Angel waited impatiently for the light to turn green. He was already regretting having agreed to this. But he hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Dana’s call that night. Breaking up with Sarah was without a doubt, the hardest thing he’d ever done, and he wanted to make sure he wasn’t making a mistake. But when he called Dana this morning she insisted she wanted to talk to him in person.
Alex agreed to cover for him at the restaurant. Even telling him to take his time and enjoy. As if he’d be able to enjoy anything the way he was feeling. He hoped Dana would keep it short and to the point. He was in no mood for much more. He was so tired from the lack of sleep the last couple of nights, and just thinking about Sarah made him want to bang the steering wheel.
He picked Dana up and she announced she wasn’t very hungry, but she could go for coffee so they went to Starbucks. She talked all the way there, but not about anything he wanted to hear. As soon as they got their coffee, he cut to the chase.
“So, let’s have it.” He said. “What were you talking about, Saturday night when you called me?
“Angel, I didn’t know you didn’t know anything. I’d hate to cause problems- ”
Angel waved it off. “We’re done. It’s over between her and me. I just wanna know what you were talking about.”
Dana seemed surprised. But suddenly her eyes were full of compassion. “I’m so sorry to hear it.”
Angel fought the urge to roll his eyes. They’d been there all of five minutes and he was already losing his patience. “Saturday, Dana.”
“Oh, okay. Well, I didn’t see them, but I got a call from Lorena asking me if I knew what was going on with you and Sarah.” She fidgeted with her napkin. “She was calling from Lujan Beach and said Sarah was there holding hands and making out with some guy.”
Angel could feel it happening all over again. The rage seared through his veins. “Making out? Are you sure?”
“Well, I think that’s what she said.”
Fuck He should’ve known better than to think he’d get a straight answer from Dana, especially about Sarah.
“It’s important Dana.” There was no masking the irritation in his voice.
“But I thought you said you two are broken up.”
“We are.” He raised his voice, then stopped to take a drink of his coffee, give himself a second before speaking again. He decided to play nice, it might calm him down. He reached over and put his hand on hers.
He strained to speak calmly. “It’s a pretty big detail, Hon. I’m just trying to get it straight.”
She smiled at his hand on hers. “Well, let me text her.”
She pulled her phone out of her purse and began texting. When she was done, she set the phone down and reached across for Angel’s hand again.
“Do you wanna talk about it?” She traced his fingers slowly. “I meant it when I said I’m here for you, Angel. You know that.”
Angel forced a smile and sat back in his chair. “I know you did. But I’d rather not.”
Just then her cell phone beeped. She picked it up and read it. “Alright, she says they were holding hands, embracing and gazing into each other’s eyes. She seemed really happy.”
Angel tried to hide the wave of pain that jolted through him as she read the text. It made sense. Not once since he’d met Sarah had she hidden her affection for Sydney. After Saturday, he didn’t think the pain could get any worse. Why was he doing this to himself? Why’d he come here? He already knew Sarah was in love with Sydney. Then he remembered. He needed confirmation. And now he had it.
Angel could tell Dana was annoyed that as soon as he’d got the information he wrapped things up and herded her out of there. But he didn’t care. He didn’t even finish his coffee. After that text he couldn’t stomach anything.
He dropped her off and went back to the restaurant. Alex was on the phone in the back office when he walked in. He put his hand over the receiver and sat up when he saw Angel. “That was fast.”
“Yep, just had coffee.” Angel grabbed an apron from the shelf. He saw Alex hang up the phone. “You can take off now if you want. I got it from here.”
“That was Valerie.”
Angel slowed down for a second but didn’t look at Alex. “Yeah?”
Angel hadn’t even turned on his phone in the past two days. Told everyone he’d misplaced it and to just call the restaurant or the house. The last thing he wanted was to hear Sarah apologize for being in love with Sydney. He’d rather never speak to her again.
“Yeah,” Alex said. “You won’t have to worry about seeing Sarah around here anymore.”
Angel stopped tying the apron and looked at Alex. “Why’s that?”
“She’s leaving for Arizona.” Alex stood up. “Tonight.”
Angel’s stomach roiled. He couldn’t understand why that bothered him so much. He knew she’d be leaving soon. But she wasn’t supposed to have left until Christmas and that was more than a week away.
He finished tying his apron and shrugged. “Good for her.”
He rushed past Alex and made his way to the office door. He didn’t want to hear anymore about Sarah, let alone talk about her.
“Hey, Angel,” Alex said. “Valerie said Sarah and that dude are really just close friends.”
Angel was still searing from what Dana’s friend had said about them at the beach. Was it possible that Alex of all people was falling for this crap too? Admittedly, he’d thought about that possibility himself about a hundred times since Saturday. But it made no sense, and after today he was even more convinced it couldn’t be true.
Angel barked a laugh. “That’s bullshit, Alex.”
“Yeah, that’s what I said.”
In a killing mood, Angel turned on Alex, “Then why the hell are you telling me?”
Alex smirked at Angel’s rising temper. “Because she made a pretty good argument.”
Keeping his stony gaze on Alex, Angel didn’t move. “She’s in love with him.”
“Did she tell you that?”
“She didn’t have to.” Angel charged out the door leaving Alex behind in the office. He was done with this subject. But Alex wasn’t. He followed Angel to the back door of the restaurant. Angel knew Alex was never one to meddle, but he had a feeling Valerie was behind his sudden need to pry.
“She’s been crying for days, Angel.”
Angel slowed his step a bit. He was beginning to feel sick again. The last couple of days had been hell for him, but he hated the thought of Sarah hurting. The image of her and Sydney assaulted his mind again and he clenched his jaw.
“I don’t want to hear about it.” He snarled and continued toward the back door.
“I’m just saying.” Alex continued. “If you ask me-”
Angel spun around. He was ending this now. “You’re an annoying ass. And no one’s asking you, so just drop it.”
Alex laughed at that. But put his hands up in the air and walked away. Angel stormed through the hallway toward the back entrance of the restaurant.
Truth was, he’d choked up a hell of a lot in the past two days himself. He was glad Sarah had left now, because he sure as shit didn’t know how he’d be able to handle seeing her at school. She might be in love with someone else but his feelings for her hadn’t changed at all. They were still every bit as profound as they’d always been. Add to that, the raw emotional turmoil he was now carrying, and he knew seeing her again would be brutal.
The phone had been ringing the whole time he was walking. Anxious for a break from his thoughts he answered the phone just inside the back door.
“Moreno’s, Angel speaking.”
“I, uh, just wanted to say goodbye.” Sarah’s voice was a whisper.
Angel felt his windpipe being squeezed. Could this day get any worse? He froze for a second. He said the only thing that came to his muddled mind. “You’re leaving early.”
He heard her take a deep breath. “Yeah, no sense in sticking around.”
Of course not. That was the final blow. His heart could take no more. “Be happy, Sarah, goodbye.” Enraged, that his voice cracked on the last word, Angel didn’t wait for her to reply and hung up.
*
Sarah stared out the bus window at the last California sunset she’d be seeing for a long time. She’d added yet another reason to be mad at herself.
Besides the fact that she’d never forgive herself for hurting Angel, she had topped it off by going against her better judgment calling him. She couldn’t help herself. When Valerie mentioned she’d just got off the phone with Alex and he said Angel had just got there. She knew she had a better chance getting a hold of him there than on his cell and she longed to hear his voice just one more time before she left. She’d had the preposterous notion that it would give her closure. Instead it only intensified the agony.
His voice was so icy and bitter. Nothing like what it once had been. His distaste for her now was what hurt the most. He’d never look at her the way he once had and the pain was devastating.
Sydney didn’t know she would be in Flagstaff tonight. Sarah had asked him to meet her at the bus stop tomorrow afternoon. When she spoke with him that morning he was still feeling terrible about the whole thing and thought maybe if he talked to Angel he might get through to him.
Before today she might’ve thought it a good idea. A tiny part of her was still holding on to the belief that Angel’s love for her would help him accept her relationship with Sydney. But with the knowledge that Angel had moved on so quickly and was already meeting up with Dana, Sarah lost all hope. She’d obviously been in denial all this time.
Tomorrow was a big day. If Sydney knew what her plans were he’d insist on going with her. But this was something she needed to do on her own. She’d already reserved a hotel room to stay in Flagstaff for the night.
She still had at least three hours before she arrived. She tried to nap but couldn’t. Valerie lent her a book on the power of thought, and positive thinking. She closed her eyes, put her head back, and tried to think of happier times.
She remembered the day she met Sydney, the heavy kid in the cafeteria at her elementary school. She’d seen him before that day but she was so shy she would’ve never dreamed of talking to anyone that didn’t talk to her first. Besides, by that point, Sarah had stopped wanting to make friends anymore. She never knew how long she’d be in the same school.
Sydney had sat across from her that day and just started talking. Sarah offered him her fries when she saw he finished his and he took them. He claimed he had friends but he didn’t care for the playground, it was too hot. So, he preferred to hang out in the cafeteria instead.
It wasn’t long before Sarah found out the real reason he had no friends. His weight was a big issue. The kids made fun of him relentlessly. He brushed it off like he didn’t care. But she could see it hurt him and now she knew even better. She was so glad now that she’d been there for him. In hindsight it was like something had brought them together. They needed each other.
Someone behind Sarah sneezed loudly and brought her out of her memory. She frowned. She’d finally been able to think of something other than her heartache. Valerie had been right. This was working. But the best part is she’d begun to doze off. She closed her eyes and tried to think of happy thoughts again. For the first time in days Sarah got some sleep.