He woke early with Ainsley locked in his arms. She fit perfectly, her lovely body pressed against him in all of the perfect places. Looking down at her face, she near glowed in her sleep, her flawless skin creamy in the first rays of the sun, just a touch of pink staining her cheeks.

She’d told him that she was worried that she was simply a passing fancy for him. But he was honestly worried about the same. She was young, flawless, and blooming like a flower before his eyes. What if she soon realized he wasn’t good enough for her? Would she leave him to find a man who hadn’t been stained by his past? Who could love her the way she deserved and not remain distant as he had done?

There was only one solution he could think of. And that was to wed her as soon as possible. Before she realized how much better she was than him.

Kissing her softly on the brow, he rose from the bed and tiptoed about, gathering his clothing from the floor. Once dressed, he walked softly to the door and opened it as quietly as he could to slip out of the room. The door closed behind him with a soft click.

Striding down the hall, he made his way to his room to wash and change. The next few hours were not going to be easy.

After a small breakfast, he set himself to wait for Ewan. He’d told Ainsley that he would ask for her hand again but that was before. Now that’d he ruined her, he’d confess and they would wed. He ignored the warning voice that said it was a terrible plan. That he should seek Ainsley’s hand by asking again.

What if she refused, he argued with himself. What if she’d realized he wasn’t enough to be her husband? Everyone in his life realized he wasn’t worthy of love. It was better to tie her to him before it was too late.

When Ewan finally arrived, he stood, crossing to the man before he’d even sat. “May I have a word?”

A look of concern crossed Ewan’s face before he nodded his consent and gestured toward the door. They made their way to Ewan’s office. Ewan was silent as they walked the short distance. Entering the office, he settled himself behind the desk. “What is this about?” His rough tone told James that Ewan had an inkling.

James took a deep breath. He pushed the voice aside that told him this was his chance to change his plan. That this was a mistake. “I’m here to offer for Ainsley.”

Ewan sat back in his chair, looking slightly relieved. “Well, that is good news. I was worried for a moment.” He drew out a piece of paper from his drawer. “Has Ainsley spoken with her mother? Have you? Did she give her formal consent to court? Did you wish me to seek Haggis’s consent?”

“I am not asking for any of that.” James swallowed. He had the good sense to be nervous in the moment. “I should be more specific. I’ve ruined Ainsley and I wish to make it right by marrying her as soon as possible.”

Ewan’s hand stilled, perched over the paper as he stared at James for several seconds. “You’ve what?”

“Please Ewan, don’t make me repeat it.” He spread his hands out on the desk in a gesture of peace. It wasn’t that Ewan frightened him as a man. It was more what he represented. He could refuse, challenge James to a duel, toss him out of the house, tell Lord Ravenscraig to never allow Ainsley to speak to James again. All of which he wished he’d thought of prior to this moment.

Ewan stood and James did the same. “Repeat it,” Ewan growled. “Repeat how I am going to have to write to Ainsley’s father and inform him that his daughter was ruined under my watch. He will despise us both, do you understand that?”

James winced. He hadn’t thought of that either, damn it all to hell. He’d only been thinking of the quickest way to make Ainsley his forever. “What would you have me do?”

Ewan leaned across the desk. “I wasn’t a saint before I married, but I sought Clarissa’s father’s approval. More importantly, I sought Clarissa’s.”

“What if Ainsley refuses?” James stood straighter. He’d take her away before he’d allow that to happen. He couldn’t lose her now.

Ewan stepped around the desk. “You explain the situation to her. But at the very least, you will gain her consent. Haggis will not abide his daughter being married to a man she doesn’t want. He’d see her ruined first.”

That surprised James. “He wouldn’t.”

“He loves his daughter and, above all, wants to see her happy.”

Pain rumbled deep in his chest. He’d give anything to experience that kind of love. And it frightened him because, if he could just make Ainsley his, he’d have some piece of that. But now she could refuse. And he couldn’t lose her now. He’d only just begun to understand how it felt to love someone.

* * *

Ainsley woke to the sound of the door closing and found herself in bed alone. Unease filled her as her hand slid to where James had slept. It was still warm. Why hadn’t he stayed with her or at least woken her before he left?

She didn’t regret last night. It had been magical, but she wished he wasn’t so distant.

Laying in bed, she thought about what came next. Did she marry him? Society certainly thought she should. But she wasn’t sure. She was falling in love, she knew that. But, most times, he was so hard to reach.

With a sigh she finally got up and began to ready herself for the day. Making her way to breakfast, she found the room devoid of family. Truthfully, she didn’t mind the silence. Helping herself to some food she sat down to eat, finding that she was quite hungry.

Just as she was about to finish, the door opened. Looking up to see who it was, she gave Ewan a smile as he walked into the room. His return stare was devoid of emotion. Unease once again filled her as he came to stand next to her.

“Is everything all right?” she asked him her brow furrowing.

“No,” he answered, crossing his arms. “You’ve put me in a very tenuous situation.”

She swallowed down the lump that had formed in her throat, her unease turning to dread. “What do you mean?”

“You know exactly what I mean. James sought an audience first thing this morning.” Ewan’s rough voice grated across her nerves. “Because of what he’s done, he’s asked me for your hand.”

“James did what?” Was all she could push out, her eyes casting down to her plate.

“You father is going to have my head,” Ewan growled. “How could you be so careless?”

That did it. She went from being anxious to angry in a moment. She wouldn’t abide Ewan judging, especially when he’d been no better while courting her cousin. “Me? I was there, remember. I watched you and Clarissa. Don’t act the saint now.” She stood, pushing her chair back. “This is my future, Ewan. I am sorry if it is inconvenient for you.”

“Ainsley,” he started. But she didn’t let him finish.

“If my father did one thing, he allowed you and Clarissa the time you needed to find your life together. You won’t push me, Ewan, and we won’t discuss this again.”

He had the decency to look ashamed as she pushed past him. But as she moved toward the door, James filled the entrance. Her anger was boiling over and as she approached him, she didn’t think. Pulling her hand back, she took the two last steps toward him and brought her palm hard against his cheek. The smack echoed about the room. “How dare you!”

He blinked as his hand came to his face. “That hurt.”

“Good.” She gasped out between breaths. “You deserved it.”

He looked at her in surprise. “I was trying to do the right by you.”

For a moment she believed him. But if he’d wanted to do the right thing then he would have proposed this morning and kept their tryst secret. He had some other motive. “You’re lying. I know you are, though I don’t know why. Until you tell me, I won’t marry you. You can’t make me and neither can Ewan.” She squeezed past him and marched down the hall. She needed to speak with Agnes and Clarissa. Surely they would know what to do.

They didn’t. She told them everything. The way he responded to his name, his distance, how he’d gone to Ewan to confess.

Agnes held her hand as she talked. When she finally finished, Agnes spoke. “Has anyone ever loved him?”

“I don’t think so.” Ainsley shook her head. “But he won’t let me try.”

“Try to understand. Keiran resisted for the longest time because he thought he was too far gone for love. James may feel that way too.” Agnes’s gaze was sympathetic.

“Agnes is right,” Clarissa added. “But all the same, don’t forgive him too soon. He has to learn to give more to you and keep less to himself.”

“I don’t want to forgive him.” Ainsley found herself squeezing Agnes’s hand. “I want to smack him again.” But that thought made her think of other passionate activities and a blush stained her cheeks.

Both of the other ladies laughed, though Agnes removed her hand from Ainsley’s as she spoke. “If anyone cam tame such a man, it’s you.”

Ainsley sincerely hoped so but she wasn’t so sure.