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My Big Fat Alien Wedding (Alienn, Arkansas Book 3) by Fiona Roarke (18)


Chapter Eighteen

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The night before the wedding


Axel paced in front of his desk, trying to think up a good excuse to avoid his bachelor party. He wasn’t in the mood. No one could make him go. How could he get out of this stupid Earther night before the wedding tradition? Forget that. How could he get out of the wedding?

“If you wish to cancel this arranged marriage, now would be the time to do so.” Axel had relived his father’s words over and over since hearing them the night before.

His parents knew how he felt about marrying Francine. All agreed she should not have to suffer the shame of being jilted. He’d told them Lucy’s feelings on the matter. They understood the only way out was if the Duvalls canceled the agreement. They didn’t. Instead, they promised Ardelia something equal to the price and availability of a white unicorn with a rainbow sparkled horn to shut her up. He was glad she wasn’t his prospective bride. Whoever that poor sod ended up being was going to have his hands full.

There was a knock at his office door. He hesitated, not wanting to talk to anyone about anything, but after a few seconds relented. “Come in.”

Valene poked her head inside. “What are you still doing here? Isn’t your bachelor party about to start?”

Axel nodded. He sat down on the small sofa against the wall and put his head in his hands. “I don’t want to go. I’ve been trying to think of a good excuse. I don’t suppose you have any ideas?”

Valene came inside and closed the door behind her. “What is your problem?”

“I don’t want to marry Francine.”

“Why not? She’s lovely.”

“She is. And she deserves someone who loves her. I like her very much, but I don’t love her. Not like a husband should love his wife.”

Valene crossed her arms and approached him slowly. “It’s said that after spending time together, often couples of arranged marriages learn to love each other.”

Axel shook his head. “Not going to happen.”

“Why not?”

“What if I told you that I’m in love with someone else?”

Valene sat down in the chair next to him and took one of his hands between hers. “Does this someone love you, too, or is it one-sided?”

He shrugged. Lucy loved him, but she would never hurt Francine. “It’s not one-sided, but that fact will never be spoken aloud.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I can’t explain without betraying a confidence. Sorry.”

“Okay. What are you going to do?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re not going to be a runaway groom, are you? I understand your feelings and all, but I’ve gone to a lot of work for this speedy Earther wedding, you know?”

“I know. I’m not going to run away. I promise. The Royal Magistrate Guard would eventually track me down. And I don’t want to live my life on the run, looking over my shoulder until they catch me. And they would.”

“True.”

“There is nothing I can do. I’m stuck. I am doomed if I do and doomed if I don’t go through with this arranged wedding. My singular chance was if Francine’s parents had called it off last night. Since that didn’t happen, I’m back to stuck.”

Valene pressed her hands together, exerting pressure on his fingers. He looked into her steadfast gaze. “Don’t do anything foolish, Axel.”

“What do you mean?”

Her stare remained steady. He was unable to look away.

“I mean, don’t do anything to alter the wedding plans.”

“There’s nothing I can do. That’s the problem.”

“Well, stop trying to think something up. Go with the flow.”

“Why?”

Valene lowered her head, briefly shaking it. She lifted her gaze and in a low-pitched, pleading tone, said, “You have to trust me, Axel. The wedding will be beautiful. It will be perfect in every single way. You’ll see. Please don’t run away. Please don’t do anything to ruin the day.”

Axel knew Valene was trying to help. She had done a lot in the past couple of weeks to see that all the details were perfect so Francine’s snobby parents wouldn’t find fault with her work.

Not to mention that she faced a daunting task with her own love life if she continued to see the human sheriff, Wyatt Campbell.

Did Valene want Axel to consider moving to Alpha-Prime with Francine after their wedding? Was she working so hard to make everything just right so that when she announced to the world her choice of mate, she’d move to Alpha-Prime and at least have family there in the form of Axel and his bride?

Axel loved his sister, but wasn’t certain he’d be willing to promise a galactic move. If he went to Alpha-Prime, Lucy would be there. Eventually, she’d be married off to whatever Alpha goober guy her parents had arranged for her to marry.

He couldn’t think of a worse future. Every holiday, family gathering and social outing, they’d all be together. His sister, happily in love with her human mate, would see Axel and Francine doing their best to be friends and keep the peace along with Lucy and her goober dude doing the same.

Axel mentally shook his head to dissolve the vision of the imaginary family gathering. He didn’t want to picture Lucy with anyone else, goober dude or not.

“Promise me out loud, Axel,” Valene said.

He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. “I promise not to ruin the wedding plans for tomorrow that you worked so hard on.” She still held fast to his hands, thereby thwarting any attempt to cross his fingers.

“Go to the bachelor party. It’s just our brothers and one or two others.”

“Others? What others?”

She shrugged. “It’s possible that Cam invited Wyatt Campbell and Hunter Valero, since the party is at a human bar.” Hunter was the human sheriff of Old Coot, Arkansas.

Axel nodded. “Okay. I’ll go,” he said, sounding like he was headed to his own execution.

“And try to cheer up.”

He grinned exaggeratedly, widening his eyes to look manic and scary.

“Perfect.” She winked.

He laughed and hugged his sister close. “Thanks, Valene. I do appreciate all you’ve done.”

“You’re welcome. And you’ll see. This wedding is going to be absolutely perfect.” She sounded so confident, it was difficult not to be swept up in her enthusiasm. Even so, regardless of the perfection of this wedding, the most important part was not going to be quite right.

Francine as his blushing bride was never going to be any part of perfection, no matter how hard his sister worked to make this a magical day for them.

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Wedding Day


The sun shone down with perfect clarity for the wedding ceremony scheduled in the early afternoon. Regretfully, from Lucy’s point of view, the day was expected to be perfect for an outdoor wedding in Arkansas.

In the distance through the lovely forest of trees, she could see Maxwell the Martian dangling from the Alienn, Arkansas, water tower. A smile shaped her mouth until reality set in. This day would be a very long ride on the struggle bus. She’d overheard Valene say that to Aunt Dixie several days ago.

As if sensing Lucy’s thoughts, Valene approached with one man carrying a spray of lovely flowers and another carrying a waist-high pillar. All were headed for the stage.

“Okay,” Valene said in a rushed tone. “Put the pillar there and the flowers on top.” She pointed to a place along one side of the platform. “Then go back and get the matching set and put them on the opposite side. Try to make it even.”

There was a single step platform in place where the officiate would stand to join Axel and Francine. Fresh bunches of flowers on pedestals framed the outer walkways. Chairs waited like soldiers facing inspection on either side of a wide path down the center, ready for the bride and her maid of honor to walk down and greet the groom and his best man.

Lucy’s eyes lingered on the archway decorated with fresh flowers, green vines and tiny lights that Axel had requested. She would pass under it once, on her way with Francine to the altar. After the ceremony, the newly married couple would walk beneath it as man and wife.

Lucy tried not to think about that. She’d cling to Cam’s arm and try not to cry copious useless tears.

Because there would be a few humans also attending the wedding, all the Alphas involved were warned to be careful about what they discussed at the reception.

The skies were clear, blue and beautiful as Lucy readied herself for the difficult event. She went with Valene from the Nebula Nail Salon directly to the wedding venue.

A former residence turned into a restaurant and then into a little-used warehouse of sorts, the venue had seen a surge in popularity since Maxwell the Martian had been added to the water tower several years ago. The spot became a popular party, wedding, and event place for the surrounding area.

Lucy kept busy with Valene seeing to the endless last-minute details of the ceremony and the reception.

“Come with me, Lucy. The rest of the wedding party is arriving from the nail salon. You’ll be responsible for staying close to Francine until the ceremony starts. Try to keep her calm. I understand your mother has been picking at the bride all morning as they got their hair and nails done.”

“Picking?”

“You know. Unproductive remarks and digs about things Francine doesn’t need to think about today.”

“Like what?” Lucy didn’t mean to be obtuse, but her mind had been wandering to its own unproductive places.

“You know, like how she has to convince her new husband to move to Alpha-Prime, how the ceremony on our home planet will be so much better than this honky-tonk affair. Where she heard that term, I’ll never know. Perhaps Aunt Dixie was paraphrasing when she told me what she overheard.”

Lucy tried not to laugh, but every story about Aunt Dixie made her smile or laugh out loud. It helped lighten her morose attitude. “Okay. I’ll stick to Francine like glue and deflect my mother.”

Valene glanced at a pretty bangle on her wrist. It looked not unlike the bracelets Axel and Francine had chosen to exchange instead of the more traditional Earther finger rings.

“In exactly one hour the ceremony begins. In forty-five minutes, everyone except you, me and Francine will head out to the chairs where all the other guests are.

“You and I will ensure Francine is dressed and completely ready to go. I’ll head down the aisle to my seat up front with the groom’s family and signal the lady playing the piano on my way. The maid of honor will walk down the aisle next, then the bride.”

Lucy nodded and swallowed hard. Struggle bus, here I come.

“Oh, one more thing I forgot to mention,” Valene said in a hushed tone. “Directly after the ceremony when the bride and groom walk down the aisle, followed by the best man and maid of honor, the foursome will not go directly to the reception.”

“Where will we go?”

“The photographer wants to get some shots of everyone in the bridal party before they start eating. He set up a place in the room where the bride is getting ready. So just head there. I already told Francine so she knows, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Good. This is going to be the most beautiful wedding, Lucy. You’ll see. It’s going to be perfection.”

Lucy looked around at all the decorations. “It will be beautiful.” Francine had made every selection that she would have regarding the colors and flowers and being outdoors and everything. “Thank you, Valene.”

“For what?”

“You’ve worked really hard to make everything nice. I don’t expect you’ll hear that from anyone on my side of the family except Francine.”

Valene grinned. “Well, Francine said the same thing about you. You’re most welcome. It was my absolute pleasure to make this day perfect.”

Lucy’s eyes filled up, but she closed them and looked down so Valene wouldn’t see her cry. She didn’t need to add another task to the other woman’s list of things to do. Keep the maid of honor from having a meltdown wasn’t what Valene needed as an added chore. Thankfully, Lucy had stuffed a tissue in the wrist of her sleeve. She pulled it out to dab at her eyes.

“Don’t start crying yet,” Valene said off-handedly. “The perfect ceremony for the perfect couple hasn’t even started yet.”

Perfect was a stretch as far as Lucy was concerned. Hopefully the day would go by superfast. She had to hold it together until after the lengthy reception filled with things such as the first dance together, cake cutting, picture taking, game playing and other assorted time-consuming annoyances and she could finally put herself to bed, where she could at long last cry her eyes out until she fell asleep, utterly alone.

At least she would have a small break for a few minutes right after the ceremony to get herself together while the photographer was snapping pictures of the mostly happy couple and the other two in the wedding party.

Lucy would need to take a mental pause on the way down the aisle as she followed the bride and groom or the pictures would show clear signs of the meltdown she already yearned for.