I Can’t Lose You

“Jaxson, I’m fine really, and I won’t be home alone. God is living with me now… remember?”

Day tried to reason with his stubborn big brother. Jaxson maneuvered the small sedan into Day’s driveway and Day’s heart rate picked up at the sight of God’s truck already there.

“Oh and when did Cashel get a medical degree?” Jaxson huffed. “You may require medical attention in the middle of the night, and I won’t be there.”

Day smirked. “The only attention I’ll require in the middle of the night won’t require you being there to give it to me.” Day winked. “The right man for the job will be there.”

“You’re a perv.” Jaxson laughed. “Okay, okay. Just take it easy for the next few days and call me tomorrow.”

“All right.” Day leaned over and gave Jaxson a wet, sloppy kiss on the cheek until the man was pushing at him to get away.

Day laughed and grabbed his hospital bag that held his personal items. He looked at his brother.

“Thanks again for coming, Jax. I’ll call you tomorrow. Tell Lisa I said hi and I love her.”

“Will do,” Jax replied and put his car in reverse.

Jaxson backed out of the driveway and Day gave him one final wave before walking up his Ardesia Stone pathway to his front door. Day didn’t tell his brother everything that happened during the raid. Only that he’d got caught in a bad situation and the captain thought he should get checked out medically before going home. Jaxson didn’t like the vague answer, but Day wasn’t ready to discuss the details with anyone else… not until he spoke to God.

He used his key to enter and noticed that not one single light was on downstairs. He went into the kitchen—not bothering to turn on any lights—took a couple bottles of water out the fridge and dragged his tired body upstairs.

He could hear jazz playing quietly as he walked down the hallway, and despite his exhaustion a smile crept across his face.

Day opened the door slowly and squinted at the dark figure standing in front of his window. There were no lights on in the bedroom either, only the light filtering in from the streetlamps outside.

God hadn’t turned around. His back muscles were taut. He had one long arm braced against the top of the windowsill. He was shirtless and his sweats were hanging low on his hips, and Day could just barely make out the fierce lion on God’s back in the pale lighting. Day could smell the freshness of God’s shower. He dropped his bag and placed the water on the dresser.

“Cashel,” Day said softly, his throat still sore from being choked.

God turned around slowly and faced him. Day choked up at the pained expression on his man’s face. He could see that God’s eyes were moist and red-rimmed. Day inched toward him and didn’t stop until he was pressed against that broad chest. God’s strong arms came around him and squeezed him hard. The guttural moan the man released against his temple made Day’s heart seize.

God pulled back and gripped a handful of Day’s hair, pulling so that he was looking up at him. God bent down and gently grazed his soft lips across his. Day’s body vibrated from the sensual feeling. God rubbed his face all over Day’s as if he were a cat marking him with his scent. God’s grip tightened in his hair and he moaned again. Day could feel God’s body trembling and Day didn’t know at that moment if the shaking was from residual fear or need, so he didn’t move as he let his lover do what he needed to do.

God released the punishing grip and his large palms shook as they ghosted over Day’s face. His chin was tilted up by firm fingers and again was blessed with feathery-soft kisses. God leaned back in and draped his arms completely around him and Day embraced him back. The soft piano from the album serenaded them and God just barely rocked their bodies back and forth in a very slow dance. Every few seconds he’d stop to place kisses on his forehead before leaning back in.

When the album finished and the needle lifted, God looked down at him and finally spoke, his voice much more hoarse than usual.

“Shower, sweetheart. I’ll be waiting for you in our bed.”

Day didn’t want to release God, but he did and went into the bathroom, leaving the door open. He undressed quickly and got under the powerful spray. He scrubbed away the sweat, blood, grime, tears, and fears he’d been dirtied with today. He felt so much better after his third wash and finally shut off the taps. Day made quick work of drying his body, brushed his teeth, and walked back into the bedroom. God was already in bed, his large form taking up the entire right side of the California king-size mattress. The stark white sheet was draped loosely over his lower half. Day walked over, grabbed the two bottles of water, and set them on his nightstand just in case he needed them. He climbed onto the tall bed and was grabbed by strong hands and settled on top of his naked lover.

“Cash,” Day moaned.

“Shhh. Just need to hold you,” God said quietly as he rested his chin on top of Day’s wet hair and squeezed him hard against him, protecting him as if someone might come in the middle of the night and try to snatch him away.

Day rose and fell with God’s steady breaths. It was only nine-thirty but it wasn’t long before Day’s exhaustion had him drifting off to sleep.

He was jerked awake only a few hours later by God’s twisting and grunting. Day was being squeezed to death and he was barely able to lift his head to glance at the small digital clock beside the bed. The bright green lights said it was a little after three in the morning.

Day jumped at the loud shout God released into the dark room and struggled to free his confined arms so he could wake his lover.

“Cash, wake up!” Day tried to hold God’s massive arms down as he fought the attacker in his dreams.

“Cash, stop! Wake up!” Day yelled.

“No! Don’t!” God grunted, thrashing beneath Day’s weight.

Fuck.

God was so much stronger than Day and he worried that God would think Day was someone else and start attacking him if he didn’t snap out of it. He was completely on top of God and trying to keep from getting hit. He shook God fiercely and saw him open his eyes wide in terror.

It all happened in the blink of an eye. God locked Day’s arms behind his back and rolled, pinning him down to the mattress and pressing his full weight down on him. Day’s heart rate skyrocketed at the realization that God wasn’t awake yet.

“Cash, it’s me! It’s Leo! Wake up dammit!” he shouted at God and bucked to try to free his hands trapped painfully behind him. His large biceps bulged and flexed with everything he had. He needed to be able to put up his guard. If God started to swing, he had to be able to block the blows.

God blinked again and Day saw the reality seeping in. God’s head jerked back and forth looking all around the dark room.

“Cash, its Leo. Look at me. Look at me,” Day said quickly.

Cash turned and looked down at him and it broke his heart when God squeezed his eyes shut and let go of Day’s arms. Day knew God felt horrible, not only from the nightmare but from potentially hurting him too. Day held in the groan of pain caused by bringing his hands from behind his back and wrapped them protectively around God. He pulled God down to his chest.

“I got you, Cash. It’s all right, it’s just a dream,” Day whispered softly while stroking God everywhere that he could reach.

God’s heart was beating so hard Day could feel it against his own bare chest. He dug his fingers in God’s long hair and massaged his scalp. God squeezed him back.

“He shot you. I couldn’t get to you in time and he shot you,” God said through ragged breaths.

“Fuck,” Day hissed and held God tight to him. “No. You did get to me in time. I’m right here with you. You saved me. You will always save me.”

Day opened his legs and let God sink in between them.

“Damn, I love you so fucking much,” Day whispered.

Day placed kisses on the side of God’s face while God had his nose buried in his neck, breathing him in. They lay still while both of their heart rates returned to normal.

Day moaned softly when God began to grind his hard pelvis in to him. Day’s cock hardened almost instantly and he felt dizzy from the fast rush of blood to his groin.

“Mmmm. Fuck, yeah. Do it, Cash. Take what you need from me,” Day spoke with his lips pressed to God’s ear. His man needed to be assured that he was fine and right here with him. That God had saved him.

God brought both his hands down to Day’s thighs and pulled them up so his feet were flat on the mattress on either side of him. The nightmare had left him hungry with need and power. Although in the dream, God didn’t get to Day in time and Hansen had shot his lover, God had torn the man apart with his bare hands. His coworkers were yelling and cheering him on like at an underground, to-the-death cage fight. He growled, beat, and clawed at Hansen until the man was nothing but a large mass of blood, his limbs thrown in various directions from God’s rage.

He woke up and he was on top of Day and it’d scared him. He didn’t want to ever hurt him while he was asleep, he’d never forgive himself if he did. But Day was strong and capable. Although he was smaller than God—most men were—Day was muscled and fit. His strong chest had defined pecs and flat, ripped abs. His shoulders were sculpted and his biceps had thick veins that protruded when he flexed the large muscles. Day would fight back if he had to and God would be damned if that thought didn’t make him crazy with lust.

Day was underneath him, driving his own hard cock up into him, and demanding that he take him now. God grunted with each hard thrust and bit Day on his shoulder to keep from yelling when Day gripped his aching cock in a tight fist and stroked it roughly.

“Fuck me, goddammit,” Day cursed.

Day fumbled in the nightstand for the lube while they continued to hump each other like wild teenagers. When Day pulled out the supplies, he threw the condom at God and barked at him to put it on.

God’s hands shook profusely while trying to pull the tight latex over his dick as he watched Day lube his own fingers and push two of them forcefully into his ass. Day’s teeth clenched and his eyes slammed shut while he fucked his fingers, quickly reading himself for him.

He’s mine.

God pulled Day’s fingers from his ass, gripped both his wrists, and slammed them against the padded headboard, pinning his hands to the soft leather. He held Day in a submissive position with one hand and used his other to line his cock with Day’s tight hole. He looked into Day’s eyes and saw that his man understood what he needed. He pressed his mouth to Day’s pursed lips and at the same time rammed his cock inside him until his balls slammed against Day’s ass.

They screamed in both agony and bliss. Day’s ass clamped God’s cock in a viselike hold and scorched his dick with a heat that burned him to his toes. God didn’t wait for Day to adjust. He pulled out to his head and plunged back into him repeatedly.

This was not going to be gentle, it wasn’t going to be pretty, it was going to be fast, brutal, and uncontrolled. God held tight to Day’s wrists above his head with one hand and dug into Day’s smooth ass cheek with the other, pulling him open wider.

God’s head was buried in Day’s neck and he lived in his man’s screams as he pounded his ass. Day was his and only his and anyone that challenged him would feel his wrath. His orgasm exploded and he roared loud enough that if Day had close neighbors they’d be calling the cops. He pushed in to the hilt and pumped his come into the rubber, filling it to capacity, again wishing he didn’t have that fucking barrier.

As soon as he could he was going to make sure they were disease free and he could shoot his come so deep inside his lover that he’d taste it.

God panted against Day’s sweaty neck, his cock still semi hard and throbbing. He just barely inched his hips back and let his cock slip out of its silky confinement. He realized his stomach was not only drenched from sweat but also Day’s come.

Motherfucker.

Despite his brutality, his lover had gotten off, and judging by the amount of squishy mess between their muscled torsos, it’d been a damn good one.

God’s cock rested against Day’s hole and he absently pushed against the quivering bud. Day hissed and it made God latch his mouth onto the tender spot on Day’s neck and suck as hard as he could. He was still satisfying his craving to mark Day as his own. If he could have he’d probably have branded him with his name too. Somewhere very visible—maybe his forehead—God’s Property.