Four Months Earlier

One Financial Bank stood in the heart of the financial district in downtown Chicago. Directly in front of my new office building, I peered up at the magnificent architectural masterpiece of glass windows encompassing all seventy-five floors and smiled the biggest smile ever. This was exactly where I wanted to be. All those late nights spent studying in the library and working random jobs to pay for school had gotten me to this point and in front of this big, bad bank.

I took the deepest breath of my life, made my way through the revolving doors, and stopped at the security desk. I took in my surroundings. Men and women, all dressed in their pressed dark suits, emerged through the revolving doors, most with a Starbucks coffee in hand. I straightened my skirt, pulled at my navy suit jacket, and exhaled a sigh of relief.

I made it. I’m meant to be here. Finally, somewhere I fit right in.

“You’ll have a lot of team meetings next week to discuss the pipeline and also online training. I’ll put everything in your calendar, so you’ll know.” Renee, my new manager, stepped from the elevator and I followed behind her.

Low cubicles spanned the length of the office area. It was already eight fifteen in the morning, and everyone was busy at their desks, typing away on their computers. I made a mental note to make it to work earlier. I wanted to be one of the first people in the office, not the trailing last that shouted slacker. I had never been one, and I wasn’t going to start now.

A grin was fixed on my face, and I could feel my cheeks hurting already.

“This place is intense, but you’ll like it here. We work hard, and you young people play hard,” Renee said.

My smile widened and inside I was singing at the top of my lungs.

“I’m excited,” I told her, not like she couldn’t already tell.

Everyone’s eyes followed me as I walked behind Renee. I met their stares and smiled slightly toward them, but I kept my ear-to-ear cheeky grin to myself. I didn’t want to scare people away.

Renee introduced me to the group—my team. “Everyone, this is Bethany Casse, our new underwriter. She’s a fresh graduate from Indiana State University.”

One by one, my team stood from the seats in their cubicles to introduce themselves. I shook each person’s hand firmly and learned that my division consisted of bankers on the sales team and another underwriter, like myself. Where the bankers were in the business to wine and dine and get more clients, underwriters were in the business to assess the risk of the deals the bankers made.

“Welcome, Beth.” Jim, the head banker on my team, shook my hand before immediately turning to Renee. “Renee, are you available tomorrow? Plack Industries has a request on the table.”

He’d barely taken notice of me, and my smile faltered as he moved past me into Renee’s line of sight.

Renee straightened her back to stand a little taller and her gaze flicked upward. “Thanks for letting me know in advance,” she said, sarcasm etched in her tone. “No, I’m not available. I already committed to going with another banker on a client call tomorrow.”

He scratched his head. I noticed his receding reddish-brown hair matched the light freckles on his face.

“I need an underwriter there. This deal needs to move quickly,” he prompted, placing his hand on his hip.

Renee crossed her arms over her chest. I could see annoyance written all over her face.

“Well then, take Beth. Plack Industries is in her portfolio now. She’s the underwriter on that account.”

I shifted from one foot to the other, glancing back and forth between them.

Jim offered me a fake small smile before turning back to Renee. “Plack Industries is one of my biggest clients. I want you there. I need someone experienced.”

“Beth’s new, but she can handle it. She interned here before. She knows our systems and how to draw up a credit approval package.”

It surprised me when Renee rolled her eyes in front of him, and suddenly, I wanted to hide from the tension emanating in the room.

“Renee,” Jim pleaded.

Renee ignored his plea and pivoted to a sweet-looking brunette typing away on her computer. “Caroline, show Beth where the file room is. Beth, study Plack Industries and their latest financial statements, and come up with your questions for the company tomorrow. If you need help, ask Caroline. I’d like to see the proposal on my desk in two days.”

My face must have registered shock because a moment later, Renee placed her hand on my shoulder.

“Beth, don’t worry. You will do fine.” Her eyes softened before she marched straight past Jim.

He stomped back to his desk, muttering something under his breath.

I blinked a couple of times, looking toward Renee’s retreating back. I was surprised that I was being thrown into work after being here for less than twenty minutes. All the while, I was also making lists in my head of what I needed to do before tomorrow’s meeting.

“Hi, neighbor. I’m Caroline.”

I turned to the young woman sitting right next to my new desk.

Her smile was brief but genuine. “Jim can be a prick. He’ll always try to do the deal. Your job is to make sure that we don’t lose money while he’s doing it. I’ll brief you during lunch. So, you’re a fresh grad, huh?”

I studied her cute bob cut to her petite frame to her natural pouty lips. “Yeah, this is my first job out of college,” I said, glad that my neighbor exuded friendliness.

What nobody here knew was that although this was my first job out of college, I’d started working when I was thirteen. I’d had random jobs, like babysitting, bagging groceries, and waitressing. Working had never been an option. It had been a necessity.

As I sat at my desk, I realized that all those late-night vanilla lattes, study groups, and staying in while everyone else had partied had led me to this point. My hand brushed against my nameplate.

BETHANY CASSE

UNDERWRITER

And I smiled again.

Sitting at a table in the cafeteria during my lunch hour with Caroline, I watched the women in their hip-hugging suits and high heels, carrying their designer bags, saunter past us. Chicago was a fast-paced city—well, fast-paced compared to where I’d come from.

Caroline continued to talk about her family and her college boyfriend, whom she had been dating for years. I kept silent, listening and smiling, as she continued. Midway through my turkey sandwich, I was chewing a mouthful of food when a tall male knocked on our table, breaking our conversation and causing me to look up.

“Hey, Caroline. I’m glad you’re showing Miss New Girl around.” He turned to me and waved.

When our eyes caught, I noticed that his eyes were the lightest shade of blue.

“Hi, I’m Brian,” he said, sporting a boyish grin. “I hope Caroline is being nice to you.”

The specimen in front of me was all-American. He looked like a spokesmodel for the bank with his broad shoulders filling out his gray pinstriped professional suit.

“Hi,” I said, cheeks full of food. I put down my sandwich and wiped the crumbs from my fingers. “I’m Beth.”

I swallowed the remnants of my lunch before taking his hand. His hand lingered on mine a second longer than comfortable, and when he released me, I picked up my drink and took a sip, giving my hands something else to do.

“I hope you’ll like it here, Beth,” he said. “And you tell me if Caroline is being mean to you. I know her boss.” He winked.

The color of his eyes reminded me of a clear summer sky, light with flecks of different shades of blue reflected in his irises.

“You should join us, Brian,” Caroline said, bringing me back to reality. She kicked out the chair next to her, offering the empty seat between us. He looked behind him toward a group of guys congregated at another table.

“Ladies, I totally would, but I’ve made plans already,” he said as our eyes caught. “I’ll definitely take you up on that offer soon. Nice meeting you, Beth.” He gave me a small smile before he turned away.

I watched as he continued to walk through the cafeteria until he sat by the other men.

“Holy hotness. Wow, right?” Caroline said, all wide-eyed.

I shrugged shyly and peered at him through my lashes.

“He’s not only good-looking, but he’s really smart. Brian started when I did, but he’s moved up the chain, and management likes him. He went to the University of Wisconsin and I want to say that he even got a scholarship for football.” She beamed dreamily in his direction and then shook herself out of her reverie. “If I wasn’t almost engaged, I would have to hit on that fine masterpiece.”

I cast her a look, and at that, we both laughed.

That evening, back in my one-bedroom apartment, I glanced at the neutral walls surrounding me before ducking my head back into my papers. Plack Industries’ financial statements covered most of my plush couch. For the last two hours, my determination to be well prepared for tomorrow’s client call had kept me seated Indian style on the couch, staring at the numbers in front of me and writing notes.

The phone ringing forced me up, and I rubbed my numb bottom as I reached for the phone.

“Beth Boo, I miss you!” Kendy said, her squeaky voice echoing through the receiver.

An instant smile appeared on my face. Her voice reminded me of home.

We had practically grown up in the same house, and this was the only time we had ever really been apart. Kendy was my cousin, my best friend, and the sister I never had. Now, she was one of the few family members I had left.

“I miss you, too, Kendy.” I took the phone to the couch and plopped down before moving the financial statements from the seat to the floor.

“So, tell me everything. How was your first day at work? Do you like it? Are you busy? Do you have a nice desk? Oh, are there any cute boys?” she rambled on.

My heart ached from just thinking of the distance between us, and I pulled the phone closer as I felt myself loosen at the sound of her voice.

“Hello? Anybody there? Am I talking to myself here? If so, that’s rude,” Kendy said.

I shook my head, but of course, she couldn’t see me. “Kendy, life does not revolve around men. I just got to Chicago this past weekend. They have me so involved in work already, and that’s all I want to be involved with right now.”

“Come on, give me some juice, Beth! I have to live vicariously through you. Tell me your life is more exciting than being a registered nurse at Bowlesville Hospital where no one dies or gets sick. I just sit there, waiting for the next big emergency, because helping old people pee all the time sucks.”

I let out a carefree laugh. “I didn’t say there wasn’t any eye candy at work,” I said, trying to tame her curiosity.

“That’s it? Eye candy? You’re single. You’re hot. You have this amazing job. You’re a triple threat. You are the perfect package. Girlfriend, get out there, and put yourself on the market. Date, Bethany Marie. Date a lot. Have fun, girlfriend. You deserve it.”

“I will. Don’t worry. I have a plan for these things. Right now, I have to concentrate on my job.” I yawned and glanced at the clock. Remembering my early customer call the next day, I clutched the phone closer to my ear. “Kendy,” I exhaled.

“Yeah?”

“I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you,” I said, thanking the heavens above that I had her.

“Pfft, girlfriend. You got that high-paying job all by yourself. Helping you get that apartment was no big deal.”

I huffed, thinking of all the ways I could thank my cousin for cosigning my lease. “Still, I owe you,” I said.

“You owe me nothing. We’re family. It’s not your fault things are the way they are. Shoot, I’m just proud you made your way out of here. And you know what?” she said slowly, making sure I was taking her words in. “Nana would be proud of you, too.”

I bit my cheek to stop the emotions running through me at the mention of my dead grandmother. There was silence on the phone, but it was a comfortable silence that we always had around each other, a silence shared among best friends. I knew what she was thinking because I was thinking the same thing. We missed Nana.

My eyes moved to the financial statements on the floor, triggering memories from the past.

 

I peeked up from my high school calculus book and sat up on my bed when I heard the door open. “Hey, Nana,” I said, noting the bouquet of red roses in her hands.

“You know he’s going to keep coming here every day until you answer his calls.”

I sighed as I swung my feet over the bed and reached for the flowers. I put them on the wooden desk that already had three-dozen roses in separate vases.

“I don’t know what to tell him. He’s never gonna let me go. I just know it. And I hate seeing him cry,” I said, dropping my butt on the edge of the bed.

I felt the bed indent as she sat next to me.

“Honey, you’re the only one I know who can make the captain of the football team cry.”

“Seriously, I don’t know what to do. That’s why I’ve been avoiding him like the plague.” I lifted my head to meet her eyes.

When she raised an eyebrow and cast me one of her looks, I let out a low laugh.

“Bethany Marie, you know darn well what to do. You do the right thing. There are always two roads to take in life, two choices you can make. In the end, you do the right thing because that’s how I raised you. If you don’t want to be with him, you let him go. You break up with him—properly.” She shook her head slowly. “What’s going on between you two anyway?” she asked, concern etched on her face.

I looked into my grandmother’s eyes. They were dull from age, yet they were still full of life. Her forehead creased with worry. I wanted to take my finger and even out the wrinkles. I normally didn’t tell her many of my problems because she had a lifetime of worry, and I didn’t want to add to that. I leaned into her, resting my head on her shoulder. Ever since I was younger, her closeness had always provided me with comfort.

“It’s not like he did anything wrong. I swear, sometimes, I wish he had, so I would have a good enough reason to break up with him,” I whispered.

I thought of the week that had just passed. Jason had followed me around school like a lost little puppy dog. I’d known he could sense that something was wrong between us. I’d thought if I just cut him off cold, he would get pissed-off and leave me, but he’d just tried harder to figure out what was bothering me and why I was distancing myself.

I pulled at my ponytail. “We’re just going in different directions. We’re graduating in two weeks. Two weeks! I don’t want to spend the summer with him, knowing that I’ll be leaving for college at the end of it while he’ll just stay here.”

She placed her hand on my lap, placating me. “He loves you. You know that, right?”

“Nana, I know that. That’s why it is that much harder to leave him. It’s not like I don’t care for him. I do,” I said, looking up at her. “But he was born, raised, and will probably die in Bowlesville, and that’s not the life I want to live. If he had it his way, he’d be working at the local factory, and I’d be barefoot and pregnant in his kitchen. I didn’t work through high school and study my butt off to end up here, just raising kids. I want out, Nana. I want the bright city lights. I want corporate America. Eventually, I want those four kids with the big house and white picket fence, but I don’t want it anytime soon,” I said, determination set in my face. “Jason doesn’t want those things. He’s content here in Bowlesville,” I said, releasing a breath. “And I’m just not.”

“I want you out of here as much as you do. That’s why I’ve been pushing school on you so much. I can’t help but feel bad for the boy though,” she said, lifting herself from the bed. “You need to do the right thing and break up with that boy if you don’t want to be with him anymore.”

I looked up at her expectant eyes and nodded slowly.

Her eyes crinkled as a small smile appeared. “Graduation is in two weeks,” she said, her voice softening. “Where did the time go?” She reached for a strand of dark brown hair that had escaped from my ponytail, and she tucked it behind my ear. “I’m so very proud of you, baby girl,” she said, resting her hand on the side of my face. “I’m very proud of the young lady you’ve become and the woman you are going to be.”

Leaning into her hand, I reveled in the softness even though her skin was folded in wrinkles from many years of working at the Laundromat. “Thanks, Nana.” I rested my hand on top of hers. “I do my best to make you proud of me,” I said, meeting the eyes of the woman who had raised me since I was six.

 

Bringing myself back to the present, I shook my head and glanced at the ticking clock beside me, mentally counting the hours of sleep that I had left.

“I have to go and get some sleep, so I am recharged for my meeting tomorrow. You’ll visit me soon, right? You promised,” I whined. Being in this new city and not knowing a single soul made me nervous and lonely all at once.

“Girlfriend, you’re the first person I’m seeing once they grant me some vacation over here.”

“Okay,” I said, releasing a breath. “And, Kendy, I know I’ve said this before, but—”

“You don’t have to say it,” she said, cutting me off. “We haven’t heard from her. Don’t you worry though. If she does ask about you, I’ll never tell her where you went.”

I calmed at her reassurance. “Thanks. I don’t want anything to do with that woman.”

I glanced at the pile of mail held together by a single half-inch rubber band. The letters never ceased to keep on coming. They reminded me of my past and prevented me from moving forward. I’d have to deal with the mail eventually.

I shook my head to focus.

This is my fresh start, and I will not let that woman ruin it.

Sitting at the country club’s restaurant, I felt the fluttering in my stomach from nervousness. According to Caroline, the owners of the companies needing loans were middle-aged men, who I would soon learn I had nothing in common with.

Mr. Jack Plack, CEO of Plack Industries, sat back while drinking his coffee. I watched the steam rise from his cup. Behind him, through the floor-to-ceiling windows, I could see golfers teeing off.

“I’m estimating ten million to renovate and expand our oldest plant. We want to make Bowlesville the pilot plant with new state-of-the-art equipment, and eventually, we want to roll this out throughout the nation,” Mr. Plack noted.

Sitting a little taller, I tried to look confident as I grabbed a pen to take notes in my portfolio. I glanced at Jim, my banker, as I listened attentively, and stopped myself from chewing the top of the pen in my hand.

Last night, I’d instantly recognized the name of our client. Plack’s logo covered all of my moving boxes. They were a household name, big on packaging materials and distribution. It amazed me how the father of the person in front of me had started the company from scratch before it had grown into a multimillion-dollar corporation.

Mr. Plack took a sip of his coffee. “What do you need from us to get this moving?”

I moved to his line of sight, ready to fire off my questions. “Do you have your second-quarter financials with you? It looks like first quarter indicated a ten percent drop in sales from the previous year?”

“Yes, I do. We lost a client, but we have gained a few more to make up for that decline.” He shuffled through his papers, and as he handed me the financials, he spotted someone behind me.

“Kent!” he yelled over my shoulder.

When I twisted my head to see whom his attention was directed to, I almost had to hold my chin up to prevent my jaw from dropping to the ground. Over six feet of tall, dark, and handsome filled my eyes. I swore, he walked straight off the cover of GQ magazine. His eyes were the deepest golden brown, reminding me of chestnuts, which complemented his wavy dark brown hair that didn’t have a strand out of place.

When his eyes caught mine, I felt my cheeks warm because he’d caught me staring, and I immediately looked between Mr. Plack and Jim to avert my eyes. When I glanced up again, he was standing by our table.

“Kent, have lunch with us. We’re discussing business.” Mr. Plack gestured for him to sit down.

“Dad, all work and no play…” He laughed. “You should enjoy the weather and get out on the course.”

Mr. Plack stirred uncomfortably in his seat. “I’m booked with meetings all day. Come on, you should join us, son.”

I couldn’t help myself and stole another glance. When Kent caught my stare, I saw a small dimple emerge, and my temperature rose ten degrees. I wiped my hands on my skirt and looked to the bread to prevent myself from gawking any further.

“Well, I haven’t eaten, so maybe I will join you,” he replied.

Guys usually didn’t make me nervous, but I felt uneasy under his gaze, and fidgeted in my seat.

“Okay, good,” Mr. Plack said, sounding relieved.

“Dad, I’m just sitting for lunch,” he said, matter-of-factly. “I’m on my way to see Mother.”

Mr. Plack motioned for the waitress. She brought in an extra chair and positioned it right beside me.

“Jim, this is my son, Kent. Bethany, Kent.”

Jim shook Kent’s hand first as I wiped my hands on my skirt again before I stood and took his. His piercing eyes surveyed me, and I pulled my hand back and quickly sat down.

“Please, don’t let me interrupt your business meeting,” Kent said, taking a seat next to me. He selected a piece of bread and popped it into his mouth.

I watched him as he chewed. I lowered my head into my financial statements as I told myself not to gawk, but I couldn’t help it. I wasn’t used to seeing super fine men sauntering around in my small town of Bowlesville. Then again, I was no longer in my hometown.

“So, Kent, are you in the business of packaging and distribution with your father? Learning the ropes?” Jim reached for a piece of bread and swirled it in the olive oil.

“No, I don’t do anything actually. I don’t work.” Kent shrugged.

Jim was taken aback, and the whole table was silent for what seemed like forever even though it was only a couple of seconds. I peered up from my financials and studied Kent’s beautiful face. I was slightly disappointed. In the few seconds of silence, I mentally noted that his attractiveness had died down multiple notches because of his lack of ambition. The fact that he’d admitted it made him look like a spoiled brat. Bummer that the looker in front of me has brawn but no brains.

“Yes, all my son does is plays golf all day, goes to the beach, shops, gallivants with his women, and spends money that his grandfather and I have worked so hard to earn,” Mr. Plack said, sounding aggravated and not in the least bit amused.

At the tension in his voice, my head dipped lower into the financial statements as this was a conversation meant between two people and not for the whole table to hear.

“Not interested in succeeding your father in the business?” Jim pressed.

I wanted to kick Jim for prying any further and causing more awkwardness at the table.

“No, not at all—not even with my Ivy League college degree.”

My head perked up, and I caught Kent staring at me while chewing yet another piece of bread. Jim changed the subject by talking about the basketball playoffs, and I was happy that the conversation was steering into a normal, comfortable zone.

“Hey, sugar?” Kent asked.

“Huh?” My heartbeat doubled in my chest, and I blatantly stared at him, oblivious to the playoff talk around me.

“Can you please pass me the sugar?”

I blinked a couple of times before realizing what he just said. “Oh. Okay. Sorry,” I grabbed the sugar near me and passed it to him.

“So, what do you do for the bank?” he asked, spooning the sugar into his coffee.

I peered at him from under my eyelashes. “I’m an underwriter.”

“Interesting,” he noted.

“It is interesting. As an underwriter, we basically look at the company’s financials and the needs of the company, and based on their performance, we see if they can service the loan. If not, we build parameters around the loan to ensure that the client can repay us.” I noticed an increased pitch in my tone, and I pressed my hands on my lap to stop my fidgeting.

He smiled at me, and I immediately warmed.

“You know, you’re cute when you blush,” he whispered, leaning toward me.

That flush on my face started to burn up. I looked to the others and was glad they were engrossed in deep conversation about the Chicago Bulls, so they were oblivious to the comment he’d just made. The feeling of shyness dissipated as irritation inside me began to rise. I found myself annoyed that he had been trying to embarrass me and get a reaction out of me in front of my colleague and customer. I didn’t care that he looked like a model from GQ.

I glared at him, and the corners of his mouth lifted at the evil look I was giving him. The silence grew, and we were interrupted by our lunch being served. When the waitress dropped off our plates at our table, I noticed she was trying to catch Kent’s attention. I wondered if he was oblivious to her attention or if he got this everywhere and just didn’t care. When she put his plate down, her arm brushed against his and when he finally lifted his eyes to meet hers, her cheeks flushed pink.

Seeing this small interaction, I realized he must have this effect on all women. I suddenly wished my face hadn’t given me away and that his good looks hadn’t made me blush like a little schoolgirl. I mentally noted not to do it again.

Staring at my grilled chicken sandwich, I couldn’t eat. I loved food, yet sitting next to this man made me self-conscious. Aggravation was seeping into my skin because I couldn’t enjoy my sandwich in peace. Instead of grabbing the sandwich with both hands and stuffing my face like I normally would, I took my knife and fork and poked at the sandwich.

“So, continue and tell me more about the expansion of the Bowlesville plant,” Jim added before chewing a French fry.

Mr. Plack took a sip of water. “Yes, we will also be expanding our product line, so we will need more storage space. Bowlesville will be our test factory, and eventually, we want to renovate the rest of our distribution centers to mirror it. Jim, have you been to our Bowlesville plant? You would be able to see that it is in need of expansion.”

“No, not yet. Hey, Beth, isn’t that where you’re from?” Jim glanced my way, and everyone else’s eyes also shifted in my direction.

I widened my eyes before taking a big gulp of water. “Yes, I’m originally from Bowlesville. It’s a small town with lots of manufacturing companies, but Plack Industries is the biggest one,” I lifted my glass to my lips and kept drinking, hoping they’d continue on to the next subject.

“Have you ever been to the plant? I’d love to give you a tour sometime when you’re available,” Kent said.

It took all my energy to keep my face steady as I placed my glass back on the table.

“When would you like to go?” he asked.

Mr. Plack studied his son with an amused look on his face. “You haven’t been to the Bowlesville plant in years.” He paused, assessing his son, and then he turned to Jim and me. “Are you available next week for Kent to take you on a tour of our Bowlesville facility? I’ll be out of town, visiting our plant in California, so I won’t be able to make it.”

From what I knew, Kent was not involved in the company. Why he would want to take us on a tour, I had no idea.

As the waitress started to clear out our plates, Jim reached for his phone. “I will have to check my schedule, but I’m pretty booked next week. I’m sure if Beth is available, she can go.”

My mouth dropped at Jim’s comment, and I composed myself before he could catch me giving him a dirty look. I cleared my throat and tried to sound confident as I said, “I’ll check my schedule at the office, but I do believe Renee said I will be busy with meetings.” My hands were clenched under the table, my fingers digging ridges against the inside of my palms.

“Why don’t you check now? Don’t you have access through your smartphone?” Kent tried to suppress laughter as his dimple flashed on his cheek.

I had a sudden urge to kick him under the table to erase that smug look off his face. Before I gave him the satisfaction of my face turning redder than it already was, I picked up my phone, gritted my teeth and mustered up a smile. “Let’s see.”

Everyone stared at me as I fidgeted with my phone. It took all the control I had not to call Jim every expletive in the book. I didn’t care that Plack Industries was his biggest client in his portfolio.

“I’m free next Wednesday and Friday,” I said, steadying my voice.

I told the truth. I could have lied, but I hadn’t. Jim could have easily checked my calendar at the office since he had access.

“Friday it is then,” Kent said, casting me a satisfied look. He winked in my direction when no one was looking and it took all my energy not to flip him the finger.

“Fine. Since that is settled, I need to get back to the office.” Mr. Plack stood up, and everyone else followed.

Finally, we exchanged our good-byes, and as I turned to face Kent, he slowly shook my hand, holding it a little longer than I wanted.

“Hope you don’t mind, but I will be picking you up at your office. It’s quite a drive to Bowlesville,” he said.