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Love in Education: De La Fuente Book Seven by Buchanan, Lexi (26)

26

Sawyer

Feeling sick to my stomach, I sit at the back of the auditorium during the graduation ceremony. The Chancellor drones on and on, which probably puts everyone to sleep, and the main event starts.

Student after student cross the stage to collect their awards, until it’s finally the graduate students.

My heart pounds in my chest so hard that I’m surprised no one close can hear it, and then there she is, looking so beautiful that my heart stops. Her long dark hair gleams as it bounces against her back when she strides across the stage. She shakes hands with the Dean and slightly turns toward where I know her family are. Flashes go off and then she disappears from sight.

My head dips and my heart sinks as sorrow rushes through me. I should be sitting with them today and not hiding back here. But after what Pattie told me after her visit with Andie, I didn’t want to risk upsetting her on what should be a happy day.

At the time my only thought was to protect the woman I love and leaving her was the only way I could think of doing just that. I hadn’t considered the fact that she would start to imagine her life without me. I figured she’d graduate and that I’d be able to come back to her and be welcomed with open arms. My plans changed when Pattie told me the things that Andie said that day in the coffee shop. I’d convinced myself that she’d spoken in anger and not her true feelings. I can hope. Except today isn’t the day to find out.

Today I want her to enjoy her day with her family and as much as it hurts to not be a part of that, I have to walk away.

Slipping out of the door behind me, I move forward and stare out of the windows but I actually see nothing but Andie’s smiling face. She’s in my heart and I hope very soon, in my life.

I don’t deal with emotional turmoil well and that’s why I didn’t explain anything to Andie before I left. I was a coward and afraid that if I did, I wouldn’t have left. I’d needed to leave though. In order for her to get this far, I had to leave. We both know that. I guess that I could have done it better though. I could have done it so that we had a date at her graduation. Instead of being an asshole and thinking of my own weakness, I should have stayed in the background instead of moving away so that I wouldn’t be tempted.

And now look at me. I’m alone looking off into the distance and seeing the snow capped mountains. It’s a sight that I’ve always looked for and known that I’m home. Not any more. The sight alone makes me angry and sad. It’s a sadness that I don’t know how to let go of, or make amends for.

My head droops forward until my forehead rests against the window, my breaths heavy as they fog up the glass in this shadowed part of the corridor.

“Drowning your sorrows, huh?”

I startle at the voice behind me, my eyes reach my brows as I turn and face Kasey De La Fuente.

“Didn’t expect to see me, I know. But, Diego was torn between staying with Rae and their son, or coming up here to find you.” He shrugs. “I volunteered.”

“I bet everyone would love to have the chance at taking a shot at me.”

He shakes his head. “No they wouldn’t.” He offers a wry smile. “We know why you did it, which is why as a family, we’d like to invite you to join us this evening for dinner.”

Andie?”

“Andie is stubborn and afraid of getting her heart broken. That’s why I’m here reaching out, or interfering.” He grins. “Whichever way you want to take it, we know that Andie wants you there. Or at least she will when you’re there.” He pauses. “Just don’t tell her I said that.”

I burst out laughing, which I never thought I’d be doing today. “She once told me that you all bicker and interfere like girls. I think she was right.”

Kasey smirks. “Family is family, and when it’s a big one of course we’re going to gossip and piss each other off. It’s part of being a De La Fuente, which Andie is.” He stares and I get his message...no more fucking it up with Andie.

“I hear you.” I nod.

He mutters where and when to meet this evening before he walks away.

* * *

Stepping out of the shower, I hear banging on the hotel door. I quickly wrap a towel around my hips, shake my head like a dog and yank the door open.

I’m left as speechless as the girl who’d knocked.

“Um,” Andie utters, licking her lips as her eyes trail over my torso, to the towel that isn’t going to hide anything if she carries on looking at me the way she is.

I step back from the door. “Come in.”

She takes a few hesitant steps into the room and stops when I close the door.

“Let me get some clothes on,” I suggest and move to grab a pair of jeans only to have her hand on my arm stopping me.

“I like you like that,” she whispers. “It’s been a long five weeks without looking at you.”

Groaning, I close my eyes before I focus on the beautiful woman. “It’s been hell staying away.”

“I know why you did it, Sawyer.” She slides her hand to mine and intertwines our fingers together. “It just felt so final without having any word from you. You hurt me by doing that.”

“I hurt myself as well.” I squeeze her hand. “I never meant for you to think that I was letting go of us, because I haven’t, Andie. I never will.” I drop my ass to the bed and sit with my elbows on my knees as I look up at her. “All I could think about with the Dean and Long standing facing us, was you...I have my doctorate, heck I’m a Professor. You were so close to finishing that I couldn’t be responsible for you losing it all.”

She kneels at my feet and reaching up caresses my face. “I realized after Pattie came to see me that I was being an idiot.”

I shake my head, but her hands make me look at her.

“I was, Sawyer. I wasn’t thinking of how much our separation was hurting you, I made it all about me, and I was wrong. You weren’t thinking about yourself, you were thinking about me. I know now that you left so that you’d stay away from me because even though we tried to stay apart before we never did.”

I search her gaze and without using words, I slowly capture her lips in a sweet kiss. I feel the tremble in them so pulling away, I say, “I thought I’d have had to grovel on my knees for you to forgive me.”

Wincing, she continues, “It was only after Pattie visited that I started to realize what I’d been doing. It helped get my thesis finished, and saw me walking across the stage earlier today.”

“We’re a right a pair, huh?”

She’s silent and then says, “I’m sorry.” Moving closer, she adds, “More than anything, I wanted you there today with my family

“I was there.” She covers my mouth with her hand.

Alone.”

Moving her hand away, I admit, “I was there Andie. That’s what matters.” I offer a wry smile. “I’d planned on kissing the hell out of you after the ceremony for all to see. That didn’t work out as planned.”

“It didn’t, but I got the guy in the end, and you got the girl.”

“I sure like the sound of that.” I grab her hips and lift her astride me. “I think we need to have make up sex now.” I raise a brow. “Do you agree?”

“Hell, yes!”