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MALICE (A HOUNDS OF HELL MOTORCYCLE CLUB ROMANCE) by Nikki Wild (37)

Thirteen

My assistant, Abby, was a godsend. I tried to ignore the look of horror in her eyes when I told her I had a fashion degree and that I’d never done interior design before, but she was so knowledgeable and patient, that by the time I left at noon, I felt like this was something that I might actually be able to pull off.

Not alone, of course. But with Abby’s help and Bear’s input, maybe it wouldn’t be so foreign to me after all. I had a good eye for fabric and reading the blueprints wasn’t that difficult. I felt a lot better after meeting with her and going over everything, so I went home feeling a whole lot better about my situation.

If I could work and be useful to Bear, then maybe it would make everything else a little easier to endure.

Not that I was ‘enduring’ anything. God, that word has such a negative connotation, but I didn’t know what else to call it. It’s not like I’d pursued Bear myself. I hadn’t asked for any of it, it had merely been thrust upon me, so to speak. But now that I was smack-dab in the middle of it, I was determined to make the most of it. I was hardly enduring anything, I was a full-fledged, willing participant.

Especially because I had yet to identify one bad thing about it all.

A free apartment in the middle of New York City? Check!

A challenging, handsomely paying position for a top development firm in our nation’s greatest city? Check!

A drop-dead sexy hunk of man that made me scream like a woman possessed? Check, check, and check!

I had nothing to complain about, so I didn’t.

Sure, I had questions.

I didn’t know exactly how in the hell I was going to be able to pull this job off exactly, but I had determination and I figured as long as I added a little perseverance and open-mindedness to the mix, I had a good shot.

And I had questions for Bear. Personal questions that were only now starting to take shape in my mind.

Most of all, I wanted to know why. I wanted to figure out what made him tick, what made him move and talk and lead his life the way he did. I wanted to crawl behind his mask and unveil his secrets. I wanted to know things about him that nobody else knew.

I’d been thinking about Zoe’s warning in the bathroom at the restaurant, contemplating whether I should mention our meeting to Bear or not, but so far I’d kept my mouth shut. Telling him seemed so petty. Nothing she’d said made any difference.

Sure, Bear could be a little rough, a little domineering, but so far, he seemed harmless really. He’d certainly not hurt me and he’d had the chance last night.

After he insisted on saying goodbye at my front door, I’d gone straight to bed, peeling my clothes off as I stumbled to my bedroom, cursing myself the whole way for drinking too much wine. I’d spent the entire day working myself up, anticipating fucking Bear again and I’d blown my chance.

I had no idea how long this little game we were playing was going to last. He could end it at anytime. Sure, he’d told me I could, too. He’d insisted on that safe word.

Peaches, of all things! I knew I’d never look at a peach the same way again.

But anyway, that didn’t mean he wouldn’t just change his mind at any point.

Maybe he didn’t have the patience for inexperienced two-drink Chloe going way past her limit. I was pissed at myself because I knew better. And I’d ruined our entire night, even if he’d been a complete and utter gentleman about it. When he’d made me touch his cock to see how hard it was, it only reminded me of what I was missing out on—as if I could forget that beautiful monstrosity between his legs.

So, I’d fallen naked into bed and tried my best to ease my frustrations. Nothing I did worked though, no matter what. I finally feel into a deep, dreamless sleep that only made me more frustrated by the time I awoke.

I was determined not to let any of those events repeat themselves tonight.

It’d been a good day and by the time I returned to my apartment, I was beat. I drew a bath in the huge soaking tub and made a cup of hot tea to relax, determined to leave the wine bottle corked. I was also hoping for a second wind, because I had no idea what to expect tonight. Bear hadn’t given me a lot of details, so I had no idea where we were going. He’d said we wouldn’t be home till tomorrow, so I packed an overnight bag and laid out a pair of casual black slacks and a red silk blouse on the bed to wear.

I had an hour before he was due to show up and once again, my nerves were raw. He’d been so different each time I’d seen him, and I never knew who was going to show up — the sweet, kind gentleman or the demanding, raunchy sex machine. I was really beginning to like them both but after going to bed so unsatisfied last night, honestly, I was hoping for the latter.

When he finally showed up an hour later, I opened the door with a smile. He was dressed casually tonight in dark jeans and a black sweater. It was the first time I’d seen him in a pair of jeans and the outline of his cock bulging against the denim sent chills up my spine.

“Hello, Beauty,” he said, kissing my cheek before walking in.

“Hi, Bear,” I replied. “Can I get you something to drink?”

“No, I’m fine,” he said, grabbing my hand and pulling it up to press his lips against the back of it. “I’m happy to see you. You look beautiful, as always.”

“Thank you,” I replied, feeling the dreaded blush rush to my cheeks. “I’ll just grab my bag then.”

“I should have mentioned that we’re going somewhere very cold and very rugged. You might want to repack. You won’t need much. Just jeans and sweaters and a warm coat if you have it. We’ll be staying in most of the time.”

“We’re going somewhere colder than here?” I exclaimed. “What’s colder than here? The North Pole?”

“Well, it is Christmas time, isn’t it? We could give Santa a visit.”

“I’ve always been afraid of Santa,” I laughed.

“Really?” he laughed. “Don’t worry. We’re going North, but not that far. I have a cabin up in the Catskills. Trust me, there will be plenty of warmth. You can park yourself by the fireplace the entire time, if you want. I’ll do all the stoking,” he winked.

“Sounds heavenly,” I replied with a smile, feeling giddy that I was finally going to be alone with him for a while. “Then repacking is definitely in order. I’ll be right back.” I grabbed my bag and headed back to my bedroom.

Ten minutes later and I was a much happier camper. I’d traded my silk slacks for my favorite pair of Levi’s and pulled the Pendleton sweater Marie had gotten me for my birthday last year over my hand. I stuffed my jeans with my favorite pair of worn-out Frey boots and filled my bag with a few more pairs of jeans and some warm socks. I left one pair of black stilettos in my bag and threw in a tiny black dress, just in case we went out somewhere nice.

When I walked back out to Bear, he greeted me with a smile.

“You look much more comfortable,” he said.

“I feel much better! Shall we?” I asked.

“Let’s go,” he said, grabbing my bag from me and opening the front door. A few minutes later and we were in the back of his limo and pulling away from the curb.

“How long is the drive?” I asked.

“We’re not driving,” he said. “Just wait. You’ll see.”

“Mr. Mysterious, huh?”

“If that’s what you want to call me,” he shrugged.

“I can think of a bunch of things to call you,” I teased.

He reached over, interlacing his fingers with mine and leaning in close. He kissed me gently and peered into my eyes.

“You can call me anything you want, Beauty,” he said, brushing his lips against mine.

“I’m excited to spend some quality time with you,” I said.

His laughter caught me off guard.

“Are you? You have no idea what you’re in for,” he said.

“Oh? Should I be worried?” I asked.

He shook his head. “Not really,” he said. “But I did tell you I would take my frustrations out on you later, didn’t I?”

“I seem to recall something like that, yes,” I replied. Something was changing between us. There was a comfortableness now, a familiarity that wasn’t there before. Maybe I was just finally relaxing a little bit, maybe it was because I could finally breathe around him, but for some reason I was now able to look him directly in the eye without the urge to pull away. I was able to flirt with him, talk back to him without stumbling over my words.

“Don’t worry, Chloe,” he said, his eyes gentle and soft. “I’d never hurt you.”

“I never thought you would,” I whispered.

“Good,” he replied, squeezing my hand. “Oh, look!” he said, pointing out the window. “We’re here.”

I looked up and squinted my eyes.

“We’re at the office,” I said.

“There’s a lot more to this building than just offices,” he said, with a wink. “Let’s go in.”

He grabbed my bag and helped me out of the limo. He greeted the doorman and the guy at the security desk, slipping them both hundred dollar bills before leading me to the elevator.

“I know I have a lot of work to do but I had no idea you were such a slave driver,” I joked.

“We’re not going to work!” he teased. He pressed the button for the roof and I looked at him curiously.

“You’ll see,” he said. I nodded, waiting patiently, drinking in the warmth that was rolling off of him. I sniffed the air, inhaling the musky scent of his cologne. I wanted to etch the scent into my memory. When the doors opened, he led me down a small hallway and another man opened a door at the end of it, greeting Bear as if they’d known each other forever. Bear slipped him a bill, too.

As soon as the door opened, a blast of air hit us forcefully. The loud flapping of propellors was deafening. When I saw the huge, shiny black helicopter waiting on the helipad like an enormous spider, I shook my head.

“A helicopter?” I screamed at Bear over the noise.

“It’s faster than a car,” he yelled with a shrug, grabbing my hand. “Duck your head!”

We ran towards the helicopter and all I could think about was getting decapitated. I crouched down, probably much more than was required, but I figured I’d rather look like a wobbling duck than a headless woman. Bear jumped in first, then he pulled me up after him. The driver was wearing headphones and waved at us.

“Hey, Alex!” Bear greeted him. Alex was hidden behind enormous headphones and a microphone that went around in front of his mouth. He threw me a wave as if we’d known each other and he wasn’t some stranger that was taking my life into his hands, all of a sudden. I looked around. Should I be signing a waiver or something to get on this thing?

“Good evening, you two! It’s a great evening for a ride! Crystal clear out there tonight!”

“It certainly is! It’s good to see you, brother! Thank you!”

“My pleasure, Bear!” he yelled. Bear helped me buckle my seat belt and I sat there shaking in my boots. I’d never been on a helicopter before and all I could think about was every time I’d ever seen one before on television.

They either didn’t have doors or someone was jumping out of them, or both. That is, if they weren’t crashing into the side of a mountain in a fiery collision of death. I was grateful to see that this one did indeed have doors that were firmly closed by the guy outside. But then I remembered that I wasn’t wearing any panties, and my Mother would be horrified if I was found dead without them. I spent a good five seconds contemplating if would be better to be found dead with dirty underwear or no underwear at all.

Bear slipped a pair of headphones over my ears and within seconds, the helicopter rose, shifting slightly to the side and sending my heart plunging straight into my throat. I grabbed Bear’s hand as fear spread through my veins.

He patted my hand reassuringly and smiled at me.

“Alex is the best pilot in town. Don’t worry, Chloe. Look at the city—it’s amazing!”

And indeed it was. The helicopter whisked us up and around the building, weaving through the skyline of Manhattan like a slithering snake, the lights sparkling below us getting smaller and smaller as we rose higher into the star-studded sky.

“You can see the everything up here,” I marveled. Bear nodded, his eyes reflecting the lights from the buildings. I squeezed his hand and kissed his cheek. “Thank you for this.”

“My pleasure, Beauty, my pleasure,” he replied.

The ride lasted for about an hour, the city falling away behind us as we headed north. Soon, the cityscape turned to open fields, the hills covered in lush dark blue forests that bordered perfectly lined crops and from up there, the horizon seemed to stretch endlessly. I found myself wishing it wasn’t so dark now that we were out of the city, because I knew there was so much I was missing, but mostly because I couldn’t stop thinking about how the darkness increased the chances of the helicopter crashing into a hidden mountain and here I was panty-less.

By the time we started to descend, we were submerged in darkness and I was gripping Bear’s hand like a vice. My heart hadn’t stopped racing the entire trip and when Bear pointed to a light up above and told me that was his cabin, I finally exhaled with relief that this would be over soon.

Of course, I hadn’t even thought about the landing.

It looks so easy and smooth on television, doesn’t it? It hovers neatly over a big X on the ground and gently glides back down to the Earth like a graceful crow, right?

Wrong!

If only that were the case in this situation.

Unfortunately, I had no idea about the adventure that was in store for me.

The cabin was nestled high on the edge of a cliff, a log cabin only in the sense that it was made of logs. It was not a cabin. It was a palace, cut from logs. It was lit up from the inside, a warm glow pouring from the windows like a beacon in the night. I scanned the landscape around it, but in the dark I could only see trees surrounding three sides of it and the side that we were approaching faced the edge of a very steep, very tall cliff, with only darkness plunging below it.

“Bear,” Alex yelled over his shoulder, as he approached the cabin, “do you need help with the ladder?”

“Nope, I’ve got it,” Bear replied.

“Ladder?” I asked, confusion filling my head. We’d jumped in easily without needing any ladder.

“I’ll just hover over the edge, as usual, alright?” Alex called.

“Hover?” I squeaked.

“That’s great, Alex,” Bear said, before turning to me. “Don’t worry. It’s only scary the first time.”

“What are you talking about?” I asked, my hands beginning to tremble.

“You’ll see,” he said, as he unbuckled his seat belt and scooted around me. He shuffled around in the corner and pulled out a collapsible ladder and put it next to the door.

“Alex, I’m ready when you are,” he said.

“Ready for what?” I cried.

“Coming right up on it,” Alex replied. I looked out the window and saw the cabin quickly coming closer. Alex slowed the helicopter down until we were right next to the cliff, the house only yards away.

“I’ll drop the bags down first,” Bear said, pushing a button. The door opened and I gasped at the force of the air that hit me. He pulled off his ear protection, grabbed my bag and threw it out the door.

“Bear!” I cried, my mouth open in shock. His bag went next and I shook my head, straining to look down for them. I was still buckled in my seat and paralyzed with fear.

“You go first,” Bear said, before leaning down and attaching the ladder to some hooks on the edge of the bottom of the helicopter. The ladder fell, cascading down the side of the helicopter and dangling wildly in the air to the ground below.

My head began shaking, my mouth unable to form any words. This was fucking insane. Go first? Was he out of his mind? My ass was staying right here in this seat!

“Chloe,” Bear said, his voice turning stern and serious. “This only looks dangerous. It’s perfectly safe and I do it all the time.”

“You’re filthy rich, why don’t you have somewhere to park this fucking thing?” I screamed.

“Because I would have had to cut down a bunch of old-growth forest to do so and I care about the Earth more than a minor inconvenience like this.”

My mouth dropped open in disbelief. Minor inconvenience?!

“How is staying alive a minor inconvenience?” I yelled.

“I told you I’d never hurt you,” he said, reaching out a hand to me, his dark blue eyes peering into mine deeply. I tried to drink in his courage, his faith in me, his strength. I was certain I didn’t have enough on my own to get down that ladder. “You have to go. It’s the only way.”

“This is fucking nuts!” I yelled.

“I know,” he said, shrugging. “Now come on!”

“Goddammit,” I muttered, taking a deep breath and unbuckling my seat belt. I grabbed his hand with my shaking fingers and let him lead me to the edge. I looked down and took a step back. It was so far! The ladder was so loose, too—just hanging there flapping in the wind like a loose thread on the edge of a ragged coat.

“I don’t think I can do this,” I said, bile rising up in the back of my throat.

“Yes, you can,” Bear said. “As soon as you get started, the ladder will tighten up with each step you take and the ground is right there below you. It will take ten seconds tops and then your feet will be on solid ground. I’ll be right behind you, I promise.” He squeezed my hand and I tried again.

Deep breath. Step forward. Don’t look down. Try not to puke.

I shook my head and let the chant repeat over and over in my head.

Deep breath. Step forward. Don’t look down. Try not to puke.

“Grab my hands and get on your knees, then lower your foot down to the first rung,” Bear instructed. I looked at him, sure that his face would be the last one I was ever going to see. Forget dying in a fiery crash on the side of the mountain, I was going to fall into the abyss below.

At least it’s him, I thought. If I was never going to see another human face, it might as well be one as stunning as his.

He kissed me and smiled down at me.

“Seriously, don’t worry, babe, you’ll be fine,” he said. “But you need to wear this, just in case.”

He held up a harness and a helmet and my eyes widened.

“Jesus, Bear,” I said, my first complaint. I couldn’t help it. “Do you have something against normal transportation?”

“Helicopters are fast,” he shrugged.

“Fast, right,” I murmured, as I stepped into the harness that fit around my pelvis and hooked onto the helicopter. The helmet was a little too big and when Bear tightened the chin strap, I felt like a scared little kid being pushed out of the plane by her dad.

I watched as he put his own harness on and fitted his helmet to his head before he motioned to the edge.

“It’s go time,” he said. “Alex can’t hover here forever.”

“Right,” I replied, sliding my feet to the edge and looking down again.

Deep breath. Step forward. Don’t look down. Try not to puke.

The cabin below looked so warm, so damned inviting. Unfortunately, I felt like I had to fight through a pit of snakes or something to get to it. I groaned and sank to my knees. Bear grabbed my hands and I turned around, sliding a foot out into the air. When I lowered it, I felt the rung and pressed down.

“Good girl, that’s it,” Bear murmured encouragingly. “Keep holding my hands, that’s it. Now, put your other foot down.”

My body swung loosely, the stability of the helicopter giving way. I screamed, clutching Bear’s hands until I couldn’t any longer, then putting first one foot, then the other on the rungs and then it was just me and the ladder, swinging in the air.

Deep breath. Step forward. Don’t look down. Try not to puke.

“Oh, god!” I yelled, fear ripping through me as I looked up at him.

“Don’t stop! Keep moving, Chloe!” Bear demanded from above.

My stomach flipped upside down, the feeling of being weightless and out of control only serving to freak me out even more, my hands and feet frozen on the rungs.

Move Chloe! I silently yelled in my head, forcing myself to move again, first my foot and then my hand. Slowly, I traveled down the ladder, holding on for dear life. My moment of worrying about my panties, or lack thereof, was gone. I was so sure I was going to be torn into a million pieces on my descent to death, none of that would matter.

The air whipped around me and my body swung a little, but not as much as I had imagined it would. I took a few more steps down and when I saw I was only a foot or so away from the Earth, I smiled a little and looked up at Bear. He stared down at me, his handsome face full of confidence in me.

It was just what I needed. I released my grip, falling to the ground in an unceremonious puddle of shaking limbs and trembling lips.

“Yes!” I cried, when I felt the ground below me. I opened my hand, my finger sinking into the cold snow like I’d never felt it before. I turned my head, kissing the ground.

I’d never been so thankful for gravity in my life.

I watched in awe as Bear quickly and effortlessly descended the ladder behind me, easily falling to the ground like a graceful cat, before turning to wave at Alex as he pulled the ladder up behind him.

“See you soon!” Alex cried.

“Thanks, brother! Safe journey home!”

Alex nodded, closed the door and the helicopter took off in seconds, leaving us standing alone in front of Bear’s cabin with nothing but our two bags.

“You could have warned me about that,” I said, as Bear reached down and pulled me to my feet.

“And miss the look on your face?” he teased, pulling me in for a hug. “No way!”

I let his arms wrap around me, grateful for the return of the simple stability that I took for granted. His warmth was comforting and I melted into him.

“You did good,” he said.

“Thanks,” I replied, the shaking in my voice muffled by his chest pressed against my face. I was so shaken up and yet I couldn’t deny the tiny thrill I felt knowing I’d pulled it off without killing myself.

“Let’s go inside,” he whispered into my hair. I nodded and he pulled away, swooped the bags up and we trudged through the snow into the cabin.

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