, I dinna know that I was going to have to spell ye back against yer will. I regret how angry Marcus is with me.”

I shrugged. I couldn’t find it in me to be angry with her. Evil faerie and cursed castle aside, I was enjoying myself. I’d lived more in the last three days than in the past three years.

“Marcus is trying to make the best of it. Although, I have a feeling that after what I tell him tomorrow, that’s going to be more difficult for him to do.”

Morna sighed and I could see that I was right.

“Aye, he willna take the news well. Not for some time, I expect. Ye must allow him to work through it in his own way. Doona take it personally if he pushes ye away.”

That didn’t worry me in the least. Marcus wasn’t like me. He didn’t push people away. He talked things out. He was more of a grown-up than I imagined I would ever be. He wouldn’t do to me what I’d done to him after our last trip to Scotland.

“Marcus isn’t like that. He’ll be upset, but not with me.”

“Whatever ye say, lass. I must go now. ’Tis time for ye to wake. Marcus is standing outside yer door. ’Tis time for ye to tell him the truth.”

With my next breath, my eyes opened.

Why were my dreams in this castle so flipping weird?